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Robert "The Omega" Main · (02-21-2020)

Few Days After Savage 2/15/2020

“Did you expect Chaos to do what he did?”

Robert shrugs reaching for Nisha’s hand.

“When it comes to Chaos one should always expect the unexpected, now if I wasn’t a good guy and got off on attaching people from behind. I’d have done the same thing. That’s just not who I am.” Robert moves Nisha’s hair from her face with his index finger. “There is one thing that Chris Chaos and I can agree on, the Robert Main - vs - Chris Chaos saga is over.”

Nisha smiles clutching Robert’s hand.

“The match didn’t last very long, how bad was Page after that slugfest with Slater?”

Robert leered out over New York city placing his one hand on the glass bracing himself. The window is so large it reminds him of a store-front, so high upon one could see in any way? It's triple-glazed and so clear the panorama is like a high definition television. The birds travel past, bludgeoned nearly to death by the winds that whistle through these towers, remind Robert that he was in their space now. This real-estate in the heavens felt so futuristic as the city below seemed so far away it's like another world, those ant-like people and all their dilemmas are of no more consequence than transitory static on an intercom. All this concrete is his cocoon and the window, well, the window shows Robert as much detail as he wanted to know.

“I hope I gave the fans a great show, I hate thinking that I disappointed them, especially when they fork over their hard-earned dollars to come see me. I just didn’t expect Chaos to fold like a dollar store lawn chair from one shot. That ring bell is an underutilized tool. Do you think I delivered?”

“Of course you did babe. You always do.”

Robert shrugs

“Maybe he tossed in the towel? He knew there was no way out, besides on his back. Oh, and Page is doing alright we met up after the show, the guy is one tough son of a bitch. He got medical some attention, few stitches and staples nothing out of the ordinary. He’ll be fine by next Savage.”

The city stretched below them, and the world suddenly felt so broad and free that Robert wanted to jump. Lights shimmered everywhere, like stars falling from the sky to the Earth, the enormous buildings crashed in a mixture of shadows and geometry, as the miniature vehicles scurried along tangled lines of streets creating twisting threads of light. They all merged in a magnificent mess of dreams, a brilliant, mind-blowing, dream that made Robert feel like some factitious replica instead of a living breathing thing.

“Did you watch the Jenny Myst promo?”

Robert nods rolling his eyes before replying.

“I did.” Robert sighs. “Brain cells were officially killed off. Unlike Chris Chaos or Jenny, I watch other promos besides my own. Why? Well for one I’ll know what’s going on around the XWF. It’s a respect thing, I may love the promo or hate it, but I watch it anyway. That way I don’t stick my foot in my mouth like these two do, damn near every week. Their promos are becoming Peter Gilmourish.”

“Chaotic Inc? The most dominant force the XWF has ever seen?”

Robert interjects waving his hands in the air

“The most dominate force the XWF has ever seen is The Kings & APEX period. When the dust settles, Page and I will be up there as well, two out of three isn’t bad.”

“The Chaotic Blondes are supposedly going to become Tag Team Champions. These two don’t pay attention, do they?”

“It’s a sickness these two have suffered from since day one. It goes in one ear and out the other if they even hear it at all. They want a shot at those belts, fine, they’ll just have to wait until after Page and I are finished obtaining them first.”

Robert let go of Nisha’s hand placing his forehead on the glass watching time fade away right before his eye. Observing New York city from the top floor penthouse gave Robert perspective, the concrete jungle was nothing more than a jumble of shapes like a small child had tossed blocks down randomly and then swept them close together. There were rectangles, domes and mini-castles. There were spires, weather vanes and satellite dishes. Between the dwellings and businesses, the roads below are so narrow they frequently became blocked by pedestrians. Suddenly there is a vibration from Roberts pocket. As he leers down opening the message from Page, he can only laugh out loud.

“Well… I know our opponents for Savage.”

“What’s so funny about that?”

“You ever heard of Afton Pepper or Vic Vinegar?” Nisha shakes her head. “Neither has anyone else in the business. We go from co-main event to smack dab in the middle of the card? I should be outraged honestly. But I’m not. The March Madness tournament is the highlight of this week’s Savage. So me being the good guy that I am I’ll hype some of those matches right now before I rip Pepper and Vinegar new rectums. ”

Robert turns facing the camera crossing his arms.

“First match Viper - vs - Jaye two new bloods here in XWF. I’m not going to choose. First welcome to the XWF, and secondly good luck in your match. I’ll be watching and rooting for each of you.”

Robert pauses

“Next up we have Jim Jimson - vs - Tony Montana.. Wait I mean Hanari Carnes.. Ugh… Give me Carnes. Oh, and if anyone has an issue with any of my picks please feel free to come find me.”

Robert winks at the camera

“Phantom Panzer - vs - Jessalyn Hart.. I’ll take Deadly Jester even though I’m not a huge fan of clowns.. Are they even the same thing? Clown and Jester..? Okay, what’s next?”

Nisha speaks up

“Scully - vs - Zeebo The Clown.”

