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Anarchy results!
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"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane Offline
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(cheered; very rarely plays dirty but isn't lame either; many likable qualities)


#1
03-04-2017, 12:15 AM

Oliver Last
- vs -
The Spartan

The moment this match started we saw a flurry of attacks from The Spartan which mainly consisted of various attempts to get Oliver Last to suck his dick!

The Spartan: SUCK MY DICK!

After about 10 minutes, Oliver figures out how to fend off the attacks by kicking Spartan in the dick and hitting the NEW PERSPECTIVE! (Twist of Fate)

And he goes for the cover!

...1

...2

...THREE!!!







Caius
- vs -
Azurine Hallelujah

Early on in the match Azurine Hallelujah catches Caius with a DDT... followed by several more DDT variations for several minutes. He offers a pin with almost no effort and is surprised with Caius kicks out!

After some back and forth, Caius manages to set Azurine up for some sort of big move but Azurine turns it into another DDT and then delivers Serenity's Warm Embrace! (Underhook screwdriver facecrusher)

He covers again!

...1

...2

...THREE!!!







Kropotkin
- vs -
Calypso

THE CLAP! The bell barely rang and Calypso already nailed Kropotkin with his patented Clap which as we all know is a swift kick to the groin followed by a heavy, open hand slap across the face!

THE CLAP!

THE CLAP!

Jesus Christ almighty is Calypso trying to make sure Kropotkin never has kids?

GUNS FOR HIRE! Calypso just unleashed his deadly finisher consisting of a Lou Thesz Press followed by several girly overhand swings to Kropotkin's head!

This one could be over!

Calypso with the pin!

...1

...2

...THHHHHHHHE KICKOUT! The kickout is massive and sends Calypso rolling. He gets back up and goes for THE CLAP once again but this time Kropotkin trips him. In a single bound Kropotkin is already leaping off the top turnbuckle and delivers This Machine kills Fascists! (450 splash)

He goes for the cover...

...1

...2

...Calypso kicks him in the groin to break up the pin. We're not even sure how that's possible but he did it!

Kropotkin holds his groin which must be throbbing by now. Calpyso gets up and rushes at Kropotkin but then... RED ROSA! (Sister Abigail) Kropotkin caught Calypso with his devastating finisher!

He covers the man who defeated Ghost Tank in his own Meat Hook match!

...1

...2

...THREE!!!







Darren Zirado
- vs -
Mick Ashcroft

The match starts out slow as both men continue trying to get the advantage but there is a pretty even back and forth.

Several minutes in, Darren Zirado just goes for it! He attempts the Zirado Bomb but Mick Ashcroft escapes and hoists Zirado up for the Moonlight Lament (F5) and tosses him but Zirado somehow lands on his feet and before Ashcroft can react, Zirado hits a power clothesline.

Zirado maintains the advantage for several minutes, meticulously going to work on Ashcroft until Ashcroft rolls out of the ring and starts laughing? Is he enjoying this?

Zirado exits the ring but he caught instantly by the "Eternally Yours" spear from Ashcroft! Smashing his back into the ring apron!

Ashcroft rolls Zirado back into the ring and goes for the easy cover, hoping Zirado's back has been broken...

...1

...2

...Shoulder up!

Ashcroft smashes his elbow into Zirado's face a few times and goes for another cover...

...1

...2

...Reversed! Zirado somehow turned it around and rolled Ashcroft into a pin!

...1

...2

...KICKOUT!

Both men rush to their feet and catch each other square in the face at the same tight with hard right hands. Zirado ducks another swing from Ashcroft and whips him into the ropes, catching him with a big boot to the face! He pulls Ashcroft back up and sets him up for... WAIT! Ashcroft pulls Zirado as Ashcroft falls backward, sending Zirado face first into the turnbuckle!

Zirado is dazed as Ashcroft spins him around, wraps his hand around his throat and nails Zirado with THE SCOURGE! (Chokeslam to Hell)

He drops down and hooks the leg...

...1

...2

...THREE!!!







