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Wednesday Warfare 7/5
Author Message
Jefferson Jackson Offline
Warfare GM & XWF Business/Financial Supt



XWF FanBase:
(.Awaiting user update)


#1
07-07-2017, 05:41 PM



LIVE!
Wednesday, July 5th, 2017


From the Silverstein Eye Center Arena in Independence, Missouri......

[Image: 17953v.jpg]

Xtreme Wrestling Federation Presents:

[Image: baL0LZA.png]










Wednesday Warfare opens up on July 5th with an extended fireworks display as Neil Young's "Keep on Rockin' in the Free World" blares. The music cuts off and "Money" by Pink Floyd begins to play. The XWF's Business and Financial Superintendent General Manager of Warfare, Jefferson Jackson, steps out from the back and stops on the stage with a mic.

Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome!

There's a mixed reaction. JJ isn't on television as much these days and the Universe hasn't seen him in a while. In which case, most are probably just excited that there's probably a special announcement or something involved because that's the only time he's around.

He pauses and looks around to the crowd with a wide smile.

Welcome to Wedsneday!!! NIGHT!!!

He pauses again.

WARFARE!!!!!!!!

JJ starts walking back and forth on the stage as he talks to the crowd.

Now, as you all know, the next couple of Warfares are going to be pretty interesting, right! Next week, right here on Warfare, we begin hosting the annual King of the XWF Tournament!

JJ soaks in some cheers.

It'll all come down to one man at the end of August at the pay-per-view. One man crowned as King!

More cheers! The crowd is eating from his hand!

With also, the return of Archie Lawson!!

They're estatic!!

He's not here tonight though....

Booooooo.....

Sorry, but anyway. I've come out here to let all of you know that Wednesday Warfare has been at the top of sports programming worldwide for years now. There isn't a doubt in my mind that we can continue this for YEARS TO COME! Saying that, I'd like to announce that following the finals KING OF THE RING Tournament, the very next Warfare will kick off another WORLD TOUR! An amazing night with repercussions of the previous pay-per-view, along with the official CROWNING of the KING ceremony! It will be an epic night with appearances from ALL of you favorite XWF superstars. I----



Interrupted, JJ stands center stage shaking his mic up to his ear....

The opening riffs of "Amerika" rock the arena as irresponsibly huge red, white, and blue fireworks start to shoot off from the rafters. And when I say irresponsible, well....there's a kid in row 8 who's probably gonna be wearing an eye patch the rest of his life. JJ flees backstage as the pyros and fireworks shoot across it in no common direction.

But as that kid gets carted away Secret Service goons in long coats rush the ring in preparation for the appearance of America First. Engy appears first, looking a little tweaked out by the loudness of the fireworks. He looks at the ceiling nervously, muttering to himself. He's wearing an American flag patterned stovepipe hat. Madison follows out next, wearing a red white and blue blazer and mini-skirt. She's mugging for the camera's as she walks to the ring. She orders Engy to hold down the ropes for her as she gets in, and immediately demands a mic.


HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY EVERYONE!

This draws a mixed reaction. On one hand, AMERICA! On the other, it IS Madison. Madison ignores the mixed reaction.

Engy and I consider this a most sacred day. I mean, think about it. What other nation in the entire modern world was birthed from such humble beginnings and rose up to become the biggest swingin' dick country of all time.

Now, I could go on and on about Engy and I's matches for tonight, but this time isn't about us. It's about you. The American people. And more specifically, the 107 of you who are current or retired members of the AMERICAN ARMED FORCES!


Now this draws a pop.

Yep, that's right! I did my homework and was able to suss out each and every veteran in our audience tonight. And if nothing else, I want all 107 of you to know that your sacrifices and your trials will never be forgotten!

Madison and Engy applaud, and the sizable pop continues.

But words are cheap, and as you all know America isn't about words, it's about action. And I have personally ensured that all 107 of you esteemed guests here tonight are getting some action! [/b]

Engy rubs his hands salaciously behind Madison and licks his lips like some kind of creeper. Just then, a number of scantily clad women start coming down the walkways in the crowd. They break off and insert themselves into the audience.

[pink]Yes, that's right. I have paid for each of you to have a great time tonight! IT'S FREE BLOWJOBS FOR VETERANS DAY IN THE XWF!


The cameras pan across the crowds as the veterans in attendance are approached by the prostitutes. Many of them have family members with them, their wives looking on in horror or shielding their children's eyes. A few of the veterans are women, who just look confused and uncomfortable.

And no, I didn't forget you lesbian veterans either. Who needs a howitzer anyway, eh ladies?

Madison holds up her hand.

But that's not all! I also have a very special message for all of you from president Donald J. Trump!

The arena darkens and the main screen goes on. We see Donald Trump sitting in a golf cart on the grounds of Mar-a-Lago. He's wearing that typical smirk of his. He adjusts his comb over and begins to speak.

[orange]Hey XWF fans! I just wanted to stop by and say I hope you're all having the most amazing 4th of July ever. When Donald Trump thinks America, I think wrestling fans. And then I think of Russian whores, but then right back to wrestling fans. You people are the bread and butter of this country, it's beating heart. And I love you. Maybe even more than my own kids. Or at least more than the autistic one.

But I have a very important message to bring you on this, the anniversary of our country's birth. I need you all to not watch any news for like, at least the next 6 months. It's all fake anyway. I mean, Fox News is ok, but nothing else. Don't read any news either. But, who reads news in the first place? Probably just limp wristed egg head liberals.

Ok guys, have a great one. And remember, NO NEWS! [orange]

The Donald smirks and gives a wave as his clip ends. Madison has her hands to her heart.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I feel inspired! Anyway, have a great night everyone, enjoy the festivities, and remember....AMERICA FIRST!

"Amerika" hits the sound system again as Engy and Madison make their way out, followed by the secret service agents.





A recording plays on air, a lone voice with reverse echo effects hums an old church hymn.

"How long has it been? How many days has gone by, how many nights have children slumbered without their fear of boogie men?"

Images of various monsters flash as horror music shudders.

"I grow weary of Non-existence. Watching the light return from the shores of oblivion gave me, nay, US a new purpose. No longer are we teathered to the boundaries of these planes, but born fresh in the realm between.

The futility of it all is niche, the fighting, the words, the glory, and even the failures. It all succombs to the absolute. Good, Evil, right, wrong, black and white, meaningless concepts in the eye of the Beholders. This world as you see it is plagued with false zealots, wrong prophets, and mishandled flocks.

But WE are fair, knowing the masses desire that which none can't grant, mortal or divine. The one thing, the most coveted prize for all to seek. Not wealth, note love, not even fame holds a light to it. You cant obtain it through hard work, you won't find it in a ruin, and the answer doesn't lie in a book.

WE invite the XWF universe to witness truth. Experience with your own senses, what It's like to be.......


ABSOLUTE"[3 voices in unison]





Here we go, the kick off match for Warfare!

This should be a good one. What a way to kick off the first Warfare since High Stakes!

It's the flagship, I expect quality!



Tig O' Bitties: This match is set for one fall. It is the Dimenson of Fun Match. Introducing first, from Wicklow, Ireland.....Michael....McccccBrrriiideeeee!

You'll Never Beat The Irish By The Wolfe Tones hits over the P.A. system. Michael walks out, holding an Irish tradition hurt-stick, a Shillelagh! He walks down the ramp and to the steel steps and walks up them. Smacking the turnbuckle a few times with the Shillelagh, he enters the ring. Once at the top he stops and turns around and looks at the crowd and smirks before he steps between the ropes and leans back on the nearest corner, lights up a cigarette and waits for the match to start.

Dangerous weapon choice by McBride, it can do some damage!

Hey, I've always said Panzer looks like he's been beaten with an ugly stick, now he can actually be beaten with an ugly stick!



Tig O' Bitties: And his opponent, from The Psyche of A Broken Mind.......Phantom Pannnzzzeerrr

Phantom Panzer slowly walks out as the lights dim. Then they light up on the ramp only, and he walks out and as he walks along the lit ramp, blood seemingly follows his every step, coating the ramp. Behind him, dragging on the ramp is a giant hammer. The type you would use at a fair to make the bell go up as a test of strength. As he reaches the ring, the ring is lit up and before he enters, and as he steps foot inside the squared circle, the effect rushes from all four corners. After a minute, he throws his arms out fast upwards, and the lights brighten as bloodied confetti shoots out and into the crowd.

Creepy.

Awesome.

Both.

The bell rings and immediately, Panzer swings the hammer. McBride ducks, and fires a shot to the side of the knee of the big clown with the Shillelagh. Panzer goes down to one knee. McBride then hits Panzer in the face with the Shillelagh. He falls back onto his back but McBride is taken aback when he sees the clown laughing hysterically.

McBride gets angry and brings the Shillelagh down onto the midsection of the clown, who continues to laugh.

What is so funny?!

He likes pain! My god, he is enjoying a beating!

McBride's eyes go wide. Just then, Panzer kicks the legs out of McBride. Panzer is immediately back up and with a burst of unforseen speed grabs the head of McBride. DDT from Panzer that flattens McBride.

The clown laughs to himself and walks over to grab the hammer. McBride is beginning to stir. He kicks the Irishman in the ribs, rolling him over, then tries to bring the hammer down onto his head! McBride rolls out of the way at the last second. As he tries to roll out of the ring, Panzer grabs his legs. Bringing a leg up, he slams it knee first into the canvas. McBride grabs at it, and rolls around wincing.

Panzer grabs the leg and again slams it down hard on the mat. Twisting McBride around, Panzer grabs both legs, lifts McBride up and drops him face down onto the mat.

A laugh, then a cover.

1











2





McBride is able to kick out.

Panzer isn't done, however, and grabs the hammer again. Still not having gotten a clean shot in with the giant hammer, the crazy clown goes for the kill shot. Again McBride rolls out of the way and as the hammer collides with the mat McBride hooks Panzer under the legs and rolls him up.


1
















2











Panzer powers out. McBride gets up but ypu can tell that leg is bothering him. Panzer is up, McBride catches him and goes for a huge belly to back suplex.

Connects!

The hammer slides away as McBride gets an idea. He climbs to the top rope. Flying Headbutt!

McBride is on fire here!

These two guys have weapons at their disposal, legally, and we are seeing wrestling moves?!

McBride walks over and grabs his Shillelagh.

Here we go!

He brings it down onto Panzer's midsection.

Then again.


Then again.




And again.










Again.


The Irishman showing his temper as he brings the final Shillelagh shot down onto the head of Panzer, splitting him open.

