[Well... here we go. But wait, I hear you say?! MR WS... booked for an event, and about to drop some sick promo for the aforementioned event?

I'm sorry... I'm sorry to you all for that, you deserve better from me. I could've been in audiobooks... but the powers that be wouldn't allow it. Instead I'm stuck here in this reasonable job. Narrating promotional videos, but damnit if I won't be the most awe inspiring narrator you ever saw. I just wanted to be cool, I wanted to be hip, like the narrator for Tommy Wish. Using profanity in his words, like it's no biggie. No! I have potential future sponsors, and a reference to think about.

Sure I'll ridicule MR WS, but that's to be expected, the man is clearly still hanging onto his only major achievement in this business which was being, for all intensive purposes the IDIOT title. An ironic title, that no man wanted but that WS seemed to wear like a medal of honour (English, and thus correct spelling, I don't care what Ring you compete in). This guy is asking for it on a plate. But me... I have dreams... ambitions... I want to make it]

It's the International Division Impact Only Title you moron. It was leather and gold, it was a title. The fact is was exclusive to Impact, the former show before Saturdays became so Savage is irrelevant. It was a title, and it covered the entire International Division, you know what International is? It's GLOBAL my friend, GLO....BAL You're resume will speak for itself when people see you narrate for a former Global champion, and hell I'll say it... a FUTURE... UNIVERSAL CHAMPION.

[I mean, I find that almost impossible to believe... but whatever you say]

Just do your damn job, and introduce the scene and setting so people know where the devil I am and let me take over. There's words that need saying, and I'm the one to say them. There's a man, who's just realised he's getting the title of IDIOT Father Title, he doesn't have time for this, he's fiddling with knobs.

[So... where are we?]

Will you just look around, and say what you see? This doesn't need to take this long. There's word... I mean time limits to consider man. You've damn near wasted just under a quarter of this talking about your hopes and dreams. That nobody cares about, this isn't an agency for voiceover artists that only exist in my head. This is a damn promotional video from MR WS, aimed at some people whom I am going to be wrestling with in a couple of days. Next thing you know it'll be Sunday morning, I'll be sitting here with my ass whooped, but oh.. at least we all know that you've got dreams you'll never achieve.

[Wow... ok. You want me to say what I see? Omnipresent in this world where my crowning achievement is narrating an IDIOT Champion?

Ok...

I see darkness]

Oh for crying out loud...

[I tell you, I SEE DARKNESS! The world is black, there is nothing to see here. A completely black room, with only one large light shining straight into your envious little eyes. Just because I've decided to be kind and let this XWF Universe see your ugly little face, so go for it. You have no setting, there's no Steve Sayors to interview you, there's no shenanigans that usually occur although people wouldn't know that because you've been "back" nearly a month and no ones heard a damn thing from you since you signed that contract. So go ahead MR WS, tell us. Give us the "Sharp Factor". I'm going home...]

You know what, forget it. I'll dominate this enclosed dark environment that you've reduced me too. Because there's only words to be said. And if you're 'omnipresent' then you're always home, and you're always out so take that!

The fact is, I've been waiting all week for something to happen. I've been waiting to be berated by my opponents, but so far all that waiting in hope has been nothing more than a broken wish upon a star. So it's time for me to get involved with all of this.

Let's go for it, let's start with the only other man who's shown their face this week. Tommy Wish... Man you don't know me? Guess what, by default that means I equally don't know or care about you. You seem to be real busy, you got those little knobs your fiddling with "and shit", you got some broad up the duff, and you're talking about how I'm going to experience what "AN" rusty in ring competitor feels like. Well bully for me, because you seem to be "AN" rusty speaker of the English language. All I can say about that, if you're already conceding to being rusty, you're already admitting to that, you're already conceding the match and making excuses. I don't blame you honestly, if you've got that much going on outside of the ring AND you're rusty? Let me tell you about rust... it disintegrates from water and oxygen... and brother, you're body is around 57-60% water, and you're breathing Gods great oxygen. That means you're going only one way, down. I know how "AN" rusty in ring competitor feels, rough round the edges but easily broken in half by the strength of one hand. That's exactly where you're going. And hey, while I'm attacking your ability to speak the English language, why don't I question you're mathematics too. You say you're facing 2 of us this weekend? Brother, it's a Fatal FOUR Way, I understand the confusion hell I'm thinking I'm wrestling myself when I look at the jobbers I'm being squared up against.

That brings me to you Calypso, I can tell you my return may not have gone to plan but I'll take that over the last couple of weeks you've had. You walked into Leap of Faith the Federweight Champion... and then what happens? You piss yourself in the middle of the ring and get yourself eliminated quicker than the time it took you to walk down that ramp in the first place. Then, in what I can only describe as an attempt to regain some credibility you roll into Savage last week and get the W over a lady. Now this isn't a slight on Jenny Myst, I don't want to get into the whole sexist regime. What I'll say is, you dared to underestimate her and she took you to town. It was a W, but a convincing win? Hell I'm so unconvinced by you, that I'm 100% convinced that the only W you'll be coming across will be MR WS' left arm wrapped tightly round your neck and sending your head crashing into the canvas.

As for Joshua Reno, I don't even know what to make of you. The "Basic Bitch Doctor"? Look, let me make it real basic bitch. Doctor, doctor... the clinic is open. I got 2 other schmucks here who've been beaten within an inch of their lives, and if that's not enough for you take a look in the mirror. Because you're on the verge of contracting a nice couple of black eyes and a partridge in a pear tree. We don't know each other right now, but I assure you come Saturday night you will. Because MR WS will be the guy who ended your XWF career, and Joshua Reno will be my simplistic basic bitch. Straight up.

I've ranted enough on you 3 jabronis, I'm no wasting anymore energy right now I'm going to save it all up and get straight up savage with y'all. I realise this is out of character and off topic, I'm usually happy go lucky. But I will repent my performance at Leap of Faith, and I am taking no prisoners and boys... that is one thing, and one thing only...

Unlucky... For.... You. Now cut this camera.

[Wow... erm.... well being as I am omnipresent, of course I couldn't leave. So I'll round this all up by saying... Fade to Black]