Atara Themis
- vs -
Geri Miller Submissions Match!
Zane Norrison
- vs -
Amjetkun Socio Mini Morbid on a Pole Match!
Mini will be dangling from a pole above the ring. Once he is retrieved by one of the combatants, he may be used as a weapon!
Maverick
- vs -
Calvary X-Treme Rules!
Boris
- vs -
Barney Green Glass Bottom Boat Ride Match!
The ring will be surrounded by a makeshift lagoon with several glass bottom boats floating around it. The winner must put his opponent through a glass bottomed boat!
Noah Jackson & Vita Valenteen
- vs - Ruby & Fuzz
Kalel Drake
- vs -
Zane Norrison
Jenny Myst is seen in the back talking to Kalel Drake. It seems to be a bit of a pep talk.
Jenny: "Giirrrrlll you've got this. Zane is a tool, and you're a Chaotic Blonde! Plus, he's got two matches tonight, you know he isn't going to be fully focused on you."
Kalel takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly.
Jenny: This is the beginning of something beautiful babe.......you're XWF career has finally begun!
Jenny was about to say something else when Kalel cut her off.
Kalel: Jenny, babe, that's all gravy but this isn't my first match ever. Cut the umbilical cord.
Jenny blushes.
Jenny: Sorry.
Kalel: Also....I need you to do me a favor. A big favor. Please.
Jenny: Anything hun...what is it?
Kalel takes another deep breath.
Kalel: Win lose or draw, I need to do this myself. Please, as a friend, I am asking you to stay back here. Do not get involved.
Jenny seems a bit deflated, as if her plans were suddenly crashing down.
Kalel: Please.
Jenny smiles, even though it seemed forced.
Jenny: You got it. Go get em, sport!
She pats Kalel on the shoulder as she turns to head towards the entrance.
Vinnie Lane: "Uh oh....trouble in paradise already for the longtime friends it seems...........oh well?"
Zane Norrison appears from behind the curtain. He doesn't seem to have an expression on his face as he walks to the ring.
Vinnie Lane: Creepy dude right here, but a lot of experience. He has his hands full tonight...we'll see how he handles it.
The green strobes eventually stop, and the lights go off for a few seconds.
Fog rises from around the ramp when "The Ghost" by NIVIRO begins while the lights are out. Lights slowly flash on the entrance to the arena while the talking echos. The beat drops and lights flash all over the area. Kalel runs from the back and begins jumping on the stage before skipping down the ramp sticking her tongue out then jumping at the end of the ramp
Vinnie Lane: Yep, this woman is bat-shit crazy! I called it, where's my 50 bucks!
Kalel walks up to the apron before looking up at her opponent.
Kalel pulls herself onto the apron before climbing onto the rope and sitting while bounces slightly
Kalel then enters the ring and does a small dance
She turns her attention to her opponent before rolling her eyes and walking over to the corner of the ring. She jumps between the ropes once again and sits watching for the match to begin.
The bell rings and the two unique entities circle each other. Kalel, making her XWF debut, doesn't hesitate. She comes right out of the gate and charges the zombie, firing of a barrage of punches and kicks which back him into a corner. She continues with her series of kicks and punches, yelling out with a crazed roar. Zane, out of desperation to stop the onslaught, connects with an uppercut that knocks the chaotic blonde out of the corner and sends her stumbling back towards the middle of the ring.
Vinnie Lane: "That's gonna hurt. He had to do something though. Kalel starting fast here....."
Zane shakes off the assault and grabs Kalel, hitting a leg sweep which takes her off her feet. She pops right back up though and shoots him an intense look. He grins.
Wait... what's this??
The camera reveals none other than SUPER SHAMELESS SHANE peeking out from the back. He slowly walks out but stops midway down the aisle and crosses his arms while he watches Kalel's ass.
Zane charges for a clothesline, but with a nifty Matrix Evasion, Kalel ducks down and her spine almost touches the ring. She pops back up as Zane comes off the ropes the other way. She hits a drop kick to the chest which takes the undead one down. Picking him up by the head she knees him in the gut and locks him in a bulldog hold. Putting her arm up and yelling out to nobody in particular, she runs, climbing the ropes, spins in mid air and hits a bulldog in the center of the ring.
