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Saturday Night Solstice 12/28
Author Message
Atticus White Offline
White is the new Black
Management Lv. 2

XWF FanBase:
Some of everyone

(cheered; very rarely plays dirty but isn't lame either; many likable qualities)

Post: #1
12-28-2019 10:33 PM

[Image: sxanB6R.png]


[Image: NYK_012315_2467.jpg?1517256999]


- vs -
Jessalyn Hart
8 Minutes of Hannukah Deathmatch
8 minute time limit
No DQ, All weapons & Holds are legal.
Fire, barbwire, weapons and dreidels!

Brian Storm & Doktor Trust
- vs -
John Black & Tommy Wish
Naughty or Nice Tag Match
Standard Tag Match
The losers will get coal :(
While the winners will get a massive Xbux prize! :D

Jim Jimson
- vs -
Donovan Blackwater
Ugly Sweater Brawl
Both competitors wear hideous Christmas sweaters
Competitors must beat down their opponent and forcefully remove the sweater to win
Participants may talk about how ugly their sweaters are for bonus points

Geri Miller
- vs -
Griffin MacAlister
Green Christmas Match
These two like smoking pot, so let's see how exciting a match with two stoned people can be!

"Notorious" Ned Kaye
- vs -
Hanari Carnes
Feliz Navidad Partido
Presents and a barbwire Christmas tree are on the outside of the ring

[Image: rWOE8Gi.png]

- vs -
Sarah Lacklan
Miracle on 34th Street Fight
Match will be considered unsanctioned
If Lacklan wins, she will receive an Xtreme OR a TV title shot to be used at her leisure
If Fuzz wins he (and a partner of his choice) will be number one contenders for the Tag Titles

- vs -
Jessalyn Hart
8 Minutes of Hannukah Deathmatch
8 minute time limit
No DQ, All weapons & Holds are legal.
Fire, barbwire, weapons and dreidels!

Roman makes his way down to the ring with the biggest, goofiest smile you've ever seen.

The words NEVER...BE...SILENT!!! appear on the screen as the song starts. Lights go out Stobe lights at the top of the ramp illuminate the silhouette of Jessalyn. The lights come on to her facing the facing the ring. She runs down the ramp, slides into the ring. Climbs the turnbuckle with arms stretched out.

PC: “And it looks like we’re off to the races with what should be an exciting contest!”

HHL: “Eight minutes on the clock and someone is going to get a menorah up their ass!”

PC: “That’s right Heather! Eight minutes on the clock!”

HHL: “…and someone is going to get a menorah up their ass.”

PC: “We can only hope.”


The bell sounds as Jessalyn explodes across the ring as if shot out of a cannon! She leaps up, legs-first, and wraps them around the head of Roman before sending him scurrying across the ring with the impact of the hurricanrana! He scrambles to his feet only to feet those familiar legs wrap around his neck again and send him careening into the second turnbuckle! He slams hard into it before staggering backwards holding his nose in his hand.

Jessalyn tries for a third one as her legs find purchase around his neck!

But Roman grabs the legs and stiffens his legs to keep his balance this time!

He pulls her legs down and quickly turns her over onto her belly!


The liontamer is locked in and Jessalyn might already be in jeopardy!

HHL: “Hit him in the balls! HIT HIM IN THE BALLS!”

PC: “It is a definite disadvantage for a man fighting a woman. Despite… nearly every other advantage they have.”

But she begins digging in the side of her tights and she quickly pulls something out.



PC: “Rough week, HHL?”


The jolts shock the system of Roman who quickly releases the hold and staggers forward into the ropes where his arms rest over them.

Jessalyn rolls to her feet and leaps over the top rope, dragging Roman’s throat down across the top rope! He’s shot backwards as Hart lands on the outside. She reaches underneath the ring and pulls out a small bag with a Jewish star upon it!

She slides into the ring and begins reaching inside. She pulls out a…


HHL: “This should be interesting! I wonder if Roman even knows what that is.”

PC: “Regardless of whether he knows how to use it, Jessalyn is looking to do some damage with that dreidel!”

HHL: “OH! THAT’S a dreidel…”

She weighs it in her hand before turning towards Roman. Standing dropkick sends the metallic dreidel back right into her face! She staggers back into the ropes as Roman kips back up to his feet with a big stupid grin upon his face. Jessalyn rushes towards him!

But he ducks her clothesline and hooks her waist before lifting her up and dropping her with a belly-to-back body drop!


Roman hooks a leg!



TH-NO! Jessalyn kicks out!

PC: “It was close, but she keeps herself alive in this contest!”

Roman quickly rolls her up with a schoolboy as she gets up!



HHL: “Going to have to do more than that to keep Jessalyn down!”

They both get to their feet, but Roman tries for another dropkick that misses! Jessalyn grabs the dreidel and rushes towards Roman!


Roman dodges the blow once again before hitting a jawbreaker followed by yet another roll-up!




PC: “The referee is in the wrong position to see the feet on the ropes!”

HHL: “Damnit Wang! Open your eyes!”


Winner - Roman

[We return from commercial and Steve Sayors is in the ring]

Steve Sayors : Please welcome my guest at this time, “Box Office” Brian O’Haire.

The lights go down and “Love Changes Everything” by Climie Fisher plays as Brian O’Haire makes his way to the ring, there is no frills to the entrance as he walks down the aisle with a steely focus. He enters the ring and shakes hands with Steve Sayors.

Steve Sayors : Brian, over the past few weeks you’ve been targeted by in some of the most bizzare attacks that we have seen here in the XWF. Now, we have come to learn that the perpetrator is someone called Zeebo. He appears to be some sort of clown, and has promised to reveal why he has targeted you.

Brian O’Haire : Look Steve, I don’t know what the hell is going on, and granted I haven’t been around much due to some previously agreed contracts. (Incidentally, keep an eye out for my latest trailer coming soon) but this.... thing has been trying to pick a fight with me, and other XWF stars. And really, I’ve had enough of it. He is trying to ride off my coattails. He is recognising that I, the top man in Hollywood, has the potential to be the best in the XWF too. So what better way to make a name for yourself than to try. So, Zeebo. Get the hell out here. It’s time to stop this.

