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X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » "C*nt Fest" RP Board
FUN Wrestling Returns
Author Message
Prof. Bobby Bourbon Offline
Mad Scientist



XWF FanBase:
The 'cool' kliq fans

(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty while setting the trends)


#1
01-12-2020, 10:36 PM

The latest and greatest company in wrestling, FUN Wrestling, shattered expectations with their debut episode!

The fun has just begun!

FUN WRESTLING RETURNS

A helicopter flies overhead, the makeshift encampment below thriving with activity.

In the center of the camp is, of all things, a ring, set up with hundreds, possibly thousands, all seated and ready to watch a wrestling show, including a bunch of mole men. Signage everywhere says this show is being put on by one company.

[Image: 63J3yoY.png]

FUN Wrestling takes the air again with another night of exciting FUN action.

Dixie plays as Colonel Ashburn "Hem n' Haw" Peckinpah struts down to the ring in his standard get up. The crowd is eating it up as Peckinpah enters the ring. He grabs a microphone.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to FUN Wrestling!

The crowd cheers. As they do, music plays!



Vita Valentine steps through the makeshift entrance wearing a Hawaiian shirt, a straw hat, a pair of board shorts, basically dressed just like the Hawaiian Punch guy.

Making her way to the ring, SHARON GECKO!

Sharon Gecko slides into the ring and walks right up to Peckinpah.

I'M SHARON GECKO! I got lost on the way to the arena tonight, then I thought I knew where I was going, but then I got really lost, then I stopped and asked for directions!

What directions did they give you?

The wrong ones! I was totally lost, but somehow, I made it here tonight, are you ready, FUN Wrestling?

The crowd roars in approval.


Sharon Gecko
vs
Sergeant Tom Dewitt




Reveille sounds as Mastermind walks out wearing Vietnam era fatigues and helmet.

Sergeant Tom Dewitt seems ready to take on any enemy here tonight!

STD enters the ring and points out into the crowd, which is cheering. David Ringman bangs the gong.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!

Sharon Gecko sizes up STD. Literally, with a tape measure. STD sizes up Sharon Gecko, figuratively, trying to figure out what she's doing. Peckinpah has removed his white colonel jacket and is in his referee shirt. Peckinpah takes the tape measure from Gecko.

This is an international object! I won't allow it.

No it isn't! It's not even metric!

Peckinpah looks at it then shrugs.

Then I will allow it!

Gecko holds one end of the tailor's tape, and STD grabs the other! They both flank Peckinpah. Robbie looks confused.

Woah, woah, what are you...

STD and Sharon Gecko begin to spin the tape measure, using it as a jump rope. Peckinpah instinctively starts hopping the rope. After two good jumps, STD and Gecko cross over past Peckinpah, binding him in the tape measure! STD reaches into his fatigues and pulls out a paddle, whacking Robbie square in the ass.

What the fuck! Stop that shit!

STD gets on his hands and knees behind Peckinpah as Gecko shoves Peckinpah from the front, bowling him over. Robbie takes a moment to get up and out of the measuring tape. David Ringman bangs the gong.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!

WINNER: Geckos with STDs via shenanigans at 1:13




We go backstage where Lord Edwin Kazoo Band is standing with the rest of the Candy Connection. Iron Tooth Maloosky looks intense! Uncle Treasure Island looks intense! The Algebra Brothers look intense!

Well, last time on FUN Wrestling, we showed the world what we're made of. That's walking around carrying baskets of candy. This week, we look to make a statement!

With that, Thomas the Tank Engineer walks up to them.

CHOO CHOO!

Lord Edwin Kazoo Band gasps! Iron Tooth Maloosky faints into the arms of Uncle Treasure Island! The Algebra Brothers wander off, probably looking for something way better to do!



We go back to the ring where we see the Fifteen Dollar Man, and beside him is Robert Main, dressed exactly like a middle school P.E. teacher with shorts that are far too tight and a t-shirt tucked into them, a pair of New Balances, and for some reason wearing a rainbow afro wig.

FUN Wrestling, we're here to say one thing and one thing only, I'm the Fifteen Dollar Man, this is my partner, Gemstone Gene, and I have an offer to anyone in the audience. I will pay you fifteen dollars if you can bounce a basketball ten times.

People attempt to volunteer themselves left and right, more the opportunity to get in the ring with the Fifteen Dollar Man and Gemstone Gene. From out of the crowd, however, we see Chris Page step forward. Robbie stands up from sitting with Doc as Colonel Peckinpah intervenes and David Ringman prepares his gong.

Oh my, it's Max Hazard! He's not only one of the hottest names in wrestling today, but he loves him some basketball gambling!


Fifteen Dollar Man and Gemstone Gene
vs
Max Hazard
Gambling on sports!


Max Hazard runs back up the entrance way from ringside! He wants his entrance music!



Max Hazard runs back out to the ring from the entrance way. Not to be outdone, Gemstone Gene slides out of the ring and runs past Max Hazard into the backstage area for HIS entrance music!



Gemstone Gene runs back and slides into the ring. Thunder Knuckles jaws at Robbie something about getting his Xbux for being the Fifteen Dollar Man again. Max Hazard really likes his entrance music, so he runs backstage AGAIN!



The crowd is completely eating up every second of this. David Ringman bangs the gong.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!

Everybody looks around, kind of confused. Robbie facepalms as Colonel Peckinpah gets up from his seat to find a basketball. He looks under the ring, then looks up, confused. Suddenly, out of nowhere...



Link Rexx in a baseball catchers mask, football pads, hockey gloves, and the exact same shorts as Gemstone Gene comes down to the ring holding a basketball!

THE SPORTS AUTHORITY IS HERE TONIGHT FOLKS! THE SPORTS EQUIPMENT KID!

The Sports Equipment Kid tosses the ball into the ring as Robbie calms TK down about the Xbux, telling him to focus on this as the Fifteen Dollar Man. Gemstone Gene hands the basketball to Max Hazard. Max Hazard looks at it then hands it to the Fifteen Dollar Man. The Fifteen Dollar Man passes to the Sports Equipment Kid. The Sports Equipment Kid dribbles the ball twice then passes to Peckinpah. Peckinpah slam dunks the ball into a hoop that appeared ringside somehow. Peckinpah then passes the ball to Gemstone Gene. Gemstone Gene throws the ball out into the crowd. Max Hazard does not bounce the basketball five times!

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!

WINNER: The Fifteen Dollar Man and Gemstone Gene for some reason at 2:12


**Special thanks to everybody I didn't bother to ask for this card.
***Engineer is too busy trying to figure out how to be creepy

[Image: DtUCPfZ.png]
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[-] The following 8 users Like Prof. Bobby Bourbon's post:
"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane (01-26-2020), Atara Raven (01-12-2020), Barney Green (01-14-2020), Corey Smith (01-13-2020), red-x (01-21-2020), Robert "The Omega" Main (01-16-2020), Theo Pryce (01-14-2020), Thunder Knuckles™ (01-12-2020)




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