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Thomas Nixon · (05-26-2017)

Cadryn Tiberius is a great wrestler. The first time I watched him wrestle, I was genuinely impressed. Cadryn almost accomplished something that I have failed to do twice. I watched him hoist Jim Caedus into the air and connect with the Italian Driver, and I thought he was the new Television Champion. I was shocked. I lost to Jim twice. He countered my victory roll into a pin of his own, and he nailed me with the Katabasis to put me away.

I thought Cadryn had done what I had failed to do, and whenever I’ve seen Cadryn since then, I think of the man that almost dethroned Caedus. But that’s such a serious, one sided view of Cadryn. Now that I’ve sat back and watched him talk, watched him make a fool of himself in his promos, and watched him settle down and act serious, I have a whole new opinion on him. Well, maybe not an opinion, because I’ve made a conflicting observation.

Cadryn has become a man that wears many hats. Sometimes he’s wearing the hat of a jester. He pledges his allegiance to the kings, and he is routinely mocked. He’s the joke of the group, and he plays the role to a tee. For example, Cadryn may be in his bathtub in a straight jacket and clown make up. He may be talking to ‘Theo’, a sock on his erect penis.

But then, Cadryn puts on the ‘Essence of Excellence’ hat. Despite making himself into a fool moments before, Cadryn takes himself seriously. He talks up his skill, his experience. He acts like a no bullshit guy that doesn’t play silly games. He goes out and puts on a close, intense match and then wants people to shake his hand to show respect.

Then Cadryn has another hat, I’ll call it his virtue hat. Cadryn got all high and mighty because he thinks he is well intentioned. He fights for a paycheck! He fights to put bread on the table! And since I, Thomas Nixon, have other motivations, he acts like he’s the one in the right. He’s taking the moral high ground because he thinks of himself as some blue collar worker. He’s romanticizing the struggle of putting money on the table, like he’s a better person because he provides for others and has to make ends meet, but there is nothing inherently virtuous to living paycheck to paycheck. A hard life doesn’t make you a better person than anyone else, but Cadryn would disagree.

There is a problem to being a man of many hats. He is actively undermining his credibility and hurting his perception. You get caught talking to a sock on your dick and then cut into a serious monologue about values. There’s an inconsistency there, but I think that stems from something serious that I don’t want to joke about.

It’s as if Cadryn Tiberius is ailing from a severe mental illness. So before I continue, I would like to say a word on that. I told Mezian the same thing, when I became worried that he was schizophrenic, and I’ll tell Cadryn this too because he may very well have multiple personality disorder. Cadryn, the XWF gives us a pretty solid employee benefit package, probably because they don’t want us to sue their ass every time something batshit crazy happens. You can go get help; you can go see somebody that will listen to your problems. They will talk you through these issues, and if that doesn’t work, they medicate you until you become one coherent individual.

Right now, you’re ranging from a crazed autist that keeps your cell phone up your ass to a no bullshit guy that doesn’t want to be taken lightly. I think there are neurons in your frontal lobe that aren’t firing right. Maybe a chemical imbalance that a prescription can fix. The fact of the matter is that you aren’t healthy. And getting into the ring won’t do you any good.

When I say that, I’m not tooting my own horn. I don’t think you should be getting into the six man tag match next week. It’s unsafe. Sooner or later, some sick fuck in the locker room is going to do truly horrible things to you, and your mental illness will only get worse after repeated hits to the skull and traumatic events.

And let’s look at the facts, it was just a month ago when Chris Chaos and Cadryn had their big match on Savage. I’m not bringing that up because Cadryn lost, I’m bringing it up because he took a fierce beating. He got dropped on his head by Chaos, and he was nearly exhausted by the end of that bout. His eyes were glassy, and he was hanging on to survive. Then Michael Graves interfered and hit Grave Consequences to put Cadryn away. None of that helps Cadryn mentally.

If I’m not mistaken, Cadryn followed that match up with an extreme brawl with Barney Green a little over a week later. All of the headshots, the whiplash of his neck, and getting smashed by an obese wrecking ball. That adds on. That puts mileage on Cadryn. And when I hear him genuinely perform as a jester, but then approach guys for serious handshakes to show respect, I question how he goes from one extreme to the other so fluidly. And I’m sure I’m not the only one worrying about him.

I’m standing up for him, the rights of Cadryn. I’m standing up for him right now, so people will hear this message, and he can go get the help he needs without worrying about being judged. People won’t think any less of you, and if they do, you can come back healthy and kick their ass. You’ll return at your peak because wrestling is a mental sport. You need your wits, and you need to have a realistic view of yourself and the world around you. I want you to get help, so you can come back and be at your best. It’s not because I’m a nice guy. I’m just being a decent person.

You see, my whole goal here in the XWF is to end the rigorous oppression to the lizard people. It’s not because I’m blindly their friend. It’s because I think our society is sick. I find it so disgusting that people can’t look past the obvious. People won’t view my lizard friends as more than then monsters. They see them as large scaly creature, and then they assume that they have an appetite for human. The alternate view is that people simply don’t believe they exist. Either one of these mentalities reinforces the cultural norm that lizard people are not real people. But they are equally as intelligent if not smarter than the common man.

This oppression is cruel, inhumane, and unethical. That’s why I’m getting so upset that these mentally unstable men are lining up to challenge for my title in the XWF. In some sick twisted way, I find myself fighting for important values. I’m fighting for freedom and unity. But I had to beat a schizophrenic man, Mezian, to carry on towards my goal. Now I’m going to have to beat a man with multiple personality disorder. All to show that people our society should come together and unanimously help the oppressed.

That feels so wrong, so contradictory, but it’s not my fault. I didn’t sign Cadryn or Mezian up for this company, and I’m not the one booking my matches. But the management here is doing a disservice these guys. They know they have problems, but they aren’t offering them any help. They’re just throwing them in a violent environment for the entertainment of millions. We should all agree that we need to offer them some services for their own well-being, before we let them brawl and bleed.

But with all that being said, Cadryn, on Savage Saturday Night I’m going to treat you like I would treat any other challenger. I’m going to fight you with the energy and enthusiasm I normally bring. You’ll get the same treatment I gave to Mezian, Peter Gilmour, Jack Cain, and Danny Imperial. I’m going to throw everything at you and I’m going to find a way to win and hold onto my XWF Television Championship. But after the lights go out at the Chesapeke Energy Arena, after you find yourself back in your hotel room, I want you to get a good night of sleep, and when you wake up, call a psychiatrist and get some help. You aren’t in a healthy place, but you can fix that.

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode Cadryn Tiberius: A Case Study
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