Disturbing circus music plays as the arena is plunged into darkness, then kicks into life in a haze of colour. A burst of confetti blasts at the top of the ramp, as Brian O’Haire preps himself in the ring to meet Zeebo. The music plays for a minute then stops. We hear a horn honk repeatedly then a demonic laugh. A further confetti cannon blasts in the ring which causes Steve Sayors to bail out of the ring in fright. The X-Tron flicks away from the scene of a circus to the face of a clown. The clown’s face is not too dissimilar to that of Pennywise, a scary, demonic looking clown.

Zeebo :
There once was a movie star called Brian,
Who’s brain Zeebo got-a-fryin,
He had no clue,
What to do,
When Zeebo starts the countdown to him Dyin’

[Zeebo clicks his fingers and a countdown clock flicks onto the screen. It seems to be counting down to this exact moment on the next edition of Savage]

Zeebo : Brian my chum, let me tell you this straight and up front. I decided that I should not come and see you this week, because simply. You are not ready for the truth. You are unprepared to deal with the torment I will bring you. You are unprepared to deal with the radical change that I will bring when you learn the TRUTH about your life, and dare I say it, your death. Simply put Brian, my friend. This is going to be the end of your days. It’s the end of Brian O’Haire, because you are absolutely nothing. You need me, and that’s why I’ve targeted you. You’ve stagnated. You’ve become stale before you were even ripe. You have become the equivalent of a box office flop. You are straight to DVD. You are Betamax. You are obsolete. Or at least, when I am done with you, you Brian, will be obsolete.

I am inviting you to fight me. Meet me face to face in the savage ring, on the next episode, where I can deal with you, and you can stare into the abyss and see your fears right in front of you. There is much that we need to deal with Brian, and much you will learn. All I need to know is will you please partake in this match with me? Would you please?

[Zeebo gives a sly smirk and chuckles as he beckons with his fingers towards Brian.]

[A confetti’s cannon plunges the arena into darkness. A few moments pass and the lights come back up and in the ring Brian O’Haire has a red nose on. He rips it off and throws it angrily into the crowd as the show cuts to commercial]

Brian Storm & Doktor Trust
- vs -
John Black & Tommy Wish
Naughty or Nice Tag Match
Standard Tag Match
The losers will get coal :(
While the winners will get a massive Xbux prize! :D

As the riff starts to play on the X-Tron, the camera pans around the arena, and it captures Tommy in the aisle way; and he taunts to the crowd as he walks down the stairs from them. He then hops over the barricades, and slides into the ring, and sits on the corner as his theme cuts off.

As "Tell ME what I'm After" blares over the X-Tron, as the drum kicks in, Black comes out in a jacket and shades while the smoke follows him down to the ring. Black then stands in the ramp, and fist bumps the fans, and gives his shades to one of the kids, and fist bumps them. Black then goes to the steel steps and enters the ring.

Doktor Trust enters like a shadow before entering the ring with a smirk upon his face.

Brian Storm comes in riding a clydesdale with a corncob pipe in his mouth, twirling a lasso high above his head. He rides the horse down the ramp and around the ring, back to the end of the ramp, jumps off, smacks the horse in the ass and the horse runs up the ramp, returning to its place backstage. Then Brian tosses his lasso in a corner and rolls into the ring under the bottom rope, gets up and waits for the fight to start.

PC: “It’s a Naughty or Nice tag team match with a lump of coal on the line!”
HHL: “What do you think the T.H.U.G.S. will do with a lump of coal?”

PC: “Oh I’m sure they’ll put it to good use over someone’s head.”


Brian Storm steps into the ring and begins patting his stomach as he intensely looks across the ring. Tommy Wish spits in his direction as he walks towards him. The two meet up in the center of the ring where Wish cracks him with a big right hand. Storm staggers back, but Wish lunges towards him with an uppercut!

Storm is lifted up momentarily as he staggers backwards into his own corner.


Doktor Trust steps into the ring and is instantly drilled with a big kick. Wish wraps up the wrist of Trust before climbing up onto the top rope. He begins walking as Trust loses his balance! He bumps into the rope knocking Wish precariously onto the top rope.

PC: “OOF! He’s turning a whole new shade of white after that fall.”

HHL: “He’s probably choking on his balls after that fall.”

Wish’s eyes roll into the back of his head as he falls off the rope clutching his groin. Trust sees Wish down and quickly covers!



PC: “I can’t believe he actually kicked out so quickly!”

HHL: “You men all tap out that quickly, Pippy.”

Trust goes to lift up Wish, but Wish nails a jawbreaker before lunging back towards his corner. He reaches out and…


John Black climbs into the ring and delivers two kicks to the midsection before wrapping up the head of Doktor Trust before snapping him back with a spike DDT! Black quickly begins drilling the large man with a series of boots to the midsection and arms of Trust! Black grabs him by the arm before turning him over and wrapping up the legs into a liontamer!


Trust is reaching out for the rope, but the knee of Black on the back of his head is preventing him from really progressing forward.


PC: “Black will regret not keeping his eye on the man from Tennessee!”

HHL: “Hopefully his jaw will be a reminder next time.”

The punch comes out of nowhere as Black slumps to the mat! Brian Storm leaps back out of the ring and extends a hand as both men begin the slow crawl. Both men are inching their ways towards their partners.

Tommy Wish and Brian Storm are desperate to get back into the ring!

Both men continue their crawl before leaping!



Wish and Storm dash towards the center of the ring where they collide with a series of punches back and forth! The crowd is on their feet as the pace has just picked up exponentially!

Overhead punch from Storm rocks Wish for a moment and long enough for Brian to rally up his fury!





Wish is down on his knees clutching his jaw and back as Brian Storm is looking for the audience approval. They give it as he begins gyrating his hips seemingly reading the final bit. And… he lets one rip!


BUT John Black pushed Tommy Wish out of the way just in the nick of time taking the full blast of the horrendous gas straight to his face!

John Black staggers backwards before falling through the ropes to the outside of the ring!

Doktor Trust sees the imbalance in the ring and rushes in, but Tommy Wish dropkicks Storm right into his partner! The two collide heads as Trust slumps out of the ring.

Tommy Wish rolls up Brian Storm!




Winners - The T.H.U.G.S.