McBride turns and sees the giant hammer that Panzer brought and his eyes go wide and his cheeks go red. He walks over and grabs the hammer.

Oh yeah! McBride is gonna squish the clowns head here like Gallagher!

And it is all legal!

McBride swings to bring the hammer down but the quick thinking clown locks on the gogoplta (hells gate) that he calls The Gag. The hammer is between Panzer's foot and McBride's throat. McBride begins to thrash around and we see a little blood dribbling from his mouth.

My god, he could shatter his larynx here!

Good!

You're sick.

I'm funny.

The official tries their best to try and get a signal from McBride, but his stubborn Irish ass just continues to gurgle and choke on his own blood. His eyes start to roll into the back of his head and the match is just about to be called when Panzer releases the hold!

Oh no, what now?

Clobberin' time, hopefully...

Luca is right as Panzer then grabs the hammer lying beside McBride. With two hands he pulls it back and then forward slamming it down onto McBrides head and through the ring!! McBride lies half in and half out of a hole the size of the outside diameter of that giant hammer!

What in the hell?! WHAT IN THE HELL?!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

The official stares down in awe at the mess in front of him. He looks at the time keeper and signals for the bell!!

I would say this one would HAVE to be over. I think he took McBride's head clean off with the one.

That or smashed it like a pumpkin...

The official has informed the time keeper that this match is being called as Michael McBride can no longer continue! The winner....... Phantom Panzer!!!!

We need to get some help out here...

Right, old man! We need this ring fixed! It's got an Irishman stuck in it!

Winner - Phantom Panzer


The lights go out...


...then they come back on...


and inside the center of the ring is Phantom Panzer...surrounded by the whole of BX3.

The Bitch Doctor pulls a big pipe out of his pants, no not that you scumbag, an actual metal pipe and while Panzer is focused on the handicapable Bilbo Bagins in front of him Panzer doesn't even see Reno take out both his legs with violent shots from the pipe.

Panzer slinks down to his knees and as he does so Reno and Blingsteen each attach a handcuff to his wrists and then to the bottom ropes to their left and right, effectively keeping Panzer on his knees, just where he likes it. Or so we hear.

Panzer is screaming in pain but also fighting desperately to get out of the cuffs.

It is at that point that Bruce Blingsteen and Josh Reno whip out their massive and I mean massive hunks of man meat and ram them into Panzer's ears as hard as they possibly can.

Panzer's eyes light up. Maybe due to shock, maybe because he likes it...

Who

The

Hell

Knows.

Bilbo does a wheely in his rocket aided wheel chair and then brings it to a complete stop. He then inches forward towards Panzer who then tries biting at Bilbo like some kind of rabies infested clown.

Despite being about a foot away due to the size of their respective meat sticks Blingsteen and Reno grab Panzer by the head and keep it centered. Which then allows Bilbo's awesome wheelchair to transform into some form of apparatus that allows Bilbo to "stand". Bilbo then rips his pants off and with the power of almighty Odin rams his muff marauder deep, deep into Phantom Panzer's throat, effectively face fucking the clown with everything he has.

This goes on for several minutes, possibly hours depending on who you ask and then...
















the lights go out...






















again......






















And when they come back on Dr. Psycho is standing in the room, metal chair in hand.




BING!

Blingsteen is down. That's probably a hate crime on account of Blingsteen being a Jew.




BONG!

Reno is down. He a bitch so he deserved it.


Dr. Psycho rears back with everything he has and nails Bilbo in the face which sends him rolling backwards, which allows his huge gash mullet to unfurl like some kind of cock muscle tape measure. It just keeps going and going until Bilbo smacks the ropes and falls forward right onto his face.

Dr. Psycho reaches into his pocket and pulls out some small bolt cutters which he then uses on the hand cuffs, freeing Panzer from what was probably the best experience of his life.

The Doctor turns around and walks to the back leaving Panzer in the middle of the ring to contemplate his life.







Tig O' Bitties: This match is set for one fall! Introducing first, from Dublin, Ireland, Maty Courage!

Helicopter by Bloc Party kicks in and the lights go out momentarily. A bright pink flash emerges from the X-Tron and Matty Courage has appeared on the stage with his back to the crowd. He is stood perfectly straight, the music volume increases as Matty Courage turns around with a fist bump. He claps the hands of as many fans as possible, before doing a lap of the ring, sliding into the ring and climbing to the top turnbuckle and raising both his arms in the air.

A lot of potential in this kid, I really like his game.

Well this pretty boy has his hands full tonight! The Savage Champion has come to Warfare!



Tig O' Bitties: Introducing next, he is the XWF Television Champion, Neville Sinclair!

As soon as Neville gets into the ring, he is ambushed. Matty Courage comes off the top rope with a drop kick. Neville's scotch glass and TV title go flying. He lands on his back as the bell rings.

Courage is on top of Neville, firing shots off, when the English man is able to flip him off of him. Matty is right back on him though, with a standing dropkick sending Neville into the corner. Throwing his hands up to some cheers he runs and hits a flying kick on Neville in the corner, stumbling him out to the middle. Coming off the ropes Courage clotheslines the TV champ, then bouncs off the ropes again with a lionsault.


Cover.




1






2



Neville gets a shoulder up.

Matty Courage is on fire here early!

I think Neville might be buzzin off that scotch, he needs to be careful!

Courage is back on Neville, whipping him into the corner. He goes for a running splash but Neville gets two knees up. Maddy stumbles back and Neville hits a clubbing blow to the back of the head. Neville shakes off the cobwebs a bit, and grabs Courage by the head. Spinning him Neville hits a swinging neck breaker. Courage doesn't stay down though, and is back up to his feet almost immediately. He runs into ANOTHER swinging neckbreaker and takes a hard bounce this time and rolls towards the edge of the ring. Sinclair chases him across the ring and lands a quick stomp to the back of his opponent's head. Courage wraps himself around the bottom rope which forces the official to back Sinclair off.

Matty Courage reaches his feet again and walks towards the center of the ring. Neville breaks for the middle as well, but is caught with a quick elbow to the side of the head. Courage pulls Neville with an Irish whip and sends him runing to a corner turnbuckle. Courage rushes in behind, but Neville pushed himself up in the air and basically leap frogged over Courage!

Neville rolls to his back and pulls Courage down with his legs quickly and tightly rolling him up!

ONE!!





TWO!!!








THREE!!!


Holy shit!

Wow, Neville Sinclair just pulled out a fast one! I guess he should get used to that as TV Champ now with those fifteen minute capped matches!

Winner - Neville Sinclair






Tig O’Bitties: “The following contest is a tables, chairs, and chairs match! It is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, weighing in at 320 pounds… from Boston Massachusetts, BARNEY GREEEEEEEEEEEN!!!:



"I Hope You Suffer" by AFI starts to play throughout the arena as fans start to boo loudly. Out walks Barney Green slowly. Green, dressed in a black shirt that just says "Green" in white lettering across the front, black shorts and black shoes, just walks down to the ring ignoring the fans as they start booing even more. He enters the ring and just stands in the corner as his music fades.

Tig O’Bitties: “And his opponent, weighing in at 220 pounds, and hailing from Toronto, Ontario, Canada… JAMES RAAAAVEN!!!



The entire arena slowly fades to black as the audience excitedly awaits the entrance of "The Peoples GOAT". The drum beat and guitar solo start and a series of white and blue spotlights come up and pan the crowd. Mike Shinodas voice is heard on the speakers singing.

“Now here we go for the hundredth time, hand grenade pins in every line, throw ‘em up and let something shine, going out of my fucking mind… filthy mouth, no excuse, find a new place to hang this noose, string me up from atop these roofs, high and tight so I wont get loose.”

By now the fans are going wild and cheering as the spotlights slowly make their way to the top of the entrance ramp where a dim fog begins to form.

“Truth is you can stop and stare, rub myself out and no one cares, dug the trench out and lay down there with a shovel up, out of reach somewhere… yeah, someone pouring in, make it a dirt glass floor again, say your prayers and stomp it out when they bring that chorus in.”

The spotlights come together as one, and the fog fills the top of the ramp until the downbeat hits and a major blue and silver pyrotechnic display goes off and the rest of the arena lights turn up to full. When the smoke clears James Raven is seen on top of the ramp, his hands thrown up over his head and a huge smile on his face.

“I BLEED IT OUT!!! Diggin’ deeper just to throw it away, I BLEED IT OUT!!!”

James makes his way down the ramp, high fiving fans and posing for pictures with several of them until he reaches the base of the ramp. Then, he pauses for a few seconds and sprints for the ring, diving in under the bottom rope and sliding in to the center of the mat on his hands and knees. He poses for a second, then gets up and runs for the turnbuckle, climbing up and posing yet again for the fans before doing a 360 degree spin off and doing the same on the opposite turnbuckle. As his music fades out he stretches in his corner, and then waits for the starting bell.

Raven and Green circle each other in the center of the ring. They both reach out to try and grab a wrist but are unsuccessful. Raven holds his arm out for too long and Green grabs on, twisting it into an arm wrench. Raven quickly reverses and moves into a side headlock. Barney backs into the ropes to push Raven off. Raven holds on and drops to one knee to stop the momentum. He holds the headlock tight, leaning back to keep the pressure on. Barney tries to lift Raven for a side or back suplex to counter the headlock but Raven hooks his leg to block. Green grabs hold of Raven’s wrists and tries to power out. The crowd boos as Barney is able to jab Raven’s eye with his thumb and pull his arms off his head and into the air. With both men's hands in the air above their head, Raven leaps and delivers a picture perfect dropkick that sends Green down to the mat. Raven quick to his feet while Green is slow to get up.

Old Man Johnson: “Raven using his speed and strength there.”

Barney makes it to his feet where Raven hits him with a kick to the stomach. Raven throws Green to the ropes and connects with a running crossbody as he comes off, but Barney catches him and out of the air and slams him to the mat!. Barney then crashes down onto Raven with a big elbow drop to the sternum! Barney rolls over, slow to get up due to his weight and the poor condition of his knees. Once vertical, Barney grabs Raven by the hair and pulls him up to his knees. Barney hits a couple of clubbing forearms across Ravens back before locking in The Green Dream!

Old Man Johnson: “Barney Green is trying to slow down James Raven, good plan!”

Luca Arzegotti: “Am I the only only who is surprised that Barney hasn’t used any weapons yet?”