Random
- vs -
Cadryn Tiberius

The first several minutes of this match saw Random being very random in his attacks, catching Cadryn Tiberius off guard quite a bit but for some odd reason Cadryn seems to be enjoying himself very much. He seems especially happy when he dodges a wild clothesline from Random and catches him with a boxing combination that sends Random down.

Cadryn keeps control of the match for a little while until Random finally sidesteps a missile dropkick and Cadryn crashes down hard. Random kicks him around and then bounces off the ropes to gain momentum for a clothesline from Hell!

But Cadryn anticipated and ran toward Random catching him with a superkick! That's "The End of The Road!"

Cadryn covers!

...1

...2

...KICKOUT!

Cadryn wastes no time peeling Random up, smiling in a very creepy manner as some guys in the front row, and hitting THE ITALIAN DRIVER! (Crucifix Piledriver)

He goes for the cover but Random just happens to be close enough to the ropes that his foot has landed on the bottom rope. The ref breaks up the pin. Cadryn pulls Random to the center of the ring and goes for the cover...

...1

...2

...SHOULDER UP!

Cadryn pulls Random up but Random hits some quick Muay Thai kicks and punches that send Cadryn reeling back!

Random hits the ropes and comes back toward Cadryn with frightening speed to hit the clothesline from Hell! Cadryn spins in the air after being his and lands on his head!

Random with the cover!

...1

...2

...KICKOUT!

Random kicks Cadryn in the head and face a few times before pulling him up and setting him up for... NO! Cadryn powers out and hits a textbook dropkick right to Random's face! Random falls to one knee as Cadryn rushes up and kicks him in the face, immediately grabbing him and delivering another ITALIAN DRIVER!

The cover!

...1

...2

...THREE!!!







Federweight Championship Match
Jim Caedus
- vs -
Reverend Waters

The fans are really getting into this match as it goes on and both men take turns gaining the advantage. Jim Caedus has been hitting shady maneuvers of all kinds and these crazyass fans are loving it!

Jim catches Waters with a tilt-o-whirl backbreaker attempt but somehow Waters ended up spinning around and landing behind Jim! When Jim turns around Waters is already kicking his leg out from under him and following up with a shining wizard. Waters holds the advantage for some time now, systematically breaking Jim down by attacking his legs and arms, then finally focusing on his head which leads into a Pike County Plunge-Stump puller piledriver! The way Jim's body came straight down onto his own head may have broken his neck!

Waters goes for the cover!

...1

...2

...Foot on the rope!

The ref breaks the pin and Waters pulls Caedus up into a triple suplex as the fans start chanting "Eddie Eddie" and then Waters climbs the ropes to go for THE HOLY GHOST! That double foot stomp... MISSES Caedus who rolled out of the way and before standing was able to kick his leg right into Waters' ankle the moment his feet landed on the canvas, causing Waters to tumble backwards and crash hard on his back!

Caedus takes advantage of the situation by getting up and stomping Waters in the face, targeting his nose and also stomping on his throat! He rips Waters up from the canvas and delivers a snap suplex, pulling him right back up and now hitting a snap german suplex. He pulls him up again and german suplexes him into the turnbuckles, causing Waters' head to smash into the middle turnbuckle, bending his neck in a frightening manner!

Caedus stomps Waters' face a few more times and kicks him while he's down until Waters slowly makes his way back to his feet. Caedus moves in quick... Waters with an arm breaker that takes Caedus down straight into THE WILL OF GOD!

He's got that anaconda vice variation locked in tight!

He's wrenching with all his might with Caedus right in the middle of the ring!

....

......


........


............


The fans are on their feet, some of them starting to chant "tap tap tap!"


Caedus starts to turn his body just enough to knee Waters in the back and break up the... NO! Waters just pulled Caedus up and drove him back down with a devastating yurinagi slam, straight into the Will of God again!

This time he has it locked even tighter and you can see Caedus is writhing in pain!


Many of the fans are once again chanting for it!


"Tap! Tap! Tap!"







The ref checks the situation closely...




