We come upon the beautiful shores of Monterey, CA. There is an ever so slight breeze - but you can hardly notice it with the sun beating down on you. A heat wave has moved through the state, creating record temperatures. A sign of things to come? Or just the appearance of this man on the horizion:


There he is. We see The Big Kahuna rise from the water, like a mythological adonis-like creature from the depths. His smile doesn't break as he speaks to you.

The Big Kahuna: Welcome!

Kahuna breaks into a jog as he runs towards a large house on a small cliff nearby.

Kahuna: Come! We haven't had the chance yet!

We catch up with Kahuna, entering the small mansion.

Kahuna: It's been so great to meet everyone. I know you all haven't had the chance to welcome me in yet. I haven't been keeping up here with my mail, I'm sure there are so many thank you cards already - but it's been so long since I've been home. But while I'm here, welcome! Please, come in, check it out, we need a proper introduction.

The Monterey home of Kahuna opens into a living room accompanied by a study area. There sits a short, curly haired man at a large desk. He is working on some advertising contracts for Kahuna. He looks up and sees you. Kahuna motions towards him to come here. The man looks hesitant to meet you.


Man: Oh I don't...Oh I don't get into Kahuna's affairs personally like this, I'm a behind the scenes guy, but yes, hi, welcome.

Kahuna: This man...

Kahuna chuckles as he pats the man on the shoulders a few times, increasing in strength with each pat.

Kahuna: My attorney. My accountant. It wouldn't be an introduction in any house of mine not to stop by and see this man...Dustin Diamondberg!

Dustin: Thank you Kahuna, that's swell, very kind. Very nice. Okay, back to the numbers, thank you. Nice to see you, have a good one.

Kahuna laughs as Dustin makes a quick dash back to his desk, again working on some legal paperwork.

Kahuna: Let's skip the upstairs for now and head straight back.

Kahuna motions to the backyard. A step away from opening a set of french double doors, Kahuna turns around and shouts back to Dustin.

Kahuna: What's the word on Saturday? I need to get sized for the referee shirt and that takes 4 days, I need to know now.

Dustin barely looks up, staring blankly at the desk for a moment before answering.

Dustin: Kahuna...I...Not in front of...

Kahuna: D...Come on my man, give it to me straight.

Dustin: I don't think that's happening. It's...a woman's championship title. And not only that but you have no connection to either wrestler. And no referee training.

Kahuna: Oh please, training, I'm a damned wrestler. I've been training since I could crawl, get out of here with training.

Dustin: And I received a letter today...

Dustin shuffles through a seperate pile of papers on his desk, to the top right. He finds the one he's looking for.

Dustin: You're claiming - in public - to have now slept with these women as well? I thought we talked about libel?

Kahuna: Oh those were absolutely just nasty rumors after the show this past weekend, you know I don't confirm those! Plus, I thought it was slander. Oh what the hell, you're a lawyer, do something! You're getting the checks, right?

Dustin folds the letter back and slowly and sheepishly backs down. It's a bit awkward now, like after seeing your parents fight for the first time.

Kahuna: I put it out there, okay! They'd be lucky to have me ref a minute of that match! Okay?...Now...To the backyard!

You move through the doors into the backyard. It backs up against the small cliff, the edge of the cliff containing a bean shaped swimming pool. As you walk along a small cement pathway towards the pool, for a moment, all you can hear is the ocean tide. And then you hear a quick burst of water. You're jarred back to reality, but don't see Kahuna in front of you anymore. You look behind you. Kahuna has turned on a pool-side shower, to wash off the salt water. He looks up and meets your gaze.


Kahuna: Haha! It's alright, everyone does it!

Kahuna turns off the shower, grabbing a white towel from a nearby rack. He slowly walks up beside you, turning to his magnificent ocean view.

Kahuna: I have to come here at least once a month. A lot of people talk about getting away from it all, but that's missing the point.

You don't get away from it. You go to it. So this is my go to place.

I've had to be here a lot lately. When I first began contemplating my return to professional wrestling, I came here. I had to shut out the noise.They kept telling me, they'd say, "Kahuna - You have it all big guy. You have years of fighting accolades in boxing, wrestling, and mixed-martial arts. You have the money. The looks! And you still have your youth! Why go back? Why risk it all?"

In this spot right here...I made the decision to sign with the XWF.


Kahuna looks away from you, now gazing across the falling ocean tides. He looks in contemplation, yet he still has that stupid grin on his face.

Kahuna: This is the spot where I realized it. Where I had "that moment". All of my training, all of the prior butt-whoopings I had given, all of the titles I had won...They were all preparing me for the final chapter....a new chapter...In the XWF.

It's about time I got back into the ring. And it's about time the XWF had themselves a wrestler worthy of the name. A wrestler that wasn't consumed by the grotesque in life. Because really, if we're being honest --The XWF is a glorified loony bin with some of these wrestlers on the roster!

It's a match made in heaven. The XWF gets a world-class wrestler on their books and I get to have fun taking out the trash.

Those freaks are just a side dish though. Kicking their asses is only the beginning for my plans in the XWF. You don't come out of retirement -- and put this body on the line -- unless you've put a bullseye on the backs of the very best the XWF has to offer.

There's a long line. And it will be a difficult climb to the top. But I'm coming...for the Universe....

The Big Kahuna breathes in one last look at the ocean before turning around abruptly. He walks past you back into the house, now calling back to you.

Kahuna: Now...the bedrooms!...