"Maybe I am villain in your story, but I am hero in mine."

Shon Mehta (The Timingila)

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The headlights from the van barely penetrate the fog as it moseys along the roadway. The smoky haze from inside doesn't help visuals much either, but Fred really had nothing to say about it until he caught a stiff whiff of the devil's cabbage. It sends him into a sneezing/coughing frenzy that pulls the tie dye colored van across the road. Fred finally snaps at them.

It's hard enough to see and concentrate without you two bozos back there burning that stuff!

Shaggy looks pie-eyed up to the driver with a smile as he snorts and gags after whistling a long hit from the doobie.

Like, you need to chill out, man... It helps with my anxiety, ya know?

Rah! Ranxiety! Reeheehehehehehe!

Scooby says as he's passed the jammer.

Like, crack a window or something. Don't be a square, Fredman.

I'm NOT! How are we supposed to be taken seriously if we show up everywhere reeking of this crap all the time?!

Freddy.... Relax... Here, let's turn on some Five Finger Death Punch.

I FUCKING LOVE Five Finger!

Daphne loads up some music from the phone and Fred immediately starts headbanging and playing drums on the steering wheel. After taking a rip Scooby Doo holds it in to the point the smoke pours from his ears. He scoffs and gags as he passes it Velma's way, who continues to just stare ahead paying no attention. Shaggy motions the negative by chopping at his neck and reaches with his forefinger and thumb for the exchange. Reaching foreward, he holds it between Fred and Daphne in the front seat.

You sure you don't want a hit? It might calm you down, dude.

Fred waves his arm back angrily!

Get that thing out of my face, Shag!

Shaggy uses his pothead ninja skills to evade the swift attack and bounces back to the floor where he was. Daphne turns around in her seat reaching with a smile as Fred angrily cranks down the window.

I'll take a hit, Shaggy!

Fred shoots a glare.

Really, Daph?!

Daphne sighs and sits back facing forward in her seat.

I mean, seriously, I JUST said, right? Plus, I'm relying on you as a navigator right now. I don't need you all stoned-up sending us down the wrong road. Put your fucking seatbelt on.

Partaking in such can cause memory loss, increased heart rate, loss of coordination...

Velma rattles off a few more as Daphne grabs the phone back up from the console and flips off the music.

HEY!

She holds the phone about an inch from her face and reads one word at a time...

Stay. On. Route. Straight. For sixty-six miles.

She throws the phone back into the console and folds her arms.

Really? You're going to throw a tantrum because I disagree with you using dru--

Where are we even going, Fred?! We haven't seen another car on this road in hours! We drive place to place to place until we find some fucked up people in some fucked up "ghost town"! Or a haunted hospital! Or an old mine!

Cursed swamps!

Like, zoiks! Y-Y-You guys are freaking me out here.

Rah! Ron't rerind ree...

Shut. Up. Velma. Are you hearing me, Fred?! What is it? A hotel? An ancient Indian burial ground that some evil mayor wants to build a stadium on and an Indian comes out at night wreaking havoc but it was actually just the mail man? Or maybe--

A CARNIVAL!

Fred slams on the brakes, sending his loose passengers tumbling towards the front. Velma, who is strapped into the bench seat along the side, stays secured.

Like, what's the big idea, man?!

Shaggy grumbles pushing his huge dog off of him and returning to the back.

Rah... Rut the ruck, Red?

Fred points out an illegible sign with an arrow directing them down a very grown in road. He steers the van in its direction to shine the headlights for a better visual. The top half is torn off and its very patchy in the middle.

##AN# C#R### PRE#E##S
#W# - #AND
TH# M#ST X#R##E #LAC# #N E#RTH!#!!

How can you, like, even tell? I can't read that. And we all know how well you read, dude.

Open your eyes, hippie!

Fred reaches back and grabs Shaggy by the shirt and pulls him forward. Grabbing him by the back of the neck he steers Shaggy's head at the sign.

GRRRRRR!!

At this view now, nearly on the dashboard, he sees the barely visible print of a carnival ride on the sign.

You see the ferris wheel?! I see a ferris wheel.[/yellow

Yeah, whatever man, I see it.

Shaggy jerks away.

I thought we had an important mystery to solve? Plus, I'm not seeing this place or road or anything on the GPS.

[yellow]It can wait! This place could be haunted too!

It not being in th GPS is certainly a mystery!

What do you say, gang? Want to go check it out?

Fred scans his companions. Velma is up to her feet in the van stretching, Daphne has a blank stare, and Shaggy and Scooby are sitting together watching each other's stomach's rattle and moan.

Like, Scooby and I would normally sit this one out, but I swear I smell popcorn and cotton candy. How 'bout it Scoob?

Scooby sniffs the air a bit.

Rah! Rotton Randy! Mmmhhhmmmm!!

I bet you guys would suck a dick if I bought you lunch afterwards, huh?

Ruck a rick? Rew! Ruck!

Yeah, like, for real, Fred. Even Scoob and I have morals, dude.

Rah! Rorals!