Chazz Bobo asks Raven if he wants to submit but he doesn't. Raven hits the mat with his fist as the crowd cheers for him. Feeding off their energy, Raven battles back to his feet. Raven throws a back elbow that breaks the Green Dream. As Barney recovers, Raven spins around and takes him down with a discuss clothesline. Barney Green rolls to the floor outside the ring where he leans against the guardrail to catch his breath.

Old Man Johnson: “Barney to the outside in an effort to collect himself.”

Luca Arzegotti: “Collect himself? More like try to prevent his fat ass from having a heart attack! Chain Wrestling is not his forte!”

Raven rolls out of the ring and rushes straight to Barney. Green tries to cut him off with a big right hand, but Raven blocks it and unleashes a quick burst of punches that cause Barney Green to slide down the guardrail in a daze. Raven marches over to the ring and grabs a chair from under the apron and tosses it into the ring. Back under the ring, Raven pulls out a table and begins setting it up outside of the ring. Barney is starting to stir and manages to get to his feet. Barney creeps up behind Raven just as he finishes setting up the table. Raven realizes that he’s there and turns, delivering a punch that stuns and staggers Green. Green quickly shakes it off and charges forward, but Raven trips him up with a drop toe hold that sends Barney Green face first through the table!

Old Man Johnson: “James Raven just put Barney Green through a table!”

Luca Arzegotti: “I’m pretty sure that gravity did most of the work there.”

Raven rolls Barney back into the ring and grabs the chair, waiting on Barney to come to his feet. Barney makes it to his knees, and crawls over to the ropes, where he uses them to pull himself up. Raven continues to stalks Barney with the chair in him. Barney, now back on his feet, turns around. Raven tosses the chair to Barney, who catches it. Before Barney can react, Raven kicks the chair with a F.Y.S. Raven drops for the cover!










1!!!
















2!!!













BARNEY KICKS OUT!!!



Barney kicks out but keeps one leg under the arm of Raven and pulls down. He reaches over and has Raven in a crossface. Raven fights it and manages to get a hand up to his face, relieving the pressure. Barney releases the hold all together and rolls back along Raven’s body and catches him in an ankle lock. Raven tries crawling to the ropes but Barney pulls him back to the center.

Old Man Johnson: “I’m surprised! That’s actually some pretty good mat wrestling from Barney Green!”

Luca Arzegotti: “It’s sloppy and slow. I’m surprised by the fact that it’s even working for him, especially against a top caliber guy like James Raven!”


Raven turns and manages to use his free leg to send Barney crashing down to the mat. Both men get up but Raven is first and takes Barney over with a head and arm takedown. Raven uses his legs to put Green in a headscissors but Barney quickly kicks out of it and gets to his feet. Raven stands and turns right into a Green Awakening. Barney covers.














1!!!


















2!!!
























KICKOUT!

Raven rolls his shoulder up at the last second. Barney drags Raven over to the corner and quickly climbs to the top. He leaps with a big splash, but Raven has the ring awareness to roll out of the way! Barney crashes onto the match with a thunderous boom! Raven hooks the leg for a quick pin!









1!!!






















2!!!


KICKOUT!

Barney kicks out again.

Old Man Johnson: “Raven almost won it right there.”

Luca Arzegotti: “Good resiliency by Barney Green.”

Raven is a little slower to his feet, but still manages to beat Barney up. Raven grabs Green by the hair and pulls him up the rest of the way before whipping him into the turnbuckle. Raven rushes in with a knee to the midsection. Barney doubles over and stumbles out of the corner. Raven leaps in with Flight of The Raven!!!

Old Man Johnson: “FLIGHT OF THE RAVEN! THIS IS IT!!!”

Barney manages to push Raven off of him in mid air, causing Raven to drop to the mat! Raven quickly jumps back to his feet, but Barney catches him off guard with Intelligent Diversion!!!

Old Man Johnson: “Raven is gasping for air after that sickening throat punch!”

Luca Arzegotti: “Wait, Barney’s getting the chair!”

Barney picks up the steel chair and stares into it for a moment. Finally he turns his attention to Raven, who is still having trouble breathing, but is trying to get back to his feet. Barney screams for Raven to get up and smashes the chair into the mat. Raven gets to his feet and Barney stomps in behind him with the chair raised over his head. Raven turns around, seeing the chair he prepares for the inevitable, but Barney drops the chair and tries to hook in the Green Dream instead!

Luca Arzegotti: “What are you doing you fat fool!?!”

Old Man Johnson: “The fans wanted to see that chair shot, and Barney Green isn’t going to give it to them!”

Raven manages to slip out of the attempted Green Dream and reverses it into a Ravenlock!

Luca Arzegotti: “Not using that chair may have just cost him the match!”

Barney flails around the ring as Raven tries wrapping his body around the mammoth body of Green's!! Raven's legs swing back and forth as Barney tries bucking him off his back like an enraged bull! Barney begins to slow down rests in the corner with Raven still keeping the hold locked tight! Barney is fading!

Just then, Raven lets go and goes for the chair again! Barney has a stream of drool hanging from his mouth as he turns around to face his opposition and is bet immediately with that chair to his face! Raven strikes him once... Twice!! Three times over the head with the chair and finally after the third, Barney falls to his back! Raven with the cover!!!


ONE!!







TWO!!!!










GREEN KICKS OUT!

It's going to take a lot more than a couple of chairs to keep Barney down, Old Man...

I couldn't agree with you more, Luca!

Raven stands up and Barney follows right behind him.

Guy's got a hard fucking head...

Raven circles around the ring. As soon as Barney reached his feet and looked up, he side stepped across the ring going for his patented super kick!! The FYS (Fuck You Shank)!!! Barney dodges it and locks in the Green Dream!!!

Green Dream! Green Dream!! Barney's got him! Barney's got him!

Raven struggles through the move as Barney has him lifted where his feet aren't touching the ground! Raven manages to sneak and arm free, wraps it around Barney's head and swings his body out!!!

Flight of the Raven!!

Flight of the Raven!

Old Man Johnson and Luca say simulateneously as Raven covers Barney again!!

ONE!!






TWO!!!










THREE!!!!!

The winner of the match, James Raven!!

Barney Green definitely brought tonight.

He most defnitely did, Luca. Green had Raven scared for a minute, I could see it.

You so full of shit, Old Man.

Winner - James Raven






The scene cuts back to the locker room area. There is the people talking, and they sound frantic.

When the camera pans to them, we see it is Ezariaha. She has EMT's and XWF medical officials all around her. One of them is calling for a backboard and a neck brace. She has blood on her face and isn't moving.

Just as the backboard and brace arrive, we see Jenny step onto the screen.

She sarcastically puts a hand over her mouth with a gasp.

"Uh oh.....did wittle ezzy get a boo-boo?"

She smiles wickedly before shoving an EMT guy out of the way. She grabs Ezariaha by the hair and lifts her head.

"GET UP! GET UP EZARIAHA! YOU WANNA COST ME A MATCH HUH?!"

She slams her head back down on the ground.

Just as XWF security gets there she puts her hands up and says "....10 count.....bitch" and walks off the screen laughing as EMT's continue to work.

Back in the arena, the lights go pink and white as Sex Metal Barbie hits over the PA system.



Ugh, this bitch.

This is one tough broad for sure, but she doesn't have an easy task in this match!

I hope Madison brought her cream.

Tig O' Bitties: This is the Last Woman Standing Match! It is now one and one and set for one fall. The winner of this match will have to keep her opponent down for the count of 10.

Introducing first, from Las Vegas, Nevada, The Diva of the Damned, Jennyyyyy Myyysst!

Jenny steps out from behind the curtain at around the 20 second mark. The crowd is booing her for what she did to Ezariaha. Walking almost halfway down the ramp she looks at at kid with a MEZIAN, "You're End Is NIGH" tee shirt and taunts him.

[Image: qWmszdc.gif]


She hops up onto the apron and leans back over the top rope while lifting a leg. She then throws a leg over the second rope and and bends at the waist (Stacey Keibler or Velvet Skye Style). She pauses between the ropes while bent over, wiggling her ass a little, giving the crowd a nice show. Some men cheer but there is still a pretty mixed reactiob. She waves her backside back and forth a few times before kicking her leg up and finishing the step into the ring. She turns back to the side of the crowd that she entered on and shoots them a wink and slight smirk.



Tig O' Bitties: And her opponent, a member of AMERICA FIRST, Madison Dyyyysssooonnnn.

Madison walks out and has Engy on a leash on all fours.

She pulls back on the leash and Engy bucks up like a horse. She undoes the collar and he continues to crawl, following her like a lost puppy down the ramp.

When Madison gets to the ropes she looks at Jenny, who is staring a hole through her. She turns and waves off Engy, who crawls back up the ramp.

Madison wants this to be one on one I guess.

She doesn't want to give the handjob queen any excuses when she loses!

Remember, Nemesis is rumored to be in the building somewhere.

Good.

As soon as Dyson steps into the ring, Jenny jumps her. The bell rings as these two roll around, slapping and pulling hair. Madison is able to throw Myst off of her, but Jenny jumps back on top and continues slapping and punching at Madison in a fit of total bitch-rage.

Madison is again able to power Jenny off her, and elbows her in the face to back her up. Madison gets to one knee and Jenny charges again but the saavy and ultra conservative veteran delivers an uppercut that sends the blond bombshell staggering.

When Myst charges again Madison grabs her around the hips and spins into a huge spinebuster. Jenny arches up, holding her back as Madison laughs.

A few stomps to Jenny and Madison throws her hands up in a cocky fashion.

Picking up Jenny by the head, she whips her into the corner. Madison runs for a splash but Jenny jumps up, her legs over Madisons shoulders. Hurricarana from Jenny and Madison flips, sitting up.

Standing drop kick from Myst!

Jenny stumbles back and holds the ropes to catch her breath as Madison rolls on the mat, holding her face.

High energy and high emotion match here early on.

First class cat fight!

Jenny bounces off the ropes and lands a drop kick across the chest and neck of Madison. She immediately goes for the cover out of instinct but realizes this isn't a standard match. That little bit of hesitation causes her to catch a thumb to the eye from Madison who rolls her over onto her back. Spreading her legs she drops an elbow onto the lower stomach, crotch of Myst, who covers the area and winces in pain. Madison grabs her legs again and delivers another.

She needs to wash her arm now.

Stop it.

Madison goes a third time in the same maneuver but Jenny this time is able to kick her off and roll out of the ring. Madison gives chase. She grabs Jenny by the hair from behind and throws her head and shoulder first into the barricade on the outside. Madison is slow, calculated. She wants to take her time taking Jenny apart.

