Threaded Mode | Linear Mode

"Big Puddin'" Herschel Kiss · (03-13-2024)

The scene opens inside of a Krispy Kreme donut location in Port Huron, MI. The sounds of restaurant equipment can be heard in the distance as the KK workers continually pump out donuts at an alarming rate. As the camera focuses in, Big Puddin can be seen shoveling donuts into his mouth one after another..

HK: WOOOOO! LEMME GET ANOTHER ONE OF DEM GLAZES JOINTS, MY GUY! THEM SHITS SLAP, FAM! WOOOO!

One of the employees brings out another large platter of glazed donuts for Big Puddin.

Employee: Here you are sir, whenever you are ready for the bill, let me know and I will get you squared away.

HK smiles and laughs a bit to himself.

HK: You play too much little bro, I ain’t payin for these, put em on the XWF tab. I know Lane good for it.

The employee looks bewildered as he raises an eyebrow..

Employee: Sir, we don’t accept tabs here in this establishment. Also, I have never heard of the XWF, so whatever little company that is, will need to pay for these upfront, right now, or I will be forced to call the police.

Big Puddin stands up quickly, or well, as quickly as he can cause he kinda fat, knocking over the tiny table and sending donuts flying all over the place!

HK: WHAAAAAAAT? THE XWF IS THE GREATEST, BIGGEST, GREATEST, LARGEST, WORST COMPANY IN THE WORLD, HOW YOU NOT HEAR ABOUT IT? ALSO, I AIN’T PAYING FOR THIS SHIT, I DONE ATE BOUT 1K WORTH OF DONUTS!

The employee yells back to his manager to call the police as HK attempts to run away, stumbling, and falling directly on a mother and her child!

HK: SHIT BITCH, MOVE YOUR DOG ASS, I GOTTA GO! FUCK YOU AND THAT UGLY ASS BABY, WOOOOO!

Big Puddin gathers himself quickly and bolts out the door, quickly flagging down an oncoming public bus and hoping aboard. As he sits down, breathing so heavy he sounds like a snoring cow. Quickly he pulls out his phone, opens the camera, and begins to record a video..

HK: Aight, heres the scoop. I might be going to jail, so I need to get this shit out of the way like right now.

Anarchy.

Big Puddin.

Fightin' for nothin', apparently!

You guys see the shit show they got me into this time? Last Anarchy I make a play at the Xtreme belt. Then my boy Preesh be like, sup Puddin, need a hand? I'm all like, hell yeah's, get yo fat ass over here and hold this n***a down! Next thing I know, Pariah done pulled a Road Runner on my ass.

Well, ain't me or Preesh about that runnin' life, so we hang back and find catering.

By the way, Anarchy Catering is way better than Warfare catering.

We got pizza from Domino's, Taco Bell, Micky D's, Chick Fillet, Long John Silvers, Pufferbellies, and all sorts of local cruzine wherever we go.

But best thing about Anarchy catering isn't what we got, it's what we ain't got. We ain't got no Bobby Bourbon eating all the damn food before we can get there! Okay, unfair, it ain't just him. It be him, his Bourbon men, his BOB cronies... which might just be TK now, but that n***a can eat!

Shit, I'm way off topic. Point is, while me and Preesh are hanging back at catering talking about me maybe rejoining BOB now that Preesh is running that shit, I see Pariah running out on camera as the show closes. His britches more yellow than gold–talkin' bout how he been running all night and he done with that shit. Then laying down an open invitation for that Xtreme belt before running some more!

Fool, is you serious right now?

Make matters worse, this clown somehow run his ass to the wrong catering table and I think that made Bobby territorial and protective of his lunch meats.

Whatever the case, Pariah got flattened, and 'Big Puddin's' championship dreams got slashed, an now they got me fighting for free. Yeah, I get a paycheck. Sure, I get to enjoy some more of that fine Anarchy catering.

But, I get those things every show without having to work. This week I have to work, and I don't make more money. I don't get better catering, but I do get to sweat. I do get to be tired. Sore. Hungry. Angry.

Sirens can be heard in the distance potentially closing in on HK’s location on this public bus..

HK: AH FUCK DA FUZZ IS COMIN, I GOTTA GO, BUT JUST KNOW IMA FUCK GOLDY UP GOOD FOR MAKING ME WORK!

The scene fades as HK waddles down the road in a hurry.

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode I DON'T LIKE WORK NA!*
Author	Message