PC: “The T.H.U.G.S. have stolen a victory, but at least they’re giving their opponents something in return!”

HHL: “A lump of coal to soak their tears tonight.”

Jim Jimson
- vs -
Donovan Blackwater
Ugly Sweater Brawl
Both competitors wear hideous Christmas sweaters
Competitors must beat down their opponent and forcefully remove the sweater to win
Participants may talk about how ugly their sweaters are for bonus points

Jim rolls out from under the apron wearing a particularly ugly sweater looking like he just woke up from a nap. He steals a water bottle from a fan and pours it in his eyes, hands the now empty bottle to a fan and slides into the ring.

All three brothers emerge with Donovan Blackwater in the lead. Pausing briefly, the brothers look around at the exuberant crowd, with immense entertainment. Sharing an amused glance to one another as the fans scream. From there they walk in unison to the ring, occasionally separating to approach a random fan that's losing their mind. Clearly, enjoying the effect they have on the crowd, the Brothers Blackwater continue onward. Once they reach the ring, two of the brothers hold up the bottom rope as Donovan slides into the ring. Donovan then takes his place in the squared circle and awaits his opponent, while basking in the cheers from the audience.

PC: “It’s a battle between… ugly sweaters?”

HHL: “Honestly, Pip, I’m just glad Jim is wearing one to cover up his grotesque paleness that we’re normally subjected to.”

PC: “Too true, Heather.”


The bell sounds and Jim instantly leaps onto Donovan and begins yanking up at his sweater. Donovan quickly stops that with a stiff headbutt followed by a leg sweep taking Jim Jimson to the mat. He rolls through as Jim brings himself to his knees.


The kick nearly decapitates Jim with the intensity!

Donovan quickly grabs Jim and lifts him up, but Jim kicks him square in the Blackwater pearls! Donovan quickly folds over as Jim takes a step back before lighting up his chin with a quick superkick!

Blackwater falls back onto his back as Jim sees his first opportunity for an easy win.

Jim reaches into his pocket and pulls out…


HHL: “….really?”

PC: “Unfortunately.”

Jim gets to his feet before pulling moving the pinecone towards the mouth of Donovan Blackwater…


A huge shockwave sends Jim flying across the ring and slams him into the corner turnbuckle. A huge blast emanating from Donovan Blackwater has spread a grin across his face as he rises to his feet.

HHL: “Can he really do that, Pip?!”

PC: “Of course he can! Everything’s legal in an Ugly Sweater Brawl!”

He spots the pinecone on the ground beside him before raising a foot and STOMPING down on the pinecone sending cone pieces in every direction.

Jim Jimson looks annoyed and a bit surprised as Donovan rushes towards him with a big dropkick! Jimson just falls to the bottom of the turnbuckle to avoid the move before rolling up Donovan into a crossface after he crashes with the miss.

Jimson has the hold expertly applied as he’s leaning back into the hold putting maximum pressure on the face and nose of Blackwater! Donovan reaches out, but the ropes are too far away.

HHL: “Unfortunately for him, those ropes are going to be no salvation.”

PC: “That’s correct. Only stripping the opponent will secure the victory.”

HHL: “…….”

PC: “….I know what I said.”

Jimson drops an elbow across the back of Blackwater’s head before grabbing the base of his sweater and beginning to give a tug. It comes about halfway before Donovan regains consciousness long enough to kick Jimson right in the uprights!

Jim falls to a knee as justice has been paid from earlier in the match.

Donovan rolls to his feet before pulling Jim Jimson in close before throwing him over his shoulder with an alley-oop facebuster!


Donovan quickly rushes over and begins pulling on the sweater, but it seems like it’s sticking to Jim? He keeps pulling, but the sweater is barely moving!

PC: “It seems the sheer amount of sweat coming off of Jim Jimson is making removing that sweater increasingly difficult as this match progresses!”

HHL: “I think I’m going to be sick.”

Donovan manages to get a better handhold of it as it begins moving up, but Jim begins to stir.


Jim Jimson just stabbed the eye of Donovan with a piece of pinecone! He reaches into his pocket and…. RETRIEVES ANOTHER PINECONE!?

HHL: “Does this guy just live in a tree normally?”

PC: “Yet another pinecone has entered into the battlefield!”

Jim grabs the bottom jaw of Donovan Blackwater before jamming his pinecone into his mouth!


Donovan seems confused by the presence of a pinecone in his mouth, but Jim Jimson isn’t finished! He grabs the head of Donovan down into a jawbreaker!


HHL: “Okay, now I’m definitely going to be sick!”

PC: “Donovan Blackwater was just FORCED to chew on a pinecone! Blood is coming from his mouth!”

Blood pours from the mouth of Donovan Blackwater who looks out on his feet. Jim Jimson smiles as he stretches his arms out.

Another force field blast sends Jim careening backwards as Donovan looks PISSED as he spits out more blood and pinecone shards.

Donovan raises a hand as Jim is yanked forwards towards him where Donovan kicks him in the gut and locks his head up.


The Educator just smashes Jim’s head into the bloody remains of the pinecone shards as Donovan rolls him over and quickly snatches the sweater off with seemingly no issue!

Winner - Donovan Blackwater

PC: “The unique powers of Donovan continue to aid him as he secures a victory here tonight over Jim Jimson.”

HHL: “But at what cost? His poor teeth…”

Geri Miller
- vs -
Griffin MacAlister
Green Christmas Match
These two like smoking pot, so let's see how exciting a match with two stoned people can be!

Griffin emerges from the entrance; eyes set straight ahead, he marches to the ring without much attention or emotion shown towards the crowd. Climbing the steel steps, he then takes his place within the ring and awaits his opponent's arrival.

The Goddess of Ganja comes out looking a little shaky before rolling into the ring to meet the eyes of Griffin McAlister.

PC: “It’s going to be a Green Christmas tonight in this Green Christmas match!”

HHL: “You’ve been waiting all night to use that line, haven’t you?”

PC: “It’s high time to get this under way!”

HHL: “I hate this.”


The bell sounds as both competitors are a little out on their feet. They move towards the center of the ring where they both throw blows right and left! Despite the punches finding purchase, they seem to not have the normal impact. Griffin grabs Geri and locks in a side headlock. He takes her down to the mat. He begins raining down blows!

