Your television screen fires up with Them No Good Bastards inside TK's run-down trailer in Lima, Ohio. It's cold this time of year and having no front door doesn't help.

Why are we here, TK?

Shit, man. Tell you the damn truth. I like to come here to remember where the fuck I came from, ya know? Before this damn crazy life as a pro rassler. Would I trade it? Hell to the fuck no! Being Elon Musk rich is awesome! Plus, I need to pick something up.

What's that?

TK walks into the master bedroom and grabs a notebook. Bobby and Jimmy stay in the living room. Bobby begins looking around, where he sees at all of TK's criterion collection Blu-rays.

How is all your stuff still here, untouched, without a front door?

Jimmy plugs in an electric heater after unrolling some plastic to cover the doorway. Adjusting the electric heaters control settings, he answers for TK, assuming the master of the Thunder Strike was busy and not really listening.

Oh, man, no one in this trailer park would ever mess with Thunder Knuckles's stuff. How do you think he perfected the Thunder Strike?

Makes sense.

TK walks back into the kitchen, opens the refrigerator, and grabs a beer. He cracks it open and holds up his notebook. He seems happy about finding it. Bobby sees TK hold up the notebook and looks confused.

Did we come all this way for a single notebook?

Yeah, oh, and these.

TK pulls out a one-gallon ziplock bag of "Golden Teacher" magic mushrooms and holds them out to Bobby.

How about you take these fucking beauts, big guy. Me and Jimmy here, well, we are going on a little trip by ourselves. I say fuck it, man, you might as well go on a trip too.

Why don't I come with you? We can get into some Bastardly fun.

Bobby holds out his hand to accept the magic mushrooms.

That's okay, man. It's something I have to do alone. I got a goddamn meeting to attend.

TK smiles knowing those are some damn good mushrooms.

Well, might as well make the most of it, right?

Bobby dumps a fist full of magic mushrooms into his large hand, pops them into his mouth, and begins to chew.

See ya soon, bro.

You fucking know it, my brother. We have a lot more goddamn work to do.

TK and Bobby exchange a no-look fist bump. TK grabs his beer, downs it, and heads toward the plastic drape that is now his front door. Jimmy isn't too far behind.

Later, Bobby.

Take a lap, Jimmy.

Jimmy puts his head down, pulls over the plastic, and exits the trailer. TK walks over to Them No Good Bastards red stretch Hummer limo. Jimmy opens the back door and TK gets in. Jimmy is not far behind and closes the door.

I thought Bastards are the only ones who can drive the limo, Thunder Knuckles?

Never mind that shit for that now, Jimmy.

Wait... Is Charlie driving?

Jimmy starts to get out of the car by opening the door.

Sit the fuck down, Jimmy. Charlie will do fine.

Jimmy shuts the door and buckles up. He doesn't trust that Charlie has a driver's license let alone the keys to Them No Good Bastards' limo. TK presses a purple button located next to his seat that signals Charlie upfront to drive. Instead of immediately taking off Charlie rolls down the partition the separates the front from the back.

Are you sure this is where you want to go, Tee-Kay?

Well, yeah, that's the address I was fucking given.

One Seagate, Toledo, Ohio, alright. That seems out of place to me, but okay. One more question though.

What, Charlie? For fucks sake, we don't got all goddamn day.

Would you mind if Goldie drives?

What the Hell do you mean? Goldie is a goddamn belt. Last I checked, belts can't fucking drive!

Jimmy starts to go for the door again until TK glares at him, as if to say, "Go ahead, try it". Jimmy stops because he knows what will happen if he goes any farther.

Damn, man, just asking. You don't have to be so rude.

Charlie can be heard whispering to Goldie as he rolls up the partition.

Don't listen to him, babe, I know you can drive. Tee-Kay's just another asshole that doesn't understand our love.

Charlie begins the journey to the address written down for him. For most of the drive, however, TK is looking out the window thinking. Jimmy remains as quiet as he can but he is itching to get TK on the subjects that matter.

TK, some things you have to try to avoid going into your next match.

Jimmy braces for a firm smack across the face. The smack, however, doesn’t come. Jimmy continues cautiously.

