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Stevie Tyler · (07-25-2013)

WILL STEVIE SPARK THE APOCALYPSE?

One moment, Stevie was standing in a local game shop next to the mall asking questions about 7 Wonders. The next, he was in a brightly lit room, surrounded by mirrors of all sizes on all sides. He looks around and notices that the mirrors are warped the way they would be in a funhouse. Some reflections are spot on, some have him shorter and fatter, some have him tall and thin, while there are a few that make him look like a robust Asian.

He walks around, imagining he's in a weird version of Enter the Dragon, and calls out just to see if he's alone. After about 30 minutes of moving in what appears to him to be a circle, someone finally answers in a sophisticated, English accent.

"Welcome, Steven. Forgive me for my rude behavior. I had stepped out a moment. I wasn't expecting you until much later." Stevie was still surrounded by the mirrors, and there was no clue where the voice was coming from. He continued to walk down identical hallways. Stevie didn't know what to say to the voice, so he didn't.

"Hello? Steven? I was quite sure you had arrived. Please, let yourself be known to me. I've waited to speak to you for oh, so very long."

"Hello? Umm...Where are you? Where am I?"

"Oh, goodness me," the disembodied voice said. "How shameful! Here I am, being rude yet again. I'd really rather introduce myself in person, if that's ok. What you want to do is to take a left at the Orcish version of yourself, then a right at the end of that hallway next to rottweiler you." Orcish me? Stevie thought. And the rottweiler is him too? He doesn't question just yet. Stevie just does as he's told and moves down the hallways, taking the appropriate turns and finds himself in front of two hulking, white doors.

One of the doors opens with a whoosh of air that blasts Stevie in the face. The smell of gardenias floods Stevie's nostrils as he enters the room. The room is completely white with no decorations. In the center sits, to Stevie's surprise, a normal looking man in a suit.
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"Ahh! There you are! What a pleasure to find you here! Please, have a seat!" With a snap his fingers, a chair appears directly behind Stevie. It slides forward, causing Stevie to fall into it, and carries him in front of the man. The man in the suit offers his hand to shake, and introduces himself.

"My name is Drotte the Liar. And you are Steven?" Stevie shakes his hand.

"Well, umm...My friends call me Stevie," he says. This whole situation was odd. Normally, especially when Gary brought him to Hell or any other dimension, he could feel Gary's presence. Most of the time, he was there with him. That's not the case on this trip.

"Well, we've just met, haven't we? I don't quite believe either of us should be so forward to be calling the other a friend, do you? Steven...Steven...Might you have been bestowed that moniker in honor of the Christian martyr, Stephen?" Drotte asks.

"I...uhh...I think I was named after the Aerosmith guy," Stevie responds. This was true, as has been stated by your faithful narrator in the past.

"Ahh, I see. I am afraid am not familiar with Aerosmith. You see, it has been quite some time since I have been in contact with a member of your species." A drink appears in Drotte's hand. He takes a sip. A fly buzzes out of his ear and then blinks out of existence.

"I should just get to the point. I'm certain you have business to attend to. I do also apologize for bring you here and such short notice. I do hate rudeness, and here I am. Oh, me. Baal'Nezz Golgari. You do belong to him, do you not?"

"I wouldn't say that I belong to him," Stevie says defensively.

"Oh, right. Humans are prideful, aren't they," Drotte says to himself, but just at the same volume as the rest. "No, I don't suppose you would say that. That is the truth, however. He does control you against your will, does he not?" Drotte's got him there.

"Well, yeah...but..."

"Oh, 'but'. There is no 'but' and it's not important anyway. I already knew as much before you arrived here. That's the whole reason you even are here. The point of the matter, Steven, is that you are in danger." Drotte takes another sip of his drink and leans back in his chair.

"What are you talking about," Stevie asks.

"My, my, good boy. You are quite the impatient one." He is. "You see, Baal'Nezz was never supposed to be here. He was not one of us. He was too lazy and indecisive."

"What do you mean 'one of us'? Who are you?"

"Why, I already told you who I am. I am Drotte the Liar. And 'we' are The Heavenly Host the rebelled against Him," Drotte responded.

"If you're 'the Liar', why should I believe anything you're saying here?"

"You absolutely should not, Steven. It is a moniker I have earned. I wouldn't believe me, but then again, it's not my life that is in danger, is it?" Stevie shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"As I was saying, Baal'Nezz, at one time, resided in Heaven as did the rest of us. We, The Host, not including Baal'Nezz, had planned and plotted for millennia. We knew that we would never actually be able to overthrow the Lord of Hosts, because he is quite the cheater, but we had hoped to at least be heard. Baal'Nezz had slept through the entire insurrection and only woke as we were being sent to our new home. He followed along, because that is his nature. He saw what you humans would call 'the cool kids' and went behind them, unquestioning. By the time he had realized his mistake, the Gates were closed, and there was no going back."

"What does this have to do with me?" Stevie wanted to know.

"The threat facing you, Steven, is that Baal'Nezz now has a target on his head from both sides. There are those in this realm that would see him and all attached to him bound and tortured for eternity. You see, Hell is our home. It may not be the most splendid place in existence or beyond, but it is what you make it. Many here are of the libertarian mindset as well, and they feel that they have earned this place. Baal'Nezz just happened upon it, and they don't appreciate that. Couple that with the fact that, to the remaining Host, Baal'Nezz is part of an enemy force. They will not hear reason. Now, you are one with him."

Stevie begins to sweat profusely. He'd pee his pants, but he did that in the last RP and it's not time to milk that cow again.

"So...so...What you're telling me is..."

"What I'm telling you is what I've told you. It would not take much for the two forces to converge in an apocalyptic combat yet again. Since they are both aiming for one target, thanks to Baal'Nezz's negligence, you could easily be flashpoint to Armageddon, Steven."

"Is...is there a way to...Not be that thing you said?"

"Short of ridding yourself of the parasite? It is doubtful. However...No, don't mind that," said Drotte the Liar.

"Don't mind what!? TELL ME!?" Stevie demanded in a panic.

"Oh, come now. Don't be so melodramatic. One thing that might help to, at least, postpone the battle would be to...Oh, silly me. I forgot. Isn't that odd? Well, it's been nice getting to meet you, Steven. Ta-ta."

WIth another snap of Drotte's fingers, Stevie finds himself right back in the game shop with just a little vomit right under the neck of his shirt.

"That's the craziest thing I've ever seen," said the man behind the counter that had previously been explaining a game to Stevie. He was, of course, referring to Stevie's eyes changing and him convulsing on the floor while in his meeting with Drotte.

Stevie began to cry.

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