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Cadryn Tiberius · **02-21-2017, 04:44 PM**

Respect..

You say that upon my return to the XWF, I failed to notice you greet me as I made my way through the doors. You're right, Jim, I didn't. And for that I apologize. I had a lot on my plate at the time and was overwhelmed.
And for the record, no one ignored me upon my return. If you had paid any attention whatsoever, you'd have seen that many of our great XWF superstars joined me in the cereal aisle at Walmart for a little bit of ball busting.

Our first match was incredible. We both brought everything we had into that ring, and we left it in that very ring on that unbelievable night. And I'll be honest, I didn't beat you. You're right. The time came to a close, and there wasn't a winner. But in that same sense, Jim, you haven't been able to beat me either.

You talk about how many times you've kicked out over the past few weeks, and for that I congratulate you. But can you honestly tell me you would have kicked out on that fateful night? I have a hard time believing so. Even superstars like Thomas Nixon thought for sure we had a new champion after seeing you hit with my Italian Driver.

I didn't throw a fit, Jim. I stated facts. I stated that with one more second on the clock, I would have been crowned new TV champion. You sit there and you call me a bully when in reality all you've done is threaten me for weeks on end. You've harassed me about my sexuality, mocked me for my lack of physical prowess, so truthfully, who is the real bully here, Jim?

Of course I made a cardboard belt and declared myself the undeniable TV Champion. Why wouldn't I? My main goal is comedic value, and that was one for the history books. Not only did my fans love every minute of it, but you hated it. It plagued you like a nightmare. You felt mocked, betrayed, and undervalued. And it forced you into a corner which left you no choice but to defend your honor and the credibility of your title against me. You say that you didn't fall into my trap, I beg to differ.

How dare you question my faithfulness to my values, my commitment to this company and its fans. I'm one of the nicest guys here. But even nice guys have their moments of rage, followed by serenity. Again, it was all an elaborate ruse to rile you up and get you right where I wanted you. Again, it worked and I won the battle of wits once and for all.

I knew damn well what you were trying to do with Graves. You think he didn't tell me about your ploy to break up our tag team and try and recruit him into your own little stable, so to speak? Of course he told me. He told me that you had made him an offer, and he even went so far as to admit that he had considered it because he thinks that you are a hell of a talented guy, as do I, but in the end he chose our friendship over the obvious status bump that he would have gained by joining up with you. He made the decision to not align with you and to tell me because like you said about yourself, Graves is a man of higher values who need not hide things from his best friend. If you think we keep secrets from one another, you're sadly mistaken, Jim.

You keep going back to the whole “You're not a baby face” argument, when it's obvious you have no idea what you're talking about. Again, you said I was a bully, that I was mean spirited, and that I was an immature heel. You couldn't be further from the truth if you tried, Jim. I do anything but set a disgusting example for my fans. My entire world revolves around making people laugh. Whether it's my opponents, my fans, or my friends. That's what I do in life, that's how I get through the good times and the bad. How can you sit there and tell me I set a bad example for my fans when all you ever do is cuss, threaten, and spew homophobic insults at me. Every other word out of you mouth is “

” which I imagine is probably pretty offensive to our homosexual fan base. You'd better take a look in the mirror before hurling such weightless insults at others.

Weak willed? Incapable of facing the truth? Being weak willed would have caused me to give up the little charade I had going a long time ago. And if you're wondering what charade, I still mean the one where I suckered you in to another title shot. I face the truth everyday, just like you Jim. I wake up and I realize my life isn't exactly what I had hoped it would be, and I keep pushing forward. I don't complain about it, I don't base my aggression's off of it, I just keep moving forward. You continue to attack my honesty and my credibility. At what point have I ever given you any reason to discredit me? I've shown up for every match ready, willing, and able. I've gone the extra mile behind the scenes and beyond, and I've spoken with numerous members of our roster, all of which seem to enjoy being my friend. I've never lied to you. I laid a very obvious, honest trap, and you fell for it. You can't blame me for your ability to continue to be oblivious to everything around you. The world is moving on, with or without Jim Caedus.

