A camera ninja falls from its place on top of the refrigerator as Azrael is seen, sitting at his dining room table. Resting on the table in front of Azrael, there is a plate, that had once contained a steak; as remnant by the leftover round bone, and an empty wine glass, slightly stained red at the bottom from what the glass once held. Azrael and the camera ninja share an awkward pause and a shifty stare. Then Azrael reaches out, grabs the bone from the plate and tosses it onto the floor. The XWF camera ninja scurries over on all fours and grabs the bone. As evident by the secondary camera ninja, that remains unseen. Trixie hobbitses... eh, camera ninjas. From there, the camera ninja that snatched up the bone; now gritted in between its pointed yet still quite mangled and severely broken teeth, scrambles back to the fridge, climbs up the refrigerator's front, perches at the top and glares. Its beady eyes glowing in the shaded space atop the fridge as it sucks the marrow from the bone. Azrael rises from his chair, brings the glass and plate to the sink, where the items are placed within it neatly and then strolls towards his living room. He swore that he could literally feel the eyes of the strange, disfigured creature burning into him and would attest to the fact that he heard a defiant and prominent hiss. Like a shriveled, misbegotten alley cat that you might hear getting into a fight with an opossum at 3AM through an opened window. Weird. The XWF really needed to do something about either upping these mongrels' salary, so they didn't have to exist like creepy, hunched over trolls forging for scraps or they seriously needed to pick a new crew. Cause these were getting a little ripe. In several ways.


Walking into the living room, Azrael decides that its better to just start talking. He knew all eyes were on him. He needed to shoot this promo. And he couldn't get rid of the... infestation, until they were satisfied with what they needed to get collected. These things were probably kept in an old garden shed or some type of crate. Where they had to live inside their own filth and were beaten with a rubber hose or some sort of severely rusted up garden tool, when they didn't serve their "purpose". Forge for rats and other vermin as their food. Maybe they were even forced to fight each other too. Imagine that. A couple of these outlandish, freak creatures going at it. To the death. Yeah. Survival of the fittest in these fights. Beyond no holds barred. You're seeing extremely demented fucks, so mentally gone that they're literally fighting to the death for basically... eternal servitude. That's right. Eternal. Servitude. There's no coming out of this. Once you're here. Living in this mangy, crooked, misshapen state and your brains are about the equivalent of moldy, rotten scrambled eggs. That's it. You end here. Final curtain call. Finito. In other words, when the XWF trucks come rolling down the street and a guy hops out saying that he's recruiting for camera ninjas. You fucking run! Don't think! Just fucking go and don't stop! Cause these men will hunt people down; if need be the case, with nets and those weird leashes that they use to catch stray and rabid animals. These motherfuckers don't play and you DO NOT want to be caught.


Anyway, on with the promo.


"Next week Wednesday, I'll be facing off against Jenny Myst and Ms. Hyde. Which is alright. I'm not biased against ladies fighting in the squared circle. Faced off against a few women in the past. Though, if they want to enter a ring with me, they need to understand that I won't hold back. It's wrestling after all and they walked into this company same as anyone else. They understood what the company represents and the x-treme nature of the business. I'm fairly certain they both signed contracts of their free accord. So they know what that means. At least, every female that I faced off against in the past did and always brought a good fight. Everything they've got. So out of respect and because I have zero qualms about hitting a lady. I do the same. Women that get into the ring with me, receive the same treatment as the men do. Plain and simple. This is strictly business though. No hard feelings given and none taken."


"I don't even mind that this is a title shot match, for the Bombshell title. Mandi Rider and I faced off in the past. She's a skilled fighter. Her promos are always entertaining and she talks a good trash talk game. That means I can expect to be enthralled. I'm absolutely fine with facing her again. Regardless, if I win or lose. This is an all around plus for me. Although, if I'm completely honest, there's a part of me that thinks it's a bit funny that I'm included for this match at all. Still, I'll play along. Fuck it. It's not a big deal. Haha! I've done far worse than holding a title meant for the ladies' division. For instance, I wrestled Peter Gilmour in a Buried Alive in Blood, Cum and Shit match. Went in. Fought. Won. Walked out. The evidence is still out there too. Heck... when I first arrived in the XWF I came out of the sewer! I've been swallowed by the Loch Ness monster and had to escape out the rear door. Alas, this evidence is gone but I'm certain that if one tried, they could see match evidence where it's pretty clear that I don't get fazed or bothered too easy. In other words, bring on this upcoming fight, a Bombshell title match and whatever happens after that, I can and will... roll with it."

