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T.H.U.G.S · (09-03-2021)

[All there is to see is a small old TV with static on it, then an unseen person puts a tape inside the VCR. Then it starts to play the tape of all the Tag Teams that once roamed in the XWF from it’s early inception up to the current generation. We see each of the teams winning the XWF Tag Team gold, and seeing them posing with the title. Then the tape stops, and the unseen person takes the tape out of the VCR, then the person puts another tape in, and this time it shows The No Good Bastards and Dissentients in all their glory in the XWF, but before it went on the tape randomly stopped playing. Then the person takes the tape out, and bashes it with a hammer to pieces.]

[Then about ten minutes later, we see JB and Tommy inside a room where there were pictures of all the tag teams were on the wall, as they study each team, the hooded man held the broken tape and shows it to them, and they get mad him.]

JB: Why did you break the tape?

???: I wanted too since it’s a bad Tape anyways.

T: It’s not a bad tape, I just checked it about a week ago. An—

???: IT IS DEAD OKAY!

JB: Okay then calm down, now go fuck off elsewhere.

[Then the hooded person the fucks off elsewhere, as the guys still study all the tag teams on the wall.]

T: Didn’t you bring up something about the Sugay Sisters at one time?

JB: Yeah I did, I kinda think they had something but faded away so quickly out of the company. Maybe we might be next on that chopping block.

T: What makes you say that?

JB: They might say we are too much of a non team who happen to be paired up from some circumstances. They think their foul play involved with us working together.

[T then takes down the pictures of Bastards and the former Left Hand members Lycana and Marf, and places them on the table. Then he takes a swig of water out of his flask, as JB paces around the room, as if he is dealing with something.]

T: Dude, your paranoia is getting me worried, is there something you need to tell me?

JB: There is, I am starting to think we are unwanted here. Since we paired up, things haven’t been the same in terms of our singles career here. While you and Reggie were the X-Treme champions twice, i’ve been on the back burner for long ass time. I’m just thinking that, we have no place in this division at all.

T: What the fuck are you talking about? JB, we been rolling together since 2019… we have been the ones who but BoB on the map… remember that beatdown we did? Don’t you remember we beat up the power couple last few years prior?… why are you telling me this now?

[JB then slams his fist on the table where he placed on the picture of Marf, and looked at Tommy with eyes of hostile territory, as Tommy tries to calm him down.]

JB: I am just starting to go fucking crazy with these thoughts of not being a team… those critics are the ones who are saying shit like this. I can’t even sleep at night, knowing that they rather prefer organic pairs, then manufactured kind of pairs. I’m starting to think that… I can’t handle this tag shit.

T: Look JB, if it’s the tag team title match your scared of, please tell me… I’m listening.

[Then both of them sit on the chairs around the tables, and JB looked at the ceiling lights as he tries to hold back his thug tears. Then the hoodied man brings back a letter that was written in blood by Marf and Lycana, and Tommy crumbles it up and tosses it in the garbage. Then he shoo’s away the man, as JB beams his eyes at Tommy.]

JB: Fuck the tag title match… I’ve become a shell of my former self, ever since I came back in the XWF.. I had this goal, this high exception to be the big negro on campus… but no, fuck me and what i’ve done in this place. I still can’t forget that time I was in this trios tag match, where I had to defend those titles with two no names who left me behind… that what made me quit this shit, and find myself a civilian job in IT. I removed myself from this shit, just to come back and have it haunt me in my face.

T: JB JB, listen to me man… look how many times you been in title matches so far this year, I can’t even say that you are a former shell of yourself. You gotten more chances then anyone of us can bare, shit look at me, I almost won the X-Treme title from homeless looking dude when Jim rode off in his bike at night. Look at Reggie, the same guy you brought back in this world of XWF… had the best matches of his career here, because of you, JB. Truth be told, I was serious about ditching this place for something else, but you managed to tell me to stay and hold shit down. You’re an influence to these people, and you don’t even know it man…

JB: I know that I am, but it feels like I anit good enough to hang with people. I might act like I don’t give a shit about what others think, but deep down I fuckin do. I haven’t told you or anyone this about myself, and it’s just me not being able to deal with hate of being a wrestler. I told myself after that Trios bullshit, that I was going to forget that I even wrestle in this forsaken company. But, that guy Vinnie… I owe that motherfucker for bringing me back onto this circuit, and you willing to work with me to fuck shit up in the XWF.

[Then Tommy has a warm smile on his face, and the two embrace with a bro hug. Then the hoodied man comes back with ANOTHER letter and this time it’s by Bastard’s very own Knux in his trailer trash grammar, and he crumbles that up and tosses it into the bin once again. Then the hoodied man tell them that something is ready for them, and they leave the room and enter a hallway down a dark corridor, and they enter one of the left doors into a shooting range, where they have replaced the target posters with Bastards and Dissentients. As each men take turns shooting at all four of them with various amounts of weapons, about two hours later they stop and leave the range to get something to eat near the area. They got back into the room ten minutes later, and started eating some Pizza and drinking beer.]

JB: Shit this pizza you ordered is fuckin delicious

T: Who says you can’t put Wolf’s blood on a pizza topping!

JB: Speaking of Wolf’s blood, what was the deal with you and Lycana last week?

T: Let’s not even blab about it… I was thinking to do that nWo shit with the following announcement gag they did back then. I really want to lay in my thoughts to them, and I like for you to be apart of that, if you are okay with that.

JB: Yeah man, let's finish up our lunch and shoot that piece that none is going to watch.