Not worthy of holding any title? Well, it's apparent that I am as I have been Heavymetal Weight Champion once already, and let's not forget, Undisputed TV Champion. Yes, Jim, I will continue to throw that in your face. Especially considering, Reno, and other superstars enjoy the fun it brings, and we continue to defend our prestigious title. I will not show weakness, Jim. I will not lie, I will not hide behind Micheal Graves. You will not capitalize on any of my faults, as you so claim you will be doing. You can continue believing I am just a pretender, keep writing me off, I don't mind. Because at the end of the day, you're scared. You've never encountered an enemy like me before and you have no idea how to react. So you're just running off at the mouth every chance you get, in hopes to get some kind of rise out of me. But, alas, you have failed once more.

Blah, blah blah. You've disrespected the belt! You've made the belt less reputable! Shut up. You're an idiot. If nothing else, my little stunt with the cardboard title brought more publicity and more interest to a, let's be honest, not so interesting title anymore. Yeah, it's the main attraction of Savage, I get it. But until we came along and had our thing, it wasn't really garnering much attention. Now, we have much bigger superstars signing on for Savage to defend much bigger titles. Who did that, Jim? We did. You're disdain and ignorance partnered with my comedic value and intelligence brought the whole show to a new level.

It seems you're overly thrilled to be in a “First Blood” match with me this Saturday on Savage. You say that I'm gonna be a coward and that I'm gonna cheat to win. And again, the answer is still no. I don't need to cheat to beat you, I don't need to pour fake blood on you, because it's apparent your vagina is producing enough blood that if not taken care of could cover us both and force this thing in to a draw again. And we definitely don't want that.

Let's talk about respect, Jim. I generally wouldn't stoop to such a low level, but as I've seen you do many times, I'm going to. You tell me how I lack respect for you, and for the title, and generally for everything in life. Well, we both know that isn't true. When you first came about in the XWF who was one of the first people to pull you aside backstage and tell you they loved your work, and that they thought you were a hell of a wrestler?

Me.

Who week after week, regardless of your wins or losses, came to you and talked to you about everything in your life and how I still thought you were a great talent and a great guy?

Me.

Even after our first match was a draw, who came to you and talked to you about everything and how proud I was of the both of us in that fight?

Me.

Who pubically congratulated you on your victory in the first round of Lethal Lottery and then wished you the best of luck in the next round with your new team?

Me.

Do we see a pattern here, Jim? Because from what I can see, I've done everything in my power to show you my respect. To give you everything I possibly can in the form of respect and compliments. And I meant every word of it, too. Nothing that happens inside of that ring changes how I feel about you as a wrestler, Jim. And that's where the problem is. You can't separate business from backstage. You take everything personally as if I spend the entirety of my day plotting to attack you.

Of course not, you're interesting, but not that interesting. You're so worried about what the rest of the world thinks of you. Why? Who cares? And for the record from everyone I've talked to in the XWF we all love you. But that's what happens when the lights dim and the cameras shut off.

Like I said before, I respect the hell out of you. In fact there may not be another guy in this company that I respect as much as I respect you, because I have seen what you are capable of in and out of the ring. But come Savage, I will end your reign as champion, and begin my own.

And that my friend, is reality on the motherfucking rocks..

Suddenly there is a knock at the door. Cadryn puts his phone away and begins to address the knock at the door.

Cadryn: Who is it?

Micheal: Dude, it's been a minute, are you alright in there?

Cadryn opens the door to find Gravy standing face to face with him. Well, more like chest to face, as Graves towers over Cadryn. Cadryn smiles and says strolling past Graves:

Cadryn: I'm fine, Gravy. Let's get a drink and enjoy ourselves. This is supposed to be a celebration!

Micheal looks confused as he watches Cadryn stroll by. Micheal leans into the doorway and takes a curious look into the restroom wondering if maybe Cadryn just spent the last 20 minutes snorting xanies off the back of the toilet or something. Oh well Micheal thinks as he shrugs to himself and jogs to catch up the Cadryn.

Micheal: Are you sure that it's a good idea for you to have a drink? You do remember what happened last time you were in a bar don't ya?

Cadryn: Oh, Gravy. I'll be fine. I just want to have a drink or two and celebrate our victories! Well, your victory. I lost.

Micheal and Cadryn take their seats at the table with Darren Zirado.

Micheal: You lost to Robbie Bourbon and Jim Caedus. Two guys that granted, I think you could beat one on one, but you were out there relying on Killjoy to put up a fight and help you win. You might as well had been out there on your own.

Darren Zirado looks over to Micheal with the shittiest of grins on his face.

Zirado: Son, didn't you just lose to that Killjoy fella a couple a weeks ago?

Micheal's face turns a little red from embarrassment as he stumbles to defend himself. Luckily for Micheal, it doesn't take Cadryn long at all to think of a clever retort.

