As the camera begins its sweeping journey across the ocean, we shift our gaze to the USS Lexington, a formidable vessel anchored in Corpus Christi, Texas.
The historic warship, bearing the scars of battles long past, rests solemnly in the harbor. Its steel hull glistens under the Texan sun.
The USS Lexington's imposing cannons, once instruments of destruction, now stand as a tribute to its storied past. Yet today, they serve a different purpose.
With a thunderous roar, the ship's cannons come to life, firing brilliant pyrotechnics into the sky, illuminating the waters and the night itself. The explosion of color and light rivals the mightiest fireworks display, a dazzling spectacle that rivals even the stars.
As the sky shimmers and sparkles, we transition to the ship's flight deck, where the Anarchy ring awaits. The cheers and anticipation of the small crowd aboard this mighty vessel fill the air.
Zooming overhead, Anarchy CamDrones capture the electrifying atmosphere, soaring past banners that proclaim:
CENTURION vs. DICK DRIZZLE: BATTLE OF THE AGES!
THUGGIN AND MUGGIN
DO BOB'S SINK OR SWIM?
MR. OZ: FOLLOW THE BRICK ROAD...TO DROWNING!
And that sign being held up by the really odd looking chick...
I WANT TO BE A MISFIT!
GATOR: "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to 'ANARCHY OF THE DAMNED'! We're broadcasting live from the USS Lexington in Corpus Christi, Texas, and it's Halloween havoc aboard this haunted ship!"
TODD: "That's right, Gator! Tonight, we've got an electrifying lineup, starting with French Canadian Bed Shitter taking on Latina Submission Machina in a Flagship Flag Match. They'll be battling to hoist their country's flag high above the ship's mast!"
GATOR: "Indeed, Todd! And speaking of heights, we've got Bob D facing off against Mr. Oz in a Phantom's Plunge Match. The only way to win is to send your opponent off the USS Lexington's flight deck and into the dark abyss of the sea. And let's not forget, the XTREME TITLE is on the line!"
TODD: "Next up, we've got The Thugs, John Black and Tommy Wish, taking on Molly Barnes and Roger in a Skeleton Crew Tag Team Match. It's going to be a spooktacular showdown with eerie skeletal props and decorations all around!"
GATOR: "Absolutely, Todd! And in a Trick or Treat Match, Centurion faces off against 'The Natural' Dick Drizzle. What's under those goody bags beneath the ring? Will it be a delightful treat or a devious trick?"
TODD: "And in our main event, EDWARD defends the Anarchy Championship against Mastermind in a Haunted Havoc match within the USS Lexington's engine room. It's bound to be spine-chilling with weapons strewn about and the lingering presence of ghastly apparitions!"
GATOR: "Ohhh, Spooky! Buckle up, folks! 'ANARCHY OF THE DAMNED' starts NOW!!!"
FRENCH CANADIAN BED SHITTER
- vs -
LATINA SUBMISSION MACHINA w/ CHARLIE NICKLES
Flagship Flag Match: Set on the eerie confines of the USS Lexington's haunted decks, the sole path to victory is to hoist your country's flag high above the ship's mast, claiming it as your own and asserting your dominance over the lesser nation.
The Canadian National Anthem plays throughout as Frankenstein Can Be Scary makes his way to the ring aboard the USS Lexington, scowling at children and ladies as he does. He carries a Canadian flag on a pole with him, proudly staking it atop his turnbuckle as he turns to look at the haunted mast standing tall just outside the ring.
TODD: This French Canadian man sure has made a lot of enemies aboard the USS Lexington tonight!
GATOR: You know what they say: Canada is just French Mexico!
The Mexican National Anthem plays across the ship's PA system as we see Latina Submission Machina kneeling on the ground, holding up the flag of her nation on a steel pole! Pyrotechnics pop off the entrance ramp just as the crowd hits it's biggest pop of the night.
Behind her, we see Charlie Nickles lurking in the shadows with a shovel in-hand.
TODD: And here comes that sick freak, Charlie Nickles.
GATOR: Why is he even with LSM?
TODD: Because he's her father, Gator, and a good dad always supports his kids!
Latina Submission Machina bounces to her feet, waving the flag of her nation in the air. Her half-painted face is twisted into an angry expression, but really that's just for the camera, because this luchadora is as calculated and cerebral as they come! She walks down the entrance ramp with a confident swagger before climbing the steel steps and slipping between the ropes. LSM charges onto one of the turnbuckles and holds her nation's flag up high. The Nickleman follows her and waits just outside the ring, his hands gripping that shovel tightly. Eventually, LSM places her flagpole onto the turnbuckle fixture as she continues waving to the crowd.
DING!
The bell rings aboard the USS Lexington. LSM and FCBS tie up in the ring as Charlie circles outside the ring with a shovel in hand. FCBS uses his strength to get the immediate upper hand, pushing LSM back into a neutral turnbuckle before he starts laying into her with devastating knees to the gut, causing LSM to lose her grip on the FCBS. Charlie can be seen approaching that side of the ring with his shovel, but the referee warns him off as FCBS continues taking liberties with The Nickleman's bastard daughter.
TODD: It looks like Charlie wants to get involved! Turns out he's not just out here for morale support!
GATOR: A shovel is such an odd choice tho, innit?
FCBS backs off LSM for a quick second, allowing her to posture up against the turnbuckle. Then, FCBS reddens her chest with a thunderous knife chop! The crowd gasps as the echo of the knife chop reverberates through the haunted decks of the ship. LSM falls forward out of her corner, quickly getting wrapped up by FCBS in a roll-up pin!
FCBS keeps the pin in until the referee reminds him that's not the match stipulation!
TODD: I think we forgot to translate the card for the French Canadian!
GATOR: But for the record, he DEFINITELY had her shoulders down for 3 seconds!
FCBS relents, releasing the pin before scrambling up the turnbuckle to go grab his flagpole. FCBS grabs the flag, leaps over the top rope, then hopes down from the ringside apron as he bullrushes the ship's mast with his flag, intent on climbing it as fast as possible!
GATOR: Jesus bleedin' Christ, I didn't know Canadians could run that fast! Look at him go!
TODD: I think it's the FRENCH in him helping him run so fast! You know they always run away from a good fight!