Vinne Lane: Impressive......most impressive.....
She hooks the leg.....
1
2
Zane gets a shoulder up.
Kalel slaps the mat and yells at the ref that that was 3! He shakes his head and holds up two fingers.
Vinnie Lane: "She is going to need to do a lot more than that to put away a veteran like Zane Norrison......I can't believe I just said that outloud."
Picking him up again, Kalel whips him back into the corner. Running at him, she connects with a splash that stumbles him out.....he turns back towards her........spin kick! She drills him right in the face!
Kalel goes for the cover.
1
2
Again Zane gets the shoulder up. Again Kalel yells at the ref.
Vinnie Lane: "She has been impressive so far....but I think Jenny Myst is rubbing off on her a little........"
Picking Zane up by the head a third time, he counters with a rake to the eye. Kalel holds her face as he comes off the ropes, turning the newcomer damn near inside out with a clothesline. Kalel flips in the air and lands on her back. Zane grins.
Shane is once again seen watching from the aisle, and now he's got a pair of binoculars up to his face. Each time any sort of move happens that involves Kalel bending over, Shane smiles even bigger.
Picking her up by her hair now he fires of a few shots before kneeing her in the gut and planting her with a DDT.
Zane hooks the leg...
1
2
Kalel kicks out.
Camera's pan to the back where Jenny Myst is watching the match on a big 4k TV screen (thanks Vinnie!), biting her nails in anticipation.
Back to the ring.
Both of them are on their feet. Zane goes for a standing clothesline, Kalel ducks. She goes for another spin kick. He catches her leg. When he does, a little bit of her ankle is exposed between her shoe and the bottom of her wrestling tights. Zane looks at it and licks his lips. Kalel looks disgusted. Just as it looks like he is about to bite her, she comes around with an Enzuigiri to the side of the head. Zane stumbles off and falls into the ropes, his torso hanging over the top rope. Shoving him off and to the mat below, she backs up into the center of the ring. Sticking her tongue out, its blue, she puts and arm up.
Vinnie Lane: Drake has high-risk written all over her face here. She wants to make a splash in my company....can't say I blame her. But...why's her tongue blue? I mean its like freshly eaten Fun-Dip Blue. Oohhh... I haven't had Fun Dip in a while..........
As Vinnie is talking she runs and jumps, propelling herself over the top rope and onto Zane on the outside. She lands hard though, and both are down on the outside.
Both get to their feet, using the apron for leverage. Zane charges, Kalel ducks.
MODIFIED STO on the mat! The thud was sickening! But Zane doesn't stay down......Kalel seems astonished. She rolls into the ring to break the count, then rolls back out.
She grabs his head and rams it into the steel steps on the outside, causing him to stumble, but he stays on his feet as she follows him around the outside of the ring.
When they get to the side of the ring, she rolls him into the ring, sliding in behind him. She goes to lift him back up but.........out of nowhere........
DOOMED NATION!
THE POP UP POWER BOMB CONNECTS! Kalel drake is flat out!
Zane goes to one knee though. Does he have enough left to make a cover in time?! He shakes his head again, opening his eyes wide a few times. He slides into the cover.
Vinnie: This could be it here..........a boy can dream, right?
1
2
3---KALEL GETS A SHOULDER UP!
At the last moment Kalel kicks out. Zane rolls over with his hands on his face. Kalel is wincing, reaching for her back.
The opening match continues as the crowd seems energized now. Kalel is grabbing the ropes to pull herself up. Zane is on one knee.
Kalel gets a crazed look on her face. Zane has his typical grin.
She charges and Zane catches her, planting her back first to the mat with a spinning spine buster!
Vinnie Lane: "That's gotta do it!"
He bounces off the ropes, Don't Fear The Reaper (lionsault)......................
KALEL GETS THE KNEES UP!
Out of desperation Kalel got her knees up and Zane is rolling, holding his midsection.
Back to his feet, Kalel is up. A kick to the gut....
She goes to jump over, setting up the Me-OW but Zane counters......
He rolls her up....
Zane's got the tights!
1
2
3!