Robert Main’s Dead Man’s Hand is an inverted Death Valley Driver. The move is executed by putting you in a rack position. He drops his opponents sideways, driving the opponent's head to the mat. It’s a highly dangerous move. You’re not able to roll with the natural momentum of the move to absorb the impact. You can become seriously hurt, Thunder Knuckles.

TK is still looking out the window. Jimmy’s not sure if TK is listening but he continues anyway.

The move was used by Kotetsu Yamamoto in the 70s. Kenta Kobashi used it too but called it the Burning Hammer. I got a hold of some tape of guys getting out of it. It’s relatively easy if you’re even halfway paying attention to your surroundings.

Jimmy pauses.... because TK hasn't said a word. He presses forward because TK hasn't hit him or told him to shut up this entire time. Which is unusual, to say the least.

Oh, man, I almost forgot! Mark Briscoe used it and renamed it too! He called it the "Cut-Throat Driver" and it's the same move just a little tweaked. He would instead hold the far arm of the opponent across his opponent’s own throat instead of holding the body of the opponent, then came the Inverted Death Valley Driver. Robert’s version isn’t nearly as inventive like I said. It’s more like Kenta’s and Yamamoto’s. DO NOT get yourself into a situation where Main can get you in it. I guess, if you do find yourself in that situation you could slip down his side and knee him in the balls, or something. I don’t know, get creative.

TK finally breaks his silence still looking out the limo’s window. Turns out he’s been listening to Jimmy this whole time and not complaining about Jimmy telling him as much as he can about Robert Main inside the ring. TK wants to know Robert’s every thought in this match with him. No corners cut.

Chris Page was able to avoid it for two of three nights of Relentless. I could give a fuck about a history lesson on his goddamn lame-ass move, Jimmy. The blueprint is already there. Work Robert down by attacking his shoulder and legs. He may think he has a high tolerance for pain but if you make a body part quit working. It doesn't matter what he can and can't fucking feel.

You also have to watch out he’s kind of a suplex master too.

TK quits looking out the limo’s window and slowly looks over to Jimmy.

Suplex master. Pffft. Fuck that, he can also gets over fucking aggressive. Which I'm goddamn counting on. If he makes mistakes in this match he's going to pay, no, if's, and's, or but's about it. That is the way of the Bastard.

TK cracks his first smirk since leaving Bobby Bourbon at the trailer.


[bwo]~Meanwhile~[/bwo]


The psilocybin mushrooms have taken full effect and now Bobby Bourbon is tripping balls. The sun has set. He’s sitting outside TK’s run-down trailer in Lima, Ohio. The Christmas lights in the trailer park are still up from last year and on. The lights are like beacons dancing in Bobby’s eyes. Bobby smiles as he heads towards the most lavish of all the white trash outdoors Christmas decorations. A giant blow-up grinch, slightly off-color, and held together by a bad duct tape job. Bobby's smile is unrivaled at this point until a gust of wind blows the Grinch's hand, which causes the inflatable arm to smack Bobby in the face. Bobby, high as fuck off mushrooms, grabs the inflatable Grinch, and Bobby Bombs it without a second thought.

Fucked with the wrong one today, Grinch.

Bobby scratches the back of his head and begins to let the lights dance in his eyes once more.

Man, I wish TK was here.


[bwo]~ Back in the limo~[/bwo]


The red hummer limo crosses the Main Street bridge in Toledo, Ohio, with Charlie at the wheel. Making the final destination just around the corner. The Nickleman pulls over to the side of the road after rounding a left. He parks in front of the large office building. Jimmy opens the door and gets out. TK follows Jimmy out with notebook in hand, Jimmy shuts the limo's door behind TK.

Where to now?

TK points to the office building. TK begins walking forward with Jimmy in tow. TK's eyes narrow and begin to look around because at this exact moment. TK realizes that this isn't the first time he's been here. This is where The Ministry of F.U.N. had two hood men kidnap him. He sakes off his feelings of anxiety and presses ever forward unsubdued. Upon getting closer to the building the camera catches a laminated sign on the door before TK opens it. The sign reads: " W.O.R.M.D. Support group". Once inside a more formal sign sits with an arrow pointing the two men towards the conference room. TK walks into the conference room. Not one soul is inside, or so he thought. From behind TK is blindfolded. The camera turns dark like a giant bag covered a drone or something. The audio still remains. The only thing that could be heard is Jimmy's cries, an unknown voice, and Thunder Knuckles.

