Dear Journal,

I can't get over my start in XWF. I won gold before ever having my first official match, and when I realized the hassle it would be to keep that Championship, I simply allowed Kid Fool to pin me so the burden of constantly look over my shoulder was someone else's to bear.

Then there was my first match, a rough loss that everyone knows not to give Tate the full credit for the win, but it's difficult not to feel empty inside about losing my debut. I have talked myself up to the level I know I compete at, but with EDWARD's distraction allowing for my demise, the record books with forever show my with an L.

I will survive. It won't be easy to overcome the frustration I feel, but if I can begin my journey NOW and rack up the wins I'm capable of, losing to Genie Tate will be a long forgotten blip on the radar of my XWF career. If I can overcome not one, but TWO opponents at once, management will see things for how they truly are and be left with no choice but to plant me in a title picture. In the words of my newest rival, I can win more shinies.

EDWARD is quite an interesting character. I can't figure out where the hell he came from or why he exists, I just know his motivation for going on: gold. As much as I hate to admit, EDWARD and I are alike in that sense, even if our reasonings are polar opposites. He wants to collect the belts because they are shiny and amuse his simpleton mind, meaning nothing to him for what their value ACTUALLY holds. He already believes himself to be a true warrior, a World Champion of you will, yet he holds little morals of a champion. A real warrior knows when you are face to face with an adversary, you want to go at them on equal footing and have your chance to prove yourself, not have someone interfere in the way that soldier in Game of Thrones interrupted the intense battle between Ned Stark and Jaime Lannister. EDWARD is that cowardly soldier, he plunged his spear into my leg as I was fighting Genie Tate, proving he is no warrior.

Unlike EDWARD, I AM a warrior. I know those belts that he takes for granted mean everything in our business, that you aren't one of the gladiators of the squared circle unless you're carrying the strap around your waist. He can argue, if he's even capable, that he's held gold but we all know that anyone can hold a belt that's 24/7, in isn't too hard to sneak up on someone. Pretty sure someone's hoe did it some place else. If EDWARD wants to prove himself as the top of the food chain, he gets his chance Wednesday. And if he can't, it's gonna be a long road for him as long as I'm driving in the lane beside him. But I don't plan on cruising next to him, I'm gonna be miles ahead by the time the others if Big D begins running hot throughout XWF.

And then there's Jake Avery. This guy has been relatively quiet, which makes him a threat. It's like how the kids in high school likely to shoot people are the ones who keep to themselves, I see Jake Avery as that guy. He's a wild card in this match. He knows that me and EDWARD have beef, and if he's smart, he'll wait til we beat the hell out of each other and then pick up the pieces.

But I won't allow my hatred for EDWARD to make me forget about Avery. As much as I want to get my hands on EDWARD specifically, I want to win more. I will get a shot at EDWARD one on one Saturday in our Parking Lot Brawl, so if EDWARD runs and hides from me Wednesday, I will gladly take Jake Avery apart and take the victory. That's all that matters, getting my hand raised at the end of the match. Doesn't matter who I pin, or how I do it, victory is the key to achieving my goals.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous anything can happen in that ring. For all I know, EDWARD and Avery could be butt buddies planning to 2 on 1 me, and that would be hard to defend. But I have to. I can't let myself down. I won't let myself down. There's no coward hiding under the ring this time, there's no surprises waiting to throw me off my game. It's just me vs EDWARD vs Jake Avery. The way that it should be, the way that it will be. And in the end, it shall be me getting my hand raised and climbing up the ladder to bigger and better competition and opportunities.

And that ain't no story, it's the Cold Big D truth.

-Big D

~note to self: send Steve Sayors an apology gift basket~

June 2019 XWF Superstar of the Month
2019 Relentless Fishing Contest Winner
1x XWF World Heavyweight Champion
1x bWo World Heavyweight Champion [despite what Miss Furry or James J. Dildo says]
1x NWF World Heavyweight Champion
2x XWF Xtreme Champion [current]
2x XWF TV Champion
1x XWF Internet Champion
1x NWF World Tag Team Champion (w/Slim)
1x NWF Xtreme Champion
1x NLCW Slamfest Champion
1x LCW Hardcore Champion
3x WWF X-Division Champion
1x WWF World Tag Team Champion (w/Seth Flash)
1x WWF Dark Champion
1x WWF TV Champion
1x EGW Fury Champion
3x XWF Federweight Champion
4x XWF Heavymetalweight Champion
1x 420* Cruiserweight Champion
2x CMW Hardcore Champion
1x XHW T.V. Champion
1x WXC Hardcore Champion
1x XPW U.S. Champion
1x WLFC Tag Team Champion w/Chance
1x WWC T.V. Champion
1x WWC European Champion
1x WWF 24/7Hardcore Champion
2x WLFC 24/7 Hardcore Champion


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