Winner by Pinfall - Zane Norrison
Kalel pops up, shocked, running a hand through her hair. Zane rolls out of the ring.
Vinnie Lane: Good start for Zane here with the meatheat next. Kalel looked good in her debt though. Bright future, blondie!"
It looks like Kalel Drake is finally realizing Shane 's been watching her. She locks eyes with Shane's binoculars as Shane just very slowly starts backing up without taking the binocs' focus off of her breasts.
Shane: "Good match! Looking forward to wrestling with you and Jenny soon!"
Shane's waving happily with a big ol' grin. Yes the binocs are still aiming at Kalel's boobies. Shane backs all the way away back to the back, backwards.
Jenny is seen in the back with a smile. Looking upset for Kalel, she seems proud of her effort.
Tommy Wish
- vs -
Driller Jaworski
Walks slowly down to the ring, looking at the fans as if he wants to grab each of them and break their necks
As the riff starts to play on the X-Tron, the camera pans around the arena, and it captures Tommy in the aisle way; and he taunts to the crowd as he walks down the stairs from them. He then hops over the barricades, and slides into the ring, and sits on the corner as his theme cuts off.
As the bell rung, Tommy see’s the imposing Driller, as Driller signals to him that he’s going to die; Tommy shrugs his shoulders at the hard cam. Then they lock up, and Driller pushes Tommy who rolls. Tommy goes to lock up again, and he rolls on his back again; Driller grabs Tommy by the hair and chops him with his massive hands. Tommy holds chest in pain, and Driller kept chopping him until he goes to the corner.
Driller then Foot Chokes Tommy in the corner, and Driller grit his teeth as Tommy eyes rolls back into his head. As the ref makes Driller break the choke, Driller then strangles and rattles Tommy head, then Driller breaks it off as Tommy is gasping for air. Driller then punts Tommy in the ribs, then he does it again; as Tommy is holding his rib in pain, Driller then taunts to the crowd who boo the shit out of him.
VL: Man, Tommy is really getting it against Driller. Looks like it’s going to be quick match tonight!
Driller lifts up Tommy and Irish Whips him to the ropes and connects with a Big Boot. Tommy stumbles around the ring, and Driller position him for the Fallaway Slam. As Driller holds him, he walks around the ring mouthing off the fans, as Tommy is screaming for help. Then Driller stops at the middle of the mat, and tosses him like a rag doll. As Driller gave off a cold menacing smile, Tommy is convoluting in pain from the Slam.
Driller then get on his feet, and he lifts up Tommy and does a Arm wrench. As Driller kept wrenching his left arm, Tommy is slapping his shoulder trying to not sub come to the hold; as Driller kept wrenching it even harder, Tommy almost passes it out. But something inside made him break the hold, and he manages to reverse it into a Hammerlock, but due to Driller’s size Tommy ended up falling backwards.
Tommy sits on the corner, trying to make a plea towards god, as Driller slowly comes up to him.
VL: I don’t know what gotten into Tommy, but it looks like he’s actually afraid of Driller. I wouldn’t blame him.
Driller comes to the corner, and Tommy manages to Drop Toe Hold him onto the top turnbuckle. As Driller is holding his nose, Tommy punches him in the gut and goes for a Enziguri, which connects onto Driller. As Driller is on his one knee holding his head, Tommy charges to the ropes and gives a Big Boot on Driller’s face and goes for the cover…
KICKOUT
Driller tosses Tommy to the outside floor, where he sold like a fish out of water. Driller then goes to the ropes, and goes to the apron. Driller gets on the floor, and lifts Tommy in a Powerslam hold and tosses him inside the ring. Tommy flails like he fell off a cliff in pain in the ring, and Driller comes back into ring. Driller then mounts on Tommy, and starts to dish out Lesnar like Elbow’s onto Tommy’s head.
VL: Oh man, Driller is being a killer here tonight against Tommy. Those elbow are dangerous; I wouldn’t want to mess with Driller in any alleyways.
The ref see’s Tommy busted open, and tries to remove him from Tommy. Driller refuses and kept elbowing him, and the ref physically pushed him off him. As Driller get on his feet, he shouts at the ref. Then the camera pans to Tommy sliding on the outside, and he slowly grabs a chair from underneath.