The ref has his hand in the air ready to signal for the bell!








Caedus has nowhere to go!







He has only one choice if he wants to at least be able to hold onto and defend his TV title!






Logic suggests it's time to do it!






AND CAEDUS TAPS........................................... HIS FOOT HARD INTO THE ANKLE OF THE REFEREE WHO COLLAPSES AWKWARDLY ON BOTH MEN, CAUSING THE HOLD TO BE BROKEN!!!



Waters shoves the referee off of him and turns around just in time to see Caedus with his back to him. Waters comes up behind Caedus and grabs him... LOW BLOW! Caedus lifted the back of his heel into Waters' groin so hard that somewhere in the world Ric Flair felt it and was damn proud!


Caedus falls down to one knee still in great pain from being held in the Will of God so long, and meanwhile Waters is down on both knees with his nuts feeling like they just exploded in the worst way possible.

Caedus and Waters both slowly force themselves back to their feet and... ANOTHER kick to the groin! Caedus basically punted Waters groin like there was no tomorrow, followed by shoving his thumb right into Waters' eye! Caedus smashes his own forehead into Waters' nose with all his might, busting him open and even dizzying Caedus in the process for just a second before stumbling over to the downed Waters and locking it in! HOLD YOUR BREATH! (body lock rear naked choke submission)

He keeps the hold locked in with all his might as blood gushes from Waters' face and trails down onto the canvas, painting it red.

The referee regains his senses and checks for the submission...


...


...



.....



AND...........



....................





....................












NOTHING!


Waters won't give it up!!!!!




More blood rushes from Waters' face as Caedus is using all of his might to apply maximum pressure!





WATERS somehow is still....... wait........ he's not even moving at all now!


The ref checks closer as more blood rushes and he immediately calls it!


DING DING DING!!!




Waters never gave up but the ref has stopped the match due to his unresponsive state and dangerous amount of bloodloss!

Many of the fans are chanting "bulllll shiiiiiiit.... bullllll shiiiiiiit..." as Caedus releases the hold and is awareded his Federweight championship, barely able to stand after such a grueling encounter.







MAIN EVENT
Suicide Jack
- vs -
Mr. Tidbits

The fans aren't quite sure how to react to Suicide Jack's crackhead looking ass in the ring but they don't have much time to think about it because as soon as Father Slathe at ringside manages to get Suicide Jack's attention for a split second, Mr. Tidbits is on the attack with a flurry of fists followed by a military press slamming Jack down across the top of the corner turnbuckle! Slathe looks on in approval as Tidbits smashes Jack in the ribs and side of the head while he's stuck up there across the turnbuckle for several more seconds. Tidbits then hoists Jack off the turnbuckle over his shoulder, turning him downward into a tombstone piledriver!

Jack's body spikes straight down and bounces up into the air a couple inches after being driven down with so much force. Tidbits stalks his prey, kicking him in the head and ribs a few times, and then kicking his legs out from under him when he tried to stand. Tidbits finally stands over Jack and grabs him by the throat with both hands, pulling him up and into... OH! Jack just caught Tidbits in the gut with a lightning quick knee followed by a low dropkick to the shins that collapses Mr. Tidbits!

Jack leaps as high as he can and just stomps both of his feet down into Mr. Tidbits as hard as he can before going for a pin!

...1



...KICKOUT!


Tidbits storms to his feet and catches Jack with a clothesline that almost decapitates him. He smashes Jack's head into the canvas repeatedly before pulling him up by his head in a vicegrip like manner and gorilla pressing him over his head. Jack manages to wriggle free and kick Tidbits in the head on his way down, following up with a forearm to Tidbits' throat and a leaping headbutt right to Tidbits' chest that sends him careening backward and crashing into the corner!

Jack rushes in and scoops Tidbits upsidedown, hanging him on the turnbuckle for a tree of woe, just unloading with lightning fast kicks to Tidbits body and taking advantage of his foot being level with Tidbits upsidedown face now, kicking him in the face as hard as he can several times!

