The following show was taped on Saturday but airs today!

Gaylord Cockchafer: Welcome everyone to the continuation of Shove It Weekend! I'll be your host, Gaylord Cockchafer and my co-host, who resides backstage and keeps us updated on all the latest happenings, is Balaque Negar. Hey, Negar, can you provide us an update as to what's going on back there?

Split screen action.

Balaque Negar: Well, Gayord, it's pretty intense back here. I tried to get a word with Calypso but he punched me and then used hand motions to write "WCW" in the air. He's still being evaluated by our staff.

Gaylord Cockchafer: Wow, I hope it's not serious. I would hate to see another career get taken by a serious injury.

Balaque Negar: And of course, Gunn, Tickler, and Hysteria have spent the night celebrating their victory. It should be very interesting see who of those three takes home the victory- Wait a minute, I've got a breaking story that just came to me, Gaylord! It's happening in Hysteria's locker room.

Balaque runs through the backstage area with his camera team, brushing past production crew and staff. When he makes it to the door of Hysteria's locker room, he notices King 2 Madz walking out. Madison is cleaning his hands with a towel and is out of breath.

Balaque Negar: John? Why are you here? What happened in there?

King II Madz: Who me? Oh, in there? I don't know, I walked in to congratulate Hysteria and I found him like that. Damn, Negar, you got here fast. But look, I don't think Hysteria's going to be cleared to wrestle on March 6th. What a damn shame. Look, I have to go. Make sure everyone gets this story: Hysteria is out of the tournament due to medical reasons, and I will find his replacement in the next two weeks. And we don't know how he got hurt, make sure you emphasize that.

Negar opens the door to Hysteria's locker room and finds Hysteria laying face with his arm broken and in a pool of his own blood.

Balaque Negar: Oh my God! Hysteria, are you okay, buddy?

Negar tries to push Hysteria's arm back in place but it causes Hysteria to scream out in pain.

Balaque Negar: I'm sorry, Hysteria! I had to see if it would work.

Negar turns his attention back to the camera.

Balaque Negar: Gaylord, I'm going to stay with Hysteria until the EMTs arrive. Needless to say, it's been a crazy night back here. I'll let you know if I have more breaking stories!

Gaylord Cockchafer: Thank you, Negar. Well, there you have it folks. Hysteria is out of the triple threat on March 6th. "What in the hell was John "King 2 Madz" Madison doing back there?" is the question.

Austin Fernando, Luca Arzegotti, Maverick, Game Girl VS Loverboy Vinnie Lane, Robbie Bourbon, Rebel Star, LeStrange Survivor Series Match Losers give up half of their XBux to the winners Maverick reads a poem written by the other team if he loses

Gaylord Cockchafer: We've got a match to get to, folks. It should be interesting to see how this one ends, given the stipulations that we have in place. Speaking of which, our XWF Vice President and General Manager of Shove It is in the ring to conduct the formalities for this match.

King II Madz is in the ring with all eight competitors who already took up 15 minutes with their entrances. John is standing in the middle of the two teams with an empty sack in his hand. Each participant has brought in half of their X-Bux stash as required. And everyone is carrying it in briefcases... except for Maverick because he has shit.

King II Madz: It's almost time, fellas. Did everyone bring their cash?

John sizes up the line of superstars and notices Maverick standing in between Luca and Fernando with his small stack of $400. John can't help himself.

King II Madz: Maverick...

John can't hold it in, he's laughing over the mic.

King II Madz: I'm sorry, buddy. But really?

Maverick: Give me a break, okay?

King II Madz: Don't speak, Iceman. Look, you have to have this much money if you want to be allowed to talk.

John puts his hand on Luca's briefcase.

King II Madz: It's fucked up, though. Ain't it, guys? All seven of you are contributing your fair share of the pot because you work hard to earn your X-Bux. But then you've got this freeloader who's been here for over a year who brings absolute dog shit to the table. Welcome to socialist America where we promote mediocrity! YAY! Well, sorry, Iceman, but there's no free rides on King 2 Madz' show. I don't give hand outs because everyone is expected to pay one way or another. $400 isn't going to cut it! So here is the poem that the other team wrote for you.

John hands Maverick a sealed envelope and a plastic 5 gallon bucket.