As Driller finished his tirade, he turns around and gets blasted by a Chair in the face. Tommy kept slamming the chair on his face until he was knocked out. The ref tries to snatch the chair from Tommy, but clocks him in the face with it. Tommy then licks his own blood from his busted skull, then he see’s Driller getting up and blast him with another Chairshot to the face.
VL: Oh boy, not only Tommy is such creepy man who likes my girlfriend’s feet, he sure does love taking punishment and dishing it back to others. The ref could call a DQ, but he’s laid the F*** out!!
Tommy then props the folded chair into the seated position, and he waits for Driller to get on his feet. Tommy grabs his arm, and whips him to the ropes and Drop Toe Hold him onto the seated chair. Tommy taunts a “HideYaFace” towards Driller, and the fans are riled up about it. Tommy then lifts up Driller and kicks him in the gut and tries to go for a J-Bomb but struggled to lift up Driller, that caused him to be Back Body Dropped on the mat.
Driller then folds up the chair, and threatens Tommy with it. Driller strikes it, but misses Tommy, and he tries to go at it again, but this time Tommy Spear him while the chair flew out of his hand. Tommy then takes the chair, and puts it on Driller’s left ankle. Tommy then punches him on the mat, and goes to the top rope.
VL: Whatever Tommy is thinking, I don’t wanna know… but that chair on his ankle… wait a m-
Tommy Pillmanize Driller’s ankle…
VL: Tommy is fucking crazy for doing that to Driller! Who can stop this creep from this madness.
As Driller holds his ankle in pain, Tommy just sits on the corner smiling at what he just done. As the ref gets up, he see’s Driller in pain. The ref checks on him, but Tommy gets on his feet and takes the chair off the ankle and tosses it into the crowd. Then the camera pans to one of the lucky fan who got the chair, and it cuts back to Tommy stomping on that ankle.
Tommy then backs away from Driller, and as soon Driller got on his feet, Tommy kicks him in the gut hits a…
HIDEYAFACE
VL: Tommy just put an end to this rookie’s time here in the XWF with his patented HideYaFace, but why isn’t he pin—OH GOD NO!!
Tommy then goes to that injured ankle and locks in…
FETISH LOCK
VL: Oh will he make this rookie tap out tonight?!?
Driller taps out immediately, he might even be crying?
Winner by Embarrassingly Fast Submission - Tommy Wish
Atara Themis
- vs -
Geri Miller Submissions Match!
The arena lights dim and shift color casting the venue in a purple haze while simultaneously the ramp and stage lights turn pink. Hello Doves appears briefly on the X-tron in pink accompanied by Atara's voice saying the same over the arena PA right before Venus by Lady Gaga hits the speakers. The crowd goes apeshit crazy. Arena lights start to pulse in time with the music and multiple vertical streams of pyro erupt across the front of stage as Atara appears from backstage in a full grunge walk to centerstage right before the ramp. Posing for the camera, she blows a kiss before throwing off a silk robe to reveal her attire for the night.
She full on grungewalks to the ring steps and stops at the top to posture once more for the fans before going to the middle of the apron where she blows yet another kiss to the camera before entering the ring very Stacy Kiebler-ish and awaits the start of the match.
Geri Miller walks down to the ring with her belt on her shoulders, she stands in the ramp looking down at the ring, ignoring the fans. As she walks down, she then slides into the ring and poses with her title. Then she hands it over to the ref, and her theme dies down as she stares at Atara.
As the bell rings, the two have a staredown in the middle of the ring, Atara then blows Geri a kiss, but she ended up punching her in the jaw. Geri then locks up Atara and pushes her in the corner, and she then chokes her until the ref counted to four. Geri does it again, and she breaks it up again. Geri then taunts at Atara, with her own blowing a kiss towards her. Atara then hairpulls Geri, and slams her head on the mat. The ref tries to break it up, but couldn’t as she wouldn’t stop slamming her head on the mat.
VL: What a catfight this is folks!