Cadryn: Didn't you beat up a Wendy's employee once earlier in your career for literally no reason at all? Who walks in to Wendy's and for no reason decides to lay waste to the entire staff and customer base? Your track record thus far doesn't allow you to degrade Gravy for his own.

Darren: That was a trying time in my life son. I was new to the stardom and money that comes along with working for a nationally televised product. I slipped and fell on dark days. Before I knew it, I found myself addicted to the devils sugar, and from there it was one bad decision after another.

There is an awkwardly silence as Cadryn and Micheal look to one another for any indication on how they should proceed. It's Micheal that decides to break the silence though, and he does it with this statement.

Micheal: Dude, you jobbed three matches and quit!

Cadryn laughs to himself before trying to put an end to the awkwardness.

Cadryn: Don't feel bad, I went 0-2 my first time in the XWF. Now, I'm 3-1-1 and that's about to improve to 4-1-1 after my championship victory over Jim Caedus this Saturday.

Darren claps his hands together overly excited as a big goofy smile spreads across his face!

Darren: Hell yeah son, that's the attitude!

Darren suddenly jumps up, kicking his chair to the floor behind him as he begins clapping and stomping his feet in rhythm as he sings...

Darren: I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing ‘cause You pick me up
Sing ‘cause You're there
I can sing ‘cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last...

Micheal and Cadryn sit there utterly embarrassed by Zirado's obnoxious singing. Thankfully it garnered the attention of one of the barmaids. A rather haggered looking 30 something year old woman, who even in this bars dim lighting looks like something that crawled out of a dead trolls rotting asshole walks up to our three heroes. Her name tag prominently displays her name as Elizabeth.

Elizabeth: What'll you fine gentleman be having tonight?

Darren snaps out of his silly gospel song and dance routine and picks up his chair. Sitting back down at the table like nothing happened.

Micheal: Captain Coke and an Icehouse?

She looks to Darren.

Darren: Three shots of whiskey and a Budweiser.

After scribbling his order down on her note pad she looks to Cadryn.

Elizabeth: And for you sexy?

Cadryn has the most ridiculous look on his face. It's a mix of anguish and happiness. I'm not sure if it's because of how embarrassed he was of Darren and his dancing, or how embarrassed he was that the waitress called him "Sexy". Either way, Cadryn, being his awkward self burst out loudly towards the waitress.

Cadryn: CHOCOLATE MILK..

Darren: What my boy means to say is Mexican Mudslide.

Cadryn: I don't know what that is...

Micheal: I don't thin..

Darren cuts Micheal off by simply speaking MUCH louder than him.

Darren: IT'S THE SWEETEST CHOCOLATE MILK IN THE WORLD, BOY!

Cadryn: I WANT THE SWEETEST CHOCOLATE MILK IN THE WORLD..

Elizabeth rolls her eyes and walks away. It'd be safe to assume that she doesn't find Cadryn too sexy after that exchange.

Cadryn: Gravy, I haven't said much about it, but I have to ask. What did you do with Fravey?

Micheal: Wait, the prop head? Umm...

Graves taps his finger on his chin a few times trying to remember.

Graves: I think I might have left him in Texas bro.

Cadryn: DUDE. HOW COULD YOU LEAVE MY DICK MITTEN IN TEXAS? I UNDERSTAND THAT THE JOKE IS OVER AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT'S A PROP HEAD, BUT IT STILL KEPT MY PEEBUG WARM.

Micheal almost falls out of his chair over Cadryns sudden outburst.

Micheal: You're not seriously wanting that thing to put it...

Darren slams his fist on the table to draw everyone's attention. With a stern look about him Darren softly speaks.

Zirado: Boy you best flush those sinful thoughts from your mind. The good Lord commands that you keep that thing tucked away until the day that you enter holy matrimony with a special woman.

Micheal raises an eyebrow as he snickers to himself. Darren however catches on to the fact that Micheal is laughing at his words of wisdom.

Zirado: I don't even want to hear it from you, boy. I tolerate you being here because of him, but that don't mean I'm about to sit here and let you disrespect me, or my lord with your wickedness.

Micheal throws his hands up in surrender.

Micheal: I'm just saying, nobody saves themselves for marriage anymore!

