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X-treme Wrestling Federation » Anarchy Boards » Anarchy RP Board
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The Star in Stripes
Author Message
Lacklan Offline
World's best at making murderhobos cry



XWF FanBase:
The 'cool' kliq fans

(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty while setting the trends)


#1
07-02-2020, 04:34 PM



“...finally…”

Sarah Selena Grey-Lacklan falls onto her bed with enough force to send the multitude of pillows flying and the tall drapes of red and purple silk attached to the tall masts swinging. The bedroom of the Grey-Lacklans is as opulent as ever, a large room with furniture crafted in the Modern fashion of sleek lines and contrasting colors, along with dozens of pictures along the walls, each featuring some member of the family or friend. Dressed in a gown of black with blue highlights, Sarah buries her face in the mattress with hopes of passing out into the Abyss for all of eternity. Back on the road, back to her “freelancer” roots, meant constant travel and too many matches, and the first night at home in the Egg without work was a wonder tho-

AM I BLEEDING?

AM I BLEEDING FROM THE STORM?!

Sarah groans into the bed as her phone blares to life.

JUST SHINE A LIGHT INTO THE WRECKAGE

SO FAR AWAY

AWWWWWAAAAAAYYYYYYY


She pushes herself up off the bed and reaches for her phone, lithe fingers desperately trying to shut off the alarm, and sighs deeply when she sees the notification:

Anarchy Promotional Video

“...goddamnit…”

Sarah sits up in the bed, rearranges the pillows behind her so that she is propped up, presses a few buttons on her phone, and flashes her Billion $$$ Smile-

but then fatlers. She takes a moment to reach into her purse and pull out a strip of red and purple:

The mask Ruby handed her after their escape from Area 51.

Sarah looks at the mask for several moments and shakes her head.

”Sorry Rubes...I already have a mask...you just don’t know it, yet…”

She tosses aside the mask, flashes her Billion $$$ Smile and-

[Image: LgF28GC.gif]

HIIIIII-iiiiiiii!

This is your reason for being, the salt that makes your guacamole pop, the owner of the squat booty which Kimmie Kardashian...I call her Kimmie...WISHES she had Sarah Lacklan-


((cue: ascending piano notes))

-MARKETING GENIUS, and…

wait

wait

Something’s not quite right. Like, something’s changed since I first flopped onto my bed after a HELLISH week of wrestling that included me going 3-0 across 3 companies and picking up some garbage title and right this moment. What is it? Oh! Wait! That’s right! Un instant s'il vous plaît.



[Image: MJkfpOh.gif]

-MARKETING GENIUS annnnnnnnnnd YOUR Federweight Champion!

Tommy still desperately trying to save face with some shitty interviews? Pretty pathetic.

N-E-Ways, my job for Anarchy this time, because SOMEONE decided to withhold your dosage of kickassocity this week, is putting on the stripes and being a referee for the next Anarchy Championship match between Rubes and Graves.

Know what’s funny? When I as the Anarchy Champion, I was only booked against TOP TALENT (Noah, Vita, Rubes), and suffered shitty comments of “ERMAHGERD YOU NEVER DEFENDS HER TITLE” from the peanut gallery, but when RUBY gets the title, she gets softball bullshit like Barney Fucking Green and Graves. Interesting how THAT works out, huh?

N-E-Ways! You probably want to know about my ability, my skills, my AUTHORITY to be a referee. Well, ladies and gentlemen, I have it for you. My experTISE in being a referee is backed up by my inSANE amount of match-calling I have done! And HOW MANY matches have I called in my 3 ½ year career?

Zip.

Zero.

Zilch.

This is the FIRST TIME I will be putting on the pinstripes. BUT! In the aforementioned 3 ½ years, I have wrestled a STAGGERING 185 times...and that’s with several months on the DL! I wrestle a LOT, which means I know ALL the rules. And, Vinnie and Anarchy be damned, I am going to call this match DOWN THE MIDDLE. There WILL be:

5 counts for illegal maneuvers!

10 counts for fighting outside the ring!

Auto DQ for forcibly throwing your opponent over the top rope and to the floor!

Auto DQ for laying your hands on me for ANY REASON WHATSOEVER!

CLEAN rope breaks!

AND MORE!

So, don’t worry all of you fans of CLEAN wrestling out there, this one WILL be the BEST match every in the history of Anar-




*CRIME ALERT*

*CRIME ALERT*


Oh noes!

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*


Sarah is the Best, Sarah Number One
OMG, Ruby! There seems to be some petty crime happening! SOMEONE has to stop them before its TOO LATE!


Super Dear’o
On my way, buddy!



.......................

Okay, I think Ruby’s not watching this any more.

Hey! Michael! Dude! Listen, ignore everything I just said. Literally everything. I am 100% open to taking bribes. Want me to look the other way when you cheat? Sends me some bills! Want me to “not” see that foreign object? Get me dat SHOE money! Want to WIN that Anarchy Championship at ANY cost? Just send me your credit card info and-

WHERE THE FUCK IS DOLLY?!

Beloved! What are-


((phone shakes and image of Sar is replaced by a VERY Angry Black Woman))

What the FUCK did you do with Dolly, you sick freak?! Do you realize how my FUCKING STUPID interns I have had to deal with since you stole Dolly? I lost count! Give me my assistance back or I'll rip off you dick and shove it up your ass so far that you'll be-

Wow! That's all we have for tonight, Baby Birds! See you on Thurs-


I WILL FUCK YOU UP GRAVES
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"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (07-08-2020)




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