Atara then picks up Geri by the hair, and Irish Whips her to the ropes, and connects with a Spinning Heel Kick. As Geri is dazed, Atara then Forearm Smash her in the face, and she then manages to connect a Japanese Armdrag. Atara then goes for a Chinlock, but Geri manages to power out of the hold by elbowing her gut, and taking her to the ropes. Geri then Whips her to the ropes, and she connects with a stiff punch to her ovaries.
VL: God dang, our Internet Champion is taking too many risks in this match. I’m quite shocked that the ref hadn’t DQ’ed her for that blatant low blow… well actually it doesn’t matter.
As Atara is on the mat in pain, Geri get reprimanded by the ref. Geri then drags Atara to the middle rope, and knee’s her back as Geri bites on the ropes. As she applied pressure on her throat with the middle rope, the ref breaks it up. Geri lets it go, and she is stomping her legs on the mat. Geri tries to lock in a Figure Four, but Atara’s hand are on the bottom rope.
Geri then picks up Atara, and Eye Rakes her and Irish Whip her to the ropes and connect with a Sleeper Hold on Atara. But Atara manages to fight the hold, and she transitions into a Headlock Takedown. Atara locks in the Side Headlock, Geri manages to reach her foot on the lower rope to break the hold. Geri rolls out the ring, and Atara forces her to go back into the ring. Geri then slides into the ring, but pump fakes it back out. Atara then charges out of the ring to hit a Diving Crossbody.
VL: Holy Shoot Atara hits a beautiful Diving Crossbody on Geri. That what she gets for playing outside the ring.
As Atara was pumping up, Geri then clubs her in the back with a Double Axe Handle then she whips her on the barricades. She then whips her to the steel steps, Geri then tosses Atara into the ring. Geri then stomps on her, then turns her over to lock in a Camel Clutch, as she locked it in Geri then stretches as far as she can. As Atara was screaming, Geri then Eye Rakes her a couple of times.
As Geri kept applying pressure on the hold, Atara tries to reach for the ropes. A she reaches for it, Geri bites her shoulder to discourage her. Atara kept reaching, and she finally gets the rope, but Geri ignores the ref’s count until he reached to four. Geri breaks it off, and she lifts her by the hair, and Headbutts her. Then she slams her with a Stalling Suplex.
Geri goes to the corner, and she’s proceeds to tune up the band, and as Atara slowly gets on her feet, she eats a Stoner Superkick that laid her out. Geri then drags her to the corner of the turnbuckle, as she gets on top of the ropes she manages to blow her one last kiss….
MILLER’S TALE!
As she goes for the cover, the ref simply ignores the count. Then Geri then gets in the refs face, and she starts to shove him. Before the ref could even do anything, Atara charges to the ropes and hit Geri with…
Lament of Adonis
As Atara locked in the Armbar, Geri is struggling to reach to the ropes, as she locks it in tightly. Atara then ended up pushing her weight all into the Fujiwara Armbar, and the camera pans to see Geri in pain.
LV: OH MAN, will we Atara break our Internet Champion’s arm tonight?????
Just when it looks like Geri might be about to give up, she finds a burst of energy enough to somehow float over Atara, catching the goddess completely off guard. Geri snares Atara in THE LEAF!!!
Atara struggles and wails in pain, but she’s VERY bendy. Like… like REALLY flexible, guys. It’s actually distracting. Eventually though, Atara’s shoulder seems to pop right out of the socket! The official rushes over and waves the match off, although technically Themis never actually submitted.
LV: Grosssssssssssssss!!!
Winner by Stoppage - Geri Miller
Zane Norrison
- vs -
Amjetkun Socio Mini Morbid on a Pole Match!
Mini will be dangling from a pole above the ring. Once he is retrieved by one of the combatants, he may be used as a weapon!
Zane Norrison, zombie or not, is visibly worn down after the match with Kalel earlier in the night. Socio easily tosses him around to start the match, taking extra time to flex and pose for the crowd.
At one point Socio even gets Zane on his hands and knees and rides him like a burro. Not like a horse, specifically like a burro. It’s different, I promise.
After a while, Mini Morbid starts talking trash, calling Socio a racist towards midgets and accusing him of hate crimes based on what happened in his promo. This gets Socio HARD, and he finally goes and retrieves the diminutive despot from his pole, screaming at him to tell him more about hate crimes so he can bust a huge nut, broh.
