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Atara Raven · (09-21-2021)

It's my first Relentless. May be a shock to a few people, but for most I highly doubt it. It's around that time of year, or that Atty timing I hear about every promo. I show a flash and gas out before catching flame. Racked up a bunch of inconsequential wins and no one gives a fuck titles. Built a little steam and believed my own hype, believed all the high praise about my potential. Actually no, there's legitimate truth to the praise about what I could do. Scratch that.

I am good. I'm fucking great. At every aspect of this game.
Marketing, Presence With the Fans, In the Ring, On the Mic, Social Media...if it exist in this business I can do it and I can do it more than likely better than all of you. I'm possibly the most versatile superstar XWF has or will ever see and I already know what's rolling of tongues....

Then why don't you have a title that matters. Why have you never won a title that matters. Why do you always drop the ball Oh Mighty Grecian Goddess?

I used to think it was because I was lazy. Because I didn't have to try because as stated, my minimum is your maximum. There wasn't anything I really cared about here and in those small moments there was it got ripped away or I threw it away.

It's simple. I can't follow narrative. I refuse to follow narrative. There is a script at XWF, fuck, every company and if you don't stick to it, offer the slightest resistance the vultures decend. Don't get twisted, I'm not saying the company is out to get me. I've shot myself in the foot and the front office as done nothing but reward me with chance and chance and shot after shot. I'm saying there is a mold and I've been terrified of filling it.

I can't follow narrative. I won't be consistent. I do what I want when I want and I do it how I want with who I want. If it gets me gold and a nice little stat sheet so be it, if not...

Eff it. I'm famous bitches. My goal is reached. This is all just for fun now.

For serious though.....what the fuck is a Snow Bunny!

Hippopotamus kill an average of 500 Human Beings a year. Twice as deadly Lions, who aren't even the most deadly feline by the way. Tiger swipe them bitches throats in India. Anywho, 1900 - 2000 no wolves killed any human. Most attacks are from the rabid ones. No one uses blue in the fire things...it's the hottest part of the flame. Most monsters are brain dead idiots. Jason, Myers, a few here...I mean really...

You want to relate to something really terrifying. Be a Tabby. Murder machines that kill babies.

FFS™

Haha...

This has absolutely nothing to do with the promo and I can't use the spoiler thing because *cough*SomeonestoleIt*cough* and this is payback.

Hello Doves!

....Hello John.

I suppose we start this thing by saying first and foremost thank you to whoever booked this thing!

OPA You!

Here I thought I was going to have to cancel and miss out on soooooooooooo many opportunities and things I wanted to do over the next few weeks. Mainly the music festivals back home. Biggest PPV of the year! Biggest names! Every title! Holy Shit I was worried I would be booked against someone....

Can I do still do the irrelevant thing? I still have that much clout right?

...someone that actually might push me to be more than minimal effort Atty. Imagine my relief when I saw John Black, a guy I've slapped around twice before without so much as breaking a sweat. Pretty much everyone has at some point though right. I mean come on, the guy is made bitch in his own effin promos and 'retired' or 'left' more times than Barney, Warstein, and myself combined.

The guy couldn't be more pushover if he was a double leg amputee with broke crutches. I could Mastermind this promo and rewrite a song and literally still be more entertaining.

Think I'm bringing Whole Ass Effort Atty for that?

....ffs. Did you?

Nope. Train Hard Atty Make An Impression Atty got shelved and instead we went Shake My Shimmy Atty at Plissken 2021 Doves and in typical Atty style I have footage!

Don't Do It John. You're kryptonite as been exposed. Don't click it. I can't be responsible for whatever cardiac event you experience. The thought ruined Charlie Nickles. The picture well surely kill you. Don't Do It.
But for those that do, make sure the music playing. It kind of times up and that was complete coincidence....or was it?

You did it didn't you John! You selfish effin bastard! Now they're gonna have to rebook this thing and I might have to actually try! What's your issue guy? Is it because I'm a woman? Can't help but notice you have a real problem with women in the ring and out. It's not my fault dammit! I didn't ask to be born this way, I didn't ask for you to become overly infatuated with me, especially after I have given you absolutely no reason to think I was remotely interested! I'm not your Snow Bunny! I'm not even white! Technically.

I don't hold it against you that you're as about T.H.U.G as a 12 year old Jenny Myst and keep trying to convince us your so hard despite having been put down countless times by a delusional spandex wearing...

No disrespect Ruby, I love you but seriously.

...cosplay loon. Put down countless times by an albino Charlotte Brontes Regina George hybrid stuck in a perpetual state of Halloween and always going Victorian. Not even slutty Victorian, full fledged.

You were a mask from a movie that came out before I probably even had my first period. What that has to do how back you suck I have no idea but when I think John Black I think sucks and I think dumb ass mask?

I don't even know if you still wear it so if that's an oversight let me nip the promo clap back on that one right now. The mistake was in thinking anyone care enough to pay attention to what John Black was doing much less wearing. Now let's hit pause for a second...

Did you guys see how epic I was in that Pokemon thing Alias did or were too busy still name dropping me in your own promos? Probably both. Answers that relevancy question. Atty still got it. Kiss my ass, Alpha Bitch still driving the conversation.

Go Ahead. You Know You Wanna.

Anywho John, I've covered about as much as I can or care to at this point and honestly I'm bored. Gonna go play on Twitter now. Good luck with whatever it is you got going on and until next time...don't fuck this up for me. I really don't want to try any harder than I have to.

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