FCBS charges to the mast, but before he can reach it, LSM comes diving between the ropes, completely wiping him out!
TODD: LOOK OUT BELOW!
LSM crashes atop FCBS, appearing to momentarily knock him out. She quickly picks herself up and treks back to her flag, grabbing it off the turnbuckle.
GATOR: LSM has grabbed ahold of her country's flag- now it's her turn to race up the mast!
LSM charges towards the mast, passing by Charlie as she goes to raise her flag up high. But before the luchadora can begin climbing the mast, she's hit in the back of the head- with a shovel! By her own father!
TODD: Wait, what's he doing?!
Charlie stands over LSM's crumpled body as the Mexican flag begins draping over her. The Nickleman snickers to himself before clubbing LSM in the face a few more times with the shovel. When the luchadora tries to defend herself by rolling over, she's greeted with a shovel to the back of the skull!
GATOR: Charlie Nickles is turning on his own daughter, in most brutal fashion!
FCBS gets up and sees Charlie completely wailing on LSM with the shovel, but instead of helping her he simply grabs his flag and climbs the ship's mast, raising the Canadian flag high over the USS Lexington while Charlie continues brutalizing his own daughter with a shovel!
WINNER BY FLAG - F.C.B.S.
FCBS celebrates his victory before heading back to the locker room. Meanwhile, outside the ring aboard the USS Lexington, all the fans are completely in shock as THE NICKLEMAN continues bruising and battering LSM with a shovel! She tries to crawl away from him, but the now blood-flag is wrapping her body up and preventing her from getting very far. Her bastard father places the tip of the shovel against her neck, holding her in place at the threat of decapitation, as he kneels down next to her.
The camera zooms in as we hear The Nickleman's final words to his daughter.
Charlie: You stupid, conniving waste of my seed! FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY? While I'm trying to save your failed lucha career? Stupid, stupid!
The Nickleman spits in his daughter's bloody face as he berates her.
TODD: Ok, Charlie's starting to really go too far! Someone needs to stop him!
GATOR: Who, Todd?! We put barely any security on the USS Lexington- and almost every other wrestler is preparing for their match tonight somewhere else! There's no one who can help the luchadora now!
LSM squirms and begs to be freed through bloody hiccups, but The Nickleman pays her no mind as he keeps the shovel pressed to her neck.
Charlie: You're a waste of my time, a waste of my potential, a waste of my breath. The only thing you could have been good for- enhancing my career- you've chosen to do the opposite! You don't think I know what you say on twitter, you don't think I see how you're rooting for those cunts like Vhokda Black and Sahara Duke to win the Strength Trials?
You stupid bitch, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO CHEER FOR ME! But now...this really is THE END!
The Nickleman, in a fit of rage, shoves the shovel down through LSM's fleshy neck. Blood squirts out as LSM releases a dying gasp. Her bastardly father stands over her, shovel still in-hand, as he looks down at her nearly decapitated body, still wrapped in the Mexican flag.
Charlie: C'est la vie, you stupid foreign bitch!
The Nickleman kicks LSM's flag-wrapped body into the depths of the ocean before throwing the shovel in behind her. From out of nowhere, a helicopter with the #TEAMTLS flag from TRIAD shows up on the scene, flying to a spot just above The Nickleman. A rope ladder is dropped down, and Charlie climbs onto it. The helicopter flies away as Charlie swings from the ladder, flipping off the XWF Anarchy cameras one last time.
GATOR: "Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for the match that's been brewing for weeks! BOB D defending his Xtreme Title against Mr. Oz in the Phantom's Plunge Match! This one's going to be brutal!"
TODD: "That's right, Gator! No ring ropes, no barriers, just the treacherous flight deck of the USS Lexington and the open sea below. It's a high-risk, high-reward battle for the Xtreme Title!"
The crowd buzzes as BOB D, the Xtreme Champion, makes his way to the top of the USS Lexington's flight deck. He wears a sinister grin on his face, ready for the battle ahead. Mr. Oz follows, a determined look in his eyes, knowing that this match could be his ticket to championship glory.
GATOR: "BOB D is as cocky as ever, Todd. He's got that title around his waist, and he doesn't intend to let go easily."
TODD: "But Mr. Oz has proven himself to be a formidable challenger, and he's got a shot at glory tonight. The Xtreme Title is on the line, and both these men are willing to risk it all!"
The referee, standing on the edge of the flight deck, holds the Xtreme Title high in the air for all to see. The crowd roars in anticipation as the official signals for the match to begin.
DING!
GATOR: "Here we go, folks! The bell has rung, and this Phantom's Plunge Match is officially underway!"
Both competitors cautiously circle each other on the precarious deck. The wind howls around them, and the sea below churns with darkness.
TODD: "This is a dangerous environment, Gator. One wrong move, and it's a long way down."
BOB D takes the initiative, lunging forward with a wild swing, but Mr. Oz ducks just in time. The miss causes BOB D to stumble dangerously close to the edge, but he regains his footing at the last moment.
GATOR: "That was a close call, Todd! Inches away from taking the plunge!"
Mr. Oz retaliates with a powerful kick to BOB D's midsection, and the champion doubles over in pain. Oz grabs BOB D by the head, looking to execute a DDT.
TODD: "Mr. Oz with a big opportunity here! If he hits that DDT, it could be game over for BOB D!"
But BOB D manages to block the DDT attempt, countering with a sudden suplex attempt of his own. The crowd watches in suspense as both men teeter dangerously close to the edge of the flight deck.
GATOR: "Ladies and gentlemen, we've got ourselves a barn-burner here on the USS Lexington! The Xtreme Championship is on the line, and these two are giving it their all!"
TODD: "That's right, Gator! Mr. Oz and BOB D are locked in a fierce battle, and neither one is showing any signs of giving up!"
The Phantom's Plunge Match rages on, with the USS Lexington's flight deck as the unforgiving battleground. BOB D, the Xtreme Champion, and Mr. Oz have already been through hell and back in this no-holds-barred encounter.
GATOR: "They've been brawling all over the deck, Todd, and the sea below is waiting for one of them to take the plunge!"
TODD: "Mr. Oz, at 6'8", has been imposing his will on BOB D, but the champion isn't going down without a fight!"