The tactic backfires though, as Mini scratches and bites at Socio’s face! Socio screams in a much higher pitch than anyone would expect, but really what’s the proper sound to make when a dwarf is eating your face? Zane watches and cheers Mini on, presumably into the cannibalism and maybe hoping for a scoop of roid brains.
Oops! Soshe gets Mini off (not like that) and tosses him aside, giving him the chance to go back to Norrison… but Zane has recovered enough to put up a fight now. Smartly, Zane stays focused on the injured face of Socio, sending him reeling with a series of hard shots and high impact moves. Socio is stunned and now it’s HIM on his hands and knees, but rather than ride him like a horse or burro, Zane finds Mini Morbid and… holy crap. He… he just… I mean he fit him all the way in there! How?
Socio’s eyes bug out and he starts dancing around, doing a bunch of lunges and squats, anything he can think of to get Mini out of his lower intestine! He’s turning purple in the face, lying on his back and trying to rhythmically flex his abs to push out the anal intruder. It’s a weird peristalsis only possible to those in possession with a minimum of 24 abdominal muscles.
Zane Norrison leaps onto Socio’s shoulders! He scores a three count! Zane Norrison has done the impossible and won two different matches here tonight!
Winner by Pinfall - Zane Norrison
Now, someone get Amjetkun Socio to an OB/GYN… this man is giving birth in the ring!
Maverick
- vs -
Calvary X-Treme Rules!
Vinnie: "Well here we go....this should be a good matchup.......and yes, I said that with a straight face----"
Vinnie laughs audibly.......
When suddenly the lights go out.........
Vinnie Lane: The hell? Someone is getting spoken to about this....
The X-Tron lights up with blue Letters
"FOLLOW ME"
Chris Chaos walks out onto the ramp, looking at the surprised and ecstatic crowd. He walks with a cocky strut down to the ring, around the side, and over to the announce table.
Vinnie Lane: What the hell is he doing here----hey Chris!"
Chaos puts on a headset.
Chaos: Vin man, long time no talk. I dig the haircut.
Vinnie cringes......."thanks"
As the music kicks up, The Calvary can be spotted in the corner of the arena with his chest puffed out. He flies down to the ring before slowly descending onto a turnbuckle where he gives out a mighty bellow. He pounds his chest before stepping down into the ring and cracking his knuckles.
Vinnie Lane: So what brings you out here, on my show, in a match you nor your lady friend are involved in?
Chaos: I am out here because Maverick called me out. He wanted to enter the world of Chaos and now he is reaping the benefits.
The opening riff of Warning by Cymbals Eat Guitars beings playing throughout the stadium, as the fans begin to litter the stadium with both cheers and boos. About twenty- five seconds in, Maverick can be seen bursting through the curtains, a cocky smile seen on his face. He stretches his arms out to the side, hands open- palmed, before raising his head to the heavens. All of a sudden, he turns around, leaving his back facing the ring, before slowly walking backwards to the ring.
Vinnie Lane: You and Jenny have left him laying twice, cost him a match already......hasn't he paid enough? It's getting to be a little much, no?
Chaos: Vinnie, how long have you known me? 4 years now? When have I never been over the top? When have I never been "too much"?
About halfway down the ramp, Maverick faces back towards the ring, and lets his arms down, locking eyes with everybody inside the ring. Bouncing on his feet before giving off a heavy, deep breath, Maverick saunters towards the ring, bouncing his feet off of the steel steps as he gets there. He slowly steps in between the ropes, and paces back and forth, waiting for the match to begin.
Vinnie Lane: Truth. I do vaguely remember you losing the Universal Title, blaming everyone under the sun, including myself, for it, and continuing to whine and bitch about it for the remaining 3 years.......
Chaos: I guess Barney's beating didn't do too much damage to your brain, eh?
The bell rings.
Maverick and Calvary circle. Mav seems a bit on edge, looking over his shoulder constantly and sneaking peeks over to Chaos at the commentary table. The two tie up. The bigger Calvary gets the early advantage, locking Maverick in a headlock. Mav shoves him off. Calvary comes off the ropes, going for a clothesline. Mav ducks, and Calvary comes off the ropes the other way. Mav puts the boot up but Calvary catches it, slamming his foot down and hitting a standing clothesline on Maverick.
