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Saved by the Bell: The Old Class
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Corey Smith Offline
Active in XWF



XWF FanBase:
Some of everyone

(cheered; very rarely plays dirty but isn't lame either; many likable qualities)


#1
02-20-2022, 05:31 PM

A scourge has set upon the XWF land!

But it is no Exile, no Apex, no man with no name!

Not even a particularly screechy, unselfaware ghost!

And yet it has caused mighty stars to fall from their place in the heavens.

What is it?

….

….

….

….

BULLYING!

Yes, BULLYING!

But, praise be to GOD, three intrepid souls seek to get to the heart of the problem!

But to do that, they must venture into a very nexus of bullying itself.

High School.


The shot opens on our three heroes as they stare deep into the abyss.

[Image: SHSD%20JrSR%20HighSchool%20Hallways.JPG]


The corridor is full of students milling about as their day begins. New dramas unfold. Kisses are stolen. High fives are meted out. And all the while Corey Smith, Thaddeus Duke, and Mark Flynn are watching it unfold. They’re all dressed very casually, like a modern high school student. Thad’s even wearing glasses as a disguise like he’s Clark fucking Kent. And well, Flynn doesn’t seem to have gotten with the program as much as Thad or Corey, because he’s actually wearing a Mark Flynn t-shirt.

Dude, you are SO gonna blow our cover!

Mark quirks an eyebrow and looks up from his phone irritably. Cover?

Yeah! We’re supposed to be masquerading as high school students so we can figure out what bullying is so we can stop it from spreading in the XWF. We came up with aliases, remember?

Alias? Mark snorts. Oh, I got his ass sorted!

No, no! Thad throws his arms out and then points to each of them in turn as he names them off. Corey is “Ben”, I’m “Tom” and you’re “Bryan”. Remember?

Hmmm. Exposition. Mark slides his phone into his pocket and confidently states, I just don’t see the point.

Corey snaps his fingers and points at Mark. You know what, it’s perfect! You can be the angsty one!

Well, whatever the case we’re sticking out like sore thumbs. People are staring at us, we need to mingle or something!

Corey draws in a deep breath. Alright. I’m ready!

And with that, they wade into the student body. Thad gives out a couple confident nods. Mark looks pretty disinterested. And Corey? Well….

Hello, fellow kids! Corey announces jubilantly. Don’t mind me… he pulls out his own cell phone, I’m just listening to Drake on my very, VERY expensive cell phone. Corey suddenly gets uncomfortably close to a female student, who visibly flinches from his presence. What’s your favorite Drake song? Mine is…

Thad takes a firm grasp of Corey’s hoodie and drags him away. Speaking of blowing cover. You are trying way too hard! He hisses, casting furtive glances about.

I’m just trying to fit in!

How are you so bad at this?

Look, when you spend most of your formative teen years on nonstop drug benders and getting taken over by a karate lady A.I., let’s see how well YOU do.

I…Thad cants his head. That’s fair. Then, looking around. Where’s Mark?

The shot cuts over to Flynn, who’s leaning against a locker, again with his face buried in his phone watching clips of Alias matches and studying them intently. A number of students have formed a semicircle around him.

Corey wrings his hands. Oh geez, I think Mark’s about to get bullied.

But then, one of the students comments. Nice shirt! Retro wrestling gear is pretty hot right now.

Ya huh. Mark barely intones, never looking up from his phone.

So what’s your name? I’ve never seen you around before. Another student asks.

Mark. Then, looking up to lock eyes with a very irritated Thad. Flynn rolls his eyes. “Bryan”.

Mark-Bryan? That’s a pretty cool name.

Yeah. Flynn responds noncommittally.

The group of teens continue hanging on his every, albeit few, words as Corey and Thad look on in astonishment.

How is he doing that?

Thad shrugs. I dunno, man.

Plus, he’s like 50.

He’s not 50.

He’s close enough.

Just then, a couple of the female students that were hanging about Flynn approach Corey and Thad.

Hey, so like, is your friend Mark-Bryan single?

Yeah, he’s super hot.

Corey’s jaw literally drops. Soooo, you don’t sense anything off about him. Like, at all?

The girls look at each other, then back at Corey. Thad subtly nudges Corey to stop, but the girls don’t seem to notice. I don’t think so. I mean, he does give off this cool vibe like he’s an old soul, ya know? Like he’s been around. Seen things. Experienced things.