King II Madz: If you lose, you're going to stand on top of that shit bucket and recite that poem. HahaHA! Now, welcome to John Madison's America! In John Madison's America, if you can't pull your own weight and contribute like a man, then you're going to provide me with entertainment. In fact, I should be traveling around America, and handing out plastic buckets to all of you motherfuckers who mooch off of me and Uncle Sam! If you don't contribute, and you're taking tax dollars that you didn't earn then you deserve to be my clown.

The crowd boos John for pooping on the poor.

King II Madz: But let's get on with it, shall we? From Team Lane, we have 86,314 and from Team Fernando we have 121,819. That total comes out to... ... Luca? Did you bring a calculator?

Luca shakes his head.

King II Madz: Well, Goddamn.

Maverick pulls a slip of paper out of his pocket.

Maverick: It's 208,133.

King II Madz: Of course. Thanks, Maverick. Should have asked you from the start seeing as how this is like playing the lottery for you. God damn, why are you so poor? Here, you can have this since you need it.

John gives Maverick a $100 bill.

King II Madz: So there you have it, 208,133 Xbux on the line!

The bell rings and starting things off will be Rebel Star and Maverick. Maverick wastes no time, and as soon as he hears the bell, he goes full sprint at Rebel and knocks her down with a lariat. Jesus, Maverick. The audience boos the shit out of Maverick for coming off as kind of a douche for charging after a 130 pound woman like that. Maverick does a good job of manhandling Rebel. He gives her three snap suplexes in the middle of the ring, wasting very little time in between each one. He then drags her into his corner and mudhole stomps her. He tags in Luca. Luca comes in and does the same thing with the mudhole stomps. Luca then tags in Fernando. Again, Fernando comes in and mudhole stomps Rebel. Fernando then picks up Rebel and shoots her into the ropes. Fernando tries to catch her for a powerslam but Rebel reverses it into a small package!

1!

2!

-2.85-ALMOST! WOW, that was close!

King II Madz, who decided to stick around, jumped out of his chair for that one.

Fernando rolls to his corner and tags in Luca before Rebel can catch him. Madz gives Fernando a standing ovation for the smart strategy.

King II Madz: Excellent ring awareness. That's why he's the X-Treme Champion, Gaylord.

Rebel looks back at her teammates who are all eager to get in but she decides to give herself more ring time. Luca walks in and goes for lock up but Rebel takes him over with an arm drag. Luca gets up but gets taken right back down with another arm drag from Rebel. Rebel then hops up to the second rope and takes out Luca with a flying hurricanrana! Rebel throws Luca into the corner and runs into him with a drop kick. Rebel catches Luca with a round house kick to the jaw that snaps his head back as he helplessly falls forward. She pins him.

1

2

Luca instinctively sweeps his foot under the bottom rope which also gets King II Madz excited.

King II Madz: EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT ring awareness. That's why he's the Tag Team Champion, Gaylord. Tell the people at home!

Gaylord Cockchafer: That's why Luca is the Tag Team Champion, ladies and gentlemen...

Rebel takes Luca to the center of the ring and drops him with a t-bone suplex. She bounds into the ropes for her next big attack BUT KING II MADZ TRIPS HER! The audience boos the shit out of Madison who has no business getting involved. Madz runs up to Fernando and the 2 of them laugh it up.

King II Madz: Bitch got bodied cause she ain't got no ring awareness, right boys?! Hash tags hash tags, awareness?

Rebel loses her temper and goes after Madison but Lane steps in to calm her down. Rebel tags in LeStrange as Luca tags in Maverick.

Maverick runs after Strange the same way he did Rebel but eats a Meathook Clothesline. Strange then throws Maverick into the ropes and catches him with a Samoan drop. Strange then leans back on Maverick and hooks the leg for a pin.

1..


2

Maverick kicks out of that.

Strange keeps Maverick down with a ground headlock. After about 30 seconds, Maverick rolls Strange into a pin but Strange kicks out after 1. Strange then pulls Maverick up and pops him across the jaw with an uppercut that sends him collapsing into the corner. Strange follows up with a corner splash and then shoves Maverick out of the ring. That prompts Kind II Madz, Luca, and Fernando to run over and yell at Maverick to get his fuccboi lazy ass up "before he gets bodied." Maverick tries his hardest to ignore them as he rolls himself after a count of 5 from the referee.

Strange stomps at Maverick upon his entry and gives him a military press slam. Strange runs off the ropes and drops his large knee over the spine of Maverick. He pins Maverick again.

1

2


Maverick kicks out.

Strange picks up Maverick and signals for the end. He lifts him into The Crooked Grin (modified White Noise) but Maverick reverses it into a roll up.