Calvary picks him up, whipping him into the corner. Running with a splash, he flattens Mav, who sits down in the corner.
Vinnie Lane: And we saw Finn Kuhn get involved last week. You realize Mav does indeed have some allies? Trust me, I'm shocked too.
Chaos: Vin, Finn doesn't concern me. He is going to get stomped out, yet again, just like he does everytime he gets involved in my business. Hell, Jenny alone has beaten he 3 or 4 times.
Mav and Cav are up, exhanging blows in the ring. Mav ducks a punch and lifts Cav up, dropping him with a suplex.
Keeping his arms locked, he lifts him into another.
Vinnie: All I am saying is you don't need anymore enemies here.
Chaos: You'd be surprised just how many people are getting in line to be part of Chaotic Inc.
Vinnie Lane: You've always been delusional, I didn't think a year off would make a difference.
Calvary is hammering Mav in the corner, a combination of chops, punches, and knees to the gut.
He headbutts Mav, who stumbles out into the corner and down to all fours. Running from the corner, Calvary hits the knee trembler to the temple.
He goes for the cover.
1
2
Mav gets a shoulder up.
Chaos: You've never been a believer.
Vinnie Lane: Much to the contrary, I've been one of your biggest fans. But I believe in what I see, Chris.
Calvary fires off two heavy shots, he has Mav wobbling, then goes to take his head off with a boot to the face. Mav ducks it.
STUNNER
Calvary is down.
Vinnie Lane: So why Mav? Poor little Maverick? You're supposedly top tier, Chris.
Mav rolls into the cover.
1
2
2 1/2
Calvary kicks out.
Chaos: Maverick got in my business, now I am going to take him out of it the only way I know how.
Mav has Calvary in the corner now, he is up on the second rope, firing off punches as the crowd chants the number.
1
2
3
4
5
In unison.
Vinnie Lane: Is it because you can't hang anymore? You can't beat Robert Main, you barely beat Jim Caedus, you won the Hart Title shot at Lethal Lottery but have been hiding from the champion since. You lost to both the champ and the number one contender since......should I mention the chamber.....
The ring shakes after a big suplex from Mav, into the bridge pin.
1
2
Calvary just kicks out.
Vinnie Lane:........so you want to have something to puff your chest about. You are picking on Maverick and wasting time on MY airwaves on a show you weren't invited to and have no business on, trying to prove your point to career mid-carder when you have a Hart Title shot up for grabs on Warfare.....
The ring shakes again as Mav hits another German suplex.
Vinnie Lane: .......you should be focusing on the Hart Title but typical Chris Chaos........it's gotta be all about him all the time......
Mav has Calvary against the ropes, hammering away. Calvary is able to absorb a crazy amount of punishment.
Chaos: You done?
Vinnie: .......actually I am, yes, thank you.
Chaos sees Maverick getting the upper hand. There is a static over the airwaves as he takes off the headset and throws it on the table.
Chaos jumps up on the apron. The ref shares some words, telling him to get down. Calvary is shaken in the corner, catching his bearings. Mav and Chris have a stare down. Just then, more static.
Vinnie pulls Chris off the apron! Chaos lands on his feet. He turns towards Vinnie. Vinnie is pointing to the back.
Chaos: What the hell are you doing?!
Vinnie: I'm trying to help you, damnit. Get out of here.....go focus on being something for once!
These two are arguing face to face when the crowd begins to sneer. The ref is paying attention to those two in the mat, and doesn't see Jenny Myst creeping in behind Maverick.
He waves his arms at it, turning back to Calvary.
Jenny blasts him in the face with the pepper spray!!!! Maverick flails around blinded for a moment when he receives a kick to the gut.
PINK PERFECTION (twist of fate).
Mav is out. Calvary looks Jenny, then at the downed Maverick, then back at Jenny.
Morals prevail as Calvary grabs Jenny by the hair as she tries to leave the ring. The ref turns around and see's Maverick down, Jenny in the ring and Calvary with a handful of blonde and pink pink locks. She has the pepper spray in her hand.
