THURSDAY NIGHT ANARCHY
14TH NOVEMBER 2019
FATAL FOUR WAY JUNKYARD MATCH

I escaped the junkyard first, ahead of Vita, Maxine, and Noah. What a great win.

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SATURDAY NIGHT SAVAGE
2ND ROUND LETHAL LOTTERY KNOCKOUT TOURNAMENT
16TH NOVEMBER 2019
With Ruby vs Tony Santos and Box Office Brian O'Haire

Ruby and I bet Santos and O'Haire to make it to the Semi Finals of Lethal Lottery. Great win.

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WELLINGTON, NEW ZEALAND
TUESDAY 19TH NOVEMBER 2019
ENROUTE TO WELLINGTON AIRPORT

I had been home a day when I received news who my Semi Final Lethal Lottery Tournament partner was. None other than new kid on the block Amjetkun Socio. We were to take on Ruby and Vita Valenteen, and Fuzz and Big Shanks. Really big guns. Which means we were ranked outsiders.

There was no time to send my private jet back to the States, and I thought it best that as I was the senior partner to bring Mr. Socio to New Zealand to train with me.

So I was on my way to the airport to pick up Mr. Socio who had just arrived. I sent a text asking where would he like to meet me and I received a text saying:


I didn't know much about this guy but this text sounded ominous. I eventually pulled up to the airport, got out and went into the airport to look for him.



////////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!!%^$#%^&$*&^$#^*%&%*^$#% SWITCH!

Bro I'm not even sure how this shit works but apparently I'm gonna narrate the fuck outta my own parts. That's right you've never been righter, it's that All Day All Nighter, Amjetkun Socio up in this bitch!

Ok wow so I guess I'm supposed to meet up with my new partner and go back to his place while we train. At least people are finally on board with the program and I don't need to surprise them and break into their house anymore, fuck! I had to break in when it was time for Vita Valenteen to let me stay with her, and I had to use stolen information to even FIND Fuzz's gottdamn safe house last round when he was my partner but you better believe I found that shit and let myself right in!

What's this tell us bro? It tells us Mastermind is already using his brain better than Big D used his last round. Ha ha remember that bullshit, guys? Remember Big D's whole argument and claim to fame last round was that he used his brain before the match? And then he still fuckin' lost to me and Fuzz!? Good times bro! Fuckin' loser! Shit bro I think this is where I should say I digress but I'm not really 100% sure what that word means so I'm kinda guessing. Hope it fits here.

Anyway yeah let's get back to what's happening at the airport. So we got this Mastermind fellow who knows damn well I'm the most valuable tag partner he's ever had in his life so he's rushing over to pick my ass up and take me back to his place to live eat and train, since ya know, I'm living off the grid right now dude so I don't HAVE a place to live.

That's fucked, right broheimers? I've somehow made my way all the way to the big semi-final round of the Anabolical Lottery and I'm fuckin' homeless as shit! Ha ha ha!

Fuck I digressed again I think. Ok so back on track I'm at the airport waiting on Mastermind. I sent his ass a text saying it's time to get pumped but he's nowhere to be seen so I'm just gonna get started lifting, because I'm not here to wait I'm here to train! I pull a fuckin' big ass dumbbell out of my bag and I start curling that shit right in the middle of the airport! I ain't talking about no bitch curls either bro I'm doing slow ass Zottman Curls because you know they light those forearms up like Christmas time baby and I need that burn! I'm going light today, just alternating this 100lbs dumbbell from arm to arm after every 50 reps.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

Yeah bro just out of nowhere I break out with a high intensity scream to get the blood really pumping. Like a dozen people all around me jumped out of their socks and almost lost their shit when I started screaming but I didn't give two shits because I'm not here to be quiet I'm here to train.

"RRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAUUUUGGGHHH!!!!!"

