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Neville Sinclair · (01-05-2018)

Jan. 12, 1897

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Stoker now sat in his writing room with a purpose. The storm had returned, the wind was blowing the waves even higher than before. There was something incredibly romantic about sitting in a storm writing by candlelight.

But tonight he had dark things on his mind.

How would someone respond to being trapped in a castle with a dead man who wanted to kill you? The thoughts of it chilled his mind. Imagine not knowing where they would be, who they could turn into, what they wanted to do to you.
The story itself, as he wrote seemed incomplete. Simply writing about the evil he saw seemed basic. There was only so much a man could write about the evil in another’s hearts.

Maybe if I put myself in the story?

Stoker couldn’t help but think of how the most evil people he knew were in London. They were monsters of course, but people wouldn’t think of them as that. They sucked the souls out of the people they worked with, showing them very little value and killing them from the inside out. No, the real monsters were the ones with money who tore a little out of people every day.

Stoker had been ones of those monsters.

Once more, Bram’s wife entered into the room. Without saying a word, Stoker grabbed her, tore her shirt off and found himself running his hands over her newly naked body.

What kind of animal had he turned into.

He kissed up and down her body until he came to her breasts, spending a little time on each of them. Moving upwards, she writhed in passion as this had been the most sexual they had been in weeks. She threw her head back in pleasure and he noticed a long, throbbing blood vessel. Her neck… as he traced it with his tongue, he wanted to bite it. Sink his teeth in and….

That’s it!

He pushed her away almost immediately. He would be back to finish what he had started later, but for now, the inspiration had come. What if the count was seen by an Englishman, visiting him the same time. What if he bit necks and sucked blood out of his victims turning them into what he was.

It would not simply be horror, it would be social commentary on those who tried to suck the life out of those with any sense of creativity, turning them into “dead” monsters themselves seeking to do the same for others.

In a way, he felt completely justified to call out the people who had done the most damage to him. People would fear this story, both for obvious reasons and deeper meanings as well. The upper class would hate him for calling them out.
But this would be his masterpiece.

Count Dracula…
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Jan. 5, 2018

Neville had flown over the water to spend some time in Ireland before his flight to America took off. He wasn’t ever sure what to think of this country. On one hand, there was something incredibly charming about the small country and how they did things. Spending time on the seashore, drinking a pint with the locals, talking about music and boats with men much older and dumber than him was a little charming.

These people weren’t trying to be anything they weren’t, they just were products of the environment they were created in. He couldn’t look down on them for that, it was admirable, in a way. Ireland might even be a little bit charming.

It felt different than some of the parts he had been to. It was unassuming. Many of the towns along the English shore tried too hard, they felt as if their image was the main attraction bringing people there. It’s why Neville hated it, he knew what the English were and what they tried to portray themselves to be. He didn’t have time to deal with fake people and those obsessed by image.

This would be the only time he would ever admit such a thing, but he wished parts of England were a lot more like the Irish Coast.

He walked through the crypts at St. Michan’s church in Dublin. This was an area Stoker would have known as a child, he imagined this had been one of the scariest places for a child to visit growing up in Dublin. It really was incredibly eerie.

It’s interesting what image can do to us. We spend all our time trying to present ourselves a certain way, and then live in fear when we’re exposed. This area we’re in right now serves as a great example for this. It’s terrifying to be here, especially at night with the gothic architecture and old stone faces. It’s no surprise that many see this area as haunted.

But think about where we really are. We’re in a graveyard in a church. Some of the nicest, most holy men in Dublin have been buried here. Really this is a place where souls are at rest, feeling convinced about where they’ve gone in the afterlife. This isn’t a place for souls to go and haunt, it’s a place of rest.

In many ways, Mezian, you remind me of this place. You like to portray yourself with a certain kind of darkness, but really you’re completely harmless. I mean, we can see right through the crazy-ass exterior of who you are. Let me explain to you today a few things I’ve learned about real darkness, the kind that does keep me up at night.

Neville stands beside a tomb that he can’t read.

Lesson #1 – Real Monsters Can Take All Shapes and Sizes

If there’s anything I’ve learned in life it’s that real monsters don’t look like what they do in the movies. We like to portray them as psychologically unstable people, desiring to harm and kill people out of a hard motive. Think about almost every horror movie you’ve watched, most don’t stop to explain why the people or spirits do what they do. They just want to hurt people. Carnage and Chaos are what keeps them motivated and eventually they get what’s coming to them.