Fred laughs at his own joke before taking the van down the bumpy road. They slowly travel several miles before finally cresting a hill revealing the larger than normal looking carnival sitting in the middle of nowhere.

No wonder this place failed. It's in B.F.E.

Maybe it was for a more exclusive.. wealthier clientele.

Like, what makes you think that? This place is a dump.

The airstrip over there. It looks like it can handle smaller planes.

Velma points out in the distance.

Zoiks, that's pretty wild!

Rahhh... Rancy...

The entire perimeter of the carnival is surrounded by a large chain-link fence covered up with tarps with the top wrapped with barbed-wire and a large gate in front, hiding the abandoned festivities inside.

The van parks and the door to the van slides open to a quick musical, slow motion movie scene where the gang all line up together in front of a cloud of smoke. It's a short walk to the gate where the sign reads a lot better. Unfortunately, they now notice the gate is bound shut by a large chain and a very over abundance of padlocks. Scooby is the first to approach it and gives it a sniff as Fred reads aloud:

Sh-Shayne. K--K-Kar-KahhrrVV. Shaayne Kahhrrver Prrrezz-

Ror rucks rake.. Rane Rarver resents Rex Rubble-Roo Rex-Rand. Ruh Rost Rexreme Race ron----

I CAN READ YOU MUTT!

Grrrrrrr.....

Like, what's the X-W-F? And who's Shane ??

Another mystery!

Daphne comes up behind Fred and carrasses his back and shoulders.

Freddy, don't you have your bolt cutters in the van? We could use them to break this chain.

Yeah. I was just gonna say that.

Fred turns from the group and jogs like a sailor back to the van. While Velma investigates the scenery, Daphne sneaks over to Shaggy who is leaning against the fence lighting up a cigarette. Daphne snatches it out of his hand and takes a quick drag and blows it in his face. Shaggy peaks over to the van where he sees Fred just crawling into the back.

I'm gonna tell your boyfriend you smoke.

Daphne pouts as she takes another hit.

He already knows. And he HATES it. But seriously, listen, if we're doing this you need to give me something. I can't deal, otherwise.

You're so bad. Smoking. Drugs. Breaking and entering...

Shut up and give me something! Pweeeeeze?

Up or down?

Definitely, DOWN. I'd be okay not even remembering this, to be honest.

Coming right up.

Shaggy digs in his pocket and pulls a little bag out and then a single, tiny pill. Daphne steps closer to him, reaching up his shirt, scratching and rubbing his chest as she holds out her tongue. Shaggy places it there ever so gently as Daphne unzips his zipper.

Like, chill man... a time and a place....

Daphne takes the pill with a smile while Shaggy pulls it back up.

Ohhh, yeah. We'd hate to break his fragile, wittle heart, wouldn't we?

She leans in close and pulls Shaggy close enough that her lips tickle his ear.

I bet Velma would watch us...

Like, creepy....

Daphne smiles, winks, then trots away back to the gate as Fred jumps out of the van.

Okay, got 'em!

Fred jogs back over to the gate, seemingly out of breath and wastes no time knocking out padlock after padlock. Daphne watches and looks to Fred then back to each pointless padlock he snips off.

Fred, honey, just cut the chain.

Oh, yeah.

Fred cuts the chain and it falls to the ground. The gate instantly starts opening; sliding to the right on a track.

Nice!

A fog creeps out and hovers around their knees and covers the entire park. The only thing that stands out from the rotting carnival rides and tents is a small brick building sitting near them by the entrance. A neon sign lights up in the front by the door reading: "Tickets & Gift Shop"

See that?

Like, this place is giving me the creeps already...

The sign flickers a few times then comes back, sounding off a steady hum like a bee's nest.

I guess that's where we're going!

That doesn't look like concessions man!

Fred charges for the building and pushes open the door. The gang follows him inside to see the place is nothing like the outside. A gift shop, just as the sign said, that's clean as a whistle. XWF-Land tee shirts, hats, and other merchandise hang on the walls. There's shelves of bobble heads varying from a blonde haired rockstar to a fat Captain America.

What is this?

Gift shop, I dig it.

Hello, my friends!

An old man sits behind the counter in the back of the building. The whole gang jumps out of their skin and Scooby in Shaggy's arms.

Uh? Hey!

While the gang was certainly happy to see another face... Though charming.... the warmest welcomes didn't come across through this one. The old timer had an eye out and his face and bald scalp were covered with wrinkles, burns, cuts, and bruises. A large cigar is pinched between his yellow stained grin while he stares an icy glare through them with his one good eye.

Uhh.. Yeah... We were just passing through and seen the sign?

We solve mysteries.

What's the deal with your carnival, guy? You're this Shane , I take it?

Who ME? HAHAHAHAHA! No, not at all. I think Shane is dead, actually. I'm not sure.

The gang look at each other.

And there is nothing wrong with XWF-Land, it is just CURSED.

K-K-K-K-K-Cursed???

Indeed.

Uhhh.. Okay? What do you mean "CURSED"?

It is doomed! Doomed to a fate of unimaginable horror if SOMEONE doesn't do something about it!

Sounds intense. We'll do it.

We'll do what?

Do something about it?