Dude, people are slowly starting to make their way away from my general area and they're trying to get their kids to stop looking at me but I bet those kids are curious how to get swolt as fuck bro THAT'S RIGHT I SAID SWOLT AS FUCK BRO!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHAAAAAAAHHHHHHUUAHAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

Bro I'm getting louder and louder up in this bitch and I don't even care. If this was a Planet Fitness they would have sounded the "Lunk Alarm" like 5,000 times by now and called the freakin' National Guard on my ass. They might even shoot me with a tranquilizer dart knowing those fucks! I BET THEY'D FUCKIN' DIGRESS THE FUCK OUTTA ME BRO! Still have no idea if I'm using that word right.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

My whole face, nah fuck it dude my whole damn body is turning red as FUCK bro every time I scream and do another Zottman curl! The veins in my neck and in my forehead are flexing n' shit! Fuck yeah this is a good ass pump!

Oh shit! I think I see Mastermind down there!

"FUCK YEAH BRO, OVER HERE! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

Of course I keep lifting and screaming like the pimp that I am.

"BRO! MASTERMIND! GET THE FUCK OVER HERE AND SPOT ME! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

Now that he's here maybe I can start benching.


////////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!!%^$#%^&$*&^$#^*%&%*^$#% SWITCH!

So I'm at the airport looking for my tag team partner and I notice people running away from a particular area. I wonder if there's a bomb scare. That's when I start hearing psychotic screaming.

I walk over to the area that the screaming is coming from, and notice a guy doing what looks like Zottman curls, in the middle of the airport of all places.

Wait a minute... I take a look at my phone. This guy looks exactly like my tag team partner Mr. Socio! Oh fuck it is him. What the fuck is he on?

So I make my way over to him and he sees me.

"Dude what the fuck are you doing?"

"BRO! MASTERMIND! SPOT ME! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

"Spot you why?"

I look around to see Security forming in a group to decide what to do. That's when I realize that Mr. Socio wants to... bench press??

"Dude this is my home town airport, we need to leave now!"

Mr. Socio puts his Dumbbell away and pulls a fully loaded barbell out that somehow looks bigger than the bag was. Mr. Socio kicks the backs off of several chairs, getting them ready for him to lay across so he can bench press. I was like watching, thinking what the fuck is this guy on? Surely he's not that serious.

"Dude I just said we need to leave now!"

That's when out of nowhere Mr Socio starts to flip out. It's like he goes to another place in his head.


////////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!!%^$#%^&$*&^$#^*%&%*^$#% SWITCH!

FUCK BRO! I'm back to narrating this shit myself as Mastermind seems like he's either sedated or just in total fuckin' awe of the masterpiece that is The All Day All Nighter's god bod. You heard right bro I'm all about that GOD BOD while all these other out of shape jagbags like SHIT SHANK and RUBY are sporting some of the softest dad bods to ever exist bro! Like seriously would it have hurt either one of them to actually pick up a weight or put down a carb?

Hey Shit Shank! Couldn't you have stayed away from bread for a little while so you don't look so fuckin' stupid and ugly on TV compared to a gottdamn paragon of pump like me?

Hey Ruby! You ugly ass fuckin' sack of dead dogshit weight. Were you just pounding down donuts and malts that whole week you no-showed your week 1 promo obligations and let PETER GILMOUR CARRY YOU? Seriously bitch, your lazy fuckin' ass couldn't be bothered to put the work in? Hell, if it weren't for Peter keeping you relevant, nobody would haven even remembered who the fuck you were by the time you finally did put in any effort! You do realize if by some hilariously slim chance you win this Trenbolone Lotto tourney, like everyone n' their mammas will know gottdamn well it's only because of Peter carrying your ass when you were slacking like a ! Bitch we ain't even getting started and you're already buried under Peter Gilmour's greatness! You are beneath him! And you're going to pose a threat to us? US? What? You? Bro. You're worse than Gilmour. You're one of the few cuckblowers in history to be carried to a win BY Gilmour instead of the other way around bitch! Why are you so bad? Why?