Geri reaches up and rakes his eyes! Griffin releases his hold and raises back up to his feet where he’s clutching his exceedingly reddening eyes in pain.

Geri Miller kips up to her feet before dotting him on the chin with a super kick! Griffin staggers back into the corner where Geri rushes towards him, leaps on him, and falls backwards with a monkey flip sending Griffin sprawling across the ring!

HHL: “I would imagine that must be disorienting.”

Geri Miller grabs the leg of Griffin beneath them before wrapping her fingers around his jaw in a Rings of Saturn!


Griffin is being stretched out as he’s crying out in pain at the hold. He’s reaching out, but the ropes are more than a few inches away!

PC: “Is he going to tap out this early into the contest?!”

HHL: “He’s being crossfaded!”

Griffin manages to push himself off the mat and roll towards the ropes where he reaches out and grabs the bottom rope! The referee slides into position and begins giving a count.

As he reaches four, Geri Miller releases the hold as Griffin clutches his jaw. The Goddess of Ganja grabs Griffin’s legs, but he manages to get a swift kick to the face to get some separation. He kips up to his feet, but he’s staggered momentarily either by the sheer amount of weed consumption or The Leaf.

Or both.

He hits the ropes before rushing towards her with a clothesline that knocks her to the mat for a moment. She bounces up before taking a second clothesline! She pops back up as Griffin locks onto her head and drives her into that mat with a big DDT!

She hits the mats as boots begin being rained down upon her. She tries to get up only to find her face being planted firmly into the mat with a curb stomp!


Griffin goes for the cover!



TH-NO! Geri Miller kicks out with energy!

PC: “That was a close one as her head must be reeling!”

HHL: “She’s not getting back up very easily.”

She’s not wrong as Geri is slow to get back to her feet. MacAlister aids her before sending her into the ropes. She stops at the ropes and clutches on. The Mechanic rushes towards her only to receive a huge slap!

He’s rocked as he’s out on his feet from the sheer impact. She kicks him in the midsection before hitting the Pele kick!

Both hit the mat as they are very slow to respond. Geri manages to get up and climb the top turnbuckle. She looks down at the ring before gulping.

630 Splash!


She hooks a leg!




Winner - Geri Miller

"Notorious" Ned Kaye
- vs -
Hanari Carnes
Feliz Navidad Partido
Presents and a barbwire Christmas tree are on the outside of the ring

The entire stadium goes black as the song begins. Slowly, the X-Tron begins to show scarce, glowing embers, the light of each one illuminating smoke growing at the entrance of the ramp. As the song continues, more embers are seen until a large fire is displayed on the screen. The ramp then glows Ned's famous blue, revealing a silhouette in the smoke. Slowly stepping from the fog is none other then Notorious Ned Kaye. He stops for a moment, calming himself in front of the clamoring crowd. He lifts an arm, eyeing the stands to watch the many audience members who follow suit. With a single smile, he drops his arm and rushes towards the ring, slipping in from under the bottom rope, picking himself up immediately.

Danza Kuduro hits and Hanari spins and dances his way out to the ramp in traditional latin Bachata style. He is carrying the flag of the Dominican Republic on a flag pole over his shoulder. He swings his hips and points at the ladies in the front row, winking and making the gun symbol with his thumb and index finger of his free hand. He spins again and walks his way down to the ring with a cocky head swing and a million dollar smile. Climbing the ring steps he gets into the ring, getting on the top rope and waving the flag a few times before jumping down and preparing for the match.

PC: “Feliz Navidad, Heather!”

HHL: “It’s time to get Xtreme! Look at that Barbed-Wire Christmas Tree!”

PC: “I have to imagine that that will come into play in this No DQ match!”


The bell sounds as these two begin circling around the ring. Notorious Ned Kaye lunges forward grabbing for a leg which he lifts up, but Carnes goes for the enzuigiri while his leg is held. Ned Kaye ducks the kick allowing Hanari to slam down into the mat. Ned Kaye hits the ropes before leaping up for a double knee strike that Hanari rolls out of the way for. Carnes goes for the chop block, but Ned Kaye manages to roll out of the way.

They both come to a standstill with their fists prepped for another display.

The crowd cheers them on for their display of athleticism!

PC: “They may love blood and violence, but our crowds can always appreciate great action.”

Hanari hits the ropes as Ned hits the mat to let him go over. Carnes puts on the brakes though and drops a knee right to the back of Kaye’s head! The crowd boos as Carnes puts a knee into the back of Ned before wrenching back on the chin of him.
Ned Kaye reaches out for the ropes for a moment before seeing the referee tell him that that won’t help him in this No DQ match. Ned Kaye reaches up and puts a thumb right into the eye of Carnes!

HHL: “He needs that to see, Ned!”

PC: “Ned is showing that he’ll do anything to win on this holiday extravaganza!”

The Dominican releases the hold as he stands up to massage his eye. He holds onto the rope as he clears his eye. Ned Kaye rolls to his feet before charging right after him with a huge superkick that manages to have enough sting to send Hanari right over the top rope and to the floor outside of the ring. Ned Kaye steps out onto the apron before sizing up Carnes. Hanari rises to his feet just as Ned Kaye leaps off towards him with a dropkick!

Carnes is blasted backwards from the impact right into the pile of gifts at ringside to the point where he disappears from view!

HHL: “Did he just get eaten by the gifts?!”

PC: “It appears so! How deep does that stack of gifts go?!”

A moment passes as both men collect themselves. Ned Kaye grabs a red and white striped gift and gives it a shake before ripping the top off of it.

He holds up a pair of brass knuckles with a wicked grin. He reaches into the pile and grabs the arm of Hanari before raising his brass fist into the air.

HHL: “This is going to hurt!”


From within the gift void, a plume of fire extinguisher spray catches Ned Kaye right in the eyes! He staggers backwards as Hanari holds up the fire extinguisher before driving the heavy metallic object right into the midsection of Ned. He lifts up Ned onto his shoulders before leaping backwards into the pile of gifts with a Samoan drop destroying a few except for one that sustains the weight of both Hanari and Ned Kaye!

PC: “What the hell is in that package?!”

HHL: “I don’t know, but the box barely looks hurt!”