"The thing that concerns me though, is the fact that they needed to include this."

Quote:That's right! Azrael is genderless and therefore eligible! Weird!

"I'm not genderless. I remember filling out the form and finally seeing - Alien, as a gender. So I checked it. Since I have an alien cock. It does a tad more than what a mere human dick can do. It can invert. Balls too. Meaning, when I'm not aroused, all the goods get stored up inside me. Nice feature. Saves me from kicks to the nuts. Even more hilarious though, I was recently in a match for Savage Saturday Night. In that match, I faced off against Erik Black. It was my return fight back in the XWF and even the transcript guy knew, that I was all male. The evidence is entirely provided within the fight; however, I'll give you a taste as well."

Azrael, snaps his fingers and a hovering video appears, with closed captioning.

Quote:The two men climb to their feet, and Azrael charges Erik Black driving several forearms into his face and forcing him across the ring into the far turnbuckle. The grim reaper sees another opportunity and sprints around the outside of the ring, well, sprints as quickly as his long robes and bony feet will let him. Azrael punches Black a few times with a closed fist, but what's the referee gonna say? Somebodies going to die here, who's worried about closed fists? Azrael sees the grim reaper coming around the corner and decides he's not finished with Erik himself, and flips up for a leg scissors takedown that sends Erik Black flying across the ring. Azrael is still in the corner as the grim reaper leaps up to the apron and takes a massive swing with his scythe, but Mr. Supernova sees it coming and ducks underneath the blade. He hits the grim reaper with a dropkick that sends him crashing to the floor, and Azrael rolls back to his feet at the same time as Erik Black and launches himself through the air with a vicious spear!


Good god! He almost broke Erik in half there!

Azrael snaps his fingers again and a poof of smoke, removes the floating, phantom projection.


"I've also been known by other names within the company as evident by the fact that, I'm referred to as Mr. Supernova. Mr. Supernova indicates, what now? Oh, that's right, I'm of the male persuasion. I've also been called, Mr. Satellite in the past. Again. Just a little research and all this could be avoided cause now, you simply look fucking . I heard a rumor that Lane doesn't wrestle anymore. Is it because he's been hit in the head, one too many times? Is he too fucked in the head to fight? Become a brain addled, dum-dum? Does he wear a helmet when he travels around? Clips his mittens, to his coat? Have a mental health aid provided for him, when he needs to go out and about? You know, the person that's there to prevent him, from stumbling and toddling out into the street."


"Cause the only thing besides that, would be that he's just scorned. Like a woman would get. Now. Hear me out. I have an explanation. It's from a time that I faced him. Before I dive into that, I have to admit that sometimes during a fight, in the heat of the moment, I might release the tip of the beast, so to speak. Not get a full on raging erection, be ready to fucking go or anything of the sort like that but blood is racing, hearts are pumping, adrenaline is high and I'm a living being that has a dick. It doesn't happen all the time but it happens. Things unearth the cave a tad bit. Well, during our fight, it happened and he copped a feel. It wasn't captured by the camera or mentioned but I know what a hand on my junk feels like and I know it wasn't my own. Soooo... anyhow, I went home after the fight. Everything seemed fine. Business as usual after that. Flash forward to now and then this happens. Curious and curiouser. Was it merely a hand slip for a move? Sure. Absolutely, it could be that. One only wonders because, I didn't have this sort of issue with anyone else prior to our match, or henceforth after."


"Now, I'm not saying with positive affirmation, that it's one of these options. Both ideas could be possible. However, something is amiss in this scenario. There's proof in the fact that we were once work acquaintances. Maybe the drug use blotted that part out in his head but all the rest of the really easy to find evidence proving that I'm not genderless, exists. In plain sight. Merely a look at one of my promos would suffice."

2x Universal Champion (First reign was less than a day though, lol. Due to Sebastian Duke cashing in his briefcase.)
2x Tag Team Champion
3x Triple Tag Team Champion
1x Television Champion
2x US Champion (Title retired during my second reign as champ.)
2x X-Treme Champion
1x Bombshell Champion
2x HMW Champion
2x SOTM