The scene opens out in the parking lot. We see Micheal Graves stepping out of a old rust covered white van. Micheal throws a large duffle bag over his shoulder and starts walking down the long corridor to get into the arena.
Micheal Graves is in the arena tonight, but what does he have in that bag Huey?
How am I supposed to know?
Well whatever it is, we all know that it can’t be good!
Kimberly Anderson
- vs -
Rosalina
No Word Limit
Standard Rules |
The following contest is scheduled for one fall;
Introducing first, Hailing from beyond the stars in the midnight sky, LADY ROSALIIIIINAAAAAAAA!!!!!
as the arena goes dark bright lights flash like stars and one pyro shoots across to the stage as if it were a shooting star and explodes into a sparkling shower. as the beat to the song Independent by Webbie begins and has the crowd cheering and clapping to the beat and spelling out I N D E P E N D E N T and chanting do you know what that mean? in a chant She then slowly descends from the rafters in Front of the X-Tron during it to the stage her music playing her to the ring and with her wand which she waves overhead she causes the ring posts to light with fireworks.
And her opponent, hailing from Toronto Ontario, Canada, KIMBERLY ANDERSOOOOON!!!!!!
Kimberly slowly walks out as the lights in the area dim. With a determined look painted across her face, she looks to the left and right of the stage, absorbing the moderately positive reaction that she is receiving from the crowd. Kim pumps her fist in the air a few times, trying to rally the crowd behind her. It works to some effect as the crowd comes to life a bit. Kim then turns her attention to Lady Rosalina and charges down the ramp towards the ring.
Judging by the no nonsense look on Kimberly Anderson’s face, Lady Rosalina may be about to learn that the time for fun and games is over!
Kimberly picks up speed and slides into the ring on her belly. She quickly sits up on her knees and looks out to the crowd, nodding her head with the beat of the music.
Mario and his crew have already made it clear that they aren’t here to place games JR. I’d be willing to wager that if anyone here is about to learn a lesson, it’s going to be the newcomer, Kim Anderson.
Oh yeah, and what lesson might that be?
A lesson in humility JR!
DING DING DING!
Rosalina and Kimberly go into the collar and elbow tie up to start the match. Kimberly with an arm-drag takedown for aand a quick cover.
One!
But Lady Rosalina kicks out at the one count. The two women size each other up, and once again lock up. Kimberly gains the advantage and dumps Lady Rosalina over the top rope, but Rosalina grabs hold of Kimberly’s hair and drags her over the top rope with her. Both women battle back and forth on the outside. Rosalina gains the advantage by tossing Kim into the ringpost. Rosalina then slides back into the ring, looking to gain the victory via countout, but Kim manages to get back into the ring at the count of nine. Rosalina applies a wristlock. Kimberly with a roll through and lands a deep arm-drag. Kimberly transitions into an armbar. Rosalina manages to hold her grip, never allowing Kimberly to try for the submission. Rosalina goes for the SuperNova, but Kim holds onto the top rope. Rosalina tosses Kimberly to the outside. Rosalina tells Kimberly to get back into the ring as Kim is regaining her composure. Kim climbs up to the apron. Rosalina with a Springboard Sidekick that knocks Kimberly off the ring-apron. Lady Rosalina then dives off the ring-apron with a springboard moonsault. Rosalina rolls Kimberly back into the ring.
This match is proving to be a barn burner Huey!
Barn burner? Who talks like that!?!
Kimberly kicks Rosalina in the chest. Kim then plants Rosalina with a inverted DDT and tries to pin.
One!
Two!
KICKOUT!
Kimberly starts working on the arm of Rosalina. Kimberly drives her knee into Rosalina’s should and tries to hyperextend the arm. Rosalina cries out in pain and Kimberly wrenches back. Kimberly seems to get bored with the move and releases the arm. She stands up and slaps Rosalina in the back of the head a few times, taunting her. Rosalina looks pissed as she starts to get up. Kimberly with a snap-mare into a wrist lock. Rosalina tries to rally the crowd behind her. She fights her way to her feet and kicks Kim in the midsection to break the wristlock. Rosalina with a running axe-handle that causes Kim to stumble back. Rosalina follows up a series of punches and ends the assault with a beautiful dropkick. Rosalina climbs to the top rope and connects with a five star frog splash for the pin!
One!
Two!
Kickout!
The two women get back up to their feet. Kimberly drops Rosalina with a belly to belly suplex. Kimberly ascends to the top rope. Kimberly with a big elbow drop and a pin.
One!
Two!
Rosalina kicks out!
Kimberly seems frustrated. She pulls Rosalina to her feet and screams in her face. Kim then slaps the taste out of Rosalina’s mouth and hits the ropes, connecting with a missile dropkick on the rebound! Kimberly then goes for Full nelson facebuster, but Rosalina manages to slip out. Kimberly surprises her with a Silent Kiss followed by a cover attempt!
By God, that move may have just ended this!
Kimberly goes for the cover, but Rosalina has her foot under the bottom rope. Kimberly drags her in the middle and goes for the cover again.
One!
Two!
KICKOUT!
Kimberly, yells out in frustration and grabs Rosalina by the hair, tugging her up to her feet. Kimberly goes for a second Silent Kiss and nails it...
One!
Two!
THREE!!!
As the referee raises Anderson's hand in victory, an eerie sound reverberates throughout the arena, the sound of a horn. Just then, the whole arena goes black.
Folks, I'm not entirely sure what's going on here. Technical glitch?
Finally, the lights come back on.
There we go.
Wait, what the hell is that?!
Some of the people in the crowd start to notice it now too. Some look confused, others put their hands to their mouths with disgust or avert their gaze.
The referee and Kim Anderson are still standing in the middle of the ring. Something lands on Anderson's head. It draws her gaze up just in time for her to catch another drip to the face. Anderson wipes it away with a degree of disgust and looks up again. Finally, her eyes adjust to the bright arena lights long enough for her to realize what is dripping on her.
A pig is hanging suspended from the rafters. It's throat is slit and the blood is running down it's face and dripping into the enter of the ring. Anderson and the ref scatter to avoid catching any more of the blood, both of them looking more than a bit disturbed at this development.
Good God, what's the meaning of that?!
I don't know JR, but it's creepy as hell. Where's security?!
Hopefully someone can get to the bottom of this disgusting spectacle!
The dead pig continues to sway ever so slightly, dribbling it's life's blood onto the canvas below before somebody smartens up enough to put a bucket underneath it.
Paul Catchall
- vs -
Chris Valerius
- vs -
Isabella Ravenwolf
2500 Word Limit
Xtreme Rules Triple Threat |
The following contest is a triple threat match, and it is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Salem, Massachusetts, ISABELLA RAVENWOOOOOOLF!!!!
O' Death begin to play over the P.A.The lights go out in the area and all is silent for a few moments before three lighting bolts strike the top of the ramp. Soon afterwards the lights turn back on and there is sitting on top of a large black horse, with eyes red as blood. The horse begins to makes it way down the ramp and soon reaches the ring. Isabella hops off. She pets her mighty Shire before releasing him of his duties. The horse runs off busting into flames and disappears into smoke. Isabella gets into the ring and waits for the match to start.
And her first opponent, from Misery Bay, Michigan, PAUL CATCHAAAAALLLLLL!!!
Ain't No Sunshine starts to play over the arena loudspeakers. A man makes his way onto the stage wearing a black hoodie and his wrestling gear. Avoiding eye contact with any of the fans, he starts the slow walk to the ring. He pauses halfway down the ramp, and looks up. Head shaking.
WAIT, WAIT, WATCH OUT!!!
Suddenly Cris Valerius comes rushing down the ramp and clubs Paul Catchall with a forearm! Catchall stumbles forward, losing his balance and rolling down the ramp. Chris Valerius jumps on top of him and unleashes a flurry of punches to keep him down.
What is he doing, this match hasn’t even started yet!
He’s playing it smart Jr! If he takes Paul Catchall out of this match now, then he only needs to worry about Isabella!
Mika Hunt is yelling for Chris to stop attacking Paul Catchall. Chris ignores her and drags Paul to his feet. He then whips Catchall into the steel steps. Catchall hits them knee first and flips over them with some impressive ragdoll effects. Chris Valerius grabs the steps and stands over Catchall who is holding his knee in pain. Chris brings the steps down over the already injured knee of Paul Catchall!
This is out of hand Huey! Chris Valerius is trying to end Paul Catchall’s career![white]
You know what they say JR, all’s fair in love and war!
Valerius tosses the steps to the side as EMTs rush down to check on Paul Catchall. Valerius rolls into the ring and turns his attention to a seemingly bored Isabella Ravenwolf.
Ding Ding Ding!
Hunt calls for the bell, and Valerius rushes towards Ravenwolf, catching her off guard with a powerful axe kick!
[white]Oh my, Isabella didn’t see that coming at all!