Walking slowly over she grabs Jenny again, who gets a punch into the mid section of Dyson, but it isn't enough as Madison runs and throws her into the other barricade on the other side. This time Jenny flips and lands back first. Madison again is slow and calculated.

Walking slow over to Jenny she goes to pick her up again but out of desperation Jenny slides out of the way, lifting Madison up and dropping her chest and neck first over the barricade as the crowd reaches out.

This gives Jenny some time to recoup, holding her back and wincing.

Madison is right back on the offensive grabbing Jenny's head and bouncing it off the announce table, sending her stumbling back. But she goes to tackle Jenny into the barricade and Jenny moves, grabbing Madison around the waist. BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX INTO THE STEPS!

MY GOD! How did Jenny pull that off!

Desperation! She said desperate people do desperate things! Madison was beating her pillar to post, she needed to do something!

Madison is grabbing at her back but isn't out. Jenny sees the opportunity to strike and runs, kicking Madison in the ribs and sending her side first into the steps. Jenny seems to be gaining a little confidence now as a smile crosses her face. A wicked grin. Picking up Madison by the hair she slaps her in the face but Madison shoves her. Jenny spears her and the two fall over the stairs. Jenny stands up, Madison doesn't. The ref begins his count.



1!







2!





3!




4!


Madison uses the ring apron to pull herself up. Jenny goes for a running knee but Madison grabs her and throws her back first into the apron. Jenny is enraged however, and bounces off, running at Madison who side steps and shoves her into the barricade. Jenny slups, but isn't down yet. She is now crawling on all fours but Madison runs, grabs her head and slams it onto the mat outside with a running bulldog.

Jenny is out!


1!








2!







3!



Jenny may be done here!

Let's hope!


4!




5!



6!



7!


Jenny uses the barricade to pull herself up. Madison sees this and goes to tackle Jenny. Jenny grabs here and the momentum sends the two of them over the barricade and into the Independence, Missouri crowd!

The men in crowd try to grab a feel of both before security gets involved.

The two are exchanging blows going up the steps. Jenny stumbles away from Dyson and the alt-right bitch throws her up the steps and through the double doors. Jenny crashes into the concourse.

Jenny is clammering to her feet and Madison kicks her in the side. She continues to follow Jenny, kicking her the entire time, until the two get to one of the merch tables. Jenny tries to prop herself up, Madison lunges, and Jenny grabs her..........FACE FIRST THROUGH THE MERCHANDISE TABLE! It crashes inward, with clothes and hats falling on top of Madison. Jenny steps back to catch her breath, wincing, and puts her hands up.

This may be over here.

You're correct.

I'm always correct.

Jenny smiles when she hears the ref get to a 6 count. She thinks she has it in the bag and turns her back on Dyson.

At the 9 count, she gets a clubbing blow to the back of the head. Madison is up! She has an XWF=CHAOS Tee Shirt and she wraps it around Jenny's neck and pulls.

Jenny flails her arms but Madison pulls harder!

She's choking Myst out with her boyfriends Tee Shirt!

Jenny's face is turning blue.

"PASS OUT BITCH! PASS OUT! WHERE IS DADDY NOW?! DADDY CAN'T HELP YOU NOW!"

Jenny is fading.

Once her face goes white.....Madison keeps pulling. Jenny is limp.

"COUNT!" She tells the ref. "I SAID FUCKING COUNT!"

The ref starts the count.


1!








2!






3!






4!




5!




6!




Just then Jenny springs to life and begins to flail again. Madison pulls harder. Jenny is able to get to both knees and flips Madison over her shoulder.

"I've been choked harder than that by myself!" she yells, kicking Madison in the small of the back.

Jenny's aggression doesn't last however as Madison uses her size to battle to her feet. She kicks Jenny in the gut and grabs her by the hair. She walks her with her.

"Let's take a little walk, cunt."

She walks Jenny through the crowd. She gets to the consessions line. Jenny is starting to wiggle.

She decides she can't hold her much longer and with a burst of strength throws Jenny head first into the popcorn machine! It crashes and sparks fly. Popcorn and hot oil fly. Jenny screams as the oil hits her but as the machine falls on her she goes silent.

OH MY GOD! These women are tearing up the arena!

Now they have to throw the popcorn out!

It touched the floor.....

It touched Jenny!


1!


2!


3!


4!



5!




6!



7!



8!

On the count of 8 a slightly burned and now greasy Jenny get to one knee.

Jenny just won't quit here!

She's doing this for Daddy!

Madison is shocked! A wicked look crosses her face as she grabs Jenny by the now stained hair and throws her out onto the concourse floor.

Jenny rolls across the floor. She sees a janitor coming over to clean the popcorn machine mess. She reaches for the bucket but Madison cuts her off. Madison Dyson shoves the janitor, takes Jenny by the head and dunks her into the mop water! Jenny's legs kick. She pulls her up then dunks her again!

But while he hand is undee she is able to grab the mop handle and whips it back, hitting Madison in the face and forcing her to let go.

Jenny comes up coughing. She picks up the mop bucket and puts it on Madisons head. Shoving her through the double doors again Madison tumbles down the steps. Jenny goes to one knee coughing and spitting out gross water. She is wincing, in clear pain. Madison rolls all the way down to the baricade down the stairs and stays limp.

MY GOD! Madison Dyson may have broken her neck! She just took a blind tumble down the steps!

She's fine.

Jenny makes her way down the steps. Still coughing.

She picks up a limp Madison and tosses her over the barricade and onto the mat on the outside.

The ref finally catches up, out of breath. That added time may have helped Madison.


1!






2!




3!


4!



5!





6!




7!






8!




Dyson to one knee!

Jenny charges and Madison drop toe holds her face first onto the steel steps!

Madison limps over and shoves Tigs off her chair and grabs it, folding it up. Limping back towards Jenny she holds the chair up over her head. She brings it down onto Jenny's back. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 times she whacks Myst with the chair. Jenny is puddy in her hands. Madison wants to end it. She limps over and rips the monitors out of the announce table and takes the top off. Jenny is on a knee and Madison throws the top at her.

Grabbing her by the hair she lifts her onto the announce table!

This has to be it here! Both of these women are spent!

"Dead Bitch Walkin!" She screams!

Just then Jenny comes to and knees Madison in the stomach.

PINK PERFECTION THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!

Myst hit pink perfection! But she is down too! Our announce table is shattered!

Dammit! Now where am I going to put my documents?!

Jenny Myst lies on her back and Madison Dyson lies on her face. Both flattened across the flattened annouce table. Myst rolls off the table top and across the mat on the floor towards the ring. She reaches tirelessly towards the ring apron then finally manages to get a grip on the curtain and slowly pulls herself up to one knee then to her feet.

I think that just knocked the wind out of her, Old man.

The referee begins the count!

ONE!!!

TWO!!!

THREE!!!!!!!

FOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Madison remains motionless on the table in front of the two announcers.

FIVE!!!

SIX!!

SEVEN!!

Jenny stands with a disgusted look on her face. She approaches the downed Maddy and starts screaming indecipherable, obscene verbals her way to the back of her head.

I think she just got the wind knocked out of her.. She cool

EIGHT!!

NINE!!!

TEN!!!

DING! DING! DING! DING! DING!

The winner of the match and the last woman standing.... Jenny Myst!!!

Jenny Myst after Pink Perfection on our table managed to pull this one off.

Pull it off, Old Man? Jenny Myst just proved she's the last woman standing the XWF right now.

Well, hardly so, but we've got lots more for you fans, stay tuned!

Winner - Jenny Myst






Theo Pryce sits at his desk shaking his tumbler and staring across his office toward Vincent Lane. Lane, sitting at his desk, wears one of those weird Russian hats and furiously mashes away on his keyboard.

Suddenly the door to the office bursts open and Thaddeus Duke enters. He looks at Lane for a moment, then over at Theo Pryce.

Nephew.

[duke]Uncle.[/duke]

Thaddeus closes the door and saunters over to Pryce's desk.

What can I do for you Thad?

Thaddeus stands quietly, nervously twiddling his fingers.

Would you like a drink?

[duke]Actually...[/duke]

Oh wait, you can't.

Thaddeus sits in the chair across from Theo and leans forward.

[duke]I need some help, I think[/duke]

Pryce swallows his last gulp of whatever he's drinking and stands up. After going over to the bar behind him to refill his glass, he turns toward his nephew.

What is it you need?

[duke]I'm missing something, and I really don't know what.[/duke]

Pryce retakes his chair and rolls forward, closer to his desk.

If you don't know what it is you need, then I have a difficult time figuring it out for you.

[duke]Well, I'm pretty fucking good in that ring.[/duke]

You are.

[duke]The fans, they love me.[/duke]

They do.

[duke]I give 110% every time I compete.[/duke]

Also true.

[duke]And I'm getting pretty good on the stick.[/duke]

You're not bad.

Thaddeus shrugs and leans back in his chair.

[duke]What the fuck am I missing? I was so close to the Universal title that I could fucking taste it. I could smell the leather. And as good as I was at High Stakes, it wasn't enough.[/duke]

No. It wasn't.

[duke]I really wanted that, Uncle.[/duke]

I know you did. And you were impressive.

[duke]There's something missing from my game and I'm at a loss here. I don't know what it is.

Will you help me figure it out?[/duke]

Pryce takes a swallow from his tumbler.

No Thad I won't.

Thaddeus dead stares Pryce. Lane even stops typing and looks up momentarily before returning to furiously updating his tinder profile or whatever it is he's doing.

[duke]I left Dolly Waters side, at YOUR request![/duke]

That is true. But it was as you said, a request. You didn't have to. You did it because you knew it was the smart play.

[duke]She was annihilated by Graves![/duke]

She was. But that was hardly your fault, or mine for that matter.

[duke]I did what you suggested because I thought it was the best way to thwart whatever those idiots were planning and got my ass kicked for it.[/duke]

Yes. And I was there to help you out at the end just like I said I would.

[duke]You're my Uncle.[/duke]

Obviously.

[duke]And you're not going to help me figure out what's missing from my game so I can become better than I already am?[/duke]

Let me explain my reasoning to you. I am not turning you down out of spite. This is not personal per say. But you and I both know that we don't have much of a relationship.

So really, you're more my brothers son, than you are my nephew.


Thaddeus stands up and starts to head for the door.

You're a smart kid, Thaddeus. You'll figure it out sooner or later. Despite what you may think, you don't really need me. Having said that, if my help is really that important to you then you need to repair your relationship with your father before I even consider helping you.

Thad shakes his head and exits the office. Lane looks up from whatever he's working on and stares across at Pryce.