Why can't you be like Shit Shank and be ONE place better than Peter? Wink wink bitch!

Fuck I digressed the living shit outta you two losers and I'm just narrating a scene right now bruhz! Imagine when I get to talkin' shit about your dumb asses later! Fuck!

Ok ok so back on track, I'm struggling with this 1st person narrative bullshit all you fags think makes your promos sound so fancy but I'm trying! All these thoughts passed me by and I still got Mastermind just staring at me with his jaw dropped... so I just scream at his ass.

"Bro! I said spot me on the fuckin' bench!”

I lay my ass on top of the chairs I kicked the backs off of. They make a decent enough bench in an emergency scenario like this. I ask Mastermind to hand the barbell off to me and his dumb ass can't even pick the damn thing up! Bro it's like he couldn't even dead-lift what I can bench press! That's fucked!!!

Ok ok finally he's putting some ass grease into it and muscling the fuck up. He grunts as he lifts the bar and steps toward me to hand it off to my big ass gorilla hands, and......... YEAH BITCH! Got it!

I grip the dogshit outta the barbell and I go to town broh, I fuckin' go HAM on that shit busting out rep after rep like I'm firing off a gottdamn machine gun or some stupid shit. Bro I'm killin' it!

59

60

61

Like seriously this is well over 700lbs and I'm already almost to a hundo? How am I this fuckin' jacked?!?

95

97

100

"FUCK YEAH!!!!! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!”

Alright now we need to turn up the juice which as we all know means I need to work those fuckin' lungs and vocal chords!

"RRRRUUUUUAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

109

123

148

"FFFFFWWUUUAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

199

232

Bro how much time passed? Like I'm seriously asking broh because look I'm about to hit 400 reps at damn near 1,000kg! That's right bitch we up in the kilograms now, fuck a pound!

691

745

900

"BAM! DONE BITCH! DONE!"

I just throw the barbell back and I guess it hits Mastermind or some shit but who gives a fuck, I'M FUCKIN' JACKED BRAH!!! Bro my fuckin' arms are burning like a muh'fucker right now. THESE GOTTDAMN GUNS ARE ON FUCKIN' FIYA!


////////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!!%^$#%^&$*&^$#^*%&%*^$#% SWITCH!
Backtracking to reality with Mastermind. Socio had just pulled a giant barbell out of his bag after setting up some chairs to bench press on and then this is what really happened.........

So then Mr Socio lays across the tops of four chairs he kicked the backs off of. He's literally made a bench out of chairs he broke. He asks me for the giant barbell that's somehow bigger than the bag it came out of. I go to pick it up but it's fucking heavy! I pull it across the floor toward Socio and then I finally put everything I have into lifting the bar up and resting them in Socio's palms. He immediately starts to scream at the top of his lungs like a raging psychopath as he slowly pushes the barbell up.

"Hey dude, if I can barely lift it off the ground, you probably shouldn't try to bench this much weight."

He ignores me. Mr. Socio starts roaring like an animal so loud it hurts my ears as he completes one full rep and then the chairs underneath him give out! Mr. Socio falls to the floor with the weight of the barbell landing across his upper chest. It looks like its crushed him. OMG is he dead? I look around for help, or for a sign of a new LL partner if that's easier. I see neither.

Oh look, that quickly Mr. Socio woke up and is injecting himself with a syringe so unrealistically large it looks like it should have the ACME label splashed across it in bright yellow....................


////////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!!%^$#%^&$*&^$#^*%&%*^$#% Promo time with Mastermind!
(OOC: The video is part of the RP, please watch it. I wanted to get out of my comfort zone by trying this.)




////////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!!%^$#%^&$*&^$#^*%&%*^$#% SWITCH!

"BRUH!"

Mastermind snaps out of his "promo game face" and looks at me.

"That promo fuckin' blew chunks bro! Hell yeah!"

-_-