Random stands behind a podium in his true form sniffing opium, he does line after after line after line. He raises his head, eyes glazed like a Krispy Kreme donuts, he tries to speak but all that expels from his mouth is drool. He drops his head on the podium resting it there for the moment, then back up once more. More composed now he addresses his audience who has been waiting patiently for his speech.

Ladies and gentlemen! I come to you tonight in great pain. My opponent Calypso is refusing to take me seriously. He's glossed over me, he's skimmed me like a book. Do I look like a book to you?!

Random exposes his pale white alien body.

No I am not a fucking book! I am made of living organic material just like all of you. Not only am I being disrespected in the ring, I am being disrespected outside of it as well! This fucking Blue Tango guy is slithering his way through the streets looking for pedophiles. He's a snake! Now let me be very clear here, pedophiles equals bad, but that's what I fucking do, I take care of the bad! Now, granted I've slacked off a bit as of late, but you don't see me going down to the bald guy gapped toothed factory slapping the cock out of his mouth and doing his job now do you?

No!

No, no you don't one bit.

Random steps from the podium with the microphone pacing back and forth as he continues his speech.

He also thinks I don't know my own identity. Now at first yes I was a little fuzzy there for a moment, wasn't sure who I was, wasn't sure where I was, and more importantly I didn't know how I got here. All of that has now been answered! That people, that's how little he cares about our match, his head is so far up his own ass he's unaware of the threat that's right in front of him. It’s abundantly clear he's not ready for the semi homosexual, dick hardening, drug induced ass beating he's going to receive at the hands of me…Michael Graves!

Random goes to pull off a mask, but stops and looks back up to the shocked crowd.

Gotcha! Wouldn't that be Random? Good thing for you Calypso you're still facing me and not Michael Graves. Unfortunately for you, you're facing me, new season buddy it's gonna be five star entertainment from me. I am here, I am somewhat queer, and I got a lot of people to prove wrong. Like many of you out there in the crowd I too have lost before, I've lost matches, I’ve lost my manager, Rest in peace Gary Busey, and I've most recently lost my trainer Paul. So people! I feel your pain! I am with you in this! And you too are in this with me! We as a unit will take the title, take XWF, and take back our world! IT'S TIME TO INTRODUCE YOU! TO THE WORLD!!!!

The crowd erupts in a thunderous cheer.

The meth heads!

Yeah!

The coke fiends!

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

The heroin addicts!

Uhhhhhhhhh!

Now unfortunately the pot heads couldn't make it, they along with the acid trippers and the mollie poppers are all at a pretty nice rave. But! I have what I need right here in front of me. Underneath your chairs are papers with every known pedophile in the city. A lot of these people have been on Dateline, as if public embarrassment and jail time wasn't enough to drive the point home, they still continue to pedo. This! This is why it falls on us, we will show Blue Tango how to really crackdown on pedophiles! We will show him the power of what we can do, and tomorrow he will witness and ultimately understand the power of Random. He will know me by the end of this I promise you that. My people who is your savior?

Random!

Who is your master?

Random!

Who is your god?

Random!

My people once more, who is your god?

RANDOM!!!!

The crowd erupts as smile peels across his face.

Then do as your god I command you to do my bidding! Purge this city of the wretched! Do it for all of my precious children, do it to show the world you're not wastes of life, do it…….do it because I said so.

The crowd erupts while throwing their fist in the air, Random nods his head and the crowd of drug addicts flood into the city. One of the cronies behind Random plugs in his ipod to the speaker system.





Random hovers down into an empty courtyard below and begins walking behind his followers. Quickly the crowd turns the city upside down as pedophiles are dragged into the streets.Houses, businesses, and cars are set ablaze, flames tower above the city while embers fade off like fireflies in the night sky. Random casually strolls along with his arms crossed in his robe, admiring the destruction he set in motion.

No mercy! These scum did not offer any, so none shall be given. This is the new justice system to all those who prey on the helpless. Strike fear into the hearts of world so we might sway others who choose to do such acts to never attempt them again, for they will feel our justice swiftly!

Random! Random! Random!

His followers cheer his name as hundreds of pedophiles are being beheaded, stabbed, and mutilated beyond recognition. The streets run red with the blood of the perverted till the crowd massacres it's way to the city limits.

Bring me Calypso so I can show him how dealing with the evil slime of world is properly done.

Sir, we found no trace of him.

What?!

Random turns around noticing a sign behind him “Now Leaving Phoenix”.

Fuck! He's in LA not Phoenix, alright guys pack it up we gotta go a bit farther west.

Random and the crowd march out of Phoenix as the screen fades to blackness.