Dick.

Scene fades.





Alright! We're back everybody and up next should be one hell of a match-up!

Peter always brings his game, Old Man. Jack Cain hasn't seen too many legends yet. Tonight could be a learning experience for him.



The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Queens, New York and weighing 328 pounds..... Jack Cain!!

Jack Cain starts to make his way to the ring, the XWF Universe all cheering wildly for the big man!



The lights in the arena dim, then go to full black.

[pink]And his opponent....


We then hear the eerie sounds of a bell being tolled and then an explosion of fire emitting from the entrance ramp. The beginning of COMANCHE by IN THIS MOMENT begins as the heavy guitar riffs kick in and red strobes dance around the stage.

From Los Angeles, California! Weighing in at 260 pounds..... Peter Gilmour!

As soon as the verse kicks in, we see Peter Gilmour and his wife Maria Brink come out to the ramp. They smile at each other before going down the ramp hand in hand. Peter bobs his head to the song. They get in the ring together and Peter gets on the turnbuckle and throws up an "X" sign as pyro goes off above the ring. Peter hops down and kisses Maria as they wait his next victim.

The match is now underway, with Gilmour and Cain not wasting any time in locking up! The bigger Cain gets the initial advantage, pulling him into a front headlock before dropping him headfirst into the mat with a DDT. Groggily, Gilmour pushes his face up off the mat and shakes his head before getting back to his feet. Cain during this time, has hit the ropes and is coming back with a huge running boot that Peter sees coming just in the nick of time! He ducks to the mat, and sweeps Jack's other leg out from under him, sending Cain back first into the mat! Gilmour writhes around on the canvas momentarily, clutching at his lower back all the while, before getting back to his feet. Cain is slowly getting up too.

Once again; Cain and Gilmour are staring each other down.

Gilmour goes for the tie up again, but Cain shoves him off and throws a left! He throws a right! Cain has Gilmour around the throat with one hand!

NO!

A kick to the gut and a powerbomb reversal from Gilmour! Cain crashes onto the mat! Gilmour laughs wickedly before spreading his arms out wide and shouting at the crowd. However, it looks like Peter might've underestimated Cain here; Cain is getting back to his feet and Gilmour's back is turned! He shakes out the cobwebs and comes right up behind Gilmour, dropping him on the back of his head with a Russian Leg Sweep! He transitions over into a full mount before dropping a steady hail of forearms down onto the face of Gilmour! After the seventh or eighth blow, Gilmour grabs onto his hand, tosses it to the side, and headbutts the man off of him! Cain is sent stumbling back, until he falls into the ropes and bounces off, running right at Gilmour!

Gilmour sees this coming however, and catches Cain with a huge Belly to Belly Suplex, sending him halfway across the ring! Gilmour with a cover!

1...










2...








Kickout! Gilmour jaws at the referee, holding up three fingers! He gets to his feet, hits the ropes and comes back with a huge leg drop that flattens the fallen Santos! He pulls Cain's head up and locks in a Dragon Sleeper! Jack Cain's arms flail wildly around as he tries to break free of this grip! Gilmour wrenches back, causing Cain to not only scream out in pain, but also deprives him further of oxygen! On one of the wild flails however, Cain connects with a gouge to the eyes!

Luca Arzegotti: This match has been frantic!

Old Man Johnson: It reminds me of Sammartino and Zbysco, 1977!

Luca Arzegotti: No it doesn't.

Gilmour loses his grip and stumbles back, clutching at his eyes. Cain, still a little dazed and confused on account of his sudden bout with oxygenlessness, stumbles around just as hard, seemingly unable to make out where he even is. Gilmour throws a wild punch, his hand still covering his injured eye, which Cain barely dodges due to tumbling towards the right place at the right time. Cain gulps for oxygen and comes forward with a huge right cross...

That misses wildly!

Luca Arzegotti: These guys are out of it!

Gilmour and Cain shake the cobwebs out finally, and stare each other down for the third time. Gilmour steps in to tie up, but Cain with a huge boot to the face of Gilmour! Gilmour spins, and Cain grabs him around the waist! Massive german suplex, and a bridge!

1...







2...







2.9...










GILMOUR KICK'S OUT! Cain is sitting on the mat, looking back at Peter Gilmour, who is barely moving. Cain gets to his feet, and goes to the opposite corner, waiting for Gilmour to get up. Gilmour does, and Cain launches himself with a huge spear at Gilmour! Gilmour counters! He spins aside as Cain goes headlong into the ring post, then sliding out of the ring! Jack Cain is kneeling outside leaning against the post! Peter Gilmour quickly slides outside, and shows everybody an evil grin.

Old Man Johnson: Looks like Gilly has bad intentions!

Luca Arzegotti: Even if they were good, they're still bad.

Pete rushes the post only to get nailed with the TKO!! The knockout punch from Cain! Pete bobbles standing for a moment before being tucked under the bottom rope back int the ring! Cain follows him and sets him up for the Blockbuster and NAILS IT!!

Cain with a cover!!

ONE!!










TWO!!!!



















THREE!!!!!!


The winner of the match, Jack Cain!!!

Cain just pulled off a hell of a win there!

Gilly no!!

Winner - Jack Cain






Jack Cain makes his way backstage after his match with Peter Gilmour. He’s sweating and breathing heavily as he bears the brunt of his punishing clash with the hardcore legend. He holds a towel against his forehead as he walks towards the locker room area.

A door suddenly bursts open from Cain’s left, and The Clone of Brock Lesnar appears, sprinting at him. Cain sees him at the last minute as The Beast lowers his shoulder and slams Cain against the concourse wall. He drives fists into Cain’s gut, who’s again been taken by surprise and struggles to fight him off.

Cain has enough presence of mind to smack his elbow into the back of Lesnar’s neck, stunning him. Cain, with the advantage for the first time since the two first came together, grabs Brock’s head and brings his knee firmly up into his nose. Cain advances, but Lesnar grabs him around the waist and lifts him over his head with a belly to belly suplex, sending Cain crashing to the concrete floor.

Lesnar is up to his feet and gets on top of Cain, MMA-style, and starts raining down punches onto his face, only to see his prey roar in defiance. Cain brings his arms up around Lesnar’s waist, and rolls to the side, smacking Brock’s head against the floor. Cain rolls clear, as does Brock, and the two get to their feet, then begin exchanging blows.

Lesnar’s punches are taking something out of Cain, but the taller man’s big right hand sends Lesnar reeling. Cain is on the clone in an instant, smashing his elbow above Brock’s brow, opening him up, and backing him up to wall with a series of uppercuts. Brock ducks the next blow, and spins behind him, attempting a German suplex, as XWF security pile in, grabbing him before he can lift Cain over his head.

Brock attempts to fight them off and Cain sinks to one knee. Lesnar erupts and sends security guards flying, and charges at Cain, only to run into a big boot clean across the jaw that sends him back against the opposite wall. Cain is about to follow it up before the security guards seize him, and and they hold back Lesnar too. The camera fades out at the two of them straining to get to one another as we go to commercial.





We see the camera pans towards Tig O'Bitties who is standing under the cage.

Tig O'Bitties: This Four Way Cage Match to determine The Hart Championship Contention. I would like to introduce a man who hails from Ohio, RL Edgar!



We simply see RL Edgar walking down to the ring with no music and possibly a dead crowd. He climbs into the ring and poses as he waits for next competitor.

Tig O'Bitties: The Second man in this match hails from Anywhere the Mississippi flows… CHARON!



The sound of glass breaking echoes throughout the arena as the lights cut to black like someone forgot to pay the electricity bill. A shrill noise comes over the speaker next, sending the crowd into a frenzy of annoyed booing.

"IT'S SO FUCKIN' DARK IN HERE.
COME COME FUCK APART IN HERE.
I DIE IN THE PROCESS.
YOU DIE IN THE PROCESS.
KETTLE DRUM ROLL HARD SHIT.
FUCK I SAID FUCKER DON'T START SHIT."

The beat drops after MC Ride's outburst and the lights come back on for a split second before cutting out again. The lights continue flickering to the beat as smoke billows from some unknown source and fills the arena. Charon, clad in a dirty, bloodstained denim jacket, tattered camouflage cargo pants, and old Doc Martens, stomps down to the ring. He slides under the bottom rope and rips the jacket off like a rabid animal before tossing it under one of the turnbuckles.

Tig O'Bitties: The third man in this match hails from Parts Unknown… THE ENGINEER!



The entire arena is washed in sterile white light as the following words are spoken through the sound system:

Is Dexter ill? Is Dexter ill? Is Dexter ill Is Dexter ill today?

Mr Kirk, Dexter's in school!

I'm afraid he's not, Miss Fishborne. Dexter's truancy problem is way out of hand. The Baltimore County school board have decided to expel Dexter from the entire public school system!

Oh Mr. Kirk, I'm as upset as you to learn of Dexter's truancy. But surely, expulsion is not the answer!

I'm afraid expulsion is the only answer. It's the opinion of the entire staff that Dexter is criminally insane…*echo*….insane….insane….insane….

On the main screen is a grainy image of an old television test screen. After the initial dialogue the sound slips into “Frontier Psychiatrist” by The Avalanches. As the offbeat tune picks up, the test screen fades and is instead replaced with a series of Rorschach ink blots. Each panel of ink blots at first looks innocuous, but soon slithers into the shadowy outlines of terrible scenes: a knife going through a head, a body with entrails spilling out before it, a bisected human torso, a figure whose face appears to be slipping off. Interspersed with the morphing inkblot tests are other images of rats flitting about in sewers and pictures of pleasant “whitebread” 1950’s families whose members have no faces. The white lights are now accompanied by small red lights panning all over the arena that look like droplets of blood in contrasts with the white lights.

The Engineer steps to the top of the ramp, his head ticking back and forth as he shoots the crowd paranoid, nervous glares and mutters to himself. He stalks to the ring and rolls under the bottom rope, whereupon he paces back and forth like a caged animal, still talking to himself, while he waits for the bell.

Tig O'Bitties: The Final Man in this match is a XWF Legend who hails from Ottawa, Canada… CHASM!



Made Of Scars starts playing on the pa system as smoke fills the entrance way. Chasm walks out and looks around the area. He smiles and starts to walk down to the ring ignoring the fans who are mixed between boos and cheers. He slides under the bottom rope and quickly gets to his feet. Chasm starts to stretch as he waits for his opponent to make their way to the ring.

All four man look at one another in the ring as Tig leaves the ring, and we see the steel coming down as the bell rings to signal the start of the match.