Ned rolls away clutching his back in severe pain as Hanari looks curiously at the box that sustained itself. He rips off the top of the box to reveal a cinder block within! He lays the cinder block on the ground before pulling Ned Kaye over to it. He lifts him up onto his shoulders once again, but Kaye fights out before driving a leaping knee into the temple of Carnes followed by a very quick leg sweep!

Sending Hanari’s HEAD right onto the cinder block!

PC: “Yay concussions!”

HHL: “He’ll be feeling that one for awhile. Damn that looks like it hurt.”

Carnes begins yelling out in pain as he rolls away clutching his head which is showing signs of red beneath the dark hair. Ned Kaye takes a moment to feel his back before grabbing Carnes by the head and dragging him towards the large Christmas tree set up at ringside. Ned rolls into the ring and puts his hands on the ropes as he’s waiting for Carnes to get to his feet. Hanari Carnes slowly rises to his feet as Ned leaps over the top rope before spinning down and catching Carnes by the head!

But Carnes stops his momentum! He lifts up Ned in that position and SLAMS him down on the apron! But Carnes doesn’t stop there as he lifts him back up in the powerbomb position and…


HHL: “Looks like you were right about the tree coming into play, but I didn’t think it’d be in such a violent way!”

PC: “Ned Kaye may never be the same again after this war!”

Ned is bleeding profusely as he lands square on the tree knocking it over with his weight pressing down on top of it. Carnes quickly grabs Ned and pulls him away from the carnage before covering him!



PC: “This has to be it!”

HHL: “No one would even blame him if he stayed down.”


PC: “And that’s a big win for-”


HHL: “He can barely move, and he’s still trying to come back?!”

PC: “This may not be the smartest move for him…”

Notorious Ned Kaye managed to get a shoulder up right at the three count! Hanari can’t believe it! He walks over to the gifts and pops the top on another before reaching in and pulling out a barb-wired steel chair! He turns to Ned Kaye with determination on his face.

He walks over to Ned Kaye with the chair raised high as Ned begins to rise up.

VAN DAMINATOR! The chair crashes right into the face of Hanari Carnes as he staggers backwards blinded by the burst of blood from his own forehead. He pulls the chair off his face as the blood begins to flow freely from his head!

HHL: “This is fucking sick!”

PC: “There must be buckets of blood around the ringside area now!”

Ned Kaye slowly climbs up onto the apron as Hanari staggers around with blood trying to fill his eyes.

He leaps off before hooking the head of Carnes and sending him down into a hurricanrana pinfall!


The referee slides into position, careful to avoid the carnage.



PC: “This HAS to be it!”


Winner - Notorious Ned Kaye

"X-Men Theme" by Powerglove hits over the PA system as a chorus mixed with both cheers and boos fill the arena. As a bunch of mini spotlights in the shape of 'D's shine, Big D walks onto the ramp with a blank expression on his face. He walks down the aisle, ignoring the fans' outstretched arms, his eyes focused on the ring.

HHL: "Looks like someone's got something to say!"

PC: "Gee, I can't wait."

Big D uses the second rope to pull himself up onto the apron, before climbing in the ring. He walks over and grabs a mic, as the fans continue to give him a mixed reaction.

HHL: "Surprisingly there's some CHEERS in all that noise!"

PC: "You gotta wonder if his recent association with Ned Kaye, as well as the likes of Robert Main and Chris Page, have garnered him some fanfare?"

HHL: "They must've forgotten about jim grabbing me by the hair a few months back."

PC: "What about ME? He threw me across the table like I was a beer pong ball!"

Big D paces around the ring a bit, not speaking despite the crowd noise dying down. After a few tense moments of this, D walks over to the corner and puts his back to it, before climbing up and sitting on the top turnbuckle.

BIG D: "I don't regret no showing Warfare........"

The fans boo, causing Big D to close his eyes and look at the mat.

BIG D: "I wish you'd all stop treating me like the bad guy in this situation. I'M not the one who you should direct your anger at. Blame Smokin' Bob for not knowing how to book a God damn Warfare!!!! Blame Vinnie Lane, and Theo Pryce, for making a mockery of the business!!!!!! When you decide who Main Events shows, and who opens them, by a roll of the dice, you're failing EVERYONE!......... You're failing your company, you're failing your employees, and, most importantly, you're failing the fans!!!!"

HHL: "Since when has he ever cared about them?"

PC: "Maybe teaming with Ned's given him a change of heart."

BIG D: "I didn't WANT to no show Warfare, but I didn't feel like I had any other choice. When someone like Seth Feder can just show up out of the blue and receive a Universal Title shot, YOU'RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG!!!!! XWF has hard working, dedicated people right under their nose and they either don't realise it, or don't give a damn!!!! I may not have been the perfect choice to be in that match, but I certainly was a BETTER ONE! When Sarah Lacklan, the biggest bitch in the entire company, is endorsing you for an Anarchy Title shot, you know it means something! When Lux, or whatever the fuck we're supposed to call her now, says to you 'you're not the same man I faced months back' after you've won gold, IT MEANS SOMETHING!!!! Having the former Anarchy Champion AND current Universal Champion shower you with praise shouldn't be taken lightly and, for some reason, it is!!!!"

Big D hops down off the turnbuckle and makes his way to the center of the ring.

BIG D: "But I can't help management, no matter how often I shout the truth in their direction, it goes unheard. So now I'm left with a choice: make due with what I've got or find a different company that will give me a fair shot to make it........"

HHL: "Does he REALLY think threatening to quit will get him anything he wants?"

PC: "Better than him threatening US!"

BIG D:"If I quit, everyone will call me a coward. I'll be looked at as a stain on the XWF and my name would fade into obscurity as just some guy who held a couple belts. As much as leaving would better ensure become a World Champion, it's just NOT the option I can take......."

The fans who want Big D to stay cheer for his declaration, while the ones who'd love to see him go boo.

BIG D: "That being said, I'm here to declare myself the Number 1 Contender for the TV Title!!!!!"

HHL: "You have GOT to be kidding me! He wants a shot after bailing on his last Title match?!"

PC: "I don't care what Noah's doctor said, it takes some massive balls to come out here and make a statement like THAT!"