Well I know he has to experience a prostate exam every year. A much, much harder nudge from Thad.

…huh?

You’re so weird, new kid.

Heh. So, like “quirky cute weird” or “forever virgin weird”?

The second one. Both girls reply in unison and walk off, leaving behind a flabbergasted Corey. He sets in plantinively on Thad. I’m not a virgin! I’m not even close to being a virgin! I’m practically a ho!

Thad smirks and chuckles, Oooohhhh ‘kay, lets not get ahead of ourselves. You still take a backseat to me.

The metaphorical dick measuring is interrupted by the sound of a bell chiming. The masses of students begin to swell in the direction of their next class assignments. Corey and Thad both take out their schedules.

We got Algebra first period and then history second period.

I love history!

And that’s why you’re a forever virgin. Thad whistles in Mark’s direction. Bryan, lets go, we’re going to be late.

Nearly looking relieved, Flynn disengages from the students surrounding him. I would say it’s been a pleasure, but I’d be lying. He joins up with Corey and Thad and they make their way to….

2nd Period-History


The room is your standard history classroom. Walls adorned with various maps and posters of factoids. Desks aligned in neat conformity encouraging rows. Thad is seated behind Corey, who naturally selected the front row. Mark is seated just behind Thad.

At the front of the class a man’s back is turned. He’s writing something on the dry erase board.

“Greetings class, my name is John History.” Upon completing his work, the teacher turns around to reveal….

North Korean War Criminal?! Corey blurts out, catching his words too late by slapping his palms to his lips.

Hey hey, what’s up man? Flynn gestures to NK.

Greetings student whose identity is unknown to me. And welcome to U.S. History. I am your substitute teacher.

What is he doing here?! Thad leans over to hiss in Corey’s ear.

Excuse me young man! I will not have any talking out of turn! NK scolds, picking up a pointer stick and waving it theatrically. Now, some of you may be assuming that because I’m a substitute this period will be an extra study hall. Or even one of those classes where the teacher puts in a movie and takes a nap. Well I am glad to inform you that I care about your respective educations way too much to allow any such kind of foolishness.

*Collective groans from the class*

So today, we will be discussing the topic of Jim Crow era legislation and its impact on the African American population. Don’t bother opening your textbooks, your district has already banned Critical Race Theory so it won’t be in there.

Something thumps off Corey’s shoulder. He reaches down and withdraws a crumpled up piece of paper. It just says “Nerd” with an arrow pointing at the reader. I am not! Corey whispers, scanning the class for signs of a culprit. And then, Corey starts. Oh my God, am I getting bullied?

A dolorous boom sounds from the front of the class. NK has slammed his pointer stick against the side of a metal cabinet, and he’s now waving it at Corey. I will demand your full attention!

Y-yes, yes sir!

Assssss kisser.

Dipshit.

The insults sound out rapid fire and somehow beneath NK’s audio range. Corey again scans the class but can’t make out who said it. Corey goes to turn around to tell Thad, but catches NK’s eye and thinks better of it. And that’s when he’s hit with yet another wadded up ball of paper. He retrieves that one as well and opens it up.

[Image: 8f1.gif]


Young man! NK’s voice booms out authoritatively. Are you passing notes?

It takes Corey a moment to realize he’s the young man in question. He hastily crumples the paper up again and quickly replies No! Someone threw this at me!

Snide laughter could be heard percolating in the rows as NK approached Corey’s desk. Well, perhaps you’d like to share this vitally important document with the class, hmmmm?

I’d really rather not.

Without further word, NK reaches down and snatches the wadded up paper from Corey.

Mr. North uh History, sir, I guarantee you that isn’t worth your time.

I’ll be the judge of that! He unfurls the paper and studies it for a series of awkward protracted seconds. His face scrunches up as he considers what he’s seeing. Finally, he barks out, Crude! Uninspired! Talentless! I give it a failing grade! He rewads the paper and deftly tosses it into the trash can. Now if I can continue? He doesn’t wait for an assent before proceeding with the lesson.


Special Period-A.V. Class


This class is sparsely populated at best, being little more than our heroes and a few other, to put not so fine a point on it, dorks. One of the aforementioned dorks is at the front of the room, reciting from a piece of paper. Sitting at the desk is…North Korean War Criminal. Just behind his head he’s written “Greetings class, my name is John R. Audiovisual”.

