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X-treme Wrestling Federation » XWF Live! » News, Rumors, Hype, etc...
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Live from the parking lot!
Author Message
JackCain Offline
Fighting to the last man



XWF FanBase:
Teens, some men, few kids

(booed by casual fans; hurts people; often angry)


#1
05-19-2017, 12:13 PM

**Steve Sayors races across the parking lot after Saturday Night Savage. Jack Cain has caught a thief trying to break into his car. Cain has one of his arms twisted behind his back and is slamming his head into the bodywork with the other. Already he has a broken nose, two black eyes and is covered in blood. Steve beckons the cameraman over to catch some time with the giant**

SS: Mr. Cain, Mr. Cain, can we get a few words that hopefully don't include "fuck" and "off"?

JC: What do you want Sayors? Can't you see I'm fuckin' busy?

**Cain continues to bounce the car thief's head off the hood of the car**

JC: Learned your lesson yet? No? Good. Keep learnin'

**Cain continues to bash his head against the metal**

SS: We wanted to get your views on the fact the man who inflicted your first pinfall defeat here in the XWF, and the man you'll now be teaming with next Wednesday Warfare - Cadryn Tiberius.

JC: Caddy - yeah, that's my pet name for him - he's a good kid, and fair play to him, he beat me fair and square. No way around that. Still think if I'd'a caught him on a different day I'd have taken his fuckin' head of his shoulders, but that's all in the past. We're on the same side now.

SS: So you're not concerned that Caddy handed you your first pinfall?

JC: Did I say you could call him Caddy you fat little cumstain?

SS: No, but I assumed...

JC: Assumin' gets you nowhere Sayors. Assumin' gets you to where Micheal Graves is now. You "assume" society will accept you like to play with your baby carrot cock over little girls. You "assume" that you can kidnap underage minors and no one will come looking for you with a fuckin' chainsaw. You "assume" that because you're in this AX3 Golden Girls tribute act that you're safe. I got news for you: You fuckin' ain't! I'm gonna come lookin' for you at Warfare with the biggest fuckin' sharp object I can find and I'm gonna make sure you need to sit down to piss for the rest of your life, then I'm gonna send your friggin' tiny member to the nearest zoo and they can feed it to the fuckin' meerkats. And as for Main and Chaos? Stop your grinnin' and drop your linen, cos I'm gonna chop yours off next - course that might just be big enough to cover a Happy Meal bun, but not by much.

SS: Strong words, but not as strong as some of the exchanges you've had with John Blaq and the Bitch Doctor in recent days.

JC: Those two fuckin' clowns? I've seen some jaw-jackin assholes in my time, but these two dicks take the fuckin' biscuit - and that's a piss soaked biscuit. Well I got news for you two boys - I ain't eatin' your piss soaked biscuit. All I keep hearin' is "" this and "cunt" that - you're obsessed with and cunts! Either find a and take a fuckin', or fund a cunt' and give it a fuckin', just fuckin' get it overwith. There's only so much decent people - like Caddy - can take, and I don't want him hearin' all that shit, it's bad for his soul y'know?

SS: Before you get through fracturing this man's skull, Jenny Myst had some some derogatory comments for you in the course of her build up to her match with the Bitch Doctor - what about those?

JC: You mean the hamburger line? Yeah, I heard that. She's just imaginin' sittin' on my ace cos that's the most meat she'll ever get near that diseased pussy. Nice tits though Jen, I'll give you that.

SS: So in conclusion then, giving some head action to this guy, standing behind Caddy, , cunts, and nice tits?

JC: Fuckin' spot on Steve. Now fuck off.

SS: Jack Cain, once again, thank you for your time.

JC: Fuck off.

[Image: JackCain.jpg]
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(05-19-2017), Imperial (05-19-2017)




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