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Vita Frickin Valenteen · (10-03-2021)

I DID IT!

I defeated the big bad giant of the XWF and recaptured the XWF Television Championship! If it weren't for the whole being a vampire thing, it would almost feel like old times, you know, before BOB came along and made it their numero uno mission to completely derail my career! Speaking of BOB, how awesome was it to watch as the "core of BOB" totally betrayed Miss Fury before she had the chance to do the same to them!?

Oh yeah chick, you probably shouldn't murder your employees and discuss bailing on the team with your aged-out boy toy when you guys have, er... HAD all of that super cool spy equipment that could totally be used against you. Needless to say, in the end, being the villain costs you everything, and for the first time in years, you're quiet.

Yep, Relentless weekend was TOTALLY AWESOME!

But it has left people with questions, and while I can't elaborate if our actions lead to the end of BOB, or was only a small setback for the group, what I can comment on is any future between myself, The Bastards, and Oswald. There's been tons of speculation on if our actions against Fury, Page and the whole of BOB were the start of something new between the four of us? Others have asked how I could possibly stand and fight alongside any member of that group after the Hell that they put me through in 2019 and 2020?

To them, I say this, if my time learning from "The Banana Lime Blur", Ruby taught me anything, it's that sometimes all people need to become better versions of themselves is a little faith and guidance. I put my faith into that night totally NOT being a trap, and it paid off in spades as Miss Fury had her entire world come crashing down by the hands of her own "personal army". I'm not going to lie, it felt pretty great not only to cut the evil head from BOB's shoulders but also it was nice to have someone looking out for me, no matter what their motivations may have been.

Thanks, TK.

A few days after Relentless Night 3. Vita hasn't fed since facing Rampage on night two. She's beginning to grow weak. She had hoped that she could fight off the hunger between matches, but she's beginning to see how poor of a plan that is on its own. She needs blood to maintain her strength. Her idea was to drink from her opponents during matches. She was working under the assumption that whoever she faced would deserve it, but what if they don't, and what if too much time passes between matches that she grows so weak that it cost her?

NO! She can't have that!

SHE WON'T!

But picking off douchebags and cheaters for a quick snack doesn't exactly feel right, at least, not now that she isn't in a hunger frenzy. She's on the right track, but if she's going to do this right, she needs to choose her targets more carefully. She needs to only attack those who truly do nothing but bring pain into this world.

Marf isn't a saint. She knows that he used to be involved with a shady organization known as The Left Hand, which carried the whispered reputation of being Satanist, but she doesn't have any idea how true that may have been. Personally, she wouldn't be surprised if it was all for shock and awe, sort of like the insults and empty threats that Marf is famous for tossing around, but she could see people thinking the same about her current situation, so who knows? What she does know is that Marf is a haunted soul that seems to rarely find enjoyment in most things, but he totally seems to enjoy hurting people in the ring.

Hmm, maybe that's reason enough?

Do you ever feel like the world is out to get you? Like no matter how hard you try to succeed, to do right, to be a man that your mama can be proud of, there’s always going to be this crushing weight on your shoulders trying to pound you into the ground? That’s how I feel every day, especially in times like these.

“Yo mom, what’s for dinner?” D’Andre asks as he barrels in through the front door, pulling my attention away from the random movie that was playing. I swear, by the look of him, you would be forgiven for not realizing just how hard we struggle around here.

“Nothin’ fool. Do you see mom anywhere?” I snap at him with a sharp tone, irritated more with the situation than him, but I neglect to point that out. D’Andre’s shoulders slump as the realization sets in. He tosses his backpack to the floor and falls into the chair across from me.

“Damn man, I missed lunch too!” He says as he rubs his stomach, no doubt from hunger pains if what he said is true. “How’d you miss lunch, fool? You got a damn government card!” I’m talking about the free school lunch card that he gets as part of Mom’s food stamps. D’Andre looks away in shame and immediately, I know what happened.

“Maaaan, your punk ass need to stand up to that fool! Why you let him pick on you anyway?” He doesn’t look at me as he mumbles his reasoning. “What was that?” I ask with that same sharp tone as before as I push to the edge of my seat to make him think I might pounce his ass if he say the wrong thing. “YO, BRO, I said WHAT DID YOU SAY!?” This time he doesn’t hesitate to look directly into my eyes. It seems I lit a fire as he barks back, “Because I can’t afford to be thrown out of school over something stupid like a two-dollar lunch card and end up being worthless like you!”

Damn, that hit hard and wasn’t exactly my situation, but close enough. “Worthless? That’s what you think of me?” Yeah, it’s true that I’ve made mistakes, but to be called worthless, and by your own brother no less? Judging by the fire in his eyes that his newly formed tears fail to extinguish, I don’t look forward to hearing what he says next at all.

“Well, you are, ain’t you!? What are you doing to help out? Mom’s struggling with bills, working all those shifts, an what are you doin’?” My first thought is that’s not fair. My second is that he’s right about mom, and I feel bad for her, but “You know I’ve been putting out apps!”

“Yeah, an not taking the jobs!” He fires back. “I took the job”, I rebuttal! “Pfft, for a day, then yo ass said “too hard” an dipped!” he says with a mocking chuckle.

“Not fair! I don’t see you jumping at the opportunity to scrub projectile shit off the restroom wall!” He scoffs at me before replying. “No, I’m not. That’s why I can’t risk getting kicked outta school over something as dumb as a lunch card!” He jumps up and storms off. I try to call out to him, but he’s already out the front door before I finish his name.

