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GILLY'S THE WEAK LINK - nah you suck too
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"Dark Warrior" Micheal Graves
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#1
06-26-2018, 10:51 PM



===========Tuesday 06/26/2018===========
=====Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania =====


The cab door creaks as it opens. I step out of the cab, close my eyes and inhale a deep breath of the warm summer’s air as I smile. It’s good to be home, even if it is just for the night. A loud honk pulls me from the moment. The driver is in a hurry to move me along and go on to his next fare. I walk to the back of the car and retrieve my bags just as her voice call down to me from the front porch.

Kourtni Perkins
“HEY BABY!”

My heart flutters as I look up to see her smiling face as the races down the steps to meet me. I drop the bags to the curb and scoop her up into my arms. Our lips meet in a warm and wet embrace as I spin us around.

Micheal Graves
“I’ve missed you so much!”

The skin on her nose crinkles up as she smiles.

Kourtni Perkins
“I’ve missed you too babe!”

I know what you’re wondering. Since when does Micheal Graves have a female in his life and who is Kourtni? Well, she’s a girl that I met while I was out rehabbing my knee. I’d love to tell you this grand story about how we met and all that, but honestly it’s rather boring. We were introduced through a mutual friend who thought that we’d make a good match. We’ve been dating now for just over two months and so far that friend was right, things between us have been great.

Kourtni Perkins
“So, what are we doing for your night in town?”

I place her back to the ground, her bare feet warmed by the stone walkway that leads to the front porch. Smiling, I stare deeply into her eyes as gently grip her waist.

Kourtni Perkins
“Well, we could go out to dinner if you feel up to it.”

Puzzled I ask;

Micheal Graves
“Why wouldn’t I want to take such a beautiful girl out on the town?”

She breaks eye contact with me and looks down to my chest. I know what she’s about to say next.

Kourtni Perkins
“I was just thinking, with what happened at Savage, maybe you’d rather stay in for the night.”

I couldn’t help but grin at the idea of staying in on account of a loss. Hiding from the world like some sort of leper just because I failed to prevail in a wrestling match.

Micheal Graves
“It’s really not a big deal hun. I mean, I lost to the Universal Champion, the top guy and I didn’t go down easy. Engy had to fight for that win. I can live with that.”

She looked back up to me, shocked by my optimistic response.

Kourtni Perkins
“So you’re not upset about the loss?”

Micheal Graves
“Not at all.”

Kourtni Perkins
“I was worried… I’ve never known you to tap out in a match.”

Micheal Graves
“Never have before, that was definitely a first.”

Her brow crinkles with a look of concern.

Kourtni Perkins
“Did he hurt you babe?”

Micheal Graves
“No, I just made the smart call. The dude’s taken out some big names with that move and I couldn’t risk getting injured right before my and Cads title shot.”

I can see the relief in her eyes as she smiles up at me. She’s quick to change the subject.

Kourtni Perkins
“Want me to make reservations to Altius?”

I can feel my face twist and contort as I wince at the idea. Fancy high-to-do places like that have never been my bag. Give me a burger and some extra salty fries, and I’m a happy guy.

Micheal Graves
“If that’s where you want to go.”

Kourtni Perkins
“Or, if you prefer, we could just go out for some cheese steak or something.”

Cheese steak over fine dining? God I love this girl, and I’m in a good place right now. I’m finding myself coming to the realization that records and titles are beginning to mean less to me. As my career continues to wind down and I race ever closer to the finish line, I realize what truly matters in this life, and then I wonder… How long do I have left in this business?


===========PROMO===========

”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
“It happens to everyone, circumstances beyond our control cause events to play out differently than we would have imagined. I can say that I’ve had this happen to me many times before. At Savage I went into that ring confident that I could take The Engineer down. I had played the match out in my head many times, and while I knew there was a chance that I’d lose, I was optimistic that I could control the environment and walk out with the upset, and make no mistake, I knew that if I won, it would be an upset victory. Just like when I challenged Chris Chaos one-on-one for the Universal Title over a year ago. I was fighting out of my league then too. That’s the thing though, I like the challenge. I’d rather have my ass put down one-hundred times over against the top tier in the business, than take one win away from a guy that has no business in the ring with me to begin with. That’s the difference between me and Chris Chaos. I’m in this business to challenge myself to be the best version of myself that I can be. Chris Chaos is in this business to convince the world that he’s a star, even if everything that he’s accomplished has come from being a lying, cheating, conniving, snake in the grass who’d rather pad his record with easy wins than find himself in a situation where the odds don’t favor him. That’s why he’s quick to brag about beating me back when I first returned from a ten year absence. That’s why he claims a victory over a guy like Engy, but fails to mention it was a tag match, and that he actually stole the pin from Gilly, or that Engy’s partner bailed on him. Keep in mind that this is the same guy who litters his recorded match history with notations in a effort to save face and explain away his losses like that somehow saves him face. Chris Chaos wants the world to believe that he’s the best this business has to offer, but I’m here to tell you right now that not only is he not the best, he’s not even all that good.