Daphne sighs and looks back to the old man who is now gone from his post, but a large, red metal door has appeared behind him.

Like, where'd he go?

I don't know, but I bet we should go through that door.

Like, you guys do whatever.... We got what we came for...

Shaggy says this as he and Scooby head for the entrance carrying arm fulls of bags of popcorn and cotton candy.

We'll be waiting in the van!

Rah! Rits rall roo, rude....

When they reach the door, however, it is locked and will not open. Shaggy pushes and pulls over and over again.

We're, like.... LOCKED IN!

Great. Now we don't have a choice.

The red door creaks open slowly and the gang are slowly drawn to it. One-by-one they step through into a small room where a couple rows of theatre seats are lined up waiting for them.

A show?

Like, sweet! At least we're actually prepared for something this time!

Scooby jumps and lands in a chair, followed by Shaggy where they both start digging into their own bag of popcorn. Daphne, Fred, and Velma all follow in order and take a seat and, as they do, the lights dim and a screen rolls down in front of them. A projector behind them starts clattering and the screen lights up with flickers of light until a picture comes with a jerk to the sound which is still apparently played from a record. The XWF logo flickers on the screen for a few seconds and it goes black again.

Didn't they forget the "E"?

Shhhh!

The picture comes back and a silhouette of a man sits behind a large desk in a cloud of cigar smoke. Like a smog it covers the ceiling while the glowing cherry is the only significant color in the picture. In a raspy voice... The figure speaks.

Hello my friends. What you are about to witness is a sigh of relief. One of those sighs after steering away from a possible head-on collision. One of those sighs after getting a call from your physician and it being 'nothing'...... One of those sighs that follow a slight feeling of hope.

Hope. That's not typically something that the good doctor is associated with, is it? I've always been looked at as the guy you want to stay away from. The man that'll corrupt or ruin whatever it is precious and you hold dearest. The deceptive, devious, demonic, diabolical menace that EVERYONE is afraid to admit makes them feel a little funny. A little weak in the knees.... A little pee in their pants.

Like, check, check, AND check!

My name alone could silence a room, 'Wait, ssshhh.... What'd they say about, Doc?' My voice echoes off of everyone. And my cigar smoke will forever stain the walls of the XWF. It's been such a long time since anything this nice has just fallen onto our laps, has it not? I've been around for quite some time and I don't recall too many things doing just that. Considering the circumstances here and looking forward I believe this here could be some of the highest stakes of all time. The winner of this thing becomes UNIVERSAL Champion and who... HMMMMMM JUST WHO do you think is creeping in the shadows the entire time fantasizing of himself before springing out like a creep and ruining my moment? He calls it causing chaos, I call it annoying. I call it an extreme cry for attention because he can't accomplish it the right way. Did you guess who it was yet? The one who wins this stupid thing isn't only crowned the champ, but they're also responsible to make sure that Chris Chaos will never be the XWF Universal Champion again.

The big red metal door slams shut with a BANG! The gang are all sucked back in their chair and are bound to them by leather straps that swing around their wrists, waists, and ankles.

HEY! LET US OUT!

Yeah, creep! Turn it off! We're done!

I really don't think any of you really knew what you were getting into... None of you understand just how high the stakes truly are. I cannot rely on anyone, ANYONE else to walk away UNIVERSAL Champion. You've all relied on me once before. You relied on me to take this most FINE federation up from its previous crippled state and raise it up to the strong, vibrant place that it TRULY CAN BE. Your Chris Chaos's, your Lux's, your Robert Mains's, and Chris Page's..... The Fuzz's, Soldiers, Thaddeus's and his daddy Sebastian. They will all SSSSTRRRRIIIIIIVE to be better. To reach places they thought they could never reach. To try harder than they have EVER tried. But mostly, this is for you Mister Loverboy.

Is he talking to me?

The silhouette sighs and pushes a button which releases Fred from his restraints but opens a chute below where we falls with a hellish scream. Daphne matches that scream as well as Scooby and Shaggy with a mouthful of popcorn. The silhouette rests its hands again on the desk and--

Hey ASSHOLE! What the fuck are you doing?! LET US----

The shadow quickly presses another button sending Daphne down a separate hole.

Any MORE interruptions?

Velma continues to sit quiet and still while Shaggy and Scooby shake their heads vigorously.

You SAVED the XWF once, didn't you? You saved this precious federation from the constant overcast. Those cold days. The darkness. You painted a perfect, pretty picture for the world and you've kept it in your pocket this entire time.

Scooby and Shaggy have been reaching with their open paws and feet at the open bag of popcorn lying just out of reach when the shadow sweeps all of the buttons sending Velma and Shaggy down. Scooby runs in the air for a moment before snatching the bag of popcorn and falling down the hole himself.

A plague is headed to the XWF now, Mister Lane. A sickness. A curse. A stench that we know now that we couldn't possible stand to endure again. We know what we're up against and we know that it will be so annoying. Who would have thought that the same darkness you thought you abolished and did away with so long ago would be the protection you need from all the chaos.......

*SIGH*

It's my turn now.....
























..... To save the XWF.