Later that evening I find myself on the bus heading across town. Tito has tried to get me to sell for him in the past and I’ve refused. I can’t imagine Mom's face if she were to find out, and up until now that has been enough of a detraction to keep me away, but Dre’s right. Shit is sour for us, and I’m really not doing anything to help. Even if I did take some minimum wage part-time job, to what end would it really help us? A few hundred extra dollars a month? Anything is better than nothing, but why settle for peanuts when you KNOW that you can do better?

The bus slows down for my stop in an area that could only be described as “the wrong side of town”. What am I doing here? I keep telling myself that I’m getting paid. It does little to calm my nerves. A stalky man notices me approaching the house from the front porch. He’s sitting in a rusty steel folding chair positioned beside the front door. There’s a brown paper bag in his hand wet and formed around the brown glass bottle it conceals. “Hey little man, you need something?” I may not legally be an adult, but I’m hardly little with the 182 pounds that I carry on my 6’4 frame. “Yo, I need to see Tito. He around!?” He takes a sip of his drink as he looks me up and down. “Tito ain’t here. Why don’t you just go home?” I’m not sure if he doesn’t trust me, or if maybe he thinks he’s protecting me from a mistake. Not sure why. I’ve never met this cat before in my life. Either way, I know Tito’s here, and I’m not going home.

“YO’ TITO! IT’S IVAN!” The man on the front porch doesn’t say a word, but I can tell that he’s disappointed in my actions. Within moments, Tito steps out onto the porch. He’s a mountain of a man, standing about six feet tall, and wide. He greets me with a big toothy smile. “Yo holmes! What brings you all the way out here? Looking to score a little green again, maybe?” I’m not sure if he means weed or cash, but I nod as I reply. “Yeah, you still got that opening”? With a warm smile, he takes me under his arm and leads me inside to discuss business.

(To be continued...)

The scene opens from inside of the Ohio Stadium where we see Vita Valenteen standing center field preparing to roll on an old-school promo! Some people argue that this style is passe or dated, but Vita would argue that it has a certain nostalgic charm that is mostly missing from today's overproduced outings, and they definitely have their place even in this day and age.

Pop quiz, hotshot! Savage, Columbus Ohio! Main Frickin' Event! Television Championship on the line! All the pressure in the world is on your shoulders to NOT choke in your first defense! Everyone doubts you! Everyone expects you to screw it up! You always screw it up, and this time, standing across the ring you see a wild Marf appear. Strategic advantage is in your favor! You may choose the conditions of war! What do you do?

What Do You Do!?

I'll tell you what you do! You erase any doubt of the legitimacy of your reign by slanting that advantage in favor of your opponent because whether it be a reign that lasts for two weeks or two years, it will not be a reign that can be called into question!

Marf is a former Television Champion who reigned for 34 days back in the month of April. This is a fact that is overshadowed by a few losses to what is arguably the world's greatest tag team today, but it's not a fact that is lost on me. That reign proves that on any given night, Marf has what it takes to win this championship! On top of that, just watch the dude's matches! He's frickin psycho!

Not really!

I think?

But there's no doubt that the lengths this man is willing to go in the ring makes the viciousness that Vita was once known for seem pretty darn tame by comparison!

But that doesn't mean that I'm afraid to stand toe to toe with the...

Vita pauses as she finds herself at a loss for words.

Um... what's the nickname he uses to convey that dangerously extreme side of himself?

After an awkward silence, a male voice responds from behind the camera. "Just Marf"

Just Marf? Really!?

"Yep, just Marf."

Huh... Well, marketing isn't his thing, but that's fine, it's all about the violence, and that's why I'm going to name my stipulation as something that will cater to my opponent and give him the best shot at defeating me! Why? Well partly because I'm hungry to learn, hungry to grow, and TOTALLY hungry for...

COMPETITION!

A wise man once said, when you stop pushing yourself to do things that you're uncomfortable with, that's when you stop learning and improving! I refuse to stop because I look to one day stand alongside of the greats of this industry! I'm also kinda a vampire now, so I feel like I have enough of an advantage going into these matches and the world is all about balance or something, right?

I've watched the tapes! I've seen the look on your face as you tortured your opponents within inches of their lives! I know what you want Marf, and I'm going to give it to you! You want this match bloody, and mmmmm!

Vita licks her lips before continuing.

And I do as well!

Our match will be No Holds Barred / Falls Count Anywhere!

Marf, you now have the advantage in terms of the stipulation, but that doesn't guarantee you anything! You're still going to have to fight me with every fiber of your being if you want THIS!

Vita throws up the new TV championship for the camera to soak in.

AND I welcome the challenge!

Vita holds her pose for just a second or two before the man behind the camera calls "cut"! Vita slumps as her body language completely change. She looks as though she's almost in... pain?

"Everything okay VV?" asks the concerned cameraman.

All good!.. She lies. Just give me a minute...

Vita stumbles away as the cameraman begins to pack up. It's the hunger. It's been too long. She's still getting the hang of everything, but she definitely can't put off feeding for more than a couple of days without feeling the effects. She needed to feed, and soon. Then after that, she'd need to devise ways to locate targets that she wouldn't totally feel terrible about accidentally murdering should she not control herself and drink too much.

Ugh, as if being a woman in the professional wrestling business wasn't hard enough on its own, try balancing a diet of guilt humans blood while touring the world. Totally not easy! Good thing she has some experience hunting down bad people already!

ALSO To be continued!

Wait, what!? oO

Next "issue!", The Pink Mist returns!?

Or something else entirely?

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