Take this one, he's the one. The one that's crying, leave, he's not with the group.

Fuck me! Not again!

Just keep moving.

TK doesn't seem to be fighting it at least by the sounds of things.

Watch your step and duck your head.

The sound of a car's trunk closing can be heard before and an engine starts up. The video feed shows nothing and the sounds of tries on road can be heard for approximately an hour, eleven minutes, forty-six and a half seconds. The sound of the engine turning off and the trunk opening can be heard then the video feed shows TK being unblindfolded.

They really don't want people to know where we fucking meet, huh?

The unknown man shrugs, before saying.

Just doing my job, man. Take that alleyway, then take the left at the split, that's where you'll see a door. You'll know it when you see it. Do ya got it?

TK seems unamused by all this but nods his head and salutes with his rolled-up notebook. TK starts walking down the poorly light alleyway to the split. He takes a right before remembering that he was supposed to go left after about ten steps in, he course corrects. Once down the second alleyway, he reaches the shiny red door that seems out of place, he takes a deep breath and opens it. As he opens it he's met with a blinding light and a wave of heat. The light blinds him for a second and he does his best to block it with his hand, but it hardly does anything. The heatwave that met him at the door doesn't go away and forces a bead of sweat to trickle down the side of his head. He tries fanning himself with the notebook, but again, to no avail. Once TK and the camera break the threshold the light disappears but the heat remains. Inside you notice a podium in front of the room. TK finds a seat in the back of a twelve-person, five-row deep, audience. A sign on the podium reads: Wrestlers "Omega" Robert Main Ducked. The support group is pretty quiet even though the wrestlers are talking amongst themselves. The room comes to a complete halt as the host walks to the front and stands behind the podium.



































































[bwo][/bwo]


Hello, my friends! My name is Doctor Louis D'Ville. I welcome you all on this most fine evening! Shall we begin?

The shot of Doctor D'Ville behind the podium fades to black.

XWF fans! I say it’s time we settle this score once and for fucking all, yeah? My only goddamn question to you is...


TK with a shit-eating grin plastered on his face, he belts out

Are you fucking ready!?

TK looking into the camera cups his hands over his mouth, as if to make a megaphone, and howls out.

LEEEEEET’S GOOOOOOOO!

TK, cigar roasting away between his knuckles, looks to be all business. Some people don't think he deserves to be here, at this moment, one of very few Robert Main appearances a year. He plans to prove them all wrong.

Robert’s going to get on your television and do what he always does. Blame someone else for the reason why he’s in his current situ-fucking-ation. Let’s talk about who needs help? What the fuck is up with Robert Main having all these dudes that are believed to be dead showing up as backup, for that numbed-tongued bitch? Drew ‘propunctual loser’ Archyle

Perpetual loser.

Jimmy, how about you shut the fuck up, like right the hell now. If you know what's best for you.

Sorry, Thunder Knuckles, but you are right he is punctual too.

Jimmy says, trying to get the heat off himself by agreeing with TK.

Where was I? Oh, that’s right. Anytime Robert sticks his foot in his mouth and makes a mess of himself. There's Drew to clean it up.

TK gives his remarkable, The kind of talent that Robert Main wishes he had to pull off, such a spectacular, jerking-off hand gesture.

This bitch of a man has been avoiding this moment for so long he probably thinks the reason he went after Chris Page is he was pretty much guaranteed a fucking win, the second time of course. Who can’t beat Chris Page, right? Oh, Wait! Robert Main has even done that! That, shit pot, couldn't even get a draw the first go around in 2021.

TK takes a drag and blows out the smoke.

Now that, sir, is a fucking talent! A talent so rare that it only shows up once in a while, right, Rob? Lame Brain fancies himself a fucking triumphant goddamn conqueror. When in reality he’s a sniveling bitch. Who cries harder than a virgin at a fucking gang bang. What’s Robert Main got to hang his hat on? A lengthy bullshit Hart Title run, that despite what he says, he barely fucking defended. Ask around. I'm sure someone will tell you the goddamn truth. What else? Know what? I’ll tell fucking you. He’s got the fact that ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles cracked his ass in the head and took him out. How long were you out Rob? Long enough to know not to come around here trying to fight yours fucking truly, right? Goddamn, we got so much goddamn ground to cover.