Old Man Johnson: Oh man this match will be action packed action with these four competitors trying to climb out the cage for a shot at the Hart Championship.

Luca Arzegotti: Yeah… yeah… who gives a fuck. I can sense that the only person who is viable to climb out the cage is Chasm.

Old Man Johnson: Come on Luca, you never know who will come out of the cage as the winner.

Luca Arzegotti: Whatever on with the match.

Chasm goes after RL Edgar with a flurries of punches as Charon taunts to Engy in a menacing manner, but Engy simply Eye Gouges Charon until he places him on the upper right turnbuckle and processed to choke him out with his boot on the throat. We see Engy taunting to Charon some more until Charon gives Engy repeated stiff forearms to the face.

Old Man Johnson: Oh man, Engy had the upper hand until he lost his guard.[white]

Luca Arzegotti: That what happens when you try to be wiredo on purpose, you get your ass beat.

Chasm then grabs RL Edgar and smashes him on the right side of the cage, then tosses him to the left side of the cage. RL Edgar is stumbling towards Chasm who hits him with a Belly To Belly Suplex. Then we see Chasm quickly climbing out of the cage…

[white]Old Man Johnson: I think you are right… Chasm might climb out the cage tonight.


Luca Arzegotti: I told you so, he has more experience than most of these three losers in the cage.

Charon grabs Chasm in a powerbomb position and slams him back to the mat. Charon then gives few stomps to the downed Chasm, as we see RL Edgar joining in the stompfest on Chasm. Engy takes notice and grabs RL Edgar head and impales his head on the steel cage wall. RL Edgar elbows Engy in the gut and Irish Whips him to the ropes and connects with a standing Dropkick to Engy. RL Edgar looks at the steel cage wall and attempts to climb it, gets low blowed by Chasm. Chasm hits a backbreaker onto RL Edgar. Engy and Charon hits a double Suplex onto Chasm and does another stompfest to Chasm.

Luca Arzegotti: Must be a stomp the Chasm night.

Old Man Johnson: It must have been the second time in the row they done it to him.

Luca Arzegotti: Well he can take a beating, look at his head!

RL Edgar gets up, clunks the heads of Engy and Charon, smashes both of their heads on the cage wall that knocks them down on the mat. RL Edgar picks up Chasm, but Chasm overpowers him with punches and hits a Enziguri that made RL be on one leg. Chasm then hits a Shining Wizard, RL Edgar ducks it and spears him and punches him on the mat. RL Edgar gets up and taunts, but gets cut off by Engy who bites him in the left arm. Engy keeps biting RL Edgar to the point he starts to bite on his forehead. RL Edgar gets pissed and gives a stiff headbutt to ENGY.

Luca Arzegotti: Engy is more insane than I thought. I like him.

Old Man Johnson: He’s lucky that he isn’t getting DQ for that.

Luca Arzegotti: Well Engy is a caged bastard… a political caged bastard none of the less.

Engy stumbles around the ring and RL Edgar hits the C.Y.N (Snap Gutwench Piledriver) to Engy which caused a major pop for the crowd. Charon hits a Release Dragon Suplex on RL Edgar. Chasm the climbs to the top rope turnbuckle and hits a Diving Spear to Charon. Chasm then flicks off the fans, but we see Charon crawl slowly towards Chasm. He bites him in the right leg and made Chasm kick him off like a dog. He bites again, but this time he lifts his leg and hits an Angle Lock with leg scissors wearing him out. Engy then preys on RL Edgar, and grapevine hold to the balls, RL Edgar does his own grapevine hold his balls until they both kneeled on the mat.

Luca Arzegotti: I’ve never seen two men gripping balls this hard in my life.

Old Man Johnson: These four men are unique in their own right on how to fight.

Luca Arzegotti: Well…

Charon sees the opportunity and climbs to the nearest steel cage wall, he manages to get on top of the cage itself. He wobbles for a bit, but manages to get his balance and he aims a Super Missile Dropkick on Engy AND RL Edgar off the cage! All three men are down and out, as we see Chasm gaining strength to stand on his feet… He walks over to another cage wall...

He begins his climb up the cage. Engy, taking a little less of the blow, begins to stir. He crawls to the edge of the ring and grabs one of the ropes and pulls himself up to his feet. He looks and Chasm is already half-way up the second cage. Engy looks do the door and frantically stomps over to it. He kicks it. Kicks it again.

It looks like the Engineer is trying to beat Chasm to the outside through the door!

That thing is locked tight, Old Man! It would take some fucking crazed maniac to be able to break through it just by kicking it!

Engy wraps his arms around the top rope and begins donkey kicking the door! One of the hinges break off as Chasm reaches the top and starts making his way down. With his back to the ring before, he didn't see Engy's attempts to escape! He picks up the pace as the other hinge flies off the door! Engy falls through the ropes back into the ring and dives to the outside!!

Wait a minute!

Oh shit! Charon got him!

Charon grabs ahold of Engy just as he attempts to dive to the outside through the broken doorway. Meanwhile, Chasm, from nearly ten feet in the air jumps from the cage and falls to the floor outside of the ring!!

DING! DING! DING! DING! DING!

The winner of the match and next in line for a Hart Championship shot...... Chasm!

Chasm lies on the ground outside of the ring after taking the long fall. Meanwhile, Engy pushes off Charon only to get drop kicked out of the ring by RL Edgar! The three men brawl in the ring as the show fades to a commerical!!

Winner - Chasm






This should be good, Old Man!

Right, Luca! A parade match for the Hart Championship! Our camera's are already outside catching the action! Hey! There's our Hart Champion now!

The XWF Hart Champion, Cadryn Tiberius, stands outside of the arena as an Independence Day parade is already rolling by him. He stands with the title wrapped around his waist with the official standing next to him.

Right, there's the champ, but where's the challenger?

I'm not sure!

A float then hops the curb and heads straight for Cadryn at a full 5mph! The official sees it coming and steps out of the way, he tries warning Cadryn, but it's too late!! It smashes it runs into him and shoves him on the ground, then runs over his already injured shoulder!!

Oh my God! Horrific!

The float hops over Cadryn's arm, breaking it again, and continues down the road with the rest of the parade until it stops off to the side. Paramedics rush out from the back and treat Cadryn immediately as the driver of the float reveals themselves to be non-ther than the Motherfuckers! Robbie Bourbon jumps out from the driver's side and BWP jumps out from the passenger's side. BWP laughs while Bourbon scratches his head and is like.... "Well, shit."

It looks like Cadryn is going to be unable to defend his championship tonight folks... But the official is counting it anyway!

Ain't that some shit?!

The winner of the match by count out...... Robbie Bourbon!!!





Winner - Robbie Bourbon






The following contest is an "I Quit" Match! Introducing first!



The words "FOLLOW ME" show up on the X-Tron screen as smoke billows at the entrance. Blue and white lights flicker. At the 10 second mark, he steps through the smoke wearing his jacket (Rated R Edge trench coat). Looking to both sides of the crowd. He walks slowly to the ring until he gets about 3/4 of the way down, then jogs and slides into the ring (edge style)...When he gets into the ring he gets up on the far turnbuckle and gets up on it, throwing both arms up.

From Clearwater Beach, Florida.... Chris Chaos!


The now familiar opening notes to "Ready Steady Go" by Paul Oakenfold begin to blast from the PA moments before the ring announcer plugs. The fans erupt. As the spiel is unloaded the lights cut, plunging the arena in darkness before silver strobes begin to flash and silver spotlights begin to continuously wave from along the length of the entrance walkway to the crowd and back.

And his opponent...

Obviously practiced and well-timed, the moment the announcer finishes, "ready, steady, g-g-go!" is let fly by the song's vocalist and silver pyro erupts from the egress. Before the cloud of smoke dissipates, the XWF Universal Champion and Ax3 founder Jim Caedus, strap over one shoulder, steps out as the house lights come up.

His hair hangs freely, emotion absent in his eyes. He glances around at the majority population of fans who now know exactly who he is. The small pockets of his smarks seem less enthused to be a part of the crowd but remain cheering nonetheless.

From Long Beach, California....... Jim Caedus!!!

As the music continues he turns his attention to the ring and it's inhabitant(s) then starts an unconcerned slow walk, carefully gathering his long blonde hair into a secured samurai-style bun along the way. At ringside he removes his Dickies jacket, folds it carefully beside his corner's steps, kisses and places the Universal Title lovingly upon it, then ascends to the apron, stepping through the ropes and into battle after nearly 2 minutes have elapsed.


The two stare each other down from the center of the ring before they begin to circle.

It's not the first time these two gentlemen have met each other inside the squared circle, folks.

Hell no! These two have a hell of a history!

Chaos heads to the center of the ring where Caedus meets him, but suffers a boot in stomach. Chaos throws him into the corner and starts unloading kicks and punches. Caedus takes them all eventually grabs Chaos and reverses his position! Chaos gets thrown in the corner and Jim starts unloading on him! Punches and kicks, until the official cuts between the two!

Obviously the official is trying to get some order in this match up early!

Yeah, you know this two have a hard-on for each other, Old Man! This ain't gonna be good!

Chaos rushes out of the corner and nails Caedus with a forearm that blind-sides him into the ropes! Caedus rests agasint the top rope and Chaos rushes over, he leaps over the ropes as he grabs Caedus's head, and snaps Caedus head through the ropes in a hideous looking neck breaker!

Caedus's head springs back as Chaos lands on his feet to the outside. He slides right back into the ring and rushes after Caedus only to get an elbow to the jaw!

The two of these men must know each other so well now, it'd be impossible to get the upper-edge!

The two breathe heavily as they stare each other down again from opposite sides of the ring. Caedus has a look of determination in his face.

Jim Caedus has just lost his Universal Championship in one of the worst ways anyone could, a cash-in from someone who didn't exist.

Blingsteen exists, Old man!

Caedus tries a swift kick, but Chaos dodges and nails Caedus with a clothesline! Chaos slaps the mat and makes his leave under the bottom rope and stick his head under the ring!

What's he looking for?!

I'm not sure, Luca. Can't be good!

Chaos pulls two steel chairs and a baseball bat from under the ring and throws them inside. Caedus is back to his feet and grabs the baseball bat right away and swings it over the ropes towards Chaos but misses!

Chaos backtracks a bit and grabs a chair from inside the time keeper's booth and folds it up. Jim Caedus remains in the ring for a moment before he makes his way to the outside, still holding the baseball bat. He chases Chaos around the corner, who doesn't move, and meets Caedus with a clash of both weapons the two men possessed!