It looks like she is out cold JR!
Valerius paces around the ring with a wild look in his eyes and a twisted smile on his face. Valerius grabs Isabella and hits Thoughtcrime in the center of the ring.
That Death Valley Driver from Chris Valerius just sealed the deal! This match is over!
Chris uses his foot to roll Izzy over to her belly. He then leans down and grabs both of her arms. He looks around the arena with the same twisted smile as before. He then places his boot on the back of her head and stomps her face down into the mat! Chris continues to pull Izzy up and curb stomp her into the mat.
Come on, this isn’t necessary, you’ve already won the match. Just pin her and get it over with!
Mika Hunt calls for the bell and tells Chris to release the hold, but he ignores her and continues stomping Izzy into oblivion. Mika grabs Chris by the arm and forcefully pulls him off of Isabella. Chris throws his hands up as a sign of submission as Mika yells at him for not listening to her instructions the first time. Mika then walks over and converses with Tig O’Bitties.
Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner of this match by way of TKO, CHRIIISSSS VALERIUS!
Mika grabs Chris’s arm to raise it, but Chris pulls his arm away from her and gets in her face like they are about to fight. Mika isn’t intimidated though. She warns Chris not to try anything. Chris responds by spitting in Mika’s face and pie facing her to the ground. Chris then backs out of the ring laughing as Mika lays on the mat overselling the shove.
What is wrong with this man? Why attack Mika Hunt?
Well, she shouldn’t have gotten in his way JR!
Chris hops over the barricade and disappears into the crowd.
Darren Zirado
- vs -
Jean Baptiste Le'Croix
2500 Word Limit
Standard Rules |
The following contest is scheduled for one fall;
Introducing first, Hailing from West by God Virginia, DARREN ZIRRRRRRRRRADOOOOO!!!!
Darren walks down the ramp, all smiles and high fiving fans on his way. Darren walks up the ring steps and climbs into the ring. He holds his arms up in a victorious pose, you get the impression that he’s just happy to be here.
And her opponent, hailing from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada, JEAN BAPTISTE LE’CROOOOOOOIX!!!!!!
No pyro, no fancy lights. The 7’2 giant walking down to the ring is an intimidating sight all on it’s on. Le’Croix climbs into the ring by stepping over the top rope.
I don’t know what Darren Zirado was thinking when he accepted this match with Jean Baptiste Le’Croix.
Zirado won his last match JR, he now has faith in his abilities, but Le’Croix is here to prove that just because you believe in something, that doesn’t make it real!
DING DING DING!
Zirado and Le’Croix start with the collar and elbow tie up. Le’Croix backs Zirado into the ropes. Le’Croix crashes an open palm slap down on Zirado’s chest, making a loud pop throughout the arena. Le’Croix drops Zirado with a shoulder shoulder block. Zirado rolls out of the ring to collect himself. Le’Croix paces around the ring laughing at Zirado. Zirado slides back in and catches Le’Croix with a right hand to the jaw. Le’Croix reacts by grabbing Zirado by the head and delivering a huge headbutt that drops him to the mat. Le’Croix pulls him back up and proceeds to whip him into the ropes so hard that Zirado flies over the ropes and crashes into the barricade outside.
Would you look at the power of Jean Baptiste Le’Croix! How can Darren Zirado stand up to that!?
I don’t think he can JR, hence why he’s laying down on the job right now!
Le’Croix rolls out of the ring and scoops up Zirado. Le’Croix laughs as he bounces Zirado on the announcer table face first. Le’Croix rolls Zirado into the ring. Le’Croix rolls in and pulls Zirado back to his feet. Le’Croix whips Zirado back first into the turnbuckle. Le’Croix rushes in with a clothesline, but Zirado manages to move out of the way just in the nick of time. Le’Croix stumbles back out of the corner, and Zirado connects with a dropkick to the knee that send Le’Croix crashing to the mat!
Zirado has taken the big man off of his feet!
Zirado moves in close, but Le’Croix sits up and grabs Zirado by the throat! Le’Croix climbs to his feet with a wild mad look in his eyes. Zirado breaks the grip and fires off with three big right hands that momentarily stun Le’Croix, but not for long as Le’Croix fires back with a big right hand of his own! Zirado is rocked hard and stumbles back. Zirado regains his wits and charges in, throwing another big right of his own! Le’Croix stumbles a bit, then fires off another big right hand that sends Zirado stumbling back into the ropes! Zirado rebounds and hits a huge clothesline, but it doesn’t take Le’Croix off of his feet. Zirado decides to try again, and rebounds off the ropes with another powerful clothesline, but Le’Croix once again manages to stay vertical. Zirado goes to the well once more, and rebounds with yet another clothesline, but before it can connect, Le’Croix lands a big uppercut that seems to have Zirado out on his feet. Le’Croix follows that up with a Big Boot followed up by a leg drop! Le’Croix covers Zirado!
One!
Two!
ZIRADO KICKED OUT!!!
That was pure luck JR! There’s no way Darren Zirado has anything left in the tank!
Zirado fights his way back to his feet and regains momentum with a scoop powerslam that displays his superior strength. Zirado kicks Le’Croix in the chest. Zirado goes for the Zirado Bomb, but Le’Croix blocks it. Zirado goes for the Discus Clothesline, but Le’Croix counters with a Full Nelson Slam and a pin attempt!
One!
Two!
Kickout!
Zirado kicked out again! I can’t beleive the heart that he is showing in this match!
Heart? More like stupidity! Would you keep getting up if you were getting beaten like this JR?
Le’Croix plants Zirado with a Choke slam. Le’Croix goes for the cover.
One!
Two!
ZIRADO MANAGED TO GET HIS FOOT ON THE BOTTOM ROPE!
THIS GUY IS AN IDIOT! STAY DOWN YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH!
The man is fighting with everything that he’s got, and you’re going to call him stupid huey?
You’re Goddamn right I am JR! The guy is a moron, he doesn’t stand a snowball's chance in Hell at winning, but he continues to kick out! Jim Caedus said it best, BIG DUMB GODDAMN DARREN ZIRADO!
Le’Croix goes for the chokeslam again, but Zirado blocks it. Zirado with a thrust kick to the midsection of Le’Croix. Zirado connects with the Zirado Bomb! And follows through win the pin attempt.
One!
Two!
Three!
Oh my God, he did it! Darren Zirado with his second win in a row!
Oh great, so what’s that make him, 2 and 4000?
James Raven
- vs -
Cadryn Tiberius
2500 Word Limit
Standard Rules |
Tig O’Bitties: The following contest is a singles match scheduled for one fall!
Tig O’Bitties: Coming to the ring at this time, hailing from Toronto, Ontario, Canada, JAMES RAVEN!!!!!!!
The entire arena slowly fades to black as the audience excitedly awaits the entrance of "The Peoples GOAT". The drum beat and guitar solo start and a series of white and blue spotlights come up and pan the crowd. Mike Shinodas voice is heard on the speakers singing.
“Now here we go for the hundredth time, hand grenade pins in every line, throw ‘em up and let something shine, going out of my fucking mind… filthy mouth, no excuse, find a new place to hang this noose, string me up from atop these roofs, high and tight so I wont get loose.”
By now the fans are going wild and cheering as the spotlights slowly make their way to the top of the entrance ramp where a dim fog begins to form.
“Truth is you can stop and stare, rub myself out and no one cares, dug the trench out and lay down there with a shovel up, out of reach somewhere… yeah, someone pouring in, make it a dirt glass floor again, say your prayers and stomp it out when they bring that chorus in.”
The spotlights come together as one, and the fog fills the top of the ramp until the downbeat hits and a major blue and silver pyrotechnic display goes off and the rest of the arena lights turn up to full. When the smoke clears James Raven is seen on top of the ramp, his hands thrown up over his head and a huge smile on his face.
“I BLEED IT OUT!!! Diggin’ deeper just to throw it away, I BLEED IT OUT!!!”
James makes his way down the ramp, high fiving fans and posing for pictures with several of them until he reaches the base of the ramp. Then, he pauses for a few seconds and sprints for the ring, diving in under the bottom rope and sliding in to the center of the mat on his hands and knees. He poses for a second, then gets up and runs for the turnbuckle, climbing up and posing yet again for the fans before doing a 360 degree spin off and doing the same on the opposite turnbuckle. As his music fades out he stretches in his corner, and then waits for his opponent.
Tig O'Bitties: And his opponent, hailing from Morgantown West Virginia. CADRYN TIBERIUS!!!!
The overhead lights in the arena go dim as strobe lights begin to flash in rhythm to the sound of thunder crashing in the distance. The crowd goes wild as the fog rolls thickly from the top of the ramp as Cadryn Tiberius slowly makes his way out of the back. He stands tall in the midst of the fog as a storm rumbles behind him. Cadryn begins walking down the ramp, slapping the hands of fans on the way down. Cadryn climbs the apron and enters the ring, pausing for a moment in the middle before tossing his white Stetson cowboy hat into the crowd.