1

2


Kick out!

Maverick runs off the ropes. He nearly runs right into a clothesline from Strange, but he ducks it just in time and delivers a drop kick to the back of Strange. It wasn't enough to take Strange off of his feet so Maverick goes to the top rope. He leaps after Strange for a big move but Strange catches him and lifts him up in the air. Strange is about to slam him down, but Maverick counters with an eye gouge! Maverick goes behind Strange and takes him down into a school boy roll up!

1

Maverick kicks his feet onto the middle rope for leverage!

2


3!

Gaylord Cockchafer: The referee did not see that illegal pin therefor LeStrange has been eliminated! But wait a minute!

LeStrange decides that he isn't finished! He kicks Maverick in the nuts and then gives him The Crooked Grin (White Noise) in the center of the ring. He then spits on Maverick and smears his face with the bottom of his boot.

Robbie walks into the ring and covers Maverick after landing a running leg drop.

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3!

Gaylord Cockchafer: And now Maverick is eliminated! Robbie can thank LeStrange for the assist on that one. We've got ourselves a 3 on 3 match now.

Robbie and Game Girl charge into battle now. GG surprises Robbie with an uppercut followed closely by a low sweep that takes Robbie off his feet. GG then delivers a double stomp off of Robbie's belly that bounces her 5 feet in the air and allows her to pull off a moonsault. GG stays on top of Robbie for a pin.

1

2


Kick out!

GG drops a Power Geyser in the middle of the ring like magic. Supposedly it gives the witch some kind of super strength powers. She stays within the glowing radius of the pillar as she picks up Bourbon with ease. This gives her the ability to throw Robbie over her head, like a rag doll, with a belly to belly suplex! The pillar vanishes after she does the move. GG tags in Luca afterwards.

Luca comes off the top rope and lands on Robbie with the double stomp. He takes Robbie and shoots him into the ropes. He takes the big man back down with a drop toe hold and kicks him in the back of the head. Luca hooks the big, fat leg of Bourbon.

1

2

Bourbon gets his shoulder up.

Luca turns his body over and thrusts his knees into the ribs of Bourbon. Strikes are going to have to be his main source of moves against a man this size. Luca drags Bourbon up to his feet like he's having to lift a sandbag. Luca goes for a piledriver but Bourbon reverses it into an Alabama Slam. Bourbon takes a knee so that he can catch his breath. That also gives Luca some time to recover. They both get up and trade punches. Luca catches Robbie off guard with a roundhouse and then a DDT. Luca pins Robbie.

1

2




Kick out!

Luca wastes no time going back to work. He's choking Robbie on the ground with both hands like he's trying to murder him. The referee reaches a count of 5 and has to pry Luca off of Robbie in order to prevent a DQ.

The referee instructs Luca to let Robbie get up as a result of the 5 count violation. Luca ignores that shit and punts Robbie in the rib cage.

The ref pleads with Luca once more to let Robbie stand up but again, Luca runs and kicks Robbie in the rib cage!

Finally the ref threatens to DQ Luca if he doesn't allow Robbie to recover.

Robbie recovers and Luca attacks him like a cheetah on the hunt. He's kicking Robbie relentlessly in the ribs and jabbing him in between kicks. Robbie stumbles back into the corner. Luca drapes both of Robbies arms behind the ropes in order to expose him. Luca then runs off the opposite corner and slams into Robbie with a running boot to the face! Luca doesn't stop there, though. He slaps Robbie around some and then drives his knee into Robbie's ribs as much as he can before the ref reaches a 5 count. The referee backs Luca away from Robbie which allows Fern to sneak over and clock Robbie in the head with a punch.

Robbie drops to one knee. Luca charges at him for a kick but Robbie stands up and clotheslines Luca! Robbie crawls to his corner and Luca crawls to his. Robbie tags in Rebel! Luca reaches out to Fern but Rebel grabs Luca's ankle just in time. Rebel pulls Luca into he center of the ring and locks in a Fujiwara armbar!

Luca comes an inch away from tapping before he finally manages to touch the bottom rope. Rebel tries to drag Luca back to the center of the ring but the referee steps in between them in order to enforce the rules of the rope breakage. With Luca back up, Rebel goes after him, but Luca nails her coming in with an uppercut to her jaw. Luca centers Rebel and lifts her up for the Getaway Driver but Rebel reverses it into a hurricanrana! Rebel maintains her mount on Luca and pins down both of his legs.

