The gravel is always loose in cemeteries. I never understood that.

I shuffle along, a week away from yet another match with my demon, the man that has haunted my dreams for the better part of 2 years. I kick up stones as my shoes scuff the dirt and gravel, heading to nowhere in particular. My hands were buried in my pockets, my fingers pushing around the lint and assorted change. There was a little hole starting in one of the pockets. I could probably put the tip of my finger through it.

There was a slight breeze. It felt nice through my hair. In the distance there was a car engine, and some sirens. Daily life going on around me as I walked into the void.

*burn it down*

I put my hand on my head. The voices couldn't start up, not today. I had a headache. Slight, but noticeable.

*gasoline. fire. char. smoke*

I tried my hardest to ignore it. There were some cars parked at the edge of the cemetery, clearly those coming to visit their love ones lost. I remember the last time I was at one of these, I dug up Barney Green's old wench. Oh, those were the days.

People always came to these places and spoke to the headstones. Did they really think anybody could hear them? It's always amusing me to see what comforts the human psyche.

I continued to shuffle along. I was getting closer to the family in the car, who was now kneeling down in front of a grave stone with several flowers on the top of it. Poor bastard must have been freshly dead.

*kill them* this time it was almost a hiss. I beat it back as best I could.

I was feeling a bit light headed, that was a trend for me lately. Maybe I'd sit down for a few, against a tree. Watch the cars. Watch the people.

Relax.

Man, I forgot what it feels like to relax.

My back sat up against the rough tree bark, my ass and upper thighs in the dirt and grass. My hair was down over my face, I took a big breath and let out an exhale.

Man, I forgot what it feels like to relax.

As the time went on, and the birds chirped around me and the squirrels frolicked in the trees, I began to feel a little different. My hands got a little numb, my eyes began to feel heavy.

Maybe I'd take a nap, a nice little recharge.

*they're gone. this is your chance. burn.it.down*

My eyes shot open. My tongue felt like cabbage, as if my mouth was stuffed with cotton. I stood up, I needed to keep moving. I couldn't let it sneak up on me again.

Let him.

Let it.

It, because whatever this thing is, its not human, its not me.

I couldn't help but look over at the grave stone those people were just at as I shuffled by it. It was a trap, a forever trap. Once you were in one of those holes, it defined you. You were there forever, and there was no getting out.

Despite the warm temperature, I had chills. The hair stood up on my arms.

I saw myself laying in there. The trap I had been put into, the hole I could not get out of. I saw the dirt that covered this new forever home like the dirt that was currently on my name......weighing heavy on my shoulders........I shut my eyes but the image would not leave.

*burn it down*

I opened my eyes, there was no gasoline nearby, thank god. I tried to will my legs to walk forward. All they did was noodle. I dropped to my knees and buried my face in my hands.

It was as if 50 voices were shouting at me at once......all blended into one. Like a mashup of screams, the voices all my own.

By the time the voices stopped, my fingernails bled. The blood mixed with the soil under my nails, I felt the fresh dirt on my face. The box that lay in front of me....the box.....the lair.....the hole.....the trap.........

I pried it open. A crow cawed at the same moment, but as soon as the coffin opened the voices finally died down.

I was breathing heavy. I felt free.

That's when I heard a vibration. My head snapped to the right, and there sat a phone. One of them must have left it. Second later I heard a car crunching up the gravel road. I snapped off a piece of the casket handle and gripped it tight.

I had nothing else left in my life but to fight. Succeed or fail, I was going for broke.

All I had left was the truth