The student at the front of the room seems to be nervously reading a news article about budget cuts to the local fire department causing outrage in the wake of a tragic arson that burned down an old woman’s home, but only managed to kill one parakeet.

So…uh….that’s….uh….my oral presentation exam. The teen’s voice is reedy and still experiencing the crackles of pubescence.

NK seems to study the young man for a moment, which naturally does nothing to ease his tension. Finally, N.K. lifts a finger in the air and announces “FAIL!” The boy looks shattered. Your diction was sloppy, the tenor of your voice was utterly unengaging and the subject matter was completely unappealing!”

You literally just handed me this article to read.

You may take your seat!

The boy hangs his head and returns to his seat.

Okay, next up we have Ben. Remember Ben: flare, savoir faire! This is for television!

Yeah…yeah….I’m aware.

“Ben” walks up to the front of the class, and the camera’s eye squares up on him, but too close at first as though its being operated by an amateur. Because it is. Sorry! A voice calls out from behind the camera as a proper shot is regained.

So, Denzel Porter invitational! Oh man, am I psyched! Slightly less psyched than when I mistakenly thought it was the Denzel Washington invitational, but pretty pumped nonetheless.

And, to be teaming with my good friend and friend of a friend who I can tolerate so long as I stay in my zen place, well, life is pretty good.

But, to top it all off, to be facing an “it” team if there ever was one, the controversial needle movers themselves The Exiles! Which features none other than XWF Universal Champion Peter Vaughn himself. Guys….guys. While I’m sure the Splatter title is a pretty big deal in certain circles, I’d say the bookers really screwed the pooch not making this the main event of night one. This screams money match. Well, most of it does anyway.

Like ya didn’t see that comin’?

Take note of how I specifically mentioned Peter Vaughn out of all three members of his team. And that would be because there is a massive yawning talent gulf between Peter and the rest of his team. More on that soon. Because first of all, I’m going to be uncharacteristically shallow and shit on Xavier Lux because his name makes me mad.

Xavier, I’m sure you’re not aware of this because you’re so far up your own ass you’ve got a cozy den in there, but the name Lux was an important name well before you ever set foot in the XWF. And before the history nerds call me out on it, yes there was a Lux LYDEN before there was a Lux, but I think it's safe to say the only Lux people remember is the former alternate ID of yours truly.

Xavier, my friend…my mentor…Lux…once occupied the same brain space as me. She literally lived inside my head. And while I realize that nowadays that may not even crack the top 10 strangest things in the XWF, suffice it to say Lux was a very important part of my life. She’s the reason I have the fighting skills I have today. She’s the reason I’m clean and sober. And she’s the reason I matured from a snotty, self centered, little egoist into the young man you see before you.

You sir, are no “Lux”.

Yeah, yeah, I know what it says on the marquee and on all the contracts. Let’s not devolve into pedantry. But Lux was only a consciousness residing in my twiggy teenage body and she was still five times the person you will ever be Xavier. Yeah, I see the championship history. Paradigm Champion. Path of Destiny Champion. “I’m a Super Special Boy And A Very Good Boy” World Championship.

Yes, I’m saying your title history sounds made up and dumb and definitely not as epic as being the super-Super-SUPER Continental Champion.

But hey, this is the XWF, right? So lets focus front and center. And front and center you have been less than impressive. Certainly less impressive than Peter. And hey, ya know what? Happens to a lot of guys and gals. They roll up in here with a carpet bag full of accolades from, uh, shall we say “less vigorous environs”, and hit that brick wall of truly difficult competition for the first time in their careers.

Your record so far is 2 wins 1 loss. And those wins were against XWF enhancement talent members Tommy Gunn and Calypso. And it was totally hilarious by the by how you tried to hype up CALYPSO in your promo spots Xavvie. Because no matter which way you slice it, that one was always gonna be a gimme. And aside from those three matches you’ve got some utterly cowardly ambushes and attacks to your name and in toto, we got an early impact that’s less “impact” and more “gentle tapping”.

In short, ya ain’t done shit yet. You have proven yourself to be comfortably mid card and haven’t even thrown your hat in for a shot at any titles. Way to grab life by the throat. You’d think that maybe some of Peter Vaughn’s balls may have rubbed off on youuuuuu….lol…..*ahem*, yeah, you’d think that maybe some of that would have rubbed off on you. But…I guess not?

Xavier, thus far you have proven yourself to be a mediocre man living long in the shadow cast by Peter Vaughn. And thus far, you seem more than content to be there. Whether that changes or not is up to you homey, but you certainly aren’t turning heads right now.

