Now this is the story all about how, My life got flipped, turned upside down. And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there and i'll tell you just how me Thomas founded the S&J Enterprise. Well it all got started one day when I was waiting outside of the gun shop one day. Then Thomas walked up next to me and said some very friendly words.

But us saying those words was a huge mistake. Now that day was a SUNDAY!!! and Sundays are my lazy days! I like to go buy a new pistol or some new frags or something every Sunday which I did but when Thomas said hi to me is when someone over heard us. The man turned out to be a cop. Since me and Thomas are the most wanted men in the galaxy, the cop spoke into his little tiny walkie talkie


When I heard that asshole yell that I knew me and Thomas were about to get into some high impact action in a matter of seconds. When that guy said get all the army he literally meant it! there was at least 15 tanks, 20 helicopters, 50 infantry units, and 5 artillery units. I whispered to Thomas.

Me and Thomas then jumped high in the air and I pulled out my ARMEGEDON and Thomas pulled out
THE pistol. I sprayed down a lot of guys in mid-air until I finally hit the ground. Thomas just kept yelling "HEAD-SHOT!" after every head-shot he got. I placed my favorite assult rifle in the whole world down on the sidewalk and then started punching the shit out of some guys and maybe kick some balls so hard I literally got ball juice on my new boots. Thomas put his pistol back into his bottomless pocket and did the exact same as I was. We were punch, kicking, head butting, ripping, everything we could think of to hurt these guys.

We agreed that this is getting boring so I asked Thomas if he wanted to listen to some music while we did this shit. He said sure and he then pulled out a jukebox out from his pocket and started looking through his music selection. I continued to kill guys while Thomas was picking some music to listen to.

"How hard is it to pick music from a damn jukebox!?"

"This kind of stuff takes time David! I was thinking between this one or this one"



"How about you let the viewer choose!"

"that's a good idea we let who ever is reading this pick which song they want to listen to!"

"Now that that's settled. Lets kick some more ass!"

Me and Thomas then continued to kick the shit out of those soldiers. It took at least 10 more minutes until we made it down to one more soldier. He begged and begged for his life but me and Thomas started to play rock, paper, scissors for who gets to kill this wimp.

"How do you always win dammit!?"

"You always pick Rock..."

"Because Rock crushes everything! it breaks scissors and it crushes paper! I mean C'mon how is the Rock just gonna let the piece of paper just sit on him?!"

"Because fuck you that's why."

Thomas then picked the little man up with one arm twirled him around a little then decided to hug him and say...

"I'll name you Mr. Cuddlesworth! I will feed you, keep you in a cage, make you exercise 23 hours a day, and then let sprinkles play with you in that extra hour!"

Thomas has always been one fucked up individual. But hey, I'm not going to be the one to tell him no. He won rock, paper, scissors so he gets to do what he wants with. When we got home to our underground base, Thomas locked up "Mr. Cuddlesworth and then I approached Thomas asking him a question.

"Thomas how would you like to start a new slave company?!"

"SLAVES!? of course I will start a slave company with you! I've always wanted a slave partner. Amber sayed she didn't want any part of my evil schemes...that WHORE!!!"

Me and Thomas heard the various noises coming from ambers room aka "THE PIPE" we then started planning out how we were going to build the building, where we're going to put the slaves, and where the building will be. we built it directly outside of the hole to get inside of our cave. Me and Thomas kept arguing whether to call it Skulley/Jaimeson or Jaimeson/Skulley. Since Thomas had the building materials he made the sign say J/S enterprise...that bastard. But I'm naming this damn story S/J because fuck him. Then we continued to build the building until it was all the way complete. It was beautiful. Once it was done me and Thomas split up to go search for some slaves!