The bell rings and both men begin to circle. Raven is the bigger and perhaps faster man but Cadryn is no joke. Both men gain space before diving into a collar and elbow tie up. Both men struggle against each other before Raven feels a weakness. He slips an arm and flows beautifully into an armdrag that sends Cadryn flying. Cadryn lands gracefully rolling to his feet and charges back in. Raven fients a leapfrog making Cadryn change his pace and Raven catches Tiberius with yet another armdrag, this one of the Japanese variety. Cadryn again rolls through showing a bit of frustration now. Cadryn stands and moves slowly towards Raven. Cadryn attempts to flow into another collar and elbow tie up but Raven ducks it sliding around Cadryn grabbing The Italian Cowboy with a rear waist lock. Only for a moment before Raven releases the hold around the waist and locks on a headlock. Raven spreads his legs and pops his hips effortlessly planting Cadryn with a picture perfect headlock takeover.
Jim Ross: James Raven is putting on a clinic.
Huey D Louie: It's boring
Cadryn squirms getting his feet below him he rolls Raven onto his back for a pin.
1
Kickout
Raven is forced to release the headlock during the kick out. Raven rolls smoothly to his feet. Cadryn scrambles to his own. Raven moves in for a double leg and Cadryn scrambles away. Not pretty but it works. Raven smiles and starts to throw a punch, Cadryn raises his hands and Raven dives in for a beautiful double leg ta...
UPPERCUT.
Picture perfect uppercut from Cadryn and it appears to of stiffed Raven. Raven drops directly to his face his arms limp at his side. Cadryn rushes over and attempts the pin.
One!
Two!
ThrKICKOUT
Jim Ross: BAGAWD Cadryn almost ended this with one punch
Huery D Louie: That fancy headlock didn't head James very far did it?
Cadryn sits up obviously frustrated. He felt the way that punch landed and he knows what a knockout feels like. That felt like a knockout. Raven sits up still dazed Cadryn stands and looks at the seated James Raven. Cadryn runs hitting the ropes. Cadryn attempts a running soccer style kick but Raven lays flat on his back and the kick flies by. Cadryn continues on and hits the ropes. Raven nips up but needs a second to steady himself as the world spins around him. He turns around to see a bull rushing cowboy Raven just manages to duck the massive clothesline. Well duck might be the wrong word. Raven lost his balance and dropped to his ass.
Jim Ross: Oh no, Raven might be hurt here.
Cadryn stops looking over his shoulder and the living legend obviously on dream street and hits the ropes again. He charges back once again trying a kick. Raven doesn't move but catches the leg and rolls backwards into a beautiful rolling single leg crab. Raven squats down really putting on the pressure. Cadryn inches his way to the ropes reaching out.
Jim Ross: He's almost there!
Cadryn stretches his finger inches away! Raven releases the leg turning and dragging Cadryn back to the center of the ring. Cadryn rolls over and plants a boot firmly in Raven's mush sending him reeling back into the turnbuckle. Cadryn stands and charges Cadryn pulls his arm back for a clothesline and Raven covers up. Cadryn stops in his tracks, Raven drops his hands confused. Cadryn grabs Raven quickly in a headlock pops his hips and hits a picture perfect headlock takeover of his own. Raven squirms out grabbing a wrist lock. Cadryn spins wildly, releasing the pressure and applying a wrist lock of his own. Raven attempts a forward roll but Cadryn rolls right with him!
Jim Ross: Cadryn has a technical trick or two as well!
Raven again tries a forward roll and once again Cadryn rolls with him. Both men gracefully stand and Raven absolutely levels Cadryn with a punch forcing Cadryn to release the hold.
Huey D Louie: Just as effective as any of that fancy wrestling stuff!
Cadryn stumbles but does not fall. He looks back at Raven with a smile before throwing a haymaker right of his own that lands. Raven stumbles but also doesn't fall. Raven smirks at Cadryn and shrugs before diving grabbing Cadryns head and throwing rights like crazy. Cadryn doesn't want to let Raven dance alone so he does the same laying into Raven with a barrage of right hands as well. The crowd comes to their feet as these two men lay into each other. Both men land exceptional shots and stumble back. Cadryn falls into the corner breathing heavily. Raven drops to a knee, his shoulders rising and falling with deep breaths. Raven looks up at Cadryn. Cadryn stares down at the living legend. Cadryn stands up out of the corner strutting a few steps toward Raven. Cadryn raises both hands
“Bring it”
James Raven charges. Raven dives into a collar and elbow lockup using his slight size advantage to push Cadryn back into the turnbuckle. Raven breaks the lock up immediately and chops the holy fuck out of Cadryn. Cadryn grabs his chest but catches a stiff right hand to the jaw courtesy of James Raven. The shot rocks Cadryn but not enough to allow the left that followed close behind it. Cadryn ducks the second punch, Raven spins with the momentum and Cadryn grabs a quick waist lock. Cadryn tries to throw a quick German into the turnbuckle but Raven grapevines the leg. Cadryn's response? He releases the waist lock and punches Raven square in the back of the head.
Jim Ross: Not exactly a technical maneuver but effective!
Huey D. Louie: He donkey punched him Jim. He fucking donkey punched him!
Jim Ross: I have no idea what that is Huey.
Huey D. Louie: It's when you're getting a girl from behind and...
Jim Ross: Back to the action.
The punch rocks Raven who stumbles forward. Raven gathers himself gaining a little space. He turns around to see Cadryn charging in with a clothesline. Raven ducks and Cadryn sprints into the ropes. Raven drops down to his stomach attempting to trip up the italian cowboy but Cadryn leaps over him without losing speed. Raven pops to his feet turning and leaping into the area with a leap frog but Cadryn cacthed him out of mid air! Cadryn spins in one smooth motion before planting the living legend James Raven with a spine buster that would make Arn Anderson nod with approval. Cadryn attempts a cover.
1
2
Kickout
Jim Ross: Helluva spinebuster but it's gonna take more than that to put away James Raven.
Huey: More about this donkey punch Jim...
Raven shoves Cadryn off of him sprawling away from Tiberius, an educated eye would appreciate Raven's form as he shrimps away. His Jiu Jitsu is background showing. Cadryn has no choice but to stand and allow Raven to do the same. Cadryn throws a right hand but Raven ducks it. Cadryn throws a left quickly behind it but Raven leans ducks it to. Cadryn pulls back to throw another right and Raven ducks a bit too early
ANOTHER MASSIVE UPPPERCU...
NO Raven dodges it and as Cadryn hand flies up Raven leaps catching it wrapping his legs into a picture perfect TRIANGLE CHOKE
Jim Ross: What a beautiful transition! He's got that triangle in deep!
Cadryn struggles for a moment but the lights appear to be dimming. Cadryn looks down at the GOAT as the lights begin to fade. Cadryn gets his feet underneath him and pushes but it's too late. The lights go out as Cadryn goes limp. The ref rushing in grabbing Cadryn's arm he lifts it
Once...
Twice......
Thre...NO!
Cadryn gets his feet under neath him and flips over pinning Raven's shoulders to the apron.
1
2
KICKOUT
Raven is forced to release the hold to kick out and stands. Cadryn rolls toward the ropes attempting to catch his breath. Raven sprints after him leaping and nailing Cadryn with a low drop kick that sends Cadryn flying through the ropes and to the floor. Raven looks down at Cadryn laying on the floor before sprinting to the opposite ropes. Cadryn stands holding his back. Raven dives between the middle and top rope for a beautiful
UPPERCUT.
Cadryn caught Raven out of midair with a leaping right uppercut. Raven stops in midlfight falling to the floor. Cadryn screams clutching his hand falling back against the barricade. Raven barely moves on the floor trying to claw his way up the apron but he's on autopilot.
Jim Ross: Cadryn may of broken his hand!
Huey: That's your concern? Raven is dead!
The ref begins his count.
1
2
3
4
Cadryn holds his right hand in front of his chest and looks into the ring. Raven doesn't appear anywhere close to being able to make the count.
Huey: Get in the ring Cadryn, leave his old ass there!
Cadryn walks over grabbing a handful of Raven's hair attempting to drag him to his feet.
5
Jim Ross: He wants to win it in the ring!
6
Cadryn struggles lifting Raven with only one hand but he manages. He lifts him onto the apron.
7
Raven is laying on the apron Cadryn is trying to roll him under the bottom rope. Raven comes to life grabbing Cadryn's injured hand. Cadryn screams in pain and then catches an elbow to the mouth. Cadryn stumbles back rocked falling into the barricade. Raven rolls under the bottom rope.
8
Raven looks at the ref and then out of the ring at Cadryn.
9
Raven springboards to the top rope spinning effortlessly.
SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT TO THE OUTSIDE!
Huey D Louie: That idiot broke the count!!
Jim Ross: That idiot just performed a beautiful moonsault and you're concerned he broke the count?!
The ref begins the count again.
1
2
Both men struggle trying to stand
3
4
Cadryn somehow reaches the apron first and begins dragging himself up.
5
Cadryn to his feet begins to pull himself under the bottom rope.
6
Cadryn almost in BUT RAVEN GRABS HIS FOOT.
7
Cadryn struggles but can't shake him. He decides to continue pulling himself in Raven be damned
8
9
CADRYN ALL THE WAY IN.
RAVEN IN!
Both men roll to the center of the ring and begin to work their way to their feet. They're both exhausted and begin clawing at each other trying to use the other to gain footing. Both men end up kneeling face to face. Raven lights Cadryn up with a chop that sends up reeling. Cadryn doesn't go down though, simply rocks back and then flows forward with a forearm that lands square on Ravens jaw. The shot rocks Raven but the man is a legend for a reason. The people's GOAT comes back and rips another massive chop across Cadryn's chest. Cadryn screams and grabs Raven's head landing a furry of forearms. Raven returns the favor and does the same. Both men continue to land forearms as they make their way to their feet. Raven hits and exceptional forearm that drives Cadryn stumbling back into the ropes. Cadryn rebounds uses to momentum to return the favor. Raven stumbles bouncing back into the ropes. Raven uses the ropes and gathers momentum taking two quick running steps. ROAD LESS TRAVELED. Cadryn just took Raven's head off with a running superkick! Cadryn falls into a pin.
1
2
KICKOUT!
Cadryn screams in frustration and disbelief. He uses the sudden burst of emotion and quickly stands lifting the rather limp living legend and stuffing his head between his legs. Cadryn powers the larger man up into a crucifix.
Jim Ross: Cadryn is looking to end it here for good!
FROM DUSK TILL DAWN
NO! Raven flipped completely and lands on his feet Cadryn hits the apron ass first. Raven sprints to the ropes running full speed back at the seated Cadryn. Cadryn covers his face expecting a shining wizard and Raven leaps over him. Cadryn stands quickly, turning DIVEBOMB! Raven nearly cuts Cadryn in half with a spear. Raven pins Cadryn hooking the leg.
1
2
KICKOUT!!!!
Jim Ross: MYGAWDWHATTAMATCH!
Raven's turn to be frustrated now. He stands dragging Cadryn to his feet. Cadryn surprises him with a strong punch to the gut that doubles Raven over. Cadryn stuffs Raven's head between his legs and faster than it takes to wrestle a calf Cadryn has Raven set up once again for from Dusk till Dawn. Raven struggles and Cadryn loses his balance falling backwards. Cadryn falls back into the ropes and Raven falls down landing on the apron but he twists his right knee and falls to a seated position. Cadryn spins seeing Raven in a compromised position. Cadryn sprints to the opposite ropes rebounding. Raven jumps to his feet and springs to the top rope doing a quick 180.
RAVENSAULT!
Raven hooks a leg.
1
2
3!
The lights in the arena go down as this tune hits.
JT’s music resounds throughout the area as a spotlight illuminates him at the top of the ramp. It follows him as the rest of the arena is shrouded in darkness while the GM makes his way to the ring. The crowd are a mixture of surprise and bewilderment. JT enters the ring and ushers them to calm down as his music fades out. He then beckons to the lighting crew, and the main arena lights slowly come back up, revealing a long table in the center of the ring, flanked by two large leather chairs. On the table sits a leather bound folder, with two gold pens either side.
Good evening Hollywood!
The crowd cheers.
Are you enjoying Savage?
YEESS!!!!
I can’t hear you!
YYYYYEEEESSSSSS!!!!
Well I got some bad news for you all, because our next little feature here isn’t a match. In fact, I’m having to make sure that it WON’T turn into a fight - because the two guys I want to address right now, need to stop fighting - at least for tonight. So, with that in mind, I want to bring out Jack Cain, and The Clone of Brock Lesnar.
Brock Lesnar walks onto the stage with a displeased expression on his face. The crowd roars, as Lesnar cracks his neck side to side and heads down to the ring. Brock’s ignores the fans, as he enters the ring, stone cold serious.
Now Brock, I know you’re angry, and you’re frustrated - but I want you to contain that anger while Jack comes out here, because I want you and him to hold a cease fire for just a few minutes.
JT, do me a favor and watch your mouth. This isn’t about you one bit. Jack, get your ass out here, so we can settle this face to face like men. C’mon, Jack! Don’t be a woman! Man the fuck up! Get your ass out here-
Cain appears at the top of the stage with a determined, angry look on his face. Never taking his eyes off Lesnar, he stalks his way to the ring, fists clenched. He climbs the ring steps and cautiously steps through the ropes, before stopping in front of Lesnar and JT. He steps up to Lesnar and the two go nose to nose before JT interjects.
Whoa you two - Jack? What I’ve just said to Brock goes for you too. But before I tell you why you’re both here, I want you to tell me, and all these people, what the Hell’s going on with you two? I just want a clear understanding of the situation before we go any further.
This big shot has a horse shoe stuck up his ass, and I’m just about ready to yank it out and beat him over the head with it! I’m going to put this punk in his place, and if you don’t move your ass, JT, I’m gonna make an example of you too.
I’ll tell you why I’m here Washington. I’m here cos this fake fucker stuck his nose in my business. Thomas Nixon lost his title to me, and then this turd shows up and blindsides me, and then he thinks it’s fun to start cheap shottin’ me whenever he likes. Well I got news for you Brock, I ain’t backin’ down from Nixon, or anyone else. And thanks to Theo Pryce, I’m gettin’ another shot at the TV Title - but before I do that, I gotta deal with you. So I’m gonna lay it out plain and simple: you don't get outta this ring right now, I’m gonna split your fuckin’ head open.
A smirk crosses Lesnar’s face, and it quickly turns to a big smile.
You really think that you can waltz down her and tell me to get out of the ring? I’ve fought bigger man that you in the octagon, and I’ve tossed around way bigger champions in the ring. I’d tell you to watch your mouth, but I’m planning on beating your ass either way. Be a man. Quit telling me to leave. I’m telling you to stay. JT, you should leave, so I can take care of this joke right now.
I ain’t a joke you roided up shit. I’m very, very intent on makin’ your sad existence even worse. I plan to smack the teeth outta your mouth and have fun doin’ it, while all your lizard overlords realize what a failed experiment this actually was. Get used to that word: failure. It;s what you are, and it’s what you’re gonna turn out to be. You’re finished.
Hold on there boys, now this kinda thing is exactly why I called you both here. On the desk behind you both, is a contract - which will give both of you the opportunity to destroy each other if you want to. If you both sign that, at King of The Ring, you’ll fight one on one. But there's one condition.
Both men stare holes into JT, who suddenly realizes he’s bossing around two guys twice the size of him.
And.. and that condition is… neither of you can physically attack one another UNTIL King of the Ring. If you agree to that, just sign the document.
Cain and Lesnar look at one another. They both walk to opposite sides of the table. Cain picks up his pen, and Lesnar takes his. JT steps in between and opens the folder, revealing the contract. He puts it in front of Brock, who briefly looks down before signing his name. JT swivels it round to Cain, who does his part. JT picks up the folder, looks furtively at both men, then backs out of the ring.
And that match will be a LAST MAN STANDING MATCH!
The crowd roars at the announcement.
Both men stand on opposite sides of the table, with violent expressions on their faces, knowing they can’t attack each other. Lesnar grabs the table and hurls it to one side and the two go nose to nose again. They begin trash talking each other as the camera fades to commercial.
Tag Team Tournament Match
The XWF Power Couple
- vs -
Team  2.0
- vs -
Robbie Bourbon & Jack Cain - The Motherfuckers
2500 Word Limit
Standard Rules |
Jim Ross: This one is gonna be good, you better bet!
Huey D. Louie: The winner goes to the Pay Per View to face the Kings and try to dethrone the best tag team in history!
Jim Ross: A tall task, indeed
The lights in the arena go down and the crowd buzzes, a collective scream.
The crowd goes nuts as the lights fade into yellow and white as Heavy Metal Batman drones through the PA system.
Tig O' Bitties: This is a 6 person tag team match, set for one fall! The winning team will go on to face the Kings for the Tag Team Titles at King of the Ring! Introducing first, the team of Guppy Parsh and Scully, Team 2.0!
Guppy and Scully appear from behind the curtain. Guppy jumps up and down and Scully throws his arms in the air. They walk down the ramp, slapping five to fans and pointing to signs in the crowd.
Jim Ross: A fan favorite, for sure, but they have a tough assignment here tonight. They upset the arguable favorites in Round 1, do they have some magic left in the tank?