Look at the facts people. Chris Chaos came into the company and quickly rose to the top. Nobody can ever take that away from him. For a moment, as short as it was, Chris Chaos was the man. Nowadays, Chris Chaos is the one who can’t seem to hang with the top talent in this company, despite his efforts to throw that shade my way.

Chris Chaos, you want to talk stats and inability to beat top tier talent? Why don’t you remind the class what happened the last time that you faced an established singles competitor?

October 21st
SAVAGE
vs Mystery Competitor Which turned out of be Micheal Graves
Standard Match
Pinned by Graves and then was carried out of the arena by Druids


Heh, that’s right, I put you down like the fake ass bitch that you are, and Goddamn are you fake as fuck! You want to call me out because I apparently need to leech off of others to stay relevant? What in the blue hell do you call what you’re doing there Mr. Empire?

The second half of 2016 was inarguably shit for your career. You suffered loss after loss as you slowly fell down the card. With every effort you made to “find the old Chaos” and return to the top, you were met time after time with a roadblock that simply read, “No ”. So, what did you do to make your big comeback? What did you do to try and keep your name in the spotlight? You teamed up with your biggest enemy, the guy that you could never beat, Jim Caedus. Also, while we’re speaking of Caedus. You may have taken that man's life, but you never… EVER beat him. You just couldn’t, it was physically impossible for you. Jim Caedus, God rest his soul, was a real man, a real champion. Like myself, there wasn’t a challenge too big for him. He didn’t hide behind lies and propaganda. Instead, he would stare a challenge in the face and fuck it up. You couldn’t hold a candle to his greatness, and that’s why you and your Empire goons killed him. That, and the fact that Engy cashed in on your half of the titles, so you no longer needed Jim to make you look like gold.

After that you get back to singles action. A couple of pins over BWP, like that’s impressing anyone. A victory over a very green and very temporarily employed Erick Black.

Then BOOM! You take a loss to Finn Kuhn.

Finn fucking Kuhn!

You’re fucking inability to get the job done against Kuhn is directly responsible for me having to lay that poor kid down, TWICE!

After that, you realize that you’ve been out of the main event picture for so long that you were suddenly eligible to challenge for the TV title. Next thing we know, we’re treated to Chris Chaos taking on the likes of John Holiday, Mezian, Kenneth "Boobie" Williams, and Mezian. Yeah, I said Mezian twice! Now with a few “big wins” over small fish, you gain back a little of your confidence. You decide that you need more gold. Next thing I know, you pick up the gutter trash partner that I dumped solely because he has a guaranteed title shot, and you can use that to your advantage. You guys enter into the ring with what is essentially a handicap match, and are still considered lucky to walk away with the titles. Yeah, I’d play up that pin over Engy too if I were you, cause it’s likely the only one that you will have come by tag team or not!

So now that we’ve established this whole pot meet kettle scenario that you walked right into. Let’s take a look and some of the gems that you left for us in your promos.

Let's start with that story. That little tidbit that you put together to give us some insight into just who Chris Chaos actually is. In it, you revealed a lot of shit that I’d think you would rather keep private, but there’s one thing that you said that really stood out to me. One thing that I think the entire XWF Universe is begging that we delve deeper into, and that is this.

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Whoa bro! I know it’s 2018 and all, but reel that shit in! You have a reputation to maintain. You’re supposed to be the biggest and baddest motherfucker in the XWF today!

You’re not, but in your own mind, you think you are and how can you be this big bad ball of chaos when you’re admitting to the world that you try on mom’s lingerie and twiddle your taint all while dreaming of a big fat cock to shift your insides around? Is this really the image that you want to put out there bro? Do you really want to be Chris Chaos, the gender confused hasbeen? You talk about my identity crisis like it’s some sort of physical weakness that I have an assortment of looks, but you ignore the fact that you secretly want to get plowed by half the guys that you step into the ring with? How about after me and Cadryn take those tag belts from you guys, you do the world a favor and quit? I know a guy that can help ease you into the next stage of your career, one that you’ll be infinitely happier with.

Taking dick on the net.

Oh, and while I’m thinking about your cute little story about nerds, love, and heartbreak. I feel like I should point out something to you. You claim to have so much disdain for that nerd who runs with the “Gravy handle”, that you can’t even stomach eating gravy at Thanksgiving. You said that even writing the name made you uneasy. Well speaking MY name should be what makes you uneasy. Stepping into the ring with me SHOULD be what sparks a panic attack. Stepping into the ring with ME and CADRYN, the thought of that should be enough to kill you over once and for all. Because like I said before, it’s ME that’s been a thorn in your side since our first meeting. It’s me that now holds a victory over your head, and it’s ME that you lie awke at night and wonder if you have what it takes to defeat!