A pained pause ensues.

I don’t want to do this next one. I really don’t. For a couple different reasons. Number one, it’s Betsy Granger, a woman I’ve professed a great deal of respect for.

Number two, it’s Betsy Granger, a woman I’ve recently lost a great deal of respect for.

Betsy? What. The. Fuck.?

You used to be so much better than this. So much better than the bitch ass attacks. So much better than slumming it in this second rate invasion angle with a team mostly composed of guys that couldn’t punch through the glass ceiling with a chainsaw.

Did you just, like, get sick of being a decent person? Oh don’t you dare try to pull that “oh golly gee willikers, did I do that?” shit with me. Yes, bitch, you did. And yes, bitch, it makes you a bad person.

I can’t imagine trading in what you were, WILLINGLY, to become just another token bad guy existing in Peter Vaughn’s shadow. Although, on the other hand, I guess I can imagine it a little bit. And I never went here with you because honestly I just liked you. But now that you’ve opened the verbal floodgates on me here comes some mean troof, ya Becky.

Remember when I told Xavier about how it’s commonplace for people that were totally baller elsewhere to run into a brick wall here? Yeah, well, that applies to you too. You’re another one that was a bigass deal in other circles. But here? You’ve been here how long and the best you’ve done is a month long TV title reign and a Shooting Star reign that according to official XWF number crunchers lasted “negative 25 days”. I know, I know it's a mistake but it's still funny as shit. Like, you’re such a nonentity here the powers that be can’t even be arsed to keep the length of your title reigns straight.

And why bother? With your record here it's always been obvious you would never be another Alias. You’re in the same “comfortably middle mid-card” lane as ya boy Xavier. Acceptable, but hardly setting the world on fire.

Which brings us to this match. You and your ilk staring down the barrel of the gun that is three unquestionably top tier members of the roster. Guys who are all multiple title holders. Guys who have experience winning those big money XWF events. How did YOUR team do at War Games, eh? And while maybe Vaughn can hang, I don’t think there is a single soul in the back or watching from home who thinks YOU can hang in this match. You’re just not at that level, and you’ve proven it time and time again.

Corey then mimes a drumroll before hitting an invisible cymbal.

And last, but not least we have “the man of the hour” Peter Vaughn. Hey Pete. We got no history but I feel like I just know you. Like I got you buried deep in my bones. I’m sure you think you’re untouchable, but I’m about to show you that you’re very, very touchable.

Ahhh…ermmm….right.

I mean, here is the man who just beat Jim fucking Caedus for the Universal Championship. And unlike just about every other Universal Champ since the dawn of time, he didn’t need a 24/7 briefcase to do it! Still love ya lots Alias, please don’t eat me.

Wow. Wow.

Seems like a pretty big fuckin’ deal, right?

But just WHO did you beat, Peter? Or maybe it’s more appropriate to say, WHAT did you beat? Because from where I’m standing, it sure as hell wasn’t a Universal Champion at the top of his game. We all saw Jim Caedus coming apart at the seams in real time. Responding to every attack like a blustering psychotic. Insisting an ambush attack on him and Lycana didn’t actually happen when it was literally filmed on camera for all to see. And he thought that doing all that made HIM look like the STRONG one. Like he was saving face every time he unleashed another schizophrenic word salad on us every time somebody said something mean to him. And that? That’s the big man on campus you beat for the Universal Championship. A man who is well noted for cracking under pressure. He did it against the Engineer and now he did it with you too. Pete, you didn’t beat a world class athlete. You beat the unmedicated.

But oh…oh, those wins! Right? My man racked up an impressive 4-1 record on his way to the Universal championship. Yeah, impressive until you look at it for like five fucking seconds. Because homeboy beat a gorilla with a tranq gun, beat Drew Archyle only because Xavier Lux interfered, and then beat Barney Green and Tommy Wish clean.

Oh, and that loss? Heh heh…funny you should ask.

It was to Mark Flynn. The very SAME Mark Flynn who is present on this team. So put that in your pipe and smoke it janitor man!

