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X-treme Wrestling Federation BOARDS » Savage Boards » "Savage Saturday Night" RP Board
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DUSK! A pretty zombie tale
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Lux Online now or has been in the last 30 mins
Pinretty Deadly
TITLE - HMW



XWF FanBase:
Some of everyone

(cheered; very rarely plays dirty but isn't lame either; many likable qualities)


Post: #1
06-12-2019 05:04 PM

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The shot fades to an opening on Vita Valenteen. Except she doesn't look her usual self. No, instead it looks like someone has applied a gray tone color filter to her entire existence, making her look as bland, dumpy and uninteresting as humanly possible. A literal black hole of intriguing or attractive qualities. Anyway, when we meet up with her she seems to be walking down a school hallway, shoulders hunched, carrying a stack of books close to her chest like she's trying to hide behind them.

(Voiceover)It's always so hard starting over. New school. New place. No friends. It's doubly hard when you're a literal blank slate of a human being with no discernible personality. **Sigh** If only an absurdly attractive but mildly dangerous seeming boy would take an interest in me for no reason.

The shot quickly cuts to Vita's character sitting in a classroom. She appears to be doodling pictures of hot boys in her notebook.

(Teacher from off camera) AHEM! Frankie, Earth to Frankie!

Vita/Frankie suddenly realizes she's been called on. She lifts her head up, only to reveal she's suffering from a huge nose bleed. The entire class busts out in raucous laughter. Frankie looks like she's about to die of embarrassment. But then, the shot closes in on the only one in the class who's not laughing. Corey Smith leans in as though fascinated. His hair is stylized like a cartoonish green swoop, and he's wearing a Rancid t-shirt and skinny jeans that are so tight you can probably see the outline of his entire penis. It occurs to you he looks a lot like Zane Norrison. He licks his lips at the sight of the droplets of blood splattering on Frankie's desk.

The shot cuts again. Frankie is seen walking home, with blood stained tissues jammed in her nostrils. She is suddenly alerted to a presence behind her, and she turns around, gasping a bit in surprise.

Oh....hey!

Hey. Zane stares at her with an awkward intensity, like he's trying to go for something smoldering and sexy but it just comes off rapey instead. Saw you bleeding in science class. That was pretty cool. He licks his lips.

Oh you d-did? Frankie stammers. Nobody's ever said that before.

What, that they saw you bleeding?

No, that I'm cool. One of the blood stained tissues falls out of her nose, revealing a nostril full of pussy clotted blood.

Oh. You wanna hang out some time?

Frankie suddenly looks abashed. You really want to hang out with me?!

Yeah. Totally. Zane reaches down to pick up the bloody tissue. Frankie holds her had out to take it from him, but Zane instead puts it in his mouth and starts chewing. Mmmmm. Type O-?

Frankie blushes. How'd you know?!

Zane smiles. It's a zombie thing. He cuts a hard look to the camera as the movie's title screen pops up.

[Image: z5d01928e721b5.gif]


Another abrupt scene shift. This time we see Joachim Bright speaking into his cell phone.

Look Frankie, I know I'm just your mildly catty gay BFF who only exists to try to talk some sense into you, but I'm just not sure I have a good feeling about your new boyfriend Zane!

We then see Frankie laying on her stomach on her bed, in her abysmally cutesy pink bed room. She has more wadded up tissues jammed up her nose now. But why?! He's so cute and I love him!

I thought he was a zombie?!

He is, but it's okay, he's a hot zombie!

Joachim massages his forehead in annoyance. But that's just it Frankie, zombies aren't supposed to be hot! They're supposed to be hideous vicious abominations. A nightmarish reminder of humanity's deep seated and collective fear of death! Zane is like if you took a zombie, focus grouped it to death, glitter bombed it, and sold it for mass market consumption at Wal-mart. Does none of that seem just a little bit weird to you?

But that jawline though! Frankie responds dreamily.

Ugh, girl you're about to make me go from “tolerably sassy homosexual” to “scorched earth yaaaaas queen”! Oh wait, hold up a sec my dog's barking. Joachim goes to the window and opens the curtains. He gasps in horror and the shot reveals what he sees. Zane is in the backyard, digging his hands deep into a Cocker Spaniels entrails. He rips out the poor animal's intestines and begins to chew on them. Joachim screams. JESUS FRANKIE, ZANE IS IN MY BACKYARD EATING MY DOG!!!

Zane notices Joachim through the window and stops eating long enough to smile and wave at him in a friendly, nonchalant manner.

Frankie rolls onto her back, and lets out a blissful sigh. He's such a bad boy.....