BOB D and Mr. Oz find themselves near the edge of the flight deck, both visibly fatigued but determined to secure the Xtreme Championship. Mr. Oz, using his immense size advantage, delivers a powerful clothesline that nearly takes BOB D's head off.
GATOR: "What a clothesline by Mr. Oz! He's looking to finish this!"
BOB D, however, digs deep and fights through the pain. He surprises Mr. Oz with a quick bear hug, attempting to squeeze the energy out of his opponent.
TODD: "BOB D with a bear hug! He's trying to sap Mr. Oz's strength!"
But Mr. Oz powers out of the bear hug, displaying his incredible strength, and hip tosses BOB D onto the hard deck. The champion writhes in pain as Mr. Oz seizes control.
GATOR: "Mr. Oz is dominating right now, Todd! BOB D is in trouble!"
Mr. Oz ascends to the top rope, ready to deliver a high-risk move. He leaps off with a crossbody, intending to crush BOB D beneath his massive frame. But BOB D rolls out of the way just in time, and Mr. Oz crashes onto the deck.
TODD: "BOB D with the evasion! Mr. Oz just hit the deck hard!"
BOB D seizes the opportunity and climbs to the top turnbuckle. He leaps off with a knee drop, connecting squarely with Mr. Oz's chest.
GATOR: "Knee drop by BOB D! He's making a comeback!"
BOB D quickly follows up with a shoulder tackle, trying to bring the towering Mr. Oz to his knees.
TODD: "BOB D is showing incredible resilience here! He's taking the fight to Mr. Oz!"
BOB D delivers a series of strikes, including a backflip kick (Pele Kick) that rocks Mr. Oz. He follows it up with a big boot and a dropkick that sends Mr. Oz stumbling backward.
GATOR: "BOB D is throwing everything he's got at Mr. Oz! He wants to retain that Xtreme Championship!"
Mr. Oz, though dazed, suddenly regains his composure and spears BOB D with a vicious striking spear. BOB D crashes to the deck, gasping for air.
TODD: "A devastating spear by Mr. Oz! He's turning the tide!"
Mr. Oz lifts BOB D up with ease, performing a gorilla press gutbuster that leaves the champion writhing in agony.
GATOR: "Mr. Oz's power is on full display! He's dismantling BOB D!"
Mr. Oz attempts to finish the match with a hurricanrana, but BOB D counters with a powerful body slam.
TODD: "BOB D with a counter! He's not giving up!"
BOB D gathers his strength and executes a Double A Spinebuster, planting Mr. Oz into the deck.
GATOR: "The champion is rallying, Todd! He's going for the win!"
BOB D takes a deep breath and signals for his finishing move, The Dan Slam. With a mighty effort, he lifts the massive Mr. Oz onto his left shoulder, spinning him 90 degrees, and slams him onto the deck with incredible force.
TODD: "The Dan Slam! BOB D pulled it off!"
GATOR: "What an unbelievable ending, Todd! BOB D executed The Dan Slam, and he sent Mr. Oz hurtling off the side of the ship!"
TODD: "It's over! BOB D has retained the Xtreme Championship in spectacular fashion!"
As Mr. Oz goes overboard and disappears into the dark abyss of the ocean below, BOB D collapses onto the deck, utterly exhausted but victorious. The crowd erupts in cheers, celebrating the champion's incredible feat.
WINNER AND STILL X-TREME CHAMPION - BOB D!!!
GATOR: "BOB D fought tooth and nail to keep that title, and he did it! What a match!"
TODD: "This was an unforgettable battle on the USS Lexington, and BOB D has emerged as the victor!"
BOB D, clutching his Xtreme Championship tightly, stares out into the sea, where Mr. Oz vanished.
SUDDENLY!!!
GATOR: "Wait a minute, Todd! Look! It's Mr. Oz! He's back!"
TODD: "This is like something out of a horror movie! What's he planning now?"
With a twisted grin, Mr. Oz clung to the side of the ship and extended a his hand toward BOB D. With a chilling grip, Mr. Oz dragged BOB D over the side of the ship and with him into the pitch black depths below.
TODD: "BOB D's been pulled into the ocean by the vengeful Mr. Oz!"
GATOR: "Great, now he'll never work another Anarchy!"
Somewhere inside of the ship…
Big Preesh: (shouting) YEAH, BITCH! Big Preesh is in the house, and this spooky ship ain't ready for this sexy beast!
As Big Preesh continues his swagger down the corridor, he suddenly spots a group of costumed crew members who seem to be setting up a prank for Halloween.
Crew Member 1: (whispering) Here he comes. Get ready!
They scatter into the shadows, leaving behind a fake skeleton propped up against a barrel, adorned with a BOB tee shirt similar to Preesh's.
Big Preesh approaches the skeleton and stops in his tracks.
Big Preesh: (raising an eyebrow) Well, well, well, what do we got here? Another Preesh fan, huh? I can't blame ya. Big Preesh is a legend! (winks)
He leans in closer, examining the skeleton's shirt.
Big Preesh: (nodding) That's a mighty fine tee you got there, buddy! But let me show you how it's done. (grinning)
Big Preesh grabs the skeleton by its bony arm and effortlessly lifts it high into the air, much like he would an opponent in the ring. The crew members, hidden in the shadows, gasp in surprise.
Crew Member 2: (whispering) Is he... talking to the skeleton?
Big Preesh: (playfully) Now, listen up, my bony friend. You gotta PREESH UP, SON! That's right, just like this!
With a sudden burst of energy, Big Preesh swings the skeleton around before delivering his trademark Big Brain Chop. The skeleton's head goes flying, and the crew members watch in disbelief.
Crew Member 3: (whispering) Did he just... behead our skeleton?
Big Preesh, realizing what he's done, freaks out and starts panicking. He looks around to make sure nobody witnessed his accidental decapitation.
Big Preesh: (muttering to himself) Oh, no, no, no! What have I done? I didn't mean to... I didn't know my own strength!
Panicking, Big Preesh takes a quick glance around, making sure that no one saw the unintentional destruction of the “fan”.
With his heart racing, he decides to make a hasty exit.
Big Preesh: (whispering to himself) Gotta get outta here before anyone finds out!
Big Preesh bolts down the corridor, disappearing from view. Behind him, the crew members burst into hysterical laughter at the absurdity of the entire situation.