1

2



Kick out!

Star picks up Luca and goes for the GTS but Luca shifts his weight to escape the hold, and dives to his corner to tag in Game Girl!

GG charges into Star and takes her out with a headbutt. GG sets up in the corner and waits for Star to recover and takes her out with a spear! GG makes the cover.

1

2


Rebel with her shoulder up.

GG sets up Rebel for the Super Combo. She gets in a punch and an uppercut, but Rebel dodges the Hyper Bomb attack and takes her down with the t-bone suplex. Rebel throws GG into the ropes and tries to catch her with the pop up powerbomb but Rebel counters with a drop kick! GG takes down Rebel with the raging uppercut and pins her.

1

2


Kick out!

GG goes to the top rope and jumps down for the double stomp but Rebel counters with the super kick! Rebel throws her arm over GG for the pin.

1

2



3!

Rebel has eliminated Game Girl!

Gaylord Cockchafer: It's now Vinnie Lane Robbie Bourbon, and Rebel Star versus Luca Arzegotti and Austin Fernando. Bourbon and Star are both tied with one elimination. Neither Lane, Luca or Fernando have scored an elimination thus far.

Fernando and Bourbon squared off now. Bourbon overwhelms Fernando with a tackle and punches his face into the mat. Bourbon then runs off the ropes and hits a big body splash on Fernando's sternum. Bourbon gets right back up and does the same move. Instinctively he wants to go right for the pin but instead he climbs up to the top rope. It takes Bourbon a while to balance himself before he goes for the splash, but Fernando moves out of the way! Fernando then takes Bourbon's back and locks him in a rear naked choke! We don't see this very often from Fernando but it's the best strategy right now!

Bourbon gets to his feet and manages to shake Fern off his back. Bourbon smacks down Fernando with a lariat, followed by another body splash. Bourbon picks up Fern and gives him a running powerbomb! Bourbon pins Fern!

1

2

MADISON PULLS FERNANDO OUT OF THE RING, BREAKING THE PIN! Bourbon should have had him! Madison is yelling at Bourbon to "eat shit." Bourbon responds with the Space Shuttle on Madz and Fernando! (no hands plancha) Holy shit, he just took out the VP! Bourbon then grabs Madz and gives him a running powerbomb through the announce table! Holy shit!

Gaylord Cockchafer: Maddy just got put through our table by Bourbon!

Bourbon turns his attention to Fernando and chops him in the throat. He then gives Fernando a running powerbomb onto the ring steps!

Bourbon puts Fernando in the ring. He tries to get inside but Luca attacks him from behind. Rebel gets off the apron to go chase Luca off.

That gave Fern enough time to regain his footing and knocks Bourbon back with a step up enzuigiri. That brings Bourbon down to one knee. Fern then steps back and superkicks Bourbon, snapping his neck to the side! Fern rolls Bourbon into the ring and pins him.

1

2

Kick out

Fern drags Bourbon by his mask into his team's corner and tags in Luca. Bourbon gets up and both Luca and Fern throw roundhouse kicks, one to the beck of Bourbon's head, and the other to his face! Luca then hits the 450 "Cash Money Spalsh" Splash and pins Bourbon.

1

2


3!

Gaylord Cockchafer: Ferngotti versus Star and Lane. Lane has yet to fight in this match. He's stepping in for the first time! Star and Luca both have one elimination.

Lane runs in, fresh, and attacks Luca with punches. He gets in about eight jabs before the referee reaches the 5 count. Lane picks up Luca and goes for the Black Label Driver but Fernando runs in and kicks Lane's knees out from under him! Star chases off Fernando. Luca is now attacking Lane with stomps while the referee puts Star and Fernando back in their corners.

Luca gives Lane a piledriver and pins him.

1

2


Rebel breaks the count!

Rebel waves Lane over to make the tag but Lane wants to stay in. Lane hits Luca with a high knee, followed by a lionsault into a pin.

1

2

Luca gets his foot on the ropes!

Lane puts Luca into the Black Label Driver again but Luca escapes it and gives him a low blow! Luca then spins Lane around and gives Lane his own Black Label Driver! Luca covers Lane.

1

2



3 Almost! Too close! Lane realizes he might need to tag out in order to recover after taking that move. He's about to go for the tag, but again decides against it! He doesn't want to let Rebel get a second elimination and advance to the semi finals! Luca throws Lane into the ropes and tries to catch him for a move but Lane takes him out with a high knee, instead. Lane tries for a lionsault but KING 2 MADZ REACHES IN AND PULLS LUCA OUT OF THE WAY! Lane smacks his chest into the mat and Luca scoots towards Lane and puts him in the cross face! Lane gets to the bottom rope pretty quick.