Huey D. Louie: magic is the best kind!
Scully walks up the steps and Guppy jumps up onto the apron, stepping through the ropes as the two stand in the ring, preparing for their opponents.
As the lights go low again, the crowd begins to buzz for a second time. There is electricity in the air as a single spotlight comes onto Tigs in the ring.
Kid Rock and MGK take over the speaker system as the lights go red, white and blue.
Tig O' Bitties: Introducing next, their opponents, the team of Jack Cain and Robbie Bourbon.....the Motherfuckers!
Robbie and Cain step through the curtain, their looks focused as lasers on the two in the ring. They throw their arms up in unison, looking at each other, before running and siding into the ring. Bourbon gets on one turnbuckle, his arms up, and Cain on the other, doing the same.
Jim Ross: These two are new partners, and you have to think this is a bit of a shaky alliance. They are going to have to be damn near flawless to pull this off tonight!
Huey D. Louie: They have what it takes, for sure, but do they have what it takes to beat the Kings?
Jim Ross: They should focus on tonight's matchup. This next team may have a few tricks up their sleeve as well!
The lights go off completely now, with only the cell phone lights of random fans who chose to take pictures of the upcoming entrance.
"FOLLOW ME" comes up on the screen in blue letters......it stays on the screen until it melts in pink letters, reading
"PERFECTION". After about 5 seconds, in half blue and half pink letters, "
POWER" comes up on the X-Tron as Aramanthe's drums and guitar riff begin.
Huey D. Louie: Oh yeah! Here is my choice! I wonder what color scheme Jenny will have on tonight!
Jim Ross: The Devil's Duo, for sure, The XWF's Resident Power Couple may look great ascetically, but they are nothing to mess with also. Very skilled team!
At the 10 second mark, Chris and Jenny step through the smoke at the rampway. Jenny bends and twists, blowing a kiss (WWE Maria) and Chris stands behind her, throwing up an X with his arms (symbolizing him killing AX3). Chris is shirtless, wearing his grey and red tights with his trenchcoat over the top (Rated R Edge), and Jenny her red and black leather bikini bottom and wrap-around top. When the bend is finished, he twirls her around, bends her back, they kiss, then walk to the ring.
Tig O' Bitties: And finally.....their opponents, residing in Clearwater Beach, Florida, The XWF's Resident Power Couple.....Chris Chaos and Jenny Myst!
When they get to the ring he holds the ropes open for and she enters slowly, Velvet Sky style with a step through and a little ass shake.
Huey D. Louie: Oh yeah! The best ass in the business!
Jim Ross: Try to focus, please.
DING
DING
DING
Jim Ross: Here we go!
Chris starts in the ring, with Jack Cain across from him. Parsh steps into the ring but the refs backs him off. Cain and Chris circle each other, studying. Finally, they tie up, but the big powerful Cain quickly gets the upper hand and lifts Chaos off his feet and tosses him into the corner. With an elbow he crashes into Chaos, but keeps him there with a series of chops and shoulders, displaying his massive aggression early on.
Grabbing Chris by the arm, Cain whips him into the second corner and finishes off that one with a splash.
Jim Ross: Scary display of power here from Cain!
Huey D. Louie: Can someone tag Jenny in already?!
Scoop slam from Cain onto Chaos, as he reaches out and tag Robbie. Holding Chris in a modified chicken wing, Bourbon drops Chaos to a knee with a shot to the ribs off the double team. Bourbon wraps a big arm around the neck of Chaos and puts a knee in the back. He pulls back, making Chris arch his back. Jenny slaps the turnbuckle and reaches out for a tag but he is much too far away.
Bourbon pulls harder, his teeth grit in an intense manner from under the mask. Chris, however, is able to get an elbow, then another, then another, to the side of the head of Robbie B. Once he loosens the hold, Chris slips out and rolls away, but Bourbon isn't far behind. He puts the boots to Chaos as he uses the ropes to pull himself up. Bourbon boots him again, knees him in the gut.
Jim Ross: Cain and Bourbon have thrown Chaos off his game here. He hasn't been able to get anything offensively.
Huey D. Louie: Jenny! Tag her! I want Jenny!
He whips Chaos into the ropes and goes for a clothesline, but Chris ducks, coming off the ropes on the other side and hitting Bourbon with a clothesline. The big man hits the mat, but immediately sits up. Chaos comes off the ropes again and dropkicks Robbie in the chest. He turns around, however, right into a riht hand from Cain. He stumbles back, holding his mouth, into a spinesbuster from Bourbon!!!!!
Robbie hooks the leg.
1
2
Chaos gets a shoulder up.
Robbie walks over as Cain reaches is hand out. Scully and Parsh have their hands out too. Robbie taunts Parsh as he leads Chaos by the hair towards the Motherfuckers corner. Tossing him into the corner, he begins striking Chaos with huge blows, but the former Uni champ battles back, puching out of the corner. The two trade blows out of the corner before the huge ginger grabs a handful of blonde locks and slams Chris's head into the turnbuckle.
Then again.
Then again.
Annnnnnnd again.
Chaos stumbles out to the middle, wobbly. Robbie comes off the ropes and turns him nearly inside out with a clothesline.
Bourbon throws his arms up but when he turns around he doesn't see Parsh, who is up on the top rope. Guppy jumps and kicks Bourbon in the chest and he stumbles back, falling over the ropes to the mat outside. Cain steps into the ring and grabs Parsh, but Scully cuts him off with punches, backing him into the corner. Parsh and Scully double team the big man in the corner and Jenny, who knows Cain isn't the legal man, stands in the corner and grins.
Chris is getting to his feet. He throws her arms up with the "come on" motion, crouching. Scully turns around.
SPEAR!!!!!!!!
Parsh comes at Chaos, who tosses him into Cain, who lifts Parsh by the neck and drops him head and neck first over the top rope. On the rebound, Chaos is there.
SPEAR ON PARSH!!!!!!!!
Jim Ross: Good god almighty, Chaos just broke both members of Team damn near in half and......uh oh.
Chaos stands up and comes face to face with Cain, who snickers at him. Chaos backs away, towards Jenny. Just then, Bourbon comes off the top rope, Chaos moves, and rolls up Bourbon in a small package.
1
2
Bourbon powers out with such force it sends Chaos into Cain.....who hits the knock out punch!
Chaos is out cold!
Jenny comes off the top rope, attempting to cross body Cain, who catches her mid air......
Spinebuster!!!!!!!!
Jim Ross: All hell has broken loose here! And Cain and Bourbon are standing tall!
Huey D. Louie: Is Jenny okay?!
Jim Ross: Does she look okay?!
Cain covers Chris as Robbie steps through the ropes back into his corner.
1!
2!
3----Chaos gets a shoulder up at the last second.
Cain slaps the mat, but as he gets up he gets hit with a bulldog from Parsh, who comes out of nowhere, and slams his face onto the mat. The ref backs Parsh into the corner as Robbie yells and points.
Jenny rolls under the ropes and out to the mat as Chaos begins to stir. Cain gets to one knee.
The crowd begins to chant.
"WE WANT GUPPY CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE WANT GUPPY! CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP!"
Chaos is up. Cain grabs him, but Chaos slithers around. Fallaway slam from Chaos in a display of desperation and power. He tags in Scully, as Jenny is still down. Parsh hops onto the top rope and jumps off with a frog splash onto Cain.
Cover!
1!
2!
Cain gets a shoulder up. Parsh wincing a bit from the spear. He lifts up Cain, who shoves him back into the corner, and Bourbon grabs him by the arms, holding him in place as Cain runs for a splash. Parsh is able to squirt out. Cain stops short, just before colliding with Robbie, and turns around into a flying forearm from Scully, who was quickly tagged in by Parsh.
Scully walks Cain back out to the middle, and knees the big man in the gut. Scully drives the knee into the face of Cain with a brain buster and bounces off the ropes.
Swinging Neckbreaker from Scully! Cain is down! Scully turns around just as Jenny comes off the top rope with a drop kick! Scully is down and Jenny wipes her lip, breathing heavy. She looks at Robbie, flips him off, then comes off the ropes with a rolling thunder, landing on Scully before rolling out of the ring.
Jim Ross: Jenny with the unfair advantage there!
Huey D. Louie: Scully should be lucky! That is the only female body that will be touching him for a while!
Cain isn't down long as he gets to his feet and tags in Robbie. Scully reaches out towards Parsh, but Robbie pulls him to the center of the ring.
He grabs the legs, and sits down into a Boston Crab! Scully screams out and reaches for the ropes. He is in the middle of the ring, however, and has nowhere to go! Robbie applies more pressure as Scully winces and moans, reaching.........
reaching...............
Bourbon is almost in a full sit.
Jim Ross: SCULLY IS GONNA TAP HERE! BOURBON HAS HIM DEAD TO RIGHTS IN THE CENTER OF THE RING!