GATOR: Well, Todd, I've seen a lot of things in this business, but that might just take the cake!
TODD: You said it, Gator. Big Preesh certainly has a unique way of greeting his "fans". I hope that skeleton wasn't too attached to its head!
THE THUGS
JOHN BLACK & TOMMY WISH
- vs -
MOLLY BARNES & ROGER Skeleton Crew Tag Team Match: The ring is filled with eerie skeletal props and decorations. Wrestlers can use the props as weapons, but the only way to win is by pinfall or submission inside the ring.
GATOR: "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to this spine-tingling Skeleton Crew Tag Team Match! The ring is decked out with all sorts of creepy decorations, and we're about to witness some bone-rattling action!"
TODD: "That's right, Gator! It's a unique environment for a tag team match, and our competitors are ready to make the most of it. But where's Molly Barnes? Roger is starting this match at a disadvantage."
The ominous music fills the arena as the team of John Black and Tommy Wish, collectively known as The Thugs, make their entrance. They stride confidently towards the ring, clearly enjoying the spooky atmosphere.
GATOR: "Here come The Thugs, Todd, and they seem to be right at home in this eerie setting. They're ready for action!"
TODD: "Indeed, they are, Gator. But the big question remains: will Molly Barnes make an appearance tonight?"
As The Thugs await their opponents, the arena's lights dim further, and eerie music begins to play. Suddenly, a fog rolls in, enveloping the ring. The crowd watches in anticipation, but Molly Barnes is nowhere to be seen.
GATOR: "It looks like Molly Barnes is a no-show, Todd. Roger will have to go it alone against The Thugs in this spooky environment."
TODD: "What a disappointing turn of events for Roger. He's got to be feeling the pressure now."
The referee checks with Roger, who nods to confirm that he's ready to compete solo. With the match about to begin, The Thugs exchange a few words and decide to send John Black into the ring first, while Roger steps forward for his team.
DING!
GATOR: "And here we go! The Skeleton Crew Tag Team Match is underway, but it's essentially become a handicap match."
TODD: "Roger is going to have to dig deep if he hopes to stand a chance against both John Black and Tommy Wish."
John Black and Roger circle each other cautiously. Roger lunges forward, attempting to grapple with Black, but Black counters with a swift knee to the midsection. He follows up with a clubbing blow to Roger's back, driving him to the mat.
GATOR: "John Black wasting no time here, Todd, taking the fight straight to Roger!"
TODD: "Roger's heart may be willing, but this is an uphill battle for him. The Thugs are ruthless competitors."
John Black continues his assault, delivering stomps and kicks to Roger's prone form. He then grabs one of the skeletal props and raises it high, ready to strike Roger.
GATOR: "John Black with a bone to pick, quite literally!"
TODD: "Roger needs to find a way to turn the tide, and fast!"
Suddenly, Roger springs to life, surprising John Black with a lightning-fast roll-up pin!
ONE!
TWO!!
But John Black kicks out just in the nick of time. Both men scramble to their feet, and Roger manages to duck under a clothesline attempt by Black. He then springs off the ropes, executing a weird flying head attack that sends John Black reeling!
GATOR: "Roger showing incredible resilience! He's fighting back against the odds!"
TODD: "He's got to use his agility and speed to his advantage, Gator. That's his best shot here."
Roger attempts to capitalize on his momentum. He grabs another skeletal prop, a plastic skull, and smashes it over John Black's head, sending him crashing to the canvas.
GATOR: "Innovative offense by Roger, using those props to his advantage!"
TODD: "He's got to pull out all the stops in this situation."
With John Black dazed, Roger ascends the turnbuckle, perched high above the ring. The crowd erupts with anticipation as Roger takes a deep breath and leaps off, connecting with a terribly executed diving elbow drop!
GATOR: "What a high-risk maneuver by Roger! He's going for the win!"
TODD: "He's got to make every move count in this match!"
Roger goes for the cover!
ONE!
TWO!!
But Tommy Wish dives into the ring, breaking up the pin with a well-placed stomp to Roger's back. The referee dresses down Tommy, who exits the ring, but the damage is done.
GATOR: "Tommy Wish saving the match for his team, but Roger came incredibly close there!"
TODD: "Roger can't afford to let those near falls get to him. He's got to stay focused."
John Black and Tommy Wish now regroup outside the ring, sharing a quick strategy session. Roger watches them closely, realizing that he's up against a formidable duo.
GATOR: "The Thugs are regrouping, Todd. They know they've got the advantage in this match."
TODD: "Roger needs to stay vigilant. He's already shown that he can surprise his opponents."
As The Thugs re-enter the ring, Roger springs back into action. He dodges a clothesline attempt by John Black, then catches Tommy Wish with a quick dropkick, sending him sprawling to the outside. Roger seizes the opportunity and attempts to roll up John Black again.
ONE!
TWO!!
But John Black kicks out once more.
Roger knows he needs to do more to secure the victory.
GATOR: "Roger is giving it his all, but The Thugs are proving to be a tough challenge."
TODD: "He's got to keep the pressure on and find an opening."
Roger, determined to overcome the odds, drags John Black to his feet and attempts something from the powerbomb position. He positions John Black, but Black counters with a back body drop, sending Roger crashing to the mat.
GATOR: "John Black with a crucial counter! He's looking to regain control."
TODD: "Roger's resilience is impressive, but he's in a tough spot right now."
John Black quickly tags in Tommy Wish, and the two Thugs execute a double team move. They hoist Roger into the air and deliver a crushing Drive-Bye (3D) onto a pile of the skeletal props.
GATOR: "A devastating double team maneuver by The Thugs! This could be it!"
TODD: "Roger may be out cold after that brutal impact."
Tommy Wish covers Roger.
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
WINNERS VIA PINFAL - THE THUGS!!!
GATOR: "The Thugs secure the victory in this unique Skeleton Crew Tag Team Match, Todd!"
TODD: "Roger gave it his all, but in the end, the numbers game was just too much."
The Thugs music begins to play again as The Thugs celebrate their win in the ring, while Roger lies on the canvas.
GATOR: "Roger fought valiantly tonight, and although he didn't come out with the win, he's proven that he's a force to be reckoned with in the XWF."
TODD: "Absolutely, Gator. He may not have had Molly Barnes by his side, but he put up one hell of a fight."