So what we have here is a guy whose record looks pretty good on paper but quickly falls apart under scrutiny. The fact is that in Peter’s admittedly quick run to the top, he has yet to have that career defining win that cements his status as an immortal. And yeah, granted, the guy’s only been here a few months. But the flip side of that is yeah, the guy’s only been here a few months. Because Universal Champion he may be, he may also be the least tenured, least experienced XWF Universal Champion in history. And of course, of course, Peter has won the big belt in other promotions. But as I’ve already said, ain’t nuthin’ compares to the XWF for sheer level of competition, ultra-violence, and insanity. Peter Vaughn has captured the Universal Championship, but his actual level of experience in the XWF is nil. Which, to my mind, may make him one of the weakest Universal Champions yet. Which is gonna be a big, big problem soon, considering that a certain nameless freight train is barreling towards him at breakneck speed.

Hoooo daddy, Alias is ON HIS WAY. And Peter, poor unprepared, silver spoon in the mouth, Peter? He’s gonna get ROCKED. Because nothing he’s faced yet, in the XWF or elsewhere, has prepared him for ALIAS. Peter, are you aware that that man is practically undefeated? He’s fucking INHUMAN, my mans! He’s made the legendary Doc D’Ville and Unknown Soldier his bitch! And the only reason…the only reason he lost the Universal Championship in the first place was because of YOUR fuckery! And that’s comin’ right round to bite you in the ass.

Pete, you're gonna lose that match, and your Universal title reign is going to end up being one of the paltriest in XWF history. So, considering that looming catastrophic failure, what you do NOW is actually pretty damn important. It’s the difference between just being another body to get bodied by Alias, or showing your belly to the world and proving you weren’t REALLY ready for the XWF. Are you connecting the dots, Pete?

You need a W here.

You NEED it. Because this is by far your biggest challenge to date. Not the gorilla. Not Jim Caedus with brain worms. It…is….US! And if you want an iota of a chance of saving face right before you lose to Alias, ya gotta win it here. But no pressure, right? Heh. Right.

Final point. I think there’s something to be said about a man who fails to surround himself with equals. Granger, Lux, and Miller….they’re not your equals. You know that. I think THEY know that. And that’s precisely why you brought them to the dance as your perennially non-threatening heavies. You have nothing to fear from them. But you have nothing to learn from them either. And that’s what a proper team needs. Equal footing. It’s how you get the world to truly take you seriously, and it’s how you grow and advance as a unit. But you don’t care about growth, do you Peter? Not as a team, at least. Nah. Because you were ALWAYS gonna be the star and your B-team flunkies were going to be the gormless dupes to put you there.

So, my final words are a question for Betsy, Xavier, and Bam. Are YOU content carrying water for Peter Vaughn? Or do you want something MORE. Something to consider, eh?


Corey turns to NK.

So how did I do, ‘teach?

NK narrows his eyes, musing. Finally, he offers his opinion. A solid B minus effort, Ben.

B minus?!

Yes. You neglected to mention that the startlingly handsome and ruthlessly effective North Korean War Criminal also beat Betsy Granger.

But you, I mean, HE isn’t even in the match!

B. Minus.

Corey sighs. Fiiiiiiine. He takes his seat.

Now if you’ll excuse me I have some…business...to take care of. Please, in my absence, study the complete speeches of American president Abraham Lincoln!

*Collective groans from the class*

With that, NK slinks out of the classroom. He walks down the hall until he reaches an unused band room. Fishing in his pocket for a key ring, he unlocks the door and turns on the lights to reveal a number of bound people! When the light turns on, most of them start murmuring or trying to shout past their gags. NK quickly closes the door behind them.

Shhh! SHHHHH! I’m just coming to ensure none of you have spontaneously expired. You’re all still alive. He speaks the words with a cadence that leaves you unsure if he thinks that’s a good thing or a bad thing. Rest assured, your students are in capable hands. More than capable! I will offer them an education your capitalist for profit institution never could!

One of the teachers, who somehow managed to get most of the tape around his mouth removed, replies, But we’re a public school!

Ach! NK rushes over to the teacher and reattaches the duct tape. And then, he goes back to the door. Now everyone just relax and focus on how much better educated your pupils will be under my tutelage. Then, as an afterthought. I’ll return with some juice boxes later. He then shuts the light off and resecures the door behind him.

[Image: CoreySig6A.png?width=270&height=406]
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(02-22-2022), Doctor Louis D'Ville (02-21-2022), Dolly Waters (04-19-2022), Jay Omega (02-21-2022), Mark Flynn (02-20-2022), Raion Kido (02-21-2022), Thaddeus Duke (02-21-2022), Theo Pryce (02-20-2022)




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