TK walks over to a prepared bar to his right. He begins to pour himself some whiskey.

Now some of your biggest fans, think you shouldn't have to prove yourself against yours truly, and I'm sure you'll say something fucking similar because your a fucking idiot that believes your Jesus, or some shit. I met Jesus. One thing is for sure, Jesus was better looking. Let’s not bullshit the fans, yeah? Robert challenged Engi for the Uni, and when he couldn’t get the job done with a challenge. He turned right around and cashed in. What a goddamn lame. If it wasn’t for Engi’s retirement, as they say. Engi would have come back to spank his ass like he did the first fucking time.

TK still hasn't touched the whiskey glass he had poured.

Oh, I ain't done. Todd put the clip on everyone's screens at home.

Todd does as Thunder Knuckles asks and your screen is filled with this:


[bwo][/bwo]


Run your mouth all you want, Robert “the basic” Main. That was heading into Leap of Faith 2020. You wouldn’t fight me then and you’ve, sure as shit, have been avoiding it since. Now, despite whatever the fuck you say the proof that your a pussy remains. You went after Page because he paid me to do this to you, right?

TK gives the camera the middle finger queuing Todd to put another graphic on your television screen.


[bwo][/bwo]


Bitch, for 6 days, you were warned. Are you too fucking stupid or too damn headstrong not to see the writing on the wall? Never mind, history is the fucking holder of that one. Your recent attempts to gain goddamn publicity have proven you’re nothing more than a deformed stripper, dancing, hoping, praying, someone might actually give a fuck about you. I mean, the first time you tried to venture outside of this company was to GCWA. Then you do what you always do Main. Which is, not do your fucking job. It was probably because you heard ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles entered the Righteous Rumble and you knew without a shadow of a fucking doubt, yours fucking truly, the Relentless Legend, was going to eliminate you in a whole other company! Proving once and for fucking all your a waste of goddamn air time.

TK picks up the whiskey glass, sniffs it, and smiles knowing that's some damn fine whiskey.

Speaking of money because air time is money. How much was it, Main? Don't play coy, you pampered bitch. You know what I'm talking about. How much was 'Ol Thunder Knuckles paid to crack your skull and keep your ass gone for as long as I did? TWENTY-FIVE THOUSAND XBUX? Holy fucking shit! Your whole-ass career means less than one shot at the Television Title! Fuck ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles sold just a shot at that illustrious belt for ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND XBUX. Hell, the dude even fucking won his match so those xbux were well spent! For those that don’t math good. Here’s looking at you, Main. Television Title greater than Main's career, three-fourths more to be fucking exact. Imagine that? Xbux being able to gauge one's whole career. That's how ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles got his start and the beginning of his meteoric rise to fucking fame. Let’s talk about War Games 2020. It is the elephant in the goddamn room right, Rob? See it’s okay to sell out the likes of Sebastian Duke at Lethal Lottery. A Pay-Per-View that ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles is going to claim responsibility for it not happening in 2021. I’ll own it. It’s fucking mine to own, but fuck me! Come War Games 2020, selling out Robert Main for over THREE HUNDRED THOUSAND XBUX is a step too far. That's when 'Ol Thunder Knuckles was kidnapped by the Ministry of F.U.N. and lost a fortune. I called you a protected bitch then and I’ll stand by that shit now. Want proof, you spineless gutter slut of a man?

Todd as always gets it and places another graphic on your screen.


[bwo][/bwo]


I say one fucking thing to your bitch ass and wait for it…

TK isn't making Todd's job easy with this one, but Todd is up for the challenge.


[bwo][/bwo]


Boom, here's your goddamn sign you spit-roasted fucking twat! Drew can’t fight this goddamn battle for you. Hell, even if he was, his dumb ass wouldn’t help you. Drew thinks it was about killing you! How incredibly fucking wrong, but, Hey! What do you expect? The dude only has one good eye so his depth perception is fucking off. Now ramble on how no one helps you and how I fucking need it, what a goddamn lame. No, thinking your ass was dead, that shit was a perk. What happened after though? Don’t lose focus now, stay with me! Let's fucking talk about it, shit stain. Page, who you’d later go on to lose to. Mind you in probably the most lackluster fucking showing of Robert Main anyone has ever seen.