The Thugs exit the ring, victorious, as medical personnel tend to Roger in the ring, ensuring he's okay after a grueling battle.
CENTURION
- vs -
'THE NATURAL' DICK DRIZZLE Trick or Treat Match: Mysterious goody bags await beneath the ring. Will you discover a delightful treat to bolster your advantage, or will you uncover a devious trick that could alter the course of the contest?
GATOR: "Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for our next bout! Centurion is making his way to the ring, and this crowd is fired up!"
TODD: "Centurion is one of the all-time legends in the XWF, and he's back to prove that he's still got what it takes to compete at the highest level!"
GATOR: "Here comes Centurion, and he looks focused and ready for action!"
Centurion strides confidently down the entrance ramp, his eyes locked on the ring. He raises his hand high in the air, acknowledging the cheers from the audience. The crowd erupts with excitement as Centurion reaches the ring apron, and he climbs up the steel steps before entering the squared circle.
TODD: "Centurion is in the ring, and he's soaking in the adulation from this Corpus Christi crowd!"
GATOR: "But he's got a tough challenge ahead of him in 'The Natural' Dick Drizzle!"
As Centurion stands in the center of the ring, awaiting his opponent, the anticipation in the arena continues to build.
GATOR: "And here comes 'The Natural' Dick Drizzle, Todd!"
TODD: "Dick Drizzle is known for his mind games and unorthodox tactics. Let's see what he has in store tonight!"
Dick Drizzle emerges from the curtain with a cocky swagger, a mischievous grin on his face. He taunts the fans at ringside, reveling in the mixed reaction he receives. Drizzle then makes his way down the ramp, never taking his eyes off Centurion in the ring.
GATOR: "Dick Drizzle is oozing confidence, Todd!"
TODD: "He's got his sights set on Centurion, and this match is about to get underway!"
The two competitors exchange intense stares from opposite sides of the ring as the referee signals for the match to begin.
DING!
The bell rings as the crowd hops to their feet, expecting a battle. Centurions cracks his knuckles as he walks into the center of the ring, holding his hand high in the air for a classic test of strength. Dick Drizzle smirks as he slowly exits his own corner, mocking Centurion's walk with his own exaggerated movements. Dick Drizzle then slaps Centurion's hand out of the air before poking a finger in his chest and talking a whole bunch of smack to the returning XWF legend.
TODD: It looks like Drizzle is more focused on dressing down Centurion than he is in beating him up!
GATOR: It's classic wrestling psychology, Todd! Weaken your opponent's mind, then weaken their body!
Centurion finally has enough of Dick's antics as he slaps Drizzle's finger away from his chest. Centurion then raises his own finger, pointing it in Dick's chest as he talks some smack right back. Instead of listening respectfully, however, Dick Drizzle seizes the opportunity to kick Centurion with a lowblow! Centurion groans in pain as his hands lower down to his groin. Dick grins as Centurion keels over in pain, and that's when Dick Drizzle brings Centurion straight down to the mat with a DDT!
GATOR: See Todd! Psychological Warfare works!
Dick sits up as Centurion rolls on the mat in pain. Dick looks at the referee and shrugs, giving him an 'oopsie daisie' for the low blow, knowing the ref can't DQ him in this match type. Following his logic, Dick slowly rolls out of the ring before he lifts up the ring apron and checks underneath the ring for a trick bag. Dick pulls out a small black cloth bag with a pumpkin sewn onto it. Meanwhile, back in the ring, Centurion is picking himself up and dusting himself off.
TODD: Dick Drizzle grabs the first bag of the night: let's see if it will have a trick or a treat!
Dick waves at Centurion before showing off his goody bag. Centurion groans as he waits in the ring, taking up a defensive posture. Dick smiles as he opens the bag, only to be immediately greeted by a swarm of wasps flying up at him!
GATOR: THERE WAS WASPS IN THE BAG?!?!
TODD: WASPS IN THE BAG! THAT'S DEFINITELY A TRICK BAG!
Dick drops the bag to the ground, but the wasps have already been released. The fans in the front row screech and try to get away from the rampaging wasps, but fortunately most of the angry wasps flew directly up to Drizzle's face, and they begin stinging him in unison! Dick Drizzle cries out in pain as he tries to wave the wasps away from his face. Centurion backs up to the opposite side of the ring as he watches Dick's face swell tremendously.
TODD: That's a lot of wasps!
GATOR: Everyone in the front row is getting stung tonight! Happy Halloween!
Dick keeps swatting away the wasps stinging his face as he runs around aimlessly outside the ring. Eventually, Dick Drizzle rolls under the ring, swatting away the last of the wasps. When Dick finally rises to his feet inside the ring, it's clear that his face is puffy and red. Centurion, noting that the remaining wasps have now been left stingerless, charges at Dick Drizzle. "The Natural" lashes out at the XWF legend with a wild punch, but Centurion ducks it before grabbing Dick's arm and throwing him to the mat with an arm drag. Instead of letting go of the arm upon impact, however, Centurion smoothly transitions it into an armbar! Dick Drizzle starts screaming in pain as Centurion cranks on his arm!
TODD: Centurion is going to break his arm!
GATOR: "The Natural" Dick Drizzle has been getting under Centurion's skin for weeks now! Drizzle should never have poked the bear if he wasn't ready for something like this!
Centurion cranks and cranks and cranks on Dick's arm, but Drizzle just won't give up! Eventually, Centurion tires of the submission hold and relents. Dick rolls away, holding his arm in pain. That's when Centurion decides to exit the ring for the first time this match, lifting up the ring apron and pulling out a goody bag of his own. Centurion grabs an orange bag with the image of a black witch's hat sewn onto the bag.
TODD: Now Centurion is grabbing a goody bag! Let's see what he gets!
Centurion reaches into the orange bag....and pulls out FREDDY KRUEGER'S GLOVE!
Centurion looks very uneasy with the nightmarish weapon.
GATOR: That glove looks like it could do some serious damage!
TODD: But Centurion doesn't seem too fond of it for some reason!
GATOR: Probably because he's BORING!
Centurion holds the Kruger glove in his hand, inspecting it closely with a frown on his face. Instead of placing the murderous glove on his own hand, Centurion walks over to the front row of the crowd and hands the glove to a young child in the front row wearing an old-school XWF Anarchy shirt.