Scully slaps the mat. The ref asks if he wants to quit. Scully yells no, but he has a hand in the air......Robbie sits deeper into the crab, yelling as Scully to quit.
Just then, Jenny gets up on the apron. Cain comes to meet her. The ref is then distracted by the two meeting in the center of the ring. Meanwhile, Scully taps but the ref doesn't see it.
Jim Ross: Scully is tapping! Scully is taping out! The motherfuckers have won this match but the ref doesn't see it!
Cain and Jenny are nose to belly button, and the ref tries to separate them. Just then Chaos clubs Robbie in the back of the head with a forearm, breaking the hold. Bourbon stumbles forward.....Chaos then grabs Cain, and pulls her away from Jenny, and Cain gets Chaos a hard shot, knocking him down. Parsh comes off the top rope and the crowd goes ape shit as he kicks Cain in the face! Jenny grabs Parsh and throws him head first out of the ring and turns around and bumps into the stomach of Bourbon. She backs up......her eyes wide. Knowing she provided the distraction that cost them the match he backs her into the corner, shaking his head.
Chaos is back in the ring, and he spins Bourbon around, kneeing him in the gut then coming off the ropes with a knee to the face. Bourbon stumbles back and Jenny grabs him by the masked face. She sits on the top rope and throws and arm up........then spins and hits a massive spike DDT! But as she comes off it she runs into a boot to the face from Cain and Chaos charges, but Cain moves, throwing him shoulder first into the corner!
Cain picks up Jenny, and locks her in the bearhig that injured her back several weeks ago. She begins to thrash, but he squeezes tighter.
Huey D. Louie: Someone get that monster off her! Unhand her! Damnit!
Jim Ross: She stuck her nose in business that wasn't hers. She wasn't legal and she cost Bourbon and Cain the match! She had this coming!
Huey D. Louie: Blasphemy!
Cain squeezes again, Jenny yells. She begins punching Cain in the back and upper neck to try to break the hold but it doesn't work on the big monster. He squeezes again.
"Gahhh! Noo!"
A crack can be heard. Another squeeze and another crack and she goes into puddy in his arms. He grins, and drops her limp body to the mat.
Just then, Scully is back in the ring.
He grabs Cain.
ANGLE SLAM!
Bourbon is up.
ANGLE SLAM!
Chaos charges, Scully ducks, knee........
ANGLE SLAM!
Jim Ross: Buh Gawd Scully has cleared house here! Team now has the advantage!
He tags in Parsh who goes for a splash on Bourbon.
BOOOOOOOM!
The crowd chants "This is awesome! Clap clap clap clap clap! This is awesome! Clap clap clap clap clap!"
Parsh covers.
1
2
Bourbon kicks out! Guppy can't believe it! Guppy picks up Bourbon and whips him into the corner. Chaos slaps Robbie hard on the back, tagging himself in. Chaos elbows Bourbon, and Scully pulls him by the legs to the outside where they begin to tussle.
Chris enters the ring and begins to exchange blows with Parsh. Back him up into the ropes, Jenny, holding her back and wincing, looks pissed. She reaches into her bra as Parsh and Chaos spin back and forth exhanging punches. Chris has Parsh ready for the Equalizer, but he wiggles and slides off coming face to face with Jenny. She reaches into her bra and pulls out her mace. She goes to spray Guppy, but he ducks and Jenny SPRAYS CHRIS IN THE FACE WITH THE PEPPER SPRAY!
He yells, covering his eyes and stumbling. Parsh hits a standing drop kick on Jenny, knocking her off the apron.
Parsh rolls up Chaos in a small package pin!
Jim Ross: Guppy Parsh has Chaos rolled up!
The crowd chants along with the pin.
1!
2!
3!
CHAOS KICKS OUT A HALF SECOND TOO LATE!
Jim Ross: PARSH PINNED CHAOS! GUPPY PARSH HAS ROLLED UP BOTH JIM CAEDUS AND CHRIS CHAOS IN THIS TOURNAMENT, AND HE JUST SENT HIS TEAM TO THE PAY PER VIEW!
The crowd goes nuts as Parsh rolls out of the ring, a look of disbelief on his face as well. Chaos slaps the mat as Jenny limps into the ring, trying to console him.
Tig O' Bitties: The Winners of the match, and the NUMBER ONE CONTENDERS FOR THE TAG TEAM TITLES.......GUPPY PARSH AND SCULLY, TEAM
!
| Winners: Team 2.0 |
In the ring, Jenny is getting Chris to his feet. He isn't trying to hear it. She tries to hug him but he shoves her. She falls back onto her butt, tears in her eyes. He stares daggers through his red eyes as he exits the ring.
Jim Ross: Trouble in paradise for the Power Couple!
Huey D. Louie: Does this mean she is single! I'm single! Jennnyyyyyyyyy!
She sits in the ring shocked as Guppy and Scully hold their arms up on the top of the ramp---Bourbon and Cain try to catch their bearings and Chris exits stage right.
CAN YOU TAKE ME HIGHER!?!?!?!
"Higher" by Creed starts playing and the fans look around in curiosity, unfamiliar with whose theme song is playing when suddenly XWF Intern Gaybe Lincoln steps out from the back wearing tattered clothing and a clipboard in his hands. He casually strolls down the entry ramp and rolls into the ring.
"Hi everyone. For those of you who are unfamiliar with who I am, my name is Gaybraham Lincoln, or Gaybe Lincoln for short. I am an Intern here at the XWF and the person responsible for hosting the XWF Tag Team Tournament. And it is my pleasure to congratulate Guppy Parsh and Scully, Team 2.0 for winning the tournament and the right to face The Kings at King Of The Ring. You fellas truly earned your shot at The Kings by winning not one, not two but three matches. Good luck gentlemen. Now head to the back and rest up. You boys deserve it."
Guppy and Scully celebrate for a few more seconds and then climb out of the ring, walk up the ramp and disappear out of sight.
"So now that we have officially crowned new number one contenders that means that my job here as an Intern has come to a close and according to the stipulations of the contract I signed several months ago that means that I am now the newest XWF General Mana..."
"I Wanna Rock!"
The high pitched wail of Dee Snider pierces the air as the Twisted Sister classic pumps through the PA system. As two big pyro towers shoot off on either side of the stage, "Loverboy" Vinnie Lane spins out of the entrance ramp, wearing his favorite t-shirt, a cutoff Faster Pussycat screen print, long silver tights and shining silver boots. The crowd pops as Loverboy struts down the aisle, strumming the air guitar (across his championship belt, if applicable) and leaping into the air with a jumping split. As he hops onto the ring apron, he swings around, facing the crowd, and pumps his fist along to the music, singing along and inciting the crowd to do so as well.
"Whoa slow your roll dude. It's true your contract did in fact stipulate that you would get a promotion to General Manager but you see what you failed to notice was the fine print. And the fine print states that you are to find a tag team that can beat The Kings and well, you didn't do that. Not even close. You think a team called Team 2.0 can beat The Kings? Are you kidding me dude? What happened to Caedus and Trax? Or Bourbon and Raven? Those teams might have stood a chance but instead a team that literally identifies themselves as are your solution to the XWF's Kings problem? You know what? I don't even wanna talk about this anymore it's giving me a headache. So you know what i'm gonna do? Because you failed so spectacularly I am left with no choice but to punish you. So no, you aren't going to be promoted to General Manager, instead I am going to make you a wrestler. And your very first match will be a handicapped match...and it starts....
RIGHT NOW!!"
Much to the dismay of the crowd BX3 comes out from the back. Universal Champion Brucette Blingsteen is the first to appear from behind the curtain followed by the Basic Bitch Doctor Joshua Reno and then everyone's least favorite
handicapped handicapable cocksucker Bilbo Brommer Blumpkinz in his motorized wheelchair. Blingsteen and Reno each grab hold of the handle bars attached to the back of Bilbo's wheelchair and then strap themselves in by the waist. Brommer licks his lips all creepy like and then smashes the big red button on the side of his chair which instantly propels the wheelchair forward at precisely 88 miles per hours until it crashes into the ring. Reno and Blingsteen fly into the ring like they were shot out of a cannon, the later of which takes Gaybe Lincol out at the knees as he was too stunned at what was going on to even attempt to move out of the way.
The bell rings making the match official.
Reno starts laying boots to Gaybe's face while Blingsteen walks around the ring holding the Universal Title in the air to a chorus of boos. On the outside of the ring Bilbo hits a few buttons on his wheelchair and then rolls forward and into the ring.
With Gaybe still getting kicked in the face repeatedly by Reno Bilbo is able to crawl his way over to Gaybe, pulls himself ontop of him and starts licking his face up and down like it were a salty lollipop.
"This is terrible. Someone has to come out here and put a stop to this. Lincoln is just an intern he's not a wrestler."