You always want to look back to that first match that we had together. That first match where you barely escaped with your title. That first match where you only won because, and these are your words bud, “Colten Kato protected you”. Well that’s fine Chris. Take it, you beat me. Kato or no Kato, you got the W. Congratulations pal, but let me flip some more of your own words back at ya right quick.

“This business isn’t about what you did before. This business is about what have you done lately”, and lately… You haven’t been able to get it done against me. Tomorrow night will be no different. Tomorrow night, you step into the ring with two men who aren’t the best in the world, but they are BOTH YOUR BETTER, and damn sure Peter’s better to boot. Tomorrow night you come face to face with two of your biggest fears Chris. Losing to me yet again, and taking one more step to becoming completely irrelevant.

And that’s exactly what WE are going to do. See, unlike you, I know that this is a team match. Both Cadryn and myself know that we have to pull our weight if we want to take them belts. You on the other hand seem to think that you can get the job done by yourself. You are blinded by your own hype and can’t even see just how big of a disadvantage ole lard ass is putting you in. Wait, I take that back, you see it, you just think that you can compensate for Peter Gilmour.

Newsflash…

YOU AREN’T THAT GOOD!

Even fucking Peter Gilmour can see the writing on the wall Chris!

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So why can’t you!?!

Because you are the most air headed son of a bitch I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting in or out of that ring.

I swear Peter went on one of the most nonsensical rants that I’ve ever heard. Full of lies and misinformation, but you CHRIS CHAOS are the one in that team that really doesn’t have a clue!”

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You needed to be protected by a general manager to BARELY escape me with your Universal Title intact back when you were at the top of your game. Then the next time we met, you fell by my hand pretty decisively. So let me ask, what makes you think that your unwashed out of shape ass stands even a chance of walking out of Warfare with your gold in tact? You’re obviously going through a crisis right now Chris. A guy shouldn’t take a woman leaving him as hard as you do. Only a psychopath would react as you have. Busting the TV? Cutting yourself? The drinking… The attempt on your own life… It’s all bullshit!

You know what they say about us psychopaths right?

Takes one to know one, and you sir definitely aren’t one!

What you are is a pathetic piece of shit who can only be referred to as a man when the term is used loosely. You want so bad to rise back to the level that you were once at, that you have resorted to making up bullshit stories about pretend women and make believe mental episodes in hopes that someone might just find you edgy and cool. Once again, you’re not. It really amazes me that a guy who hates my, what was the word that you used, gimmick?

Yeah, that’s it.

Anyway, it amazes me that a guy who claims to lothe my “gimmick” as much as you do, is trying so hard to steal it for himself. The problem is, that padded room you set up on studio 7 isn’t fooling anyone… Not one single person. Instead, we all see you for the fake ass poser that you really are.

Cadryn Tiberius
“Can I say something?”

”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
‘By all means…”

Cadryn Tiberius
“Me and Gravy aren’t a cohesive unit? PU-LEASE, we have the most cohesive units you’ve ever seen! They’re roughly the same size, and they both burn a little when we pee!”


”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
‘Dude...”


Cadryn Tiberius
“THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW GRAVY!”

”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
‘Anyway, Cadryn may be a few dimes short of a dollar over here, but where are you getting that he’s trying to be black? Check the dude out Chris.

Cowboy hat? CHECK!

Childlike mannerisms? CHECK!

Most over inflated sense of self worth this side of himself? DOUBLE CHECK!

Cadryn is the same dude he’s always been, but I get it. You’re hung up on the name. Well I’ve got a solution for that. From this point forward, we no longer want to be called Dem Niggaz.

Instead, we’re changing our name to AWESOME TIMES THREE, or…”





































The scene fades to…























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Cadryn Tiberius
“Wait, shouldn’t one of us address Peter Gilmours promo a little more in depth?”

Only to fade right back in like an after credits scene in a Marvel movie.

”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
“I’d love to man, but I just can’t make sense of a damn thing he said. I mean, when did he beat me? When did he beat you? How does he admit that he can’t even carry his own weight?”

Cadryn Tiberius
“He is pretty fat.”

”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
“Totally, but not the point. The dude admitted that he can’t carry his weight in the team. Straight up said that Chris Chaos has been carrying his ass match after match. Well I think I’ve made a good case as to why Chaos isn’t carrying his ass to victory tomorrow night, so lets just let Peter be.”

Cadryn Tiberius
“But I has fat jokes!”

”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
“Let’em go Cad, let’em go.”

Cadryn’s eyes bulge and his cheeks swell as he fights to hold in the barrage of insults.

”Dark Warrior” Micheal Graves
“Oh Chris, before I go I’d like to take a moment to point out one more thing to you. Tomorrow night when you lose, you’re undoubtedly going to desperately look for that notation, for that excuse, for that person to blame. Well I promise you, much like that fabricated story you came up with, I think that we both know where the blame falls on this one…”




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