GATOR: He's giving the glove to a young bruv! What a nice lad!
TODD: That...might not end well. Should children really be playing with toys like that?
GATOR: That's not a toy...it's an XWF souvenir!
Centurion is about to turn around after handing the child the deadly weapon as a gift...but then the child turns around with the glove and starts stabbing their son-of-a-bitch step dad! It's getting bloody, and Centurion is horrified on what he just unleashed on the world!
TODD: Oh....oh god!
The little gremlin stabs another bystander in the gut with the glove before the security guards begin to move in, tackling the child with tremendous force! Centurion backs away from the fans, holding his hands up innocently as he watches the child's step-father bleed on the floor. As Centurion backs up he bumps the ring with his backside...where Dick Drizzle is waiting for him!
TODD: Centurion, turn around!
Dick reaches down and grabs Centurion by the hair, pulling him up off his feet as he digs his claws into Centurion's scalp. Eventually, Centurion is able to pull away from Dick, albeit with less hair on his head than before. Dick Drizzle slides out of the ring as he continues his attack on Centurion. The two begin trading blows outside the ring, going punch for punch right in front of the very same fans who just witnessed an attempted homicide at the ringside!
Eventually, Centurion is able to grab an upperhand in the exchange. When Dick Drizzle falls back onto the ringside barrier, Centurion grabs Dick by the face before slamming it right into the barrier! Drizzle falls down to the mats outside the ring, and Centurion once again heads under the ring to grab a goody bag. Centurion shakes his head before pulling out a small green bag with the image of a skull sewn onto it.
TODD: Centurion has pulled out another goody bag!
Centurion sighs softly and prays for good fortune as he opens the small green goody bag.....before smirking. Centurion empties out the contents of the bag right next to Dick Drizzle's body....IT'S THUMBTACKS!
GATOR: Centurion has pulled the thumbtacks out!
TODD: This match is about to get bloody!
Centurion stands over the downed Dick Drizzle, guiding him back to his feet.
As he prepares to deliver the final blow—Dick Drizzle clutches his chest and winces in pain!
GATOR: "Wait a minute, something's not right here, Todd!"
TODD: "Dick Drizzle looks like he's in serious distress!"
The Corpus Christi crowd falls silent as they witness the alarming scene unfolding before their eyes.
Centurion, suddenly concerned for his opponent's well-being, hesitates for a moment.
Drizzle's breathing becomes labored as he clutches his chest tighter, his face contorting in agony.
GATOR: It looks like Dick Drizzle is in real trouble, Todd!
TODD: This is baaaad! We need medical attention out here!
Suddenly, Dick Drizzle's eyes widen, and he desperately reaches out, poking Centurion in the eye with all his remaining strength.
Dick Drizzle drops to all fours as Centurion stumbles back, clutching his eye in pain as the fans gasp, then cheer at the unexpected twist.
GATOR: Dick Drizzle, despite the pain, finds a way to fight back against two opponents–Centurion AND Death!
TODD: Are we sure he wasn't faking!?!
Seizing the opportunity, Dick Drizzle summons his last reserves of energy.
With a determined look on his face, he crawls toward Centurion, who's still reeling from the eye poke.
GATOR: Dick Drizzle is going for it, Todd!
TODD: He's defying the odds! This could be his moment!
Centurion forcefully stomps on Dick's fingers and then seizes him by the nape of his neck, hoisting Dick Drizzle high into the air!
With a mighty display of strength, Centurion executes the 1000 Mile Slam, sending Drizzle's battered body crashing forcefully onto the bed of sharp tacks below!
There's no sound of agony from Drizzle upon impact; he appears to be completely unconscious... or DEAD!
Nonetheless, dozens upon dozens of thumb tacks stick into Drizzle's mostly exposed body, causing blood to leak out all over his increasingly grey skin.
GATOR: That could be the end of it right here!
Centurion rolls "The Natural" Dick Drizzle into the ring as he makes the pin.
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
WINNER VIA PINFALL - CENTURION
TODD: Ladies and gentlemen, we've witnessed a brutal encounter here tonight, but it seems the aftermath is even more concerning!
GATOR: THAT, my friends, is why you don't piss off the legends!
As the final bell rings, signaling Centurion's victory, the arena fills with a mix of cheers and gasps from the audience. Dick Drizzle lies motionless on the mat, his skin taking on an unsettling grey hue.
TODD: Well, Gator, I understand the competitive spirit in the ring, but let's not forget that Dick Drizzle is in a bad way right now. This isn't the time for that kind of comment.
Centurion, victorious but clearly concerned for his fallen opponent, stands in the ring as the medical personnel rush out to attend to Dick Drizzle.
GATOR: He 'fucked around and found out', that's all I'm saying! Hopefully he'll be fine. XWF have great medical!"
TODD: Since when!?
The medical team work swift but carefully, removing the thumb tacks that have embedded themselves into Dick Drizzle's battered body.
They place him onto a stretcher, securing him for the trip backstage. Centurion steps aside, allowing the professionals to tend to his injured opponent.
TODD: This is a somber moment, folks. Despite the fierce competition we witness in the XWF, these athletes put their bodies on the line each time they step into that ring.
GATOR: You're right, Todd. We may have our differences and rivalries, but we always hope for the safety and well-being of everyone in that squared circle—NOW ONTO OUR MAIN EVENT!.
GATOR: Ladies and gentlemen, we've got an incredible main event lined up for you tonight! The Anarchy Championship is on the line, and this match promises to be an absolute barnburner!
TODD: That's right, Gator! We've got the reigning champion, EDWARD, putting his Anarchy Championship on the line against a formidable challenger in Mastermind. This one has 'classic' written all over it!
GATOR: You said it, Todd! EDWARD has been on an absolute tear since capturing the Anarchy Championship back in May. He's been defending that title with everything he's got, and tonight is no exception.
TODD: But let's not forget about Mastermind. He's been on an impressive three-match winning streak, earning himself the opportunity to challenge for the Anarchy Championship. He's hungry for gold, and he's proven he's a force to be reckoned with.
GATOR: Absolutely, Todd! This is a classic clash of the unstoppable force meeting the immovable object. EDWARD's raw power against Mastermind's cunning and strategy. I can't wait to see how this one unfolds!
