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Diesel · (03-11-2021)

When we last left our anti-hero, Big Daddy Cool Diesel was seen at the Oz-Corp Ro-BOB Factory with BoB leader Miss Fury and Money Odwald (perpetually #51 on the all time XWF Top 50) after having his brand new state of the art 10 billion dollar bionic quads installed with titanium rods and muscle harvested from Lex Luger.

We also learned that saying the number 51 caused intense rage from Money Oswald.

And that Diesel was wrong and Centurion is actually less interesting than watching paint dry.

We now join Steve Sayors at the outside of the talent entrance...

"Thanks narrator," Sayors replies.

You're welcome Steven.

"Thanks narrator," Sayors says again, for some reason. Sayors covers one ear and shouts like he's in the middle of a ruckus crowd when in reality there's no noise, and no crowd. "DIESEL HAS JUST ARRIVED HERE AT THE DUNKIN DONUTS CENTER HERE IN PROVIDENCE, RHODE ISLAND AND.... CAMERA MAN PULL BACK AND GET A LOOK AT THIS CROWD HERE GATHERED TO GET A GLIMPSE OF THE WWF CHAMPION..."

The camera zooms out...

And...

Diesel saunters up behind Sayors with his WWF title dangling in his fingers.

"Where are all the Dieselmaniacs?" Diesel asks as he slams his free hand on Sayors shoulder. "They were expecting Centurion weren't they? That fCENSOREDer could single handedly bring an end to the entire wrestling industry if Shawn ever let's him have more than five minutes on a microphone. That mother fCENSOREDer has about as much flavor in his promos as a bottle of fCENSOREDing water."

Sayors stands beside Diesel, confused as always.

"DIESEL, THE FANS WANT TO KNOW," Sayors prefaces. "HOW ARE YOU FEELING AFTER YOUR BIG WIN OVER GERI VAYDEN IN THE KING OF THE RING TOURNAMENT!?"

"Let me tell ya somethin' Mean Steve!" Diesel begins. "I won that match... by a lot!"

"TONIGHT ON SAVAGE, YOU ARE BEING FORCED TO GO ONE ON ONE WITH YOUR ANARCHY TAG TEAM PARTNER AND FELLOW BOB MEMBER, OSIRA THEMIS! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THE MATCH TONIGHT!?"

"Well Todd, all I'm gonna say about the match tonight on Superstars, is that it'll be over real quick."

Diesel starts to head into the arena.

"IS DIESEL GONNA ADVANCE INTO MARCH MADNESS LIVE ON PAY PER VIEW!?"

"Big Daddy Cool is goin' to WrestleMania!" Diesel again starts to head into the arena, but turns back once again.

"WRESTLING FANS, THERE YOU HAVE IT!"

"Yeah this sucked but you know fCENSOREDin what? It's still more interesting than a Centurion promo."

"He's right by the way," Sayors says as Diesel heads into the arena and the scene fades.

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