But here’s the problem with those kinds of monsters. We hear the stories of them and shudder, yet they don’t really exact any real change in this world. They do bad because they want to and we look at them like they are anomalies and move on with our lives. Yes, there are twisted, demented people out there. But for the most part, people are now more and more concerned with what led them there than they are scared that they are around. Everyone wants to help each other, people think of them as sad stories and they justify their actions accordingly

But think where the real darkness lies Mezian. It’s not in guys trying to give the image you are, its in those who affect an entire generation of people because of policies made and little value to human life. We are terrified about the darkness of the Nazi regime, yet what we forget to realize is that they were a political party with extremist views. We are terrified of where the world is now as we watch two leaders play chicken with nuclear weapons. The bigger problem with guns at the moment is people who can watch mass shootings and still try to justify not changing laws. This is where the real darkness in the world lies.

But you like to put yourself forward, overemphasizing the fact that you’re dark and evil. It comes off as fake, you’re the horror movie that distracts people from the atrocities really going on in this world. Real darkness looks a lot more like guys like me than guys like you.

Neville notices a tombstone with the name Sinclair on it. He feels the chill, knowing that it’s probably some kind of dead relative he never knew he had. His own mortality was something that creeped him out and he didn’t like talking about.

Lesson #2 – Everyone has a little dark in them

Understand that there’s nothing special by showing a little darkness inside. I think it’s something we all have and it’s definitely something that needs to be pointed out. You think you’re unique because you flaunt your image around this federation? You think that we really care that you might be the living embodiment of a little part of each of us? Get the fuck out.

I once listened to a talk with the high priest of the church of Satan and was surprised by what he had to say. He said that to believe in a devil, you had to believe in God. If there’s an ultimate source of good, there has to be an ultimate source of evil. Because of that, Satan’s embodiment as an ultimate had to be debated and re-thought. Even devil-worshippers don’t believe in the devil. Instead they choose to worship the darkness inside us all.

But that’s just it, whether we’re a fan favorite or someone seen as “evil” in this federation. We’re all dark, we all have evil inside of us. We couldn’t be in this type of business if we didn’t want to hurt people. We could do what did if we truly didn’t enjoy talking shit about each other. We are all a little fucking nuts and evil in ourselves. So why play that off as a gimmick?

What makes you and others like you so special that it’s what you want to be remembered for. It seems pretty bland and ordinary if you look at the big picture of things, doesn’t it?

Neville once again shudders as he’s talking about Satan in a church’s graveyard. He didn’t necessary believe in the spiritual world the way it was defined by church, but he knew there was something bigger out there. As much as he loved science, it only made sense when you could separate the rational things in life with the irrational. There had to be more out there than could be explained using physical, tangible things.

He hoped he hadn’t offended anyone/anything in saying what he was. There was always that risk here though.

Lesson #3 – There’s a large difference between Image and Reality

So it leaves us where we’re at. The fans of the XWF are looking for people whob inject reality into what they’re watching. Personalities we need to have need to reflect who we really are. It doesn’t help us to put ourselves forward as some fake-ass bullshit with a name people aren’t sure how to pronounce. This is why people don’t like you Mezian. Between you and your woman, the whole things just seems fake and overproduced.

The image of what we are doing this weekend is that it’s going to be a competitive fight. We want the fans to be excited to see us fight and that means I have to take this seriously. So I’ll play this up a bit, tomorrow night I plan on bringing you a fight and I really hope you do well with it. I’ll give you everything you can possibly handle if you step up and fight. I hope that I am impressed by you. I hope that everything I’m saying might be proven wrong by someone who steps up and gives me a hell of a fight. I need this to get better, and the XWF needs this for further pushes of the little guys like you.

But we both know what the reality of this fight is. There’s not a chance in hell you will step toe-to-toe with me. You can make all the dramatic entrances you want, but coming back from your injury, this wasn’t the place to start. This will be a momentum killer for you and I’m not sure you’ll ever get it back.

How bad do you really want this Mezian? I’ve gotta go, I’ve got a flight to catch. See you tomorrow.

Neville quickly hopped over the fence from the churchyard. He wasn’t sure what was happening, but he felt this kind of inner conflict since he’d been there. There was the good side of Neville, the one who genuinely wanted to help Mezian get better. He knew the poor guy needed it. His own humanity required that he try to help someone he sees so clearly struggling with what he was doing. But there was a dark side of things as well. Neville wanted to hurt him. Neville wanted to hurt him so bad he would never step in the ring again. Neville also wanted to embarrass him. A guy that is so clearly obsessed with image would be humiliated to lose so badly.

The good and evil conflict felt strong with Neville Sinclair, it was like that dumb-ass Star Wars movie. He’d see what would come out tomorrow night. It would probably be a strong mix of both.

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