BIG D: "I know you all think I'm crazy. How could I possibly ask for a TV Title shot when I passed up an opportunity already? Well, it wasn't the opportunity I passed up........ It was wasting my Christmas on a Championship nobody respected me for holding in the FIRST place!"

Big D pauses for a moment to let the mixed crowd five their opinion, before continuing.

BIG D: "I never had my rematch, well I'm out here NOW, not asking for, but DEMANDING it! It's the LEAST Atticus Black can do after all that his fellow General Manager's have done to me! If you have ANY respect left for talent, get your ass out here and make Big D the Number One Contender to the TV Title! It's where you all think I belong, RIGHT?!?! So if you're not gonna give me the Universal Title match I deserve, then you better damn well give me SOMETHING for being a company guy and staying in spite of the constant bullshit y'all put me through!!!!"

PC: "Is Big D a millennial? Because he sure sounds like one."

HHL: "I think he has no sense of reality, Pip."

Suddenly "Angel's Fall" by Breaking Benjamin hits the P.A and there is a mixed reaction from the fans as out walks Scully onto the stage area, with microphone in hand.

HHL: "Scully is of course the rightful number one contender after winning the fatal four way at Lethal Lottery."

PC: "Well he's meant to be...."

Skull looks around at the crowd and not even acknowledging Big D, who is stood in the ring. Skull raises the mic to his lips...


Skull walks down the ramp way and finally locks eyes on Big D as Scully begins to talk..

SCULLY: "You gotta be kidding me right?!

Is this a joke? Are you fucking drunk?!

Yeah I'm talking to you..... Big Dickhead!"

Some laughter can be heard in the audience. Scully walks up the steps and into the ring.

SCULLY: "Wait a minute.. Don't say nothing! I don't know if you've noticed, Big Dickhead... But I'm the real number one contender for the XWF TV Championship...

Not YOU! Not you mister No Show. You see, Scully has been in the Xtreme Wrestling Federation for five years. I've NEVER NO Showed for a match.

Not like you, you pathetic excuse of a man. Look at you, out here crying on national television... Wah Wah Wah..."

Scully drops his lower lip and pretends to cry to the amusement of the fans.

SCULLY: "I never cried for a rematch for the XWF Universal Championship. Shall I cry now? All these years later?! I never got a rematch for the XWF Xtreme Championship either. Hell, I wasn't even pinned in a match. Did I cry? Did I?!

You need to understand something pal, I'm the number one contender and I'm going to smash one member of the paedo Cunts face in... Noah Jackson. I'm going to dethrone him, not you!

I earnt my shot so I suggest you go back to the locker room and think about that!"

Scully smirks as he lowers the microphone.

PC: "Strong words from Scully."

HHL: "Big D doesn't seem to impressed here..."

BIG D: "Oh, no, you never no showed a match........ PHYSICALLY, but you certainly no showed your Universal Title shot MENTALLY! Unknown Soldier made you look like a complete bitch and we all know Noah will do the same, so there's no need to even bother!"

SCULLY: "You never watched my match with Soldier really did you? Cuz if you did, you would've seen I had him down for the count. Pinned for the...




The reason I wasn't victorious? Well it was that unprofessional referees fault, he was sleeping on the job! He was too busy napping. You never seen that huh? You never seen him play possum? I suggest you watch it again before you run your mouth!

I take it you was too busy getting bummed in the back by someone with an actual Big Dick?

By the way, I NEVER seen your whining little bitch ass, challenge Soldier. Just saying!"

Big D raises his microphone to respond but is interrupted as the X-Tron lights up.


Sick Carnt hits as a mix of cheers and boos and Noah, the Television Title wrapped around his waist, he stands at the top of the ramp chewing on gum, a mic in his hand he waits patiently until his music fades out. Noah looks between the potential challengers and raises the microphone.

NOAH: "You're both shit cunts."

The crowd pop in a mix of applause and laughter. Noah paces along the top of the ramp.

PC: "HA! Classic."

NOAH: "That fact that you two are squabbling to see who can get their shit pushed in the most by yours truly may be entertaining to laugh at but it's fucking underserved and retarded for sure. D, you balless sack of fecal matter, you don't deserve a rematch in fact I'm fairly certain after you lose you don't get a guaranteed rematch. If I cashed in, maybe, but I didn't. I kicked your ass from around about here." Noah points in a random direction on the ramp. "To about over there." Noah points to the nosebleeds with a twirling finger. "I fucking won fair and square, cunt and it's hilarious if you think that's gonna change a second time round."

"Scully you actually managed to get your shit together for a micro-second and win a chance to lose to me so I accept that I'm gonna have a match with you at some point but the sheer fact that you're getting cucked by Big D here and your only claim to fame this year is getting pinned by Soldier really seems like you'll be a shit challenge. I want to be the first Television Champion who doesn't drop the belt from being a pissbaby or a shit cunt or someone who couldn't keep up with doing a Savage every fortnight. I don't want to a paper champion who just keeps getting fed jobbers and you two jizz rags are certainly filling the enhancement talent role pretty fucking well."

"So, if we can all make claims by standing out here and just declaring them, then AS CHAMPION, I declare neither of you six-piece McFuckwit nobodies are worthy of a shot at my title. You both suck, the only thing you should be fighting over is a ticket stub in the car park so you can get into the arena in the first place. Sickest Cunt out!"

Noah turns to walk away but abruptly stops as Vivaldi's Il Gardellino in D and Atticus Black steps out onto the ramp. Noah stands shocked and Atticus plucks the mic from his grasp with a gentle smile.

ATTICUS BLACK: "Well, it seems to me we have something of a standoff with only one solution. Big D, you want a rematch for the Television Title, Scully you are the number one contender and deserve a one on one with the champion and Noah, although it pains me deeply, you are the Television Champion and therefore represent Savage. How you act and portray yourself reflects onto MY show and turning down two competitors who have earned their right to face you is not how I want MY champion presented."

The crowd cheer as Noah sulks a little.

ATTICUS BLACK: "So, therefore, next Savage, Noah you are going to face BOTH of these men in a Championship Scramble!"

The crowd pop, Noah rolls his eyes and goes to storm to the back but Atticus places a palm on his shoulder to halt him. Scully hangs his arms over the rope looking at the ramp, Big D keeps his arms folded, a small smirk on his face.