Calvary brings her to the center of the ring. He is upset that she cheated to gain an unfair advantage for him. That isn't what he is about.
Before the ref can call for the bell....
Out of nowhere comes Chaos.
SPEAR!!!!!!!!!!!
The spear damn near broke Calvary in half! Both men are down. The ref calls for the bell.
No Contest
The crowd boos. Jenny is back in this ring, this time with a can of spray paint. She hands it to Chris as he writes CHAOS across the back of his newly-acquired rival.
Vinnie Lane: ....whelp.....that escalated quickly. I'm sure Calvary will have something to say about this.
Chris slides out of the ring and over to the announce table. Slapping the table hard he gets right in Vinnie's face......
Chaos: Now....I'll leave your show. Stay outta my business, Lane, and I'll stay outta yours. Don't end up like Maverick.........."
Just as Chaos turns around.......
Calvary comes off the top rope.
The Crusade!
The diving superman punch connects! Chaos is down.
Vinnie Lane: Whoa! That was rad! I guess Chris and Mav really do have a lot in common! Siiiick.
Calvary backs up the ramp holding his ribs as Jenny attends to Chaos.
The scene cuts to a commercial or the upcoming Savage.
Boris
- vs -
Barney Green Glass Bottom Boat Ride Match!
The ring will be surrounded by a makeshift lagoon with several glass bottom boats floating around it. The winner must put his opponent through a glass bottomed boat!
After an agonizingly long setup, the match itself is kind of a disaster. This is the sort of thing Meltzer has nightmares about. So much awkward brawling and botched spots galore. At one point Barney messes up a suplex and nearly cripples Boris, who jumps up and starts giving Barn the business right in his face, and the official has to separate them.
The crowd groans, boos, and starts chanting CM PUNK about two minutes into the match, with the lone highlight coming when Boris is sent into the water, proving that his track suit really IS waterproof. Luckily his fuzzy hat comes off of his head and lands in the hands of Vinnie Lane at ringside. Those things take forever to dry!
Barney dominates most of the brawling, looking like he has the match firmly in his grasp until he drags Boris into a glass bottomed boat and drapes him in its bottom, then jumps from the apron with a big splash… Boris rolls away, and Barn goes right through the glass, mercifully ending this atrocity of a gimmick. Don’t do this again, Vin.
Winner by Boat Antics - Boris
Noah Jackson & Vita Valenteen
- vs - Ruby & Fuzz
Total domination from Fuzz on Vita Valenteen, as he seems to be the only participant who isn’t hesitant about getting the match underway. He actually seems to enjoy putting a couple boots to Vita, smirking at Noah in the corner as he does it. Noah looks pretty uncomfortable the entire time, maybe because of his thick scarf. Why the heck is he wearing a scarf? Is it cold in the ring? It looks super scratchy.
Eventually Vita tags out to a reluctant Noah Jackson, who is definitely playing the “but you’re my dad” card right now. Fuzz does hesitate. Noah’s “don’t beat me papa” antics seem to be working! Oh, wait. Fuzz grabbed Noah by the scarf… he twirls Noah like a top! The scarf comes off, revealing Noah’s neck covered in hickeys!
Vita turns red in the corner, and Ruby levels a judgmental stare at her from across the ring. Fuzz just rolls his eyes and tags Ruby in, which makes Noah’s jaw drop, since he can’t talk her out of beating that ass.
A Ruby Cutter later, and the main event is in the books.
Winners by Pinfall - Ruby & Fuzz
Special Thanks:
Jenny Myst
Amjetkun Socio
John Black
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"Fuck! Where's a can of green paint when ya need it?!?!"
Title History
3x X-Treme Champion
1x (and 1st ever) North Korean Champion (Now the Television Title/X-Bux Championship)
1x Tag Team Champion (Longest reigning tag team champion @273 days. 231 w/Sebastian Duke and 42 solo)
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peeking out from the back. He slowly walks out but stops midway down the aisle and crosses his arms while he watches Kalel's ass.![[Image: dR5ZguS.png]](https://i.imgur.com/dR5ZguS.png)
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