Vincent Lane stands off in the corner laughing as one of his staff members continues to get his ass kicked.
Blingsteen places the title around her shoulder and then without warming jams her stiletto directly into Gaybe's eye resulting in a scream so loud that Bilbo's glasses shatter instantaneously as blood starts squirting out of the sides of Gaybe's right eye socket.
The XWF referee leans over the ropes and immediately starts puking his guts out as Blingsteen digs the heel in even further.
Finally Brucette takes her heel out of Gaybe's skull revealing a gaping hole where an eye used to be.
"Gross."
Reno looks around unsure what exactly to do until Brucette looks at him smugly and nods which is the official BX3 signal for "pin the
" which is exactly what Reno does.
With Bilbo now licking the blood off of Gaybe's face Reno kneels down and drapes his body across Gaybe's for the pin.
Lane grabs the referee who was still puking his guts out by the collar and screams at him to make the count.
The ref falls to his knees and starts counting.
1
2
3!!!
The final bell sounds and Reno picks up Bilbo and the two celebrate their first career victory in each others arms while Blingsteen parades her title around the ring again.
XWF Medics come down to the ring and immediately start tending to Lincoln.
It takes a few minutes for the medics to strap Lincoln down on a board and then gently push it out of the ring and onto a stretcher.
The team is about halfway up the ramp when Lane starts talking into the mic again.
"Oh and one more thing dude. You're FIRED!!!"
Savage goes to commercial as Vincent Lane climbs out of the ring and starts walking up the ramp to the back.
MAIN EVENT
Television Title Match
Neville Sinclair
- vs -
Finn Kuhn
2500 Word Limit
15 Minute Time Limit
|
Tig O' Bitties: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the XWF TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP!
The fans go wild as they know what's coming next.
It's time, JR! Neville Sinclair! Finn Kühn! Who's leaving Savage with the gold?!
The fans have themselves on the edge of their seats, and I can't help but be on the edge of my seats with them!
No Mercy begins it's slow beginning, with all lights in the arena going out sans a lone spotlight at the stage. After a few seconds, Finn comes out with his head bowed, hands behind his back and a black hooded jacket being worn. Finn begins to slowly walk his way to the ring, the spotlight following him. As the song begins to say,
"No Mercy..." for the first time, Finn kneels on one knee, hands going to the metal grate, and as the song revs up, Finn shoots up, removing his hood and runs into the ring. From there, Finn poses on the turnbuckle for the fans, and bounces on his feet as he prepares for the match.
Huey D. Louie: I have to say, JR, Finn looks ready to go! Have to ask, who are you betting on for this match?
Jim Ross:Well, Huey, it's tough. You have two young up-and-comers who can twist you into a pretzel, run circles around you or suplex you until your head falls off, but Neville's been looking unstoppable lately, while meanwhile Finn recently came off on a rough loss. If I were a betting man, my chances would be with Neville.
Huey D. Louie: I may just take you up on that JR!
Neville walks down to the ring, carrying a glass of scotch in his hand. Before entering the ring, he downs the glass and then proceeds to bounce on his feet to get ready for the match.
Jim Ross: I've said it before and I'll say it again, why would anyone in their right mind drink before a wrestling match?
Huey D. Louie: Shhh, Tig's about to do the introductions!
Tig O' Bitties: Introducing the challenger...
The fans begin to boo wildly as Finn walks to the center of the ring with his arms outstretched, a cocky smile on his face.
Tig O' Bitties: From Frankfurt, Germany, weighing in at 200 pounds... he is the Young Lion, FINN KÜHNNNNNNNNN!
The boos only get louder and louder as Finn's smile stretches. He mouths off to Neville, saying
"I'm coming for that belt," which causes Neville to roll his eyes in response, as if to say "Keep dreaming." Eventually, Finn goes back into his corner after a few seconds.
Tig O' Bitties: And introducing the champion...
An equal amount of boos greet Neville as he steps into the middle of the ring, holding the championship high.
Tig O' Bitties: From Oxford, England, weighing in at 225 pounds... he is the reigning and defending XWF Television Champion, NEVILLE SINCLAIIIIIIIIRRRR!
Neville hands his title to the referee as he holds it high, showing the gold on display. After a few seconds, he hands it off to Tig who hands the belt to the timekeeper.
"MONEY TALKS!!!"
"Greenback Boogie" by Ima Robot starts playing as Theo Pryce walks out from the back. He slaps hands with some of the fans as he walks down the aisle. Pryce walks up the ring steps and steps through the ropes. He smiles at both men and grabs a ref from the ring announcer.
Good evening fellas. Sorry to interrupt and I promise to let this match get underway in just a moment but before it does I wanted to make a quick announcement and this felt like the time to do it. Neville Sinclair it has been decided that you are the July Superstar of the Month. Congratulations to you. It is absolutely well deserved as evidence by that title you currently possess. And now, without further delay. Tonight's Main Event!!
Theo hands the mic back off to the ring announcer as he climbs out of the ring and walks to the back.
DING!
DING!
DING!
With the bell tolled, the timer appears on screen.
Finn and Neville waste no time, getting into a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Neville uses his sleight weight advantage to try and push Finn into the corner, but Finn turns it around at the last second and shoves Neville into there. The ref gets involved after a few seconds and tries to break the hold. Finn backs away-- but not after delivering a loud
SMACK! to the side of Neville's face! The audience winces as the referee mouths off to Finn, who shrugs it off and motions for Neville to come get some.
Huey D. Louie: I must say, Finn has quite the pair of balls on him to disrespect his opponent like this!
Jim Ross: And it looks like Neville Sinclair isn't gonna take to kindly to that slap across his face!
The two lock up again this time, and again Finn takes control, this time locking Sinclair in a side headlock. This time Neville is prepared though, as he pushes Finn into the ropes and then proceeds to Irish Whip him, and as Finn bounces off the ropes Neville lies flat on his back as Finn jumps over. As Finn comes back around, Neville leap-frogs over Finn, forcing him to go under. On the second wrap-around, Neville tosses Finn to the mat with a hip toss! Finn immediately recoils into a sitting position, pain flaring in his back from the hip toss. And then Neville doesn't let up, knocking Finn's back with a HUGE soccer-style kick! The fans and the ref wince as Neville looks up at the time.
Jim Ross: I told you Neville wasn't gonna take that slap kindly! HUGE hip toss and kick combination there by Neville!
Neville isn't looking to let up, trying to get Finn up, but Finn swats Neville's hands away when he gets up and sends Neville's head spinning with a HUGE European Uppercut! Neville goes rocking back into the ropes! Finn goes for an irish whip, but Neville reverses! On the whip-back though, Finn connects with a running high knee! The
crack could be heard in the nosebleeds as Neville drops like a sack of bricks! Finn with the cover!
ONE!
TWO!
KICK-OUT! Finn gets up and starts arguing with the referee as he's almost convinced he just won the Television Championship in the quickest title match ever. In the middle of his argument with the ref though, Neville strikes with a running chop block to Finn's injured left leg! Finn cries out as he crumples, Neville seemingly targeting the left leg now.
Jim Ross: I'm sure we're gonna see some expert limb targeting here now by Neville Sinclair! For those who don't know, Finn Kühn was recently injured in a car crash, and his left leg now has a knee brace over it to try and keep it steady, though I don't know how long it's gonna hold!
Huey D. Louie: See Ross, the thing about knee braces is that it paints a target on that leg. And Neville has his target zeroed in on.
The referee pushes Neville away, who obliges. As Finn tries to crawl to the ropes, Neville struts confidently to Finn, before placing the boots to his injured knee. Finn cries out again as Neville looks to punish Finn.
Finn turns himself over, however Neville gets to Finn's side and starts hooking in his legs after dragging him into the middle of the ring! Neville manages to cinch in an expertly-applied Inverted Figure-Four Leglock as Finn screams out in pain!
Jim Ross:Good Lord! The referee needs to get in there and stop the damned match! This is too much!
Huey D. Louie: For once Ross, I agree. The man got into a damned car accident! I understand you gotta protect your property, but there's a line to cross, and Neville crossed it!
The referee gets in Finn's face asking him if he wants to submit! Finn shakes his head no in response! Finn uses his hands! Trying to crawl his way over to the ropes... He's almost there...!
Neville realizes what's going on at the last minute, takes Finn's arms in his hands, and begins to pull back! Finn begins to scream in agony as he can no longer reach the ropes!
Huey D. Louie: Well, JR, this looks like it's over. Finn was millimeters away from grabbing the rope, but he can't even grab it now!
Jim Ross: Wait... wait a minute Huey! Finn Kühn is rocking himself and Neville towards the bottom rope!
Finn is using his head! Trying to use it to rock himself towards the rope! Both Neville and the referee look flabbergasted! FINN KÜHN BITES ONTO THE BOTTOM ROPE TO STAY IN THIS!