Darren takes a moment to reflect on Graves words. He's not that naive. He knows that just about everybody out there today is having sex before marriage, but Darren wants more for his little Cadryn. Darren wants Cadryn to grow up to be an even better man than Darren is. Never mind the fact that Cadryn is already around 30, Darren still sees himself as a father figure to this confused boy. Darren looks to Cadryn, a slight pout on his face.

Zirado: Son, are ya still pure?

Cadryn: Define pure. Cause I've had sex with my TMNT doll at least 400 times this month. Also, I had my dick in a prop head. And in my hand, and in my moms hand. So, I mean, I guess I'm still pure in the biblical sense.

Before Darren can throw his tirade, Elizabeth interrupts to deliver their drinks. By the time she leaves, the 3 men seem to forget about the purity conversation.

”I can't believe that we are both getting title shots on Savage.”

”Why not? You kind of masterminded the whole thing.”

Micheal smirks.

”I wouldn't call it masterminding. I just knew that I could play Chris's ego against him and get him in the ring. I didn't expect a title shot to come out of it, at least not like this.”

”But you knew that making a cardboard TV title and rubbing the fact that Jim didn't beat me would lead to a rematch.”

”I figured that would work. I know that I'm want to bash your teeth in if I were him.”

Cadryn's expression suddenly changes from his typical happy go lucky smile to a look of concern.

”You think Jim's going to try and bash in my teeth?”

Micheal chuckles at Cadryn thinking that he's joking, but maybe not. The three of them sit there in an awkward silence for a moment before Darren Zirado decides to slam his palms on the table and break the silence.

“Boy don't you even worry about that vile hobo. You've got the power of Christ backing you now!”

Graves once again chuckles, but Zirado takes notice and doesn't seem to appreciate Micheal not taking the lord seriously.

”Are you and me going to have a problem here boy?”

Micheal sorta waves him off and shakes his head no.

”No sir, Jesus saves!”

Darren Zirado stands up and leans across the table. He is looking increasingly upset with Micheal.

”Listen son, I know you done had a demon occupy your soul, and I know that it was our good lord Jesus who saved you from the fiery pits of Hell. I would think that someone like you would think to show the good lord more respect.”

As the two continue to argue, Cadryn slips off to play a game of billiards with a tall biker type.

Cadryn grabs a pool cue off of the shelf and begins chalking it up as if he's about to get in on this game.

Biker: Hey dickwad, this game here is already in session. Go back over there with your fairy brigade. You got no business in this part of the bar.

Cadryn: I don't like your tone, mister.

Cadryn takes the pool cue and quickly slides it between the bikers legs up near his anus.

Cadryn: HAHA, GOT YOUR TAINT, PAL.

The biker grabs the pool cue and rips it from Cadryn's hands.

Biker: YOU'RE DEAD YOU LITTLE FUCKBISCUIT.

Cadryn: HE'S GONNA CAP N CRUNCH MY ASS!

Cadryn takes off sprinting towards Gravy and Zirado in the hopes that maybe one of them will protect him.

About this time you notice that the biker that Cadryn is playing pool with seems to start chasing after him for some reason.

”Is that supposed to be better than not believing in him?”

Cadryn runs by...

”Help!”

...but both men seem to ignore him.

”I don't know man, I never really believed in God until I met Jesus, and it seems like cheating to meet your maker and suddenly convert to that religion.”

Cadryn runs by again...

”Little help!”

”You know what son, that actually makes sense to me, but I don't think that you should deny yourself salvation just because you didn't have faith and saw the truth with your own eyes.

”Maybe... It's just something that I need a little time to take in.”

”I'll tell you what. This Sunday you should come to church with me.”

And again Cadryn runs by them...

”Please Help!”

And once again he is ignored.

”I'll think about it Z.”

Darren nods.

”Take all of the time you need son, I'm just offering the keys to an eternal paradise.”

Micheal smirks, knowing he is about to make a smart-ass remark.

”And 7 virgins right?”

Darren's eyes grow large with the fiery rage of 1000 suns.

Boy I ain't talking about no towel head terrorist mumbo jumbo religion!”

Cadryn runs by once more...

”GUYS PLEASE!”

But this time Darren Zirado without even looking manages to clothesline the shit out of the biker guy who was chasing Cadryn around. The guy hits Darren's arm and crashes to the ground. Darren, however, didn't budge or take his eyes off of Micheal for that matter. Darren stands there for a moment, his and Micheal's eyes locked.

”Okay okay, I'll go to church with you!

Darren cracks a big smile and nods his head approvingly.

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