Clash!

Clash!

Clash!

Caedus screams aloud and with a final blast slams the chair out of Chaos's hands! Chaos stands armless for a moment before just diving into Caedus with a spear!

Oh! Chris Chaos just speared Chaos into the steel steps!

Had to hurt, Old Man!

Chaos grabs Chaos by his hair and lifts him to his feet before throwing him back into the ring. He follows behind and drops an elbow as he reaches his feet and points to the referee as he applies a headlock!

The official checks in and Caedus screams out "No!" before they even get comfortable! He works his way back up to his feet and buries an elbow into Chaos's gut then bouces his opponent off the ropes sending him to the other side! Chaos bounces off and gets nailed with a spinning back fist!

Purgatory Punch!

Ouch!

Caedus knocks Chaos out with a huge Purgatory Punch as he crosses the ring afer the Irish-whip! He picks Chaos up immediately and suplexes him back down with a german suplex! He points down to Chaos telling the offical to check on him!

I'm pretty sure that neither of these men are planning on saying "I Quit" tonight. This is going to be interesting!

Caedus grabs Chaos and pulls him under his arm and lifts him up. He throws his arm up over his shoudler and tries for another suplex, but Chaos denies him! He pulls his weight back and doesn't go anywhere. Chaos hooks around Caedus leg with his own and pulls his weight more followed by a knee to his stomach! Chaos reverses the move and pulls Caedus down with a vicious DDT! Caedus's head smacks hard off the mat and the two lie flat on the mat! Chris reaches over and pulls him in into a tight cross face!! He pulls back hard as the official checks in close!

Caedus fights and fights off the hold from the center of the ring! He crawls towards the ropes and finally manages to get a grib where the official forces Chaos to break it!

Like I said, you're going to have to kill one of these men in order for them to give up in this match!

How are they going to give up if their dead, Old Man?!

The move is broken and Chaos reaches his feet and plants strong boot into the back of Caedus who rolls out of the ring and back onto the floor! Chris steps to the outside of the ring where he was throwing the chairs out from before and grabs one on his way by. He reaches the side where Jim is just getting to his feet and plants it across his skull! He sets the chair down and grabs Caedus and throws him into the barricade! Jim doesn't take it well and falls over it to the other side! He reaches his feet, but Chaos is on the ring apron waiting for him and jumps from their into the crowd with a cross-body! Chairs and people fly everywhere as the collsiion happens and the two men lie motionless outside the ring area! The official climbs out to the outside to check on both men, but their resiliency beat the referee and they were already to their feet battling it out again! Chaos sends a stiff kick to Caedus's midsection, but it's caught, but he flips around and hits him with a mix of a scissor kick and an enziguri! Chaos's foot smacks against the side of Chaos's head and he falls like a tree into another row of empty steel chairs! Chaos grabs him as he lies leaning against a couple and Irish whips him back towards the ring where he topples over the ring barricade once again!

Chaos follows him over and grabs the same chair he was beating on Chaos with before. He wides up and takes a quick punch to the gut from the weakened Caedus. Another, and another. Chaos retalaliates by jabbing Caedus in the stomach with the chair and follows up with a swift swing down across the back! Caedus takes a knee, but is sent the rest of the way back down with another slam of the chair!

Chaos throws the chair aside and grabs Caedus by the back of the head and throws him back into the ring followed by the chair. He climbs to the apron, grabs the chair close by, and climbs to the top rope! He measures up Caedus before he reaches his feet and dives off the top!

WREXUS PLEXUS through the chair! Caedus managed to sneak one in! A huge, mid section breaking kick to that chair just sent Chaos flying back into the corner from mid-air! He bounces off the corner and into Katabasis!! Chaos lands on his head and Caedus basically throws himself into a position to apply HYB (Hold Your Breath)!!! Caedus cranks on the hold for just a moment before the referee checks in, there's no response..... He rings the bell!!

Chaos never said he quit!

I know! Bullshit, Old Man!

The official checked in and seen Chaos was knocked out cold from the Katabasis and called the match before any more damage could be done!

But it was an "I Quit" match, Old Man! That fucker didn't quit!

The winner of the match, Jim Caedus!!

Caedus rolls off his opponent as the bell rings and heads straight to the outside without the referee officially granting him the victory. He fire in his eyes still, Caedus makes his way up the ramp.

Winner - Jim Caedus












Slowly, the cage from earlier starts to drop back down from the ceiling, lights panning off it to highlight the drama.

And we've come to our penultimate match of the evening!

Ohhh, “penultimate.” Somebody's been using the word a day calendar I got them for Christmas.

That was three Christmases ago actually, but it was a fine practical gift nonetheless.

So here's how this clusterfuck works. Both men will be trapped in the cage. There is no escape, no pinfalls, submissions, or disqualification. The first one to pull down their flag from atop the cage wins the X-Treme championship, currently held by Thaddeus Duke.

The flags are now being mounted in the cage. Naturally, Bearded War Pig has an American flag, and Duke has an Illuminatus flag. Tig is also standing by in the ring.

And now for tonight's main event. It will be for the XWF X-TREME CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, the challenger....



As his music hits, Bearded War Pig explodes out of the bag. He first jogs in place, psyching himself up at the top of the ramp. He's wearing red white and blue themes wrestling gear with “America, Fuck Yeah” embroidered on the back. With a feral cry he bolts into the ring.

....he hails from Lake, Michigan and weighs in at 212 lbs....BEARDED WAR PIG!

Pig paces beneath the flags, looking seriously geared up for this contest.

And the champion.....



Silence.


Darkness.



GUITAR! White light bursts through the darkness pointing straight up from the ring posts illuminating the vertical Illuminatus Iron Cross banners (white field, blue cross,) hanging from the lighting rigging above each corner of the ring. More guitar, the screen flashes to behind the curtain where Thaddeus is shown wearing a white Dolly Waters, Revolution Prime hoodie with the hood up, rocking back and forth in anticipation and excitement. The Xtreme title slung over his shoulder

Back to the mostly darkened arena. 'OKAY,' the arena lights pop on, strobing in blue and white colored lighting with Thaddeus Duke, hood up, standing on stage not moving. 

GUITAR WINDS UP, CHORUS: The crowd cheers as he throws off the hood and walks to either side of the stage, pointing out toward the fans. He backpedals toward center stage and then heads toward the ring. Once he can reach fans, he slaps hands old school style, going from side to side. He runs up the steps and pauses, looking at his admirers before hopping over the top rope into the ring. He makes his way to each corner, giving the Bret Hart "I love you" pose with the Xtreme title held high. Once all four corner are done, he hops back to the outside and takes selfies with fans at ringside. Mostly kids and teens.

....he hails from Saybrook, Connecticutt and weighs in at 210 lbs....your XTREME CHAMPION, THADDEUS DUKE!!

This is sure to be a barn burner folks. Both of these men have military minds, so they're natural strategists. And in a match like this, you could certainly argue that strategy is king.

Oh for God sakes, they're grabbing a flag, it's not rocket surgery.

Both men reluctantly back into their respective corners, neither taking their eyes off the flags atop the cage. Then, the bill rings and things get underway!

Both men charge at each other, with Pig going for a huge lariat. Duke floats over to try to counter it into a DDT, but Pig tosses him off. Duke lands on his hands and knees and as Pig comes over he leaps up and goes for a dropkick. Pig bats him aside. Duke rolls away but Pig catch him and deadlifts him up. Duke floats over and tries to german suplex him, but Pig blocks and throws back an elbow. Duke ducks and instead gets his arm around Pig's throat to reverse DDT him. But Pig twists their bodies around so that he is instead in a position to suplex Duke. Pig lifts Duke up for the Suplex but Duke floats back, and lands on his feet. Both men, shocked at the quick pace of those reversals, back off!

The fans give both men a nice pop!

Reversal after reversal, but somebody's gotta land a hit eventually.

Just then, Duke launches himself at the cage and starts to climb! Pig follows him, grabbing him about the waist band and pulls him off, but Duke turns around in midair and gives Pig a big forearm shot! Pig stumbles and Duke follows it up with a swinging neckbreaker, followed by a big legdrop. He goes back to the cage and gets about half way up before Pig is on him again. He gets up and under him, putting Duke on his shoulders and electric chair dropping him off the cage!

Pig waits for Duke to rise before clobbering him with an overhead punch, followed by a an uppercut elbow. He goes for another elbow but Duke slinks aside, grabbing Pig's leg to try a single leg takedown but Pig instead grabs Duke's head and tossing him back with a suplex. Pig holds on and lifts Duke back up again, this time tagging him with a few knees while keeping him locked down before spinning him out with a big time sweeping neckbreaker. Pig then runs to the ropes and hits a spring board moonsault on Duke! Pig goes for the pin but immediately curses his foolishness.

That's a tough instinct to break!

With a breather, Pig looks up at the flags, considering the cage and the quickest way to get up to them. Duke is slowly rising to his feet and Pig approaches to go back on the assault, but Duke rolls past him and tags him with a big flying roundhouse. It doesn't keep Pig down for long and Pig goes to rush him again but Duke looks like he's about to go for his Better Than You superkick and Pig catches himself. Duke tries to recover by going for a lock-up and pushing Pig back against the cage, but then Pig reverses the momentum and gets Duke up against the cage. Duke hits a couple low kicks to Pig's calves getting him to break the hold but then Pig suddenly grabs hold of Duke's head and rams him headfirst into the cage!

And now things get interesting!

The cage itself finally entering play here!

Duke is clearly staggered by the blow. Pig gets in close and throws the champ around with a judo toss, which he then parlays into a front face lock. Duke fights to his feet however and elbows out. Duke then grabs the front of BWP's trunks and pulls him face first into the cage! Not wasting any time, Duke then follows up with a big senton splash to Pig's back, and then waits for him to arise before tagging him with a side russian leg sweep, followed by a big elbow drop. Duke then rockets up to the top rope in only a few steps and takes off with his Mother of All Bombs!!!

But Pig rolls out of the way and Duke wipes out!

Ohhhh! That could have been the first big mistake we've seen!

Obviously BWP thinks so too, as he has started to climb the cage.













SNAP!









BETTER THAN YOU FROM THADDEUS DUKE!

He gets the leg hooked this is probably over!


After the chin music to War Pig, BWP lies flat on his back near the center of the ring, while Thaddeus has lost his footing and fallen to his knees. He stays there on his knees for just a moment before using the ropes to get him back to his feet. Duke slingshots himself to the top turnbuckle and leaps as high as he can, wrapping his hands on the top rail of the cage.