Jack backs up several feet and then... TIME WARP! That running dropkick to Tidbits while he was in the tree of woe may have broken him in half! He crumples to the canvas as Jack backs up again, running forward with a baseball slide that sends Tidbits under the bottom turnbuckle and gets him stuck there, also wrapping his ribs around the post in the process!

Jack can taste victory as he...

OH SHIT!

Father Slathe with his burning cigar right in Jack's eye!!!!

And I mean IN his eye!!!!

Jack has the damn thing stuck in his eye socket with smoke rising up from it as Father Slathe quickly helps pull Tidbits out from his unsavory position. Tidbits takes advantage of the situation and hits a Phenomenal Forearm right to Jack's face, sending the cigar flying away as Jack crashes to the canvas hard. Tidbits drags Jack and seats him against the bottom two turnbuckles, then goes to climb the far turnbuckle... he leaps! Coast to coast!!!! He just nearly shattered Jack's skull after soaring across the entire ring and catching him right in the face with his feet traveling as such a horrific speed!

Suicide Jack's lifeless body is rolled just a couple feet away from the corner now, a perfect position for Tidbits to climb up and.... TIDBIT OF HEAVEN! He just nailed that 630 Phoenix Splash perfectly!

He goes for the cover!






...1














........2
















.................................








KICKOUT!?!?!?

How in the hell!?

Somehow Jack is still alive, twitching on the ground as Tidbits looks down at him in anger, disgust and disbelief. Tidbits yanks him up to his feet and presses him high above his head into the heavens, tossing him halfway across the ring!

But Jack somehow lands on his feet!

Jack springs forward and looks to be delivering a running forearm but instead kicks Tidbits in the gut, completely catching him off guard and doubling him over. Jack hops up over Tidbits' neck and hits a Canadian destroyer! He rushes over to the top rope and leaps, flying like a bird and crashing down into Tidbits with a devastating flying headbutt!

He covers!

.....



....


....1




.......






.....





......2






........










...THRRRRRRRRROWN OFF OF TIDBITS IS JACK!!!!!

Tidbits like a house of fire explodes to his feet and charges Jack but Jack just flings himself toward Tidbits in a high crossbody block that catches Tidbits in the face and surely must have hurt hurt like hell, but Jack is so used to pain that he is able to quickly follow up on the downed Tidbits by stomping both of his feet into Tidbit's face!

Jack pulls himself to the top turnbuckle and this time lands a perfect guillotine legdrop across Tidbit's throat!

He pulls him up... A WRINKLE IN TIME! (Burning Hammer, but with a twist at the end so the opponent lands face first onto Jack's knees in backstabber/codebreaker fashion)

The fans let out a resounding "Oooooh!" as the finisher connects! Father Slathe can't believe his eyes as Jack goes for the pin!



.....





....1





.....






.........







...........2








..................












....................





















THREE!!!!

The victorious Suicide Jack wipes some of the blood and ash from his right eye as the ref raises his hand in victory.

Ladies and gentlemen, this has been ANARCHY!

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Cadryn Tiberius Offline
The Essence Of Excellence



XWF FanBase:
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(cheered; very rarely plays dirty but isn't lame either; many likable qualities)


#2
03-04-2017, 08:16 AM

OOC: I like the shorter results. This is a fun concept overall.



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#3
03-04-2017, 03:06 PM

Congrats suicide

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Death before Dishonor...
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#4
03-04-2017, 04:31 PM

More anarchy in the future please! Congrats jimbo!

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#5
03-04-2017, 10:40 PM

ooc- Shane- I like it a lot man, I too think Anarchy would be a cool constant

Muddy- Thank you, it was an honor to face you brother

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#6
03-05-2017, 10:27 AM

(03-04-2017, 03:06 PM)Mr. Tidbits Said: Congrats suicide

It was rude of me to not tell you how this was going to end, but I wanted you to be surprised.

Everyone loves a good surprise.

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#7
03-05-2017, 10:47 AM

Oh I have a feeling, the next time we meet, you may be the one who is surprised Jacky boy!

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