The shot switches up again, and this time Frankie and Zane seem to be running away from something. Zane pulls Frankie into a darkened alley and proceeds to talk to her in a hushed but urgent tone. I'm so sorry I got you into this Frankie, this isn't your war! Oh no! Zane slaps a hand over Frankie's mouth to quiet her as a mob of stupidly pretty sparkly vampires tear past their hiding place. Zane uncovers Frankie's mouth when he's sure they're gone. Frankie's nose appears to be bleeding yet again, and Zane takes a moment to slurp the blood off his hand before continuing. The war between pretty zombies and pretty vampires has been raging for over 1000 years and shows no sign of letting up. I....I'm sorry, it's too much to ask of you....

Frankie takes Zane's hand and holds it, bringing it up to her face so she can plant a bloody boogery kiss on it. No Zane! I love you, and your problems are my problems! I'm sure that together we can take down Sarha, queen of the pretty vampires over the course of 4 more sequels with the potential of a spin-off TV series optioned to the Sci-Fi channel!

The shot cuts again to approximately 2.3 seconds of a clip of Sarah Lacklan, which is what our attorney guaranteed us we could show before risking legal reprisal.

[Image: tumblr_oi8v5jbzSs1sgcmdho1_500.gif]

Okay, back to Zane and Frankie.

God, she's awful.

I know, right?

Frankie's nose spurts blood right into Zane's face like a fire hose. But this just turns him on, and he grabs her by the back of the head and draws her in, but the scene ends so abruptly we're not quite sure whether he was about to eat her or make out with her.

[Image: z5d01928e721b5.gif]



COMING TO THEATERS.....hopefully never.....


The trailer ends and we now appear at what looks to be a focus group meeting. Corey stands at the head of the table, with a bunch of average Americans seated around a circular table. And if you're thinking that Corey just did something similar to this not that long ago I assure you you're mistaken and in no way, shape, or form, are we running out of ideas.

So everyone, what did you think?

[Image: uqKrgM1.gif?noredirect]

Thank you, voice of Jon Lovitz. Anyone else?

A middle aged man leans forward in his seat, looking like he's fixin' to opine. Now what I don't get is why that Zane feller don't look like the zombies on The Walking Dead!

Yeah, I can field that one. You see, by being stupidly attractive it makes Zane accessible and nonthreatening to junior high girls, who are generally big fat idiots with tons of disposable income from their disengaged parents who would rather drop them a $50 and tell them to be on their way than have to listen to them bleat insufferably about how Becky looked like a huge slut today. That make sense?

The middle aged guy blinks a few times. I'm....not sure?

A junior high girl sitting at the other end of the table, who is clearly completely oblivious to the fact that Corey just dropped a scorching truth bomb on her entire demographic, is waving her hand frantically in the air. Corey sighs. ….yes?

CAN I HAVE ZANE'S PHONE NUMBER?! I PROMISE I WON'T STALK HIM!

Corey shrugs. Hell, I can do you one better. He takes out a file folder and slides it across the table towards her. That's his whole entire HR file. Have at it.

The girl snaps it up hungrily. I'M GOING TO FASHION A DOLL OUT OF ALL HIS DEAD SKIN CELLS! She bolts out of her chair and right out the door. Corey and the rest of the focus group watch her go.

Do ya think maybe you shouldn't a done that?

Zane's a big boy, he can handle himself. So, yay or nay on the movie?

The entire group responds “NAY” in unison.

Oh good. Motion adjourned. Let's flush this dook so I can get on to something more productive like binge watching Deep Space 9 in my underwear. Thanks everyone, you're free to go!

The focus group files out, but they're soon replaced by Vita Valenteen and Joachim Bright. Corey smiles when he sees them and holds his arms open for Vita. She hugs him and plants a kiss on his lips. Many, many thanks for being a good sport, lovey!

Anytime! Good job Corey! Vita responds, with her typical ray of sunshine positivity.

Joachim sidles up next to them. Yes Corey, I have to admit this exercise in you sublimating your extensive deep seated insecurities about Zane being cuter than you came off without a hitch.

Well, heh, I couldn't have done it without.... Corey smiles sheepishly, basking in a self congratulatory glow until....

processing....

[Image: giphy.gif]

processing....

Corey suddenly wheels around on Joachim, eyes narrowed with an expression that's a wall of pure stank. Fuck you! Joachim ducks out of camera view, corpsing into a spate of giggles as the shot abruptly cuts to black.

[Image: lmt9uk5.jpg]

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[-] The following 2 users Like Lux's post:
Drew Archyle (06-12-2019), Zane Norrison (06-12-2019)
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