TODD: Neither can I, Gator. It's the main event we've all been waiting for, and it's coming up next!
DING!
The commentary audio suddenly cuts out as A red glowing ghost of a dude appears before EDWARD and Mastermind.
DUDE: Well Mastermind and Edward are ready to do battle for the Anarchy Championship here in the engine room of a decommissioned aircraft carrier, Guy!
Simultaneously, a glowing white ghost of a guy materializes beside him.
GUY: My dude, but why?
Edward and Mastermind, both seemingly unfazed by the supernatural occurrences around them, engage in a fierce lock-up in the heart of the haunted engine room. Mastermind presses the advantage and sets in a hammerlock!
DUDE: Mastermind isn’t just trying to master Edward’s mind here, he’s mastering the hammerlock!
Mastermind applies pressure, causing Edward to wince in pain.
GUY: That’s right, Dude!
Edward, however, is not one to be easily subdued. Channeling his inner caveman warrior spirit, he reaches out and grabs a nearby broom handle. In a swift, brutal motion, he swings it backward over his head, delivering a thunderous strike, cracking Mastermind!
GUY: Dude, that had to hurt!
DUDE: You’re right, my guy!
Mastermind stumbles back, momentarily stunned by the blow, but he doesn't lose his composure. With a keen eye for weaponry, he locates a hefty wrench nearby and seizes it. With calculated precision, Mastermind swings the wrench at Edward, who dodges!
DUDE: One shot with that wrench, guy, and homey is done!
Just then, a glowing green ghost appears in the midst of the spectral chaos.
HOMEY: No shit, I got hit by that wrench when I was alive!
GUY: Sup, homey.
Edward, though momentarily bewildered by the supernatural intervention, continues to defend himself as he swings the broom handle, but Mastermind adeptly dodges the blow, raising the wrench to counterattack. He slams the huge wrench down on Edward’s bare foot! Edward yelps in pain and hops, clutching his injured foot!
HOMEY: Mastermind with an OSHA violation to Edward!
GUY: I don’t know, homey, Edward was the one without proper footwear!
DUDE: Don’t be like that to my homey, guy, he was in the moment.
Right this very moment, Mastermind puts the wrench around Edward’s very strong bicep, and sets in a hammerlock with a wrench! He wrenches the hammerlock and hammers the wrench with his other hand!
DUDE: Mastermind using everything in his toolbox here tonight!
HOMEY: You’re right, dude!
GUY: Mastermind proving he is not Edward’s friend!
A glowing blue ghost appears.
FRIEND: Yo, guy.
GUY: Welcome, friend.
Edward, with his back against the wall and his foot throbbing in pain, manages to summon his inner strength. With a sudden burst of energy, he powers out of the assisted hammerlock! He quickly retaliates with a back elbow to Mastermind's face. Edward spins and swings the broomstick at Mastermind! Mastermind parries with the wrench! The broomstick breaks! Mastermind laughs at Edward! Edward bops Mastermind on the noggin with the broken broomstick! Mastermind drops the wrench, which lands on Edward’s foot!
FRIEND: Somebody call OSHA.
DUDE: Listen, friend, we already made that line!
FRIEND: My bad, dude, I wasn’t here.
Mastermind backs away, holding his forehead as Edward again holds his foot in anguish. Mastermind turns to Edward, who leaps with a standing dropkick to Mastermind! Mastermind spins and crashes into solid steel pump handle! Edward charges in, but Mastermind steps aside, letting Edward crash headfirst into the pump handle! Mastermind follows up with a pump handle slam!
FRIEND: Pump handles all over this match!
HOMEY: That’s right, friend, all the pump handles!
GUY: Homey, please!
Edward slumps over the pipes that are holding the pump handle! Mastermind finds a metal bucket! Mastermind with a shot to the ribs from the bucket!
DUDE: Guy, that man just hit him with that bucket!
GUY: I saw it, dude!
HOMEY: Who left that bucket here? Did they bring a bucket?
FRIEND: Who knows how they got that pail!
A glowing purple ghost appears.
PAL: You asked for me?
DUDE: No, pal. We said pail.
PAL: Oh.
Is it, um…
…cool if I stick around?
GUY: No, get out of here, pal!
PAL: Oh.
…well…
…too bad, I don’t have a ride.
Mastermind goes for the ribs again, but Edward catches the bucket! He yanks it from Mastermind! Edward places the bucket over Mastermind’s head!
As EDWARD and Mastermind trade blows, the commentary team suddenly interrupts the action with an urgent update.
GATOR: Wait a minute, Todd! We've got some breaking news from backstage! Our medical team has successfully resuscitated Dick Drizzle, and he's currently en route to the nearest hospital!
The camera cuts to a brief backstage scene showing medical personnel rushing a still-unconscious, but no longer grey hued Dick Drizzle into an ambulance.
TODD: That's a relief, Gator. We were all holding our breath after that brutal match earlier. Our thoughts are with Dick Drizzle for a speedy recovery.
GATOR: See, Todd. I told you that the XWF medical team was top-notch, now back to the action!
Edward picks up a set of drum sticks!
GUY: Dude, where the hell did those come from?
PAL: Upstairs.
HOMEY: Hey, pal, you just cut dude off!
Edward starts beating away on the bucket like he’s auditioning for Stomp! Edward then stomps Mastermind’s foot as a bass pedal! Mastermind swings wildly at Edward but the bucket is still blocking his view! Edward catches Mastermind and delivers a back drop suplex to Mastermind! Edward with a pin! A spectral referee appears and makes the count!
1…
2…
GUY: Mastermind kicks out at the last second!
FRIEND: That’s right, guy!
Edward sets in a chinlock! Mastermind peels the bucket from his head! He looks anguished! Mastermind fights out of the chinlock! HE TUCKS HIS CHIN MAKING HIM IMPERVIOUS TO CHINLOCKS! Mastermind mounts Edward from behind! Mastermind punches Edward in the back of his head!
PAL: Donkey Punch onto Edward!
GUY: Why are you even?
Edward pivots and bridges, getting Mastermind off of him! Edward kips up as Mastermind stands!
HOMEY: Mastermind with a huge clothesline, dude!
DUDE: Edward is knocked back, and slams into a wall, guy!
FRIEND: Man, what a contest!
