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Lycana · (04-01-2021)

When we last saw our lovable lunatic Quokkana, she had not only been booted out of a nursing home for performing Backstreet Boys on a lunch table, she had a boo boo on her ass cheek that nobody would kiss, zero new best friends, and crazy idea on her mind.

She had gone back to her house to prepare for her big night at the FXW. The sausages were packed. Her outfit was chosen. And the pink pom-pom kid gloves were coming off. It was time for her to step up and show them what she was all about!

“You are soooo cute and floofy Mr. Wiggles, yes you are! Yes, you are!”

We see her sitting on her bed, a fluffy white rabbit in her lap and an adorable mug in her hand. Because why not? Doesn’t everybody do this sort of thing when they need to go to a wrestling event? Don't let them lie to you if they say they don’t.

“You have the wiggliest nooose! I’m going to boop that nose! Yes I am, my little sugary snack cake!”

She looks up with a wide grin.

“Hello again friends! Isnt Mr. Wiggles totally the bestest most sweetest wittle baby you’ve ever seen?”

Mr. Wiggles has blue ribbons tied to his ears. He looks like he wishes someone would just put him out of his misery.

“Anyway, I thought I’d have some scrum-diddly-umptious tea while waiting for the helicopter to come pick up my new present. I don’t know if the glitter will be enough if theres a meanie bo beanie pig on the loose. And like, now I got a text from my friend Sparklemuffin. And she was telling me allll about this dream she had. It was pretty rad, see she was like crashing through the waves on a magenta unicorn, that shot starbeams out of its horn and turned people into mermaids and it was soooooo cool. I wish it were real!”

She bounces excitedly. Mr. Wiggles tries to leap to his doom but she holds on, kissing his nose. Did she say helicopter?

“Oh... and that there were a bunch of people who were going to.... fight! Fight during our fun party that we are supposed to have. We can't make friends that way! I knew it was up to me to save the day, and I know just the thing to make all those frowns turn upside down!”

She puts poor Mr. Wiggles in his cage before she goes outside of her house, the sounds of a chopper getting closer. Shit. She wasn’t lying, there it was! It hovers over a large net on the ground, that is filled with literally hundreds of Squishmallows... only the best stuffed animals ever. Duh. A hook is lowered, and Quokkana ties each corner of the net to it. It is then lifted into the sky, and is off, headed towards the event.

“Yay! I hope Sean Peacestein likes cuddle parties.”

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