“Not taking two clowns in a row, give me Scully even though the guy couldn’t wrestle his way out of a wet paper bag. Yeah, I said it. Don’t take offense Scully seriously, I’d hate to have to beat your ass and hurt those sensitive feelings.”

“Madison Dyson - vs - Boris.”

Robert chuckles

“Boris I love Vodka man, I’d love to share a few bottles with ya sometime soon. But I’m going to have to go with Madison here. I don’t want to… But… Yeah.. The hilarious thing is, several weeks ago, Page and I both chewed on the idea of entering March Madness at length, we both decided against the idea. With the new prospects and a few returning guys and gals sprinkled in. I didn’t need to stroke my ego smashing their dreams, taking something away from our newer talent or even a guy who could use a shot in the arm. This whole tournament can alter careers in a positive light. Page and I didn’t need to make this about either of us, the latter part of 2019 was about us, so we decided to sit this one out. Why not let some of the other talent shine for once? Why not give another person a chance to become more than what they are now? That was going to happen, and it would have been enjoyable to watch. Then the buzz kill swooped in and killed the entire freaking thing. Enter the rainstorm over the XWF’S head. Madison! Don’t trip over that oversized ego sweetheart when you win, welcome to irrelevance like or heroic Universal Champion.

Robert sinkers

[orange] “Like shooting fish in a barrel of monkeys Jesus. Anyway Barney Green - vs - Geri Miller.. Uh.. I’ll take Geri. Thunder Knuckles - vs - The Calvary? Give me TK dude has a priceless mullet. Mastermind - vs - Kieran Overton? Overton for sure. Mastermind just sucks. BigD - vs - Finn Kuhn? BigD fuck Finn Kuhn!”

Robert points to the camera.

“I meant what I said Finn fuck you.. Atara Themis - vs - Red-X? Atara Themis without a doubt Why? Well, it’s simple, I like her tweets for starters, secondly, she’s cute as a button.”

Nisha folds her arms

“Cute as a button huh?”

“Relax darling. Hell, I doubt Red-X will show up for the show let alone wrestle. How haven’t you been fired yet? Who’s next let’s see.. Robbie Bourbon - vs - "The" Tristan Slater. Robbie Bourbon will keep Slaters losing streak alive and well. Did someone say Robbie was gay now? Weird.”

Robert scratches his head.

” Fuzz © - vs - Azrael Erebus? I’ll go with our Champion here, even though he can’t seem to commit to anything besides the Azrael Erebus’s of the world.”

Robert gestures he’d like a yes or no on the Tag Title match at March Madness followed by a middle finger.

“And finally Noah Jackson © - vs - the biggest Jackass in wrestling today Peter Gilmour. Noah is going to steamroll Peter in another unproblematic match. Hey Noah, why not come out from underneath daddies skirt and have a real match? You know one with real threats in the ring, one where you guys are BOTH facing real athletic prowess?”

“Are you forgetting something?”

Robert shakes his head.

“No I don’t believe so? Why?”

“You and Page have a match? Promo… Hello,”

Robert has an oh yeah moment.

“Oh yeah, Nisha do you think I need to cut a promo on those two?”

Nisha nods pointing to the camera

“Ugh.. Fine! Afton Pepper, Vic Vinegar have you ever held a grenade in the palm of your hand?”

Robert takes a moment to let that question sink in.

” The grenade has one purpose. Extermination. Every single aspect of it was designed for this singular goal, from its metal exterior to the gunpowder inside. Facing Page and I are like holding a couple of hand grenades in your hands with the pin pulled. The longer you wait, the more likely we will blow up in your face. Before you know it, it’ll feel like someone just whacked both of you in the back with a baseball bat. As the burning shrapnel known as The Dead Man’s Hand or Page Plant hit’s those frail bodies, you’ll know how much danger you’re really in. Once you come to seeing the smoke billowing into the air, surrounded by fire you’ll know then and only then you were just another casualty. The two of you decided to dive in headfirst without a life jacket. Didn’t you realize that this was the deep end of the pool?

A pool Page and I now own by the way. This is where the sharks swim boys, where the big fish hang out. Signing up for this confrontation was an ill-advised move on your part, it's laughable that you thought you even had a chance at obtaining a win against us. Stepping into the ring with Cataclysm might just be the most irresponsible move you could have ever made. Epically if you want to continue with this career path. Our entire careers Page and I have never felt a nervous tension no matter how substantial or microscopical the match. Robert Main and Chris Page will always rise to the top, and we’ll never play down to opponents like the two of you. What you will get is the same bold, pioneers willing to risk life and limb just to get another victory. Management threw you two to the wolves if they said you’d be okay. They lied. Once we’re done picking over the bone’s you boys can take that up with them.”

Robert turns his back to the camera before speaking one last time.

“This might be a Savage Prediction..” Robert looks over his shoulder at the camera “Cataclysm will demolish the dick’s known as The Spice Rack. The two of you were going to get dismantled eventually, why not have the best in the business vaporize you?”

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