MAN: I was wondering when you were going to get to me.
GUY: What’s up, man?
MAN: Not much, my guy! Mastermind rushes in with a follow up, throwing a haymaker!
PAL: Edward slides out of the way at the last second, and Mastermind punches the solid wall of the engine room!
Steve Sayors runs into the room, dressed like a Ghostbuster! He pulls out his Proton Pack and aims! He zaps all the ghosts and busts them into a trap!
STEVE SAYORS: Edward hooks Mastermind, huge German suplex! No! Mastermind flips out and lands on his feet!
GATOR: Well, folks, it looks like our ghostly interruptions have been dealt with. We can finally get back to calling the action!
TODD: Absolutely, Gator. Edward and Mastermind have been going at it tooth and nail in this Haunted Havoc match, but you have to believe it's coming to a close. How long can they keep up this pace!?
EDWARD and Mastermind exchange brutal blows, both fighters showing tremendous resilience. The Anarchy Championship hangs in the balance, and neither competitor is willing to back down.
GATOR: These two are giving it their all, Todd! It's a war for that coveted Anarchy Championship!
TODD: But who will emerge victorious, Gator? The suspense is killing me!
Mastermind, known for his cunning tactics and mastery of the Sleeper Hold, seized the opportunity to gain the upper hand. He locked his powerful arms around EDWARD's neck, applying the Mind Sleeper with expert precision.
GATOR: Mastermind has the Mind Sleeper locked in tight, Todd! EDWARD is in real trouble now!
TODD: This could be the moment Mastermind's been waiting for. If he can put EDWARD to sleep, he'll become the new Anarchy Champion!
EDWARD's strength and resilience had brought him this far, but the Mind Sleeper was a formidable submission hold that had taken down many opponents. The pressure on his carotid artery and jugular vein threatened to cut off the flow of oxygen to his brain, and it seemed like Mastermind had found the perfect moment to put an end to the match.
GATOR: EDWARD's in dire straits, Todd. The longer he's trapped in that Sleeper Hold, the closer he gets to losing consciousness.
TODD: But look at him, Gator! He's refusing to give in! There's an incredible display of determination here.
However, just when it seemed like Mastermind had the advantage firmly in his grasp, EDWARD summoned his primal instincts and a burst of adrenaline.
With a determined roar, he planted his feet firmly on the ground, refusing to let the Sleeper Hold take him down.
TODD: It's like he's tapped into some primal reserve of strength that was frozen away throughout this match. Mastermind might be in trouble now!
EDWARD's brute strength allowed him to slowly rise to his feet, Mastermind still clinging desperately to the Mind Sleeper. EDWARD's face turned beet red from the lack of oxygen, but he wouldn't give up.
GATOR: This is the heart of a warrior, Todd! EDWARD refuses to quit!
With a sudden burst of power, EDWARD flipped MAstermind off of his back and lifted him off the ground, holding him high above his head, and then executing the CAVEMAN SLAM!
GATOR: The CAVEMAN SLAM! What a counter!
The entire USS LEXINGTON seemed to shake as Mastermind crashed down onto the unforgiving steel below. The impact was thunderous, and echoed thorough out the engine room.
TODD: That has to be it, Gator! Mastermind took a colossal slam!
EDWARD, gasping for air but fueled by sheer determination, rolled over and hooked Mastermind's leg for the pin. The referee slid into position, and the count began.
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
WINNER AND STILL ANARCHY CHAMPION - EDWARD!!!
TODD: He did it! EDWARD has done it! What a battle, what a victory!
B.O.B. D washes up onto land, Xtreme Title still in tow. He coughs up a bunch of water, and damn near a lung, before turning towards the camera and speaking.
"I gotta give ya credit, Oz, I thought this would be my easiest Title defense yet, and it ended up being the HARDEST. Props, you earned the right to drag me into the sea tonight."
D picks his belt out of the sand and holds it up, an intense look on his face.
"That's one for Anarchy, one for pay-per-view, and one for Warfare; whether they think they're gonna give me credit for it or not, the fact of the matter IS I did technically have a successful Title Defense when TK got me and Bobby DQed some odd weeks back. So, as far as I'm concerned, two more Warfares and one more pay-per-view until I get my briefcase..........."
B.O.B. D disappears into the night knowing he's that much closer.
The following 2 users Like B.O.B. D's post:2 users Like B.O.B. D's post (10-28-2023), Mr. Oz (10-27-2023)
XWF FanBase: The IWC (gets varying reactions in the arenas, but will be worshiped like a god and defended until the end by internet fans; literally has thousands of online dorks logging on to complain anytime they lose a match or don't get pushed right)
(10-27-2023, 01:32 PM)B.O.B. D Said: B.O.B. D washes up onto land, Xtreme Title still in tow. He coughs up a bunch of water, and damn near a lung, before turning towards the camera and speaking.
"I gotta give ya credit, Oz, I thought this would be my easiest Title defense yet, and it ended up being the HARDEST. Props, you earned the right to drag me into the sea tonight."
D picks his belt out of the sand and holds it up, an intense look on his face.
"That's one for Anarchy, one for pay-per-view, and one for Warfare; whether they think they're gonna give me credit for it or not, the fact of the matter IS I did technically have a successful Title Defense when TK got me and Bobby DQed some odd weeks back. So, as far as I'm concerned, two more Warfares and one more pay-per-view until I get my briefcase..........."
B.O.B. D disappears into the night knowing he's that much closer.
Oz is seen a couple miles away from D, as he pulls out a triple baggied zipped up, and pulls out his fancy cellphone. As the call finishes, he sees his interdimensional camera appear before him, and follows him as a blue rip in the space near him opens and he walks through, followed by the camera as he looks around, seeing the scientists he's hired, then walking to the break room and enjoying a cup of coffee to warm up after dropping into the cold depths of the sea. As he sits there, damp everywhere, phone placed on the counter next to the machine, as he watches the post-match 'interview' D put out just minutes prior. His camera swirled around him, and he'd respond.
"D, you were a tough opponent, but what would I expect from a Bastardly brother? It's as if I fought TK or Bobby. Neither of us wanted to give up the win, and it showed.
Good job, D."
The following 2 users Like Mr. Oz's post:2 users Like Mr. Oz's post (10-28-2023), B.O.B. D (10-27-2023)
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