ATTICUS BLACK: "And the winner will defend at his title against the number one contender, whether that be Scully, Big D or even yourself at Cu- ... A future show."

Noah snarls and grabs Black's wrist raising the microphone to his mouth.

NOAH: "You're a real fucking cunt, you know that?"

Atticus smiles with a chuckle as Big D and Scully look back to one another with a grin on their faces, the show slowly fades to commercial.

[Image: rWOE8Gi.png]

- vs -
Sarah Lacklan
Miracle on 34th Street Fight
Match will be considered unsanctioned
If Lacklan wins, she will receive an Xtreme OR a TV title shot to be used at her leisure
If Fuzz wins he (and a partner of his choice) will be number one contenders for the Tag Titles

Tig O'Bitties stands in the centre of the ring.

TIG: "The following match will be considered unsanctioned and is a STREET FIGHT!"

The crowd pop.

With a huge roar from the crowd Fuzz strolls down the ramp with a smug grin pointing fingers at random fans and saying "no YOU'RE great!".

TIG: "Introducing first, hailing from Chicago, Illinois, standing at 6 foot 2 inches, weighing in at 234 pounds. He is the Xtreme Champion, winner of Lethal Lottery V and Hall of Legends inductee. The Afterthought, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!"

Fuzz rolls into the ring and raises his hands with his name before going to his corner.

HHL: "You gotta think the Xtreme Champ has an advantage in this match type."

PC: "You would think but I'd never count Lacklan out."

The lights go out in the arena.


A red spotlight shines down on the entrance ramp as a metal version of the Moonlight Sonata plays. Sarah calmly walks out onto the ramp and stops, taking the time to look at the crowd. As the guitars play, she slowly walks down the ramp, careful to avoid the touch of any fans, with an arrogant sneer on her face. As she approaches the ring steps, she carefully climbs them before entering the ring.

TIG: "And his opponent, hailing from Maine, standing at 5 foot 2 inches and weighing in at 140 pounds! She is half of the Tag Team Champions, The Queen of the XWF. The Blood Princess, SARAH LLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACKKKKKKKLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA​AAAANNN!!!"

PC: "Sarah has been an unstoppable force in the XWF and leaving Anarchy to be more on Savage must be a scary thought for some of the roster."

HHL: "That may be the only smart thing you say tonight."

PC: "What can I say, Sar brings out the best in me."

HHL: "Jeez, do I need to get a spray bottle?"

The two standoff in their respective corners. Head referee Chaz Bobo stand in between them and calls for the bell.


Fuzz waists no time removing his title for around his waist and sprinting forward looking to knock Sar out with an Xtreme shot but Lacklan ducks low and twirls back with a high kick, Fuzz manages to get his championship between his head and Lacklan's foot and shoves away the brunt of the attack. Fuzz is knocked against the ropes and loses his title to the outside; Lacklan spins a backfist in Fuzz's direction but the attack is dodged and The Afterthought goes to Sarah's back and throws her back in a German Suplex but Lacklan manages to turn mid-air and find her footing with a little trouble. Fuzz rolls to his belly avoiding a stomp and leaps up with a European Uppercut which barely grazes Lacklan and Fuzz takes advantage of her stumble with a short clothesline but Sarah telegraphs the attack and ducks under Fuzz's arm before grabbing his forearm with a twist and throwing him over her shoulder and locking in a tight armbar. Fuzz sits on the mat for only a moment before rolling back and untwisting his arm while hopping on his feet; the two share a quick look and both reel their heads back before knocking one another back with a headbutt! The crowd roar as Fuzz falls into the corner and Lacklan stumbles back onto a knee holding her forehead.

HHL: "Hot damn! These two are pretty evenly matched!"

The crowd revive the two fallen competitors as they slowly wobble to their feet and square off; Lacklan quickly throws an elbow into Fuzz's temple and sends him against the ropes, Fuzz leans against the top rope as Lacklan rushes forward in a rage only to be sent hurling over The Xtreme Champion's shoulders. Lacklan manages to land onto the apron and hops up looking for a high kick to Fuzz but he manages to grabs The Queen's ankle and utilizes his height and strength to dangle Lacklan upside down before delivering a brutal punt kick into Sarah's face!

PC: "Holy fuck!"

The crowd go manic as Fuzz lands the strike and Lacklan falls to the outside in a heap. Fuzz looks down and shakes his head to stop the ringing in his ear from Sarah's kick. Fuzz looks down at Sar struggling to stand and then back, the crowd's hype grows as they follow Fuzz running to the opposite ropes and sprinting back before leaping in a plancha towards Sarah!



Fuzz is nailed by the desperate attack from Lacklan and the pair fall to the outside; Sarah still seems out of it but manages to get a loose cover on the Xtreme Champ. Chaz Bono does a cartwheel before counting the pin because he's that type of guy.






Fuzz barely gets a shoulder up! Lacklan kneels up with a sneer and uses the apron to get herself up; she gives a stomp to Fuzz's gut to set him up before walking to the barricade and taking aim before sprinting forth.


Lacklan's knee is about to connect with Fuzz's skull.


Fuzz rolls back as he grabs Lacklan's leg and turns Lacklan into a single-leg Boston Crab! Lacklan reels in the hold as Fuzz pulls her apart, tearing to remove her leg brace with his spare hand.

Lacklan's eyes go wide as she tries to fight the agony. The crowd squirm as Fuzz removes a leg brace and begins to throw sharp knuckles into her calf. Lacklan's hand hovers over the floor before she curls it into a fist and punches down; she claws to the apron and digs underneath the ring; Fuzz reels back keeping the hold tight as the ref checks on Sar.

Lacklan lets out a scream in agony as her face falls to the mats outside. Her hand comes out quickly from under the ring and she bites down to not let out another cry as she quickly spins along with a kendo stick and clips the back of Fuzz's head causing him to fall forward, releasing the submission. Lacklan rolls on the ground clutching her leg as Fuzz holds the back of his forcing himself to stand as he leans against the steel steps, he pushes the top set away before Fuzz makes his way to Lacklan who wildly swings the kendo stick but Fuzz manages to catch the weapon and tosses it aside; Fuzz grabs Sarah's wounded leg in a tight grip which causes her to howl as he drags her closer to the steel steps. Fuzz plants her leg on the bottom set of steps and shoves his boot against her stomach, pinning her to the ground and then slams the top steel steps on top of her shin!