What the hell is he doing?

I'm no rocket surgeon, Johnson, but it looks like he's climbing the cage.


Duke pulls himself to the top of the cage and perches himself at its corner as he measures the distance from himself to BWP. He rises slowly to a fully upright position and points to the sky with both hands. He then leaps into the air...



















TOO SWEET TO BE SOUR!

SHADES OF THE MACHO MAN!


Duke nails the Savage elbow onto Bearded War Pig and hooks the leg.


1...
























2...
























3!

Duke has done it!

That'll do it, Old Man!

What a night folks, we'll see you in two weeks!

Winner and STILL XWF X-Treme Champion - Thaddeus Duke








OOC:

SORRY FOR THE DELAY THIS WEEK. WITH THE HOLIDAY, I HAD THAT PLUS WORK TO DEAL WITH.... I'D LIKE TO THANK ALL OF THOSE WHO HELPED OUT. WITHOUT YOU, I'D STILL BE TAPPING AWAY AT THIS STUFF. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE, THANKS BUNCHES.
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(07-08-2017)
Prof. Bobby Bourbon Offline
Mad Scientist



XWF FanBase:
The 'cool' kliq fans

(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty while setting the trends)


#2
07-07-2017, 06:00 PM

Steve Sayors and the crack XWF production staff have caught up to Robbie Bourbon, going 5 mph leaving the parking lot of the Silverstein Eye Center Arena, a line of traffic behind him since he's doing a meager 5 mph. Steve briskly walks alongside the vehicle.

Robbie Bourbon! Do you have anything to say about what happened here tonight?

Robbie slaps the exterior of the parade float, which is just about visiting your dentist. Local dentists are atop the float along with a bevy of signs promoting good brushing habits and the importance of flossing. He puts the pedal to the metal and the basic sound of a lawnmower moter does its thing.

I've got a new Bourbon Assault Vehicle, Steve. Barney Green blew up my first van. Michael Graves stole my second. Now, I'll be cruising under deep cover wherever a parade is being held. Hell, I might even hold my own parades!

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Chris Chaos Offline
Corporate Chaos



XWF FanBase:
Very random

(heel alignment but liked by many; has earned respect despite breaking the rules often)


#3
07-07-2017, 06:38 PM

[Image: AVaDg3y.jpg]

Backstage Jenny can be seen pouting. She is obviously concerned about the condition of her valet, teammate and boyfriend Chris Chaos. He is being helped to the trainers room to be looked at by the medical staff. But he is not going easy. Kicking boxes and chairs on the way, they escort staff does their best to contain him. Jenny looks like she is about to cry. When he gets close enough she runs over and hugs him.

"Oh my god. I am glad you are okay!"

Chaos spits behind her, at the ground.

"I DIDN'T QUIT!" he yells with venom in his voice. "THIS WAS AN I QUIT MATCH AND I DIDN'T QUIT. CAEDUS DIDN'T BEAT ME!"

She lets go of the embrace.

"I know, babe, the ref stopped it. He was concerned for your safety!"

"GET HIM BACK HERE NOW! HE IS REVERSING THAT DECISION! THIS IS NO CONTEST!"

"Hun, relax. You'll have another shot. Let's focus on Savage. Put it behind you."

The escort staff drags him into the trainers room and the door shuts. Jenny leans back against the wall, pouting more, with a little wince from her match. After a deep breath, she enters the training room and XWF Camera's can pick up Chaos still screaming about not losing.
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JackCain (07-07-2017)
JimCaedus Offline
Trash Talker Skywalker



XWF FanBase:
Mixed

(loved by some; hated by some; dips between clean/dirty)


#4
07-07-2017, 06:47 PM

Mere moments followin' the cut-away to Cuck and his husband Myst's lockeroom, despite my best efforts to avoid 'im in passing, Steve Sayors catches me with a hand on the shoulder.

"How about you, Jim? Any parting-"

I silence Steve with a dead eyed gaze I then level at the lens.

"Chaos...kudos on the hustle and struggle. Also, fuck you."

With that I'm off...

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Shout out to Gator/Noah Jackson for this kickass banner

[Image: aFZyFWU.jpg]



~XWF ALL TIME TOP 50 - #6!!!! <3
~Efed Podcast Top 100 - #74 w/no Twitter (all credit to you, fam, 🙏 <3)
~XWF UNIVERSAL CHAMPION - 2x
~XWF XTREME CHAMPION - 2x
~XWF TAG TEAM CHAMPION w/Chaos then Engy, w/APEX x2 - 3x 
~XWF 24/7 Briefcase - 3x
~XWF Trio Tag Champion w/Ax3 - 1x
~XWF Television Champion - 1x (undefeated)
~XWF Federweight Champion - 2x
~XWF Triple Title Holder - 1x (TV, Federweight & 24/7 case)
~XWF Double Title Holder - 5x (TV/Fedr, Uni/Trio, Tag/24/7, X/24/7 & Uni/Tag)
~XWF 2017 Lethal Lottery IV Tournament winner!!
~XWF 2017 Leap of Faith Rafter Match winner!!
~XWF 2017 2nd Annual Doc D'Ville Shove-It Rumble Co-Winner w/Chaos!!
~XWF 2017 War Games Co-Winner with Rob Main & Drew Archyle as APEX!!
~XWF Feb. 2017 J. Federweight Scramble Winner!!
~XWF January 2017 RP of the Month!! - "Like a Moth to the Flame"
~XWF February 2017 Star of the Month!!
~XWF March 2017 3-Way Star of the Month!!
~XWF September 2017 RP of the Month!! - "Lions & Tigers & Caedus, Oh Shit"
~XWF July 2021 QOTM!! - line from "Took It All"
~XWF October 2021 RP of the Month!! - "This Just In" audio
~XWF November 2021 Star of the Month!! (3rd time!!!!!!)
~XWF Match of the Year 2021 w/Bourbsy!! - X-Treme, Flynn's Audio Shove-It


---Love Me, Like Me, Hate Me. No Worries---

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JackCain (07-07-2017)
Barney Green Offline
Back In Black



XWF FanBase:
Traditionalists

(has an old school wrestling mentality; no nonsense; less appealing to some younger fans)


#5
07-07-2017, 07:31 PM

Dear James Raven,

You don't need to worry about me anymore.

-Barney Green.

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Dr.Psycho Offline
The Demon Doctor



XWF FanBase:
Men, some teens

(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty)


#6
07-07-2017, 10:26 PM

Sayors and company in a rare event catch Dr. Psycho who still has the steel chair in hand

They ask why he helped Panzer to which he responds
Why did I Help Panzer you ask?
The answer in three parts is quite simple my boy

"Blingsteen is a wannabe Million Dollar Man only his actual net worth is likely a million pennies why else does he continue to hold the Universal Title Ransom for money?

Reno the Bitch Doctor is just that..a bitch who's all bark and no bite like a Chihuahua that won't shut up,

and Bilbo......got what he deserved from his last encounter with Panzer.

Panzer may be strange but one cannot deregate or deride the talent of the man who tonight likely left Mike Mc Bride. In traction for a good while but he's an Irishman he's tough he'll be on the mend!

Panzer on the other hand looked as if he needed a little help evening the odds that were clearly favoring his ending up the same way as poor Bilbo #sorrynotsorry to him (Bilbo) In the aspect and so I was just there to see that didn't happen!

and if those BX3 bozos want to try again with their stunt I'll be glad to Dissect all 3 of them one by one piece by piece and send them all to emergency surgery in order to put those three humpty dumpty stooges back together again!"

With that Sayors thanks Psycho for his time.


[Image: DrPsycho.png]

Record. 3 and 2

2X HEAVYMETALWEIGHT Champion (7-6-17) (7-16-17)

Personal STIPULATION: Dragon House Match
Pm me for details on it
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Peter Fn Gilmour Offline
the man with the SUPER DICK



XWF FanBase:
Hardcore, psycho fans

(cheered for breaking rules and bones; excessively violent; creative with weapons)


#7
07-07-2017, 11:32 PM

ooc; BS win for cain there. i think my rps were way better.. but whatever even my best work still goes unnoticed around here.

*Peter walks away flipping ppl off after a fluke win by Jack Cain*

[Image: yPandTo.png]

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion
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Thomas Nixon (07-08-2017)
Dr.Psycho Offline
The Demon Doctor



XWF FanBase:
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(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty)


#8
07-07-2017, 11:49 PM

(07-07-2017, 11:32 PM)Peter Fn Gilmour Said: ooc; BS win for cain there. i think my rps were way better.. but whatever even my best work still goes unnoticed around here.

*Peter walks away flipping ppl off after a fluke win by Jack Cain*

Welcome to my world Peter....



I feel your pain trust me


[Image: DrPsycho.png]

Record. 3 and 2

2X HEAVYMETALWEIGHT Champion (7-6-17) (7-16-17)

Personal STIPULATION: Dragon House Match
Pm me for details on it
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Theo Pryce Offline
King of Kings
Management Lv. E-Rex



XWF FanBase:
The 'cool' kliq fans

(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty while setting the trends)


#9
07-08-2017, 07:17 AM

Eat a snickers Pete. You get cunty when you're hungry.

[Image: XCwEiv2.png]
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Vincent Lane Offline
Rock n' Rolling XWF Owner and Megastar
*********
Administrators



XWF FanBase:
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#10
07-08-2017, 07:20 AM

*swats Gilly on the nose with a rolled up newspaper*


You know better than to complain about a loss like that, Pete. I'm always willing to give you feedback, etc., and let you know where the judges were coming from, but don't insult others' work like that.

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Peter Fn Gilmour Offline
the man with the SUPER DICK



XWF FanBase:
Hardcore, psycho fans

(cheered for breaking rules and bones; excessively violent; creative with weapons)


#11
07-08-2017, 10:20 PM

Suck my dick!

[Image: yPandTo.png]

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion
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John Holliday
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XWF FanBase:
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#12
07-08-2017, 11:46 PM

(07-08-2017, 10:20 PM)Peter Fn Gilmour Said: Suck my dick!

"But, why?" John asked in a confused tone. Why would anyone want to suck this Peter Gilmour's dick? It made no sense to John. No man, let alone a woman would ever want to wrap their mouth around Peter Gilmour's cock. He sure as Hell didn't have the swagger of Tyrion Lannister. This only meant one thing, that Peter Gilmour wants his dick sucked so much, is because he's really a virgin. Yes, that had to be it. Only virgins acted the way he was. Damn, that poor sumbitch.
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