[After the men had finished the pizza and beer, this shows up…]

Tha following announcement has been paid fo by tha THUGS

[We see four scantly clad women, who dressed up like their opponents, including two of them holding TWO paper tag titles on their shoulders around the outside. Then we see them inside a makeshift ring, where they hear piped in boo’ing noises as JB “hushes” the crowd up while Tommy speaks.]

Tomsta: Let me tell you people something, we don’t give a fuck if you don’t think we are real team. We don’t care if you guys they we are killing and sucking the life out of the Tag Team Division, ever since we came onto the scene… we told ourselves not to worry about the belts if they aren’t willing to let us play ball with it. Isn’t that right JB?

[JB then nods his head in an agreement, as the piped in boo’ed magnified.]

Tomsta: So now, we found out that we are going to be involved against the two teams who this company deems most worthy of all teams in the universe, ya dig? This coming Saturday next week, is going to determine who’s the best of the best tag team in history. I know it anit us, because by now if you seen the taped delayed Anarchy, we’d be beaten (or not) by Rubio—errr Ruby and Calypso.

[JB and Tommy then “winks” the camera for exposing the business, then Tommy hands the mic to JB as he does his best Ric Flair woo impression, as the piped in boo’s calmed out of respect for JB.]

JB: Let me tell y’all mothafuckas something, I had my breakdown from all the hate from the Wrestling trolls and critics for how I cheated myself with rollin with Tomsta. Hey, maybe I anit the best tag specialist XWF has too offer, but they know I can whoop asses with anyone I deem fit to fuck with me. I might not be a money hungry trailer trash, a failed mascot for alcoholic anonymous, former TV Champion with a sense of an egoistic edgelor, and a fucking Wolf bitch who i’d kill with a silver fucking bullet in a heart beat!

[Then the camera pans to those aforementioned characters, who looked at JB with such distain, and he looks at each and everyone of them outside of the ring.]

JB: I’m talking to all four of you, you might think you are the top tog of the Tag Division. That’s fine by me, but all I see is a bunch of guys who have got to understand that we aren’t Tag Team Specialist who’s end goal is to win the tag straps then fuck off after week of winining it..we are TAG TEAM EXTREMIST… we might not have the same singles title reigns, might not have the same taste in women’s feet, hell we might not even have the same parents… we THUGS fo life. We don’t need to be validated by those that don’t like us, we DEMAND your respect for all the shit we do, and if not… then FUCK Y’ALL FO BOTHERIN US!

[Then the piped crowd noise went from boo’ing to slowly chanting “THUGS” in unison, and he does the walk in place that Brock used to do, as he handed the mic back to Tommy.]

Tomsta: Well I almost shed a tear on that one, I can’t even bother to finish my part… but—

[Then the four ladies had enough of their shit, and try to beat them down, but it was painfully obvious they weren’t doing much damage to them. JB slow punches cosplay TK and Bobby, as Tommy was getting smothered to death by cosplay Marf and Lycana with their feet to his face. With the power of boners, Tommy breaks out of the smothering and he dishes out the slowest headbutt to the both of them. JB then “saves” him by pulling their bras off to expose a “NOPE” censor bar on their tits. As they flea away from the ring, the two handle the fake Bastards with ease as Tommy simply Claws fake Bobby’s massive tits as she screams in pleasure and JB giving an old school Airplane Spin on fake Knuckles and slams her down. He then “pins” her with Tommy doing the most slowest count ever to win. Then we see the hooded man giving them the Two Paper Tag Titles, and they “celebrate” as the two “former champions” still in the ring in pain. Tommy then gets the mic from the floor and speaks.]

Tomsta: We did y’all we did the unthinkable! We are now the tag champions!… Ehh time to vacate them and go solo.

[JB then snatches the mic from him in confusion.]

JB: What I thought we were in for the long haul?… I mean isn’t the point of us you know…being a TAG TEAM EXTREMIST?… fine if you want to split then watch your career be flamed out, sucka.

[Then both men start to come up onto one another’s with hostile vibes, but then they said “SIKE” and they tow their paper tag belts in the air, with the hoodied man throwing little garbage at them. Then JB takes the mic for the last time.]

JB: This is all just a joke, so don’t get your panties or in this case your bra straps in a bunch. If you feel like I offended you, it’s all fun and games until shit start popping up for real. I mean, Bastards while they are the best fucking team that made themselves a household name, they aren’t worth the XBUX that isn’t even printing at this moment. They are blessed to be tag champ on another fed, but if we some how beat them wouldn’t that kill their heat with OCW? Let me not go far into that, that’s not our problem to expose them for hucksters and grifters they be. Let me tell Marf and Lycana something too, you both can all burn in hell where you all dwell in. You Marf are lucky that Vinnie saved you from me taking that bling bling belt, but now Big Daddy Vinnie anit here to bail you out. Lycana, whatever your beef is with Tommy has fallen on to me now, so you anit safe either, shewolf bitch!

[JB then hands the mic to Tommy for his final say.]

Tomsta: Hey don’t fuck with us, we might not be coming home with the straps next Saturday, but I promise…no WE promise to tear these two teams up into pieces, and leave their remains in a meat grinder, maybe I can have chance at Lycana’s severed tits in my hands. We gon get dirty, we gon get rough… and most of all… we finna prove that WE are the realist fucking team grace this company! We done with this shit, AH!

Dis Promo was paid fo by tha THUGS BITCH!

We fade out.

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