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John Austin · (08-25-2013)

You hear the crowd chanting your name, the lights shine bright and the music plays loud. You step through that curtain and the euphoria sets in. That feeling of the thousands that have came out tonight overtakes your body and you think you are superman. For these five, ten or however many minutes, you get to be someone they want to see kick ass. Some say you are a super hero but me, it's a everyday thing....I am just a professional wrestler and this is my life.

Yes everyone, this is the finale installment of Straight Outta Compton. If you have been checking out the XWF site, you know that we have more entries into the Thunderbowl. We have The Triple X Listers, Mr. XWF, Sean Falcon of course, Juan Madison and yes, he is back ladies and gentlemen. He steals your minds and hypnotizes you into watching one of his letdowns...Swift Ion is now in Thunderbowl. My goodness, the card is now getting full. For a minute, I thought you guys actually had a brain but seems like you all don't listen. All I have to tell you guys is WAKE UPPPPP!!!!!.......TIME TO FUCKIN DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now that I have blown out your speakers, maybe you can listen to these words I am speaking. First, I have a message for you Juan.

Hola mi amigo, Juan Madison. No piense ni por un segundo, esa máscara, capa y leotardos me pueden engañar. Pero no te preocupes, eres secreto está a salvo conmigo, amigo. Prometo próximo fin de semana en Shove-it, si te quedas fuera de mi camino, voy a ayudar a eliminar a todos y lo hace hasta sólo tú y yo hermano. Sé que usted puede hablar Inglés perfecto pero pensé que sería mejor para mí hablar con usted en su lengua materna. Su tiempo está llegando a su final, mi amigo y tal vez, si usted es un buen chico, voy a dejar de intentar en la corona cuando gano.

See I can speak your language muchaco. I thought your ass was back over in Tijuana or wherever you are from but no, you decided to show up, masked crusader. When I eliminate your sorry ass next weekend, tell all the chicos I said "yo!" ... Now I would waste my time talking about The Triple X listers or this guy named Mr. XWF but why should I waste my time. I got better things to do like watch a Swift Ion match....seriously!

Now Swift may I say, congrats on the return and sorry to hear about you becoming Callaway's bitch. Let this be a lesson to you bro, when you mess with the big dogs, you will get bitten. While you are in the ring with me, take notes and maybe you will learn something from Mr. Two Two Six Two Four.

Now I recently have got a email from one of the XWF nations own. Let me read this out to you *clears throat in a annoying way*

"Dear John. I recently listened to you're Straight Outta Compton segment. May I say you have been making some mistakes. Like four one...the winner does not straight face John Madison for his crown. The winner receives a twenty four seven briefcase and then he can chose to cash it in on John. Thought I clear up this mistake.

Signed Larry"

Really Larry, oh my mistake. What about you, you motherfucker. "you're Straight Outta Compton segment" ...it's y...o...u...r. not youre. Also "like four one" what are we referring to time now? ...next time you say I made a mistake, check out Y ...O...U....R... own before speaking. Call me a grammar Nazi, call me whatever you want. When you speak to me, USE CORRECT GRAMMAR!!!! ... fuck sakes....

Now then, thank you Larry. Yes, I did make that mistake but let's be honest, do I want to cash in that briefcase on any of the title belts? no. I want that gold crown that sits upon the head of John Madison. I promise one way or another, that crown will grace my big ass dome. Probably have to get it costumed fitted but hey, it's all good in this neighborhood. All of you who I mentioned that have already signed their name on the dotted line to appear, get ready for some serious ass kicking from yours truly. I may rant and rave from time to time but let's be real, everyone of you will want me to be the winner next weekend, not because it feels good but because ...well fuck it, it will feel fantastic, just trust me on that one.

I have been through a-lot in my life. I have been homeless, had battles with drugs and alcohol. I lost my mom to breast cancer but through it all, I survived. Pro wrestling has been my saving grace no matter if I was with The Connection, My wannabe version of Eli's family or under the tutelage of Dutch Mantell back in my early days here. I have had a blast doing what I have loved ever since I was a kid and it's now time for this kid to become King of XWF.

Remember motherfuckers, use correct grammar, always have safe sex and rock out with your cocc....ehhh forget the last one ...just rock out to some good music.

This is John Austin and this has been Straight Outta Compton......

We hear Straight Outta Compton by NWA begin playing as our feed ends. This has been Straight Outta Compton...will there be future episodes of this podcast thing of sorts. Stay tuned for future episodes of Shove-It and Madness....and we may hear more

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