Huey D. Louie: UNBELIEVABLE! How did Finn Kühn manage to get out of that?!
Jim Ross: This young man has shown an unbelievable amount of heart here tonight. But how much heart can withstand Neville Sinclair's targeted attacks?
The referee gets in and forces Sinclair to drop the hold, much to his disgust as he smacks Finn Kühn. Finn tries to get back to his feet, but his left leg gives out from under him, forcing him to cling to the ropes. The referee is asking Finn if he wants to continue, but when Finn notices Sinclair coming right towards him, Finn pushes the referee away! The referee's back is turned now as FINN LOW-BLOWS SINCLAIR! The fans begin to litter the place with boos and jeers as the referee gets in Finn's face again and tells him not to push him again or there will be repercussions. Finn just shrugs it off and notices the downed Sinclair.
Hopping on one leg now, Finn heads onto the apron, and goes up to the top rope on one foot! He sizes up Sinclair...
OVERLORD (Shooting Star Press) OFF OF ONE FOOT! The crisp motion in mid-air is done to perfection as SINCLAIR RAISES HIS KNEES! Finn collides directly with Sinclair's knees as all of Finn's breath exits his body! Sinclair rolls Finn over and goes for the pin!
ONE!
TWO!
THR- FINN KICKS OUT! Sinclair can't believe it! The timer ticks down precariously as Sinclair looks at it, time radically depleted since the last time either man had a look!
Neville is furious now, and yells out as he picks up Neville by the head. Standing him up, he hugs Finn and throws him back in a massive belly-to-belly suplex. Finn, resilliant, is back up, wobbling towards Neville, who backs him up with a huge European Uppercut. Neville advances towards the stumbling newbie and Kuhn, out of nowhere, delivers a knee to the gut.......
DDT
Both men are down, exhausted.
Jim Ross: Both of these men are spent. That DDT took a lot out of both men!
Kuhn has Neville where he wants him!
Both men are getting to their feet, and Kuhn bounces off the ropes, going for the running high knee, Neville ducks. Atomic drop on Kuhn, then a clothesline.
Neville drops to one knee, spent.
Kuhn is stirring, however. Neville glances up at the X-Tron.
Neville lifts Kuhn, he needs to finish this soon. But then out of the blue.....
KNIFE IN THE BACK
Jim Ross: Buh gawd! The backstabber and this one could be over!
Kuhn hooks.
1
2
3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jim Ross: Fin did it! Buh gawd Fin Kuhn did it!
Huey D. Louie: Not so fast Jim..........look at the monitor!
The ref is deliberating with Tig's and the time keeper before coming over to the announce table to watch the monitor.
Outside the ring, Finn rips the belt from the time keeper and rolls into the ring, holding it high in the air with a smug smirk.
After about 45 seconds, the ref waves it off. Neville's foot was on the ropes.
Tig O'Bitties: After checking the replay, the referee has determined that Neville's foot was on the ropes as his hand hit three, therefore, it is not a pinfall. This match continues!
Kuhn has a look on his face as if he smelled shit. He yells
"NO! This is MY belt! I beat Neville!"
Just then, Sinclair grabs him by the shoulder and spins him around, knee to the gut.
E-D-U-C-A-T-I-O-N!
Neville for the pin.
1
2
3!
Jim Ross: Neville steals one here!
Huey D. Louie: He is the TV Champ and that is why! He survived, JR, real champions SURVIVE!
Tigs: The winner of this match...........and STILLLLLLLLLL XWF Television Champion..........Neville Sinclair!
Neville grabs his belt from the ref and holds it in the air as Finn rolls under the ropes and to the mat.
Graves walks through the curtain with the large dufflebag still on his shoulder. Graves ignores the fans booing him as he marches straight down to the ring.
Micheal Graves better hope that Jim Caedus isn’t in the arena tonight! The rivalry between those two men has reached a fever pitch, and it has only taken a week to do so!
Well JR, that’s what happens when you stab your best friend in the back like Jim Caedus did!
Excuse me!?! It was Graves who stabbed Jim in the back Huey!
STOP TRYING TO PUSH YOUR REVISIONIST HISTORY ON US JR!
Graves is now in the ring, the duffle bag is on the mat beside of him, and he has a mic in hand. The music fades away as Graves stands there, waiting to talk over the boos from the crowd.
Why did I attack Jim Caedus?
*BOOS*
What would cause me to throw away a brotherhood like I did?
*BOOS*
The fact is, there NEVER WAS A BROTHERHOOD!
*BOOS*
When Jim Caedus approached me to join the stable that he was creating, it was just before he cashed in his briefcase and became the Universal Champion. Before he cashed in, sure, we are like brothers. We talked everyday. We went over strategies, we hung out and bullshitted in our off time. It was fun, but once Jim cashed in, he became distant, hard to reach, paranoid. I would go weeks at a time without hear a word from my so called “brother”. At least, not until he would pop his head up from whatever hole he was hiding in, just to accuse me of being a bad friend for not coming out and saving him from an ambush. Of course, he didn’t care if I was even psychically able to help him. It was just the fact that I wasn’t there that screamed traitor to Jim.
*BOOS*
It didn’t take me long to figure out what “the founder” of AX3 was really planning when he brought of together. He wasn’t looking for a brotherhood. He was looking for protection! Protection from any of US challenging for his title, and protection by US to keep said title around his waist!
*BOOS*
OH SHUT YOUR MOUTHS
*BOOS*
NONE OF YOU KNOW THE TRUTH!
Micheal has completely lost his mind Huey…
Wait, you think that he was of sound mind before?
Jim, you are nothing more than a cowardly piece of shit, and I’m going to prove it to everyone at the King of The Ring!
*BOOS*
But, until then, I want to make amends. I want to be a better friend to you, than you ever were to me. Why? Because maybe, just maybe, after I expose you for the talentless prick that you are, maybe we can mend this friendship.
*BOOS*
So Jim, If you’re back there, come on down and lets get this party started!
I doubt Jim Caedus is in the arena tonight. Not after what happened last week, and how he feels the fans in California turned their backs on him.
Hey, these fans can’t help it if Jim’s a fuck up!
Come on Jim, I know you’re back there!
I’m telling you, I’d be highly surprised if Jim Caedus were here tonight. Graves knows that as well, so you have to wonder what he’s planning!
Fine Jimmy, nothing really changes does it? Just like when we were brothers, you’re gonna leave me to do everything myself.
*BOOS*
Graves grabs the duffle back and slides it over so that it is directly in front of him.
Jim, I wanted to prove to you that I was always a real friend. I wanted to prove to you that it was YOU that was the problem. So I went out, and I got you a gift. Not just any gift either. Something that would show you that I was always there. That I was always listening.
*BOOS*
I wanted to get you something that would come from the heart. Something that would touch your heart. I wanted to get you the ONE THING that you want most in this world!
Graves leans over and unzips the dufflebag.
Jimmy, I know the pain you feel each and every day, and I know the cause of that pain. So I hope that you accept this gift as a true sign of how much I love and respect you my brotherrrrr…
Graves grabs the dufflebag and dumps the contents into the ring. It’s a decomposing body.
OH MY GOD, IS THAT REAL!!??!!
WHAT THE FUCK!?!
Jimmy, I give to you, your father!!!
*DEAFENING BOOS*
I’ve seen some sick things in my day, but never anything that crossed the line quite like this!
I’ve got to agree with you JR! As much as I dislike Jim Caedus, this is just too much!
Graves stands in the ring laughing when suddenly he is tackled to the ground.
Wait, who is that!
That’s… JIM CAEDUS!!!
*THE CROWD POPS HUGE FOR THE VERY MAN THEY BOOED A WEEK EARLIER*
Caedus pummels the shit out of Graves with wild lefts and rights while pinning him to the ground. Graves can’t do anything but try, and fail to defend himself.
Jim Caedus isn’t playing any games, he’s taking the action straight to Graves!
Caedus pulls Graves up to his feet. Jim is looking for the Purgatory Punch, but Graves narrowly dodges it and drops, rolling out of the ring and running halfway up the ramp like his life depends on it.
Micheal Graves surely didn’t think that Jim Caedus would actually be here tonight, not after last week, but boy was he wrong!
Jim Caedus looks to the decomposing body that is laying in the middle of the ring. Jim gets an odd look on his face before bending down and touching the body. Jim then picks it up and throws it across the ring. At this point it becomes clear that the body is just a high quality prop. Jim charges to the ropes and begins screaming at Graves as Graves backs up the ramp slowly, laughing the entire time.
That corpse may have only been a prop, but Micheal Graves still crossed a line, and I have a feeling that he is going to regret it come King Of The Ring!
I can’t beleive that I’m saying this, but I hope the fuck up kicks the shit outta Gravy!
I guess we will find out soon enough. That's all the time we have for tonight folks. See you all in two weeks at King of The Ring!
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