TK begins to chuckle before regaining his composure, rolling the whiskey in his glass. Still, not taking a sip.

That says something. Anyway, Page replaces you to face Thad. Page beats Thad. Thad, who you’d later go on to lose too as well, and your own partner, this dimension or the next, crucified you for it! What happened then? That's right, you become a snot-nosed sniveling fucking child. Everyone likes to talk about patterns. Well, I’m fucking seeing a goddamn pattern here, Main. You’re a used tampon of a fucking talent and right now you need to be changed. When you don’t get your way, you tantrum the fuck out. Jim Ceadus and Robert Main were fucking made for one another. APEX. The tip-ity-fucking-top. Well, that is until they're proven to be bottoms. Sucks that everything ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles has said about you is true, bro. You’re an overhyped rancid garbage bag filled with goddamn cat shit. That was only labeled good while no one was fucking around. Thems the cold hard facts, Fuck-o.

TK finally takes his glass and drinks it all in one giant gulp.

No delusions, poison, or hallucinations here, star fucker. ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles is what you’ll never be, Main, a straight-up monstrosity. That reminds me, Page versus Main 4000, the night 3 Relentless match, where you somehow became those drug-induced versions of yourself, all the way down to your weakest form.

Simply.

You.

So many goddamn contradictions so little fucking time, am I right?

Maybe he was just sick, TK?

What?

TK glares over at Jimmy who didn't remain silent after being warned once before.

The only thing he’s sick from is being a worthless twat. Who’s so fucking braggadocious saying he wouldn't get pinned in the twenty-four-seven hallways when he was Xtreme Champion. Til he fucking did, yet another job he didn't get done, and then he disappeared.


[bwo][/bwo]


That's Robert Main in a nutshell, isn't it? Post milk carton, he always comes back looking to get in on shit when it's hot. God knows he wouldn't know how to turn on a heater to save his fucking life. Nope, but this leftover from a generation, that's talent pool was so goddamn thin that even a talentless hack like him could build a fucking name. Hiding behind better athletes to claim the glory for himself. AX3, Apex, later Cataclysm, back to fucking Apex again. The dude has never actually put in the goddamn work. It was always everyone else around him. Facts are a lot like you, Rob. They fucking suck.

TK winks into the camera. He turns and grabs another whiskey glass and begins to fix another drink.

The best part fucking is, I'm only goddamn getting started.

TK looks down at the whiskey, pushes the glass forward on the bar towards the camera, then TK looks back into the camera.

Your self-admitted idiot-ass is in a lot more trouble than you fucking thought. I have what you never encountered before. A vicious vendetta that won't ever let up. Robert, you lit a fire inside of me at War Games 2020, “Captain”. From that moment on ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles knew not only is, yours truly, going to be more than just one of the best earners in XWF history. Nah, ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles knew he’d change the goddamn landscape. Unlike some, I come alive for the rivalry. You can talk all you want but that isn’t going to be enough on December 29th in the greatest state in the fucking Union. I’m about to pull the fucking rug on the bluff. The one where you're considered the best. Oh, and It just so happens I’m fresh out of mercy and you’re shit out of luck. It’s time you reap what you sow. If management thinks they’re protecting you by keeping everyone out of the ring with a steel cage. Well, I've got some bad fucking news for them, broke brain. The only thing they really did was trap you in there with me. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, this is the end of the goddamn road. Pinfall, submission, and ‘Ol Thunder Knuckles delivering the beating of a goddamn lifetime on one man. Robert Main. I’m coming home on Warfare to raise and watch your fucking star fall. I’m here to finish you. The only thing you'll be left with is this fucking glass of whiskey that I just poured you. God knows you're going to need all the liquid courage you can handle, for that walk down to the goddamn ring.

TK cocks his head back while he cups his hand over his mouth, as if to make a megaphone, and yells out with pure intensity.

LEEEET’S GOOOOOOO!

TK looks back into the camera focused and points into it before the promo fades for the final time.