Lacklan flails wildly away from Fuzz as she goes back to holding her leg close to her body. Reaches under the apron and searches hard before grinning as he retrieves a sledgehammer!

HHL: "C'mon! I think this has gone far enough."

PC: "Unsanctioned my dude."

Fuzz heaves the hammer into his hands and walks to Lacklan once more, he raises the sledge looking for the ending shot but Lacklan gives a quick sweep with her good leg and Fuzz crashes his back against the ground! The crowd pop as Lacklan mounts Fuzz and begins unleashing forearm strikes with a hellish amount of fury behind each blow. The shock keeps Fuzz grounded as his nose bloodies, Fuzz gives off a desperate right hook and knocks Lacklan off; Fuzz quickly gets to his feet and lifts Lacklan to her feet.

HHL: "Smart move, Lacklan could be devastating on the ground game but on her feet she stands less of a chance."

Fuzz grapples Sarah but The Queen of the XWF quicky wraps her arms around Fuzz in a bear hug and unloads headbutt after headbutt into Fuzz's mush.

PC: "... You wanna take that back, Heather?"

Lacklan makes some room to move before dropping Fuzz with a snapmare and stumbles back. She quickly grabs the sledgehammer from the ground and rushes Fuzz swinging the hammer into his spine! Fuzz flails in agony holding his back; Lacklan uses the hammer as a crutch to relive some stress.

HHL: "Damn, I don't think either of these are going to leave on their own two feet after all this."

Fuzz crawls to his feet on the ramp as Lacklan's gears turns. She struggles a little but manages to get a hand on the mats outside and begins to lift one up, the crowd roar as she pushes away the hammer and hobbles on one leg to expose the concrete. Fuzz struggles to get to his feet, a hand on the barricade as Sarah turns and the two crippled fighters come close to one another; Fuzz goes for a strike but Lacklan weaves and pushes her face forward!



Lacklan's eyes bulge as she gags on the mist in her mouth. With a quick kick Fuzz goes for...








Winner via pinfall - Fuzz!

Lacklan seems to raise an arm just after the three as blood from her forehead seeps into her eyes. Fuzz is carried off Sarah and his hand is raised by the referee.

Medics go to aid Sarah who seems like a ghost unblinking as they guide her onto a stretcher; Noah Jackson runs down the ramp to help his 'father' out of the arena. As Fuzz's theme plays us out, he takes one last look to the crowd and raises a singular hand as Saturday Night Savage fades to black.

Thank you to those who wrote matches and sent in segments

Noah Jackson
Stormy Daniels
Theo Pryce for doing the bulk of the work this show

And everyone that RPed this week.

[Image: V3i33MC.png]
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[-] The following 7 users Like Atticus White's post:
BigD (12-28-2019), Jim "the Jim" Jimson (12-28-2019), Notorious Ned Kaye (12-28-2019), Peter Fn Gilmour (12-29-2019), Shawn Warstein (12-28-2019), The Brothers Blackwater (12-30-2019), Theo Pryce (12-29-2019)
Shawn Warstein Offline
Blood In Blood Out
TITLE - Universal Champion

XWF FanBase:
Very random

(heel alignment but liked by many; has earned respect despite breaking the rules often)

Post: #2
12-28-2019 11:03 PM

“Now that’s how you fucking end the year.”

“Let’s do a quick recap shall we?”

“Current X-Treme Champion. Check. Current Briefcase Holder. Check. Lethal Lottery winner. Check. New Number one contenders for the tag team titles. Check. Engy constantly trying to slide in my DM’s. Check-a-rookie.Noah still TV champion. Check. Noah having to face two shit stains for his title and have one of the easiest defenses of all time. Check.”

“Seems like the Cunts are riding high heading into the New Year.”

“Now all I’ve got to do it convince all the GM’s to actually say the name of the next PPV.”

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Noah Jackson (12-29-2019)
CCP Offline
Champions get their name in red!
TITLE - Tag Champion

XWF FanBase:
Very random

(heel alignment but liked by many; has earned respect despite breaking the rules often)

Post: #3
12-29-2019 04:23 AM

Fantastic show.

Superstar of the Year- FuZz

That’s all.

[Image: ChrisPage1.png]

[Image: fMJwa5h.png]

With Robert "The Omega" Main

- 2019 Heel of the Year
- 2019 Locker Room Leader of the Year (suck it Raven)
- 2019 Feud of the Year w. Robert Main (you’re welcome)
- Former XWF World Heavyweight Champion
- The most hated man in XWF History
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Noah Jackson (12-29-2019)
Roman Offline
Official Official In The XWF

XWF FanBase:
Green as Grass

(sloppy in the ring; botches moves regularly; shows up when fans are hoping for anyone else)

Post: #4
12-29-2019 07:57 AM

I won!

[Image: Banner1.jpg]
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Jessalyn Hart Offline
Active in XWF

XWF FanBase:

(gets varying reactions in the arenas, but will be worshiped like a god and defended until the end by internet fans; literally has thousands of online dorks logging on to complain anytime they lose a match or don't get pushed right)

Post: #5
12-29-2019 08:23 AM

Good Job Roman!

[Image: wallpaper2you-64426-20191117182800923.jpg]
2x Tag Team Champion W/ Vita Valentine
1xExtreme Champion
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Roman Offline
Official Official In The XWF

XWF FanBase:
Green as Grass

(sloppy in the ring; botches moves regularly; shows up when fans are hoping for anyone else)

Post: #6
12-29-2019 05:25 PM


Wanna hook up?

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Roman Offline
Official Official In The XWF

XWF FanBase:
Green as Grass

(sloppy in the ring; botches moves regularly; shows up when fans are hoping for anyone else)

Post: #7
12-31-2019 02:17 PM

Does my breath stink or something?

(Roman cups his hand to his mouth and checks to find all is good.)

Huh... Maybe she's just a dyke or something.

(Roman shrugs and walks away.)

[Image: Banner1.jpg]
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