Luca tries to rush Lane but Lane knocks him back with an elbow. It buys Lane enough time to reluctantly tag in Star. Luca tags in Fernando as well.

Fernando runs after Star. Star launches herself off the ropes and takes down Fernando with a hurricanrana! Star gives Fernando the Irish whip and catches him with a power slam. She picks up Fern and gives him a round house kick that knocks him out. Rebel has the X-Treme Champion in a bad way now. She carries him to the corner, and drags him to the top rope. Once she has Fern at the top, she jumps off and gives him the Crash N Burn! (Pepsi Plunge). Fern is knocked out!

Star drags Fern to the enter of the mat while Lane knocks down Luca and Madison to prevent them from interfering!

Star goes to pin the X-Treme Champion, Austin Fernando!

WHAM!

Oh my God!

Gaylord Cockchafer: That son of a bitch! WHY?!

VINNIE LANE JUST TOOK OUT STAR WITH A SUPER KICK! HIS OWN PARTNER! Lane drapes Fernando's arm over Star.

1

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3!

Gaylord Cockchafer: I can't believe it. Lane just screwed Star out of the X-Treme Title and the semi finals of the King of the XWF tournament! He couldn't let her have it! That selfish cock smoking asshole! He has to have it all for himself! It's now Lane versus Fernando and Luca!

Lane throws Star out of the ring. Lane goes for the easy pin on Fernando but Fernando kicks Lane in the face and dives in to tag Luca.

Luca punches Lane and gives him the brain buster. Luca throws Lane into the ropes and nicks him in the face with a drop kick. Luca goes to the top rope for a moonsault but Lane knocks him off balance. Lane then gives Luca a back suplex off of the top rope! Lane pins Luca.

1

2

Kick out!

Lane takes Luca and gives him the Black Label Driver in the center of the ring. Lane pins him.

1

2


Luca kicks out of the Black Label Driver!

Lane shoves Luca into the corner and gives him a splash. He takes Luca to the top rope and drops Luca with the Heartbreaker! (Styles Clash off the top rope) He rolls him over.

1

2



3!

Gaylord Cockchafer: It's down to Fernando and Lane with the X-Treme Title on the line! Lane has to win this via pinfall. He cannot risk a submission if he wants to win the X-Treme Title. He also can't let Fernando take a count out. And Fernando is still messed up from that Pepsi Plunge he took earlier. Madison is urging him to take the count out but first Fern has to enter the ring before that's even an option.

Fernando walks through the ropes and immediately Lane is attacking him with punches. Fernando throws an elbow that catches Lane in the eye followed by a jab with his other hand. Fern throws a kick at Lane but Lane catches it and takes him down for a single leg Boston crab. He's got Fernando in the middle of the ring. Lane quickly realizes his mistake, though, and breaks the hold. He cannot take home the X-Treme Title with a tap out.

Lane pulls Austin up with a waist lock. Austin with a reversal into a waist lock of his own and he throws Lane down with a mat slam. Fernando hits Lane with the backstabber followed by the pin.

1

2


Kick out!

Fernando goes to the top rope and leaps at Lane but Lane catches him with a drop kick. Lane then hoists Fern up for the Black Label Driver. He's about to drop Fernando but he's cut off by a returning Rebel Star! What is she doing out here?!

Star comes face to face with Lane who's speechless.

Star kicks Lane in the balls causing him to drop Fernando. Fernando looks up at Star as Lane drops down to both knees. Star tells Fernando to leave. Madz and Luca pull Fernando out of the ring and drag him up the ramp. Lane stands up to come face to face with Star, the only person who's stopping him from grabbing Fernando and dragging him back into the ring. The referee has already reached a four count.

5

6

7...

Lane tries to walk past Star but she pushes him on his ass!

8

9...

10!

Lane wins via count out!

Star grabs Lane and hoists him up on her shoulders, and gives him the GTS!

Gaylord Cockchafer: Star just got her revenge on Lane! And Fernando can thank her for saving his championship.

Star leaves Lane by himself in the ring as their team are declared the winners.

Lane calls for a microphone as he's still hurting from the GTS.

Lane: Fuck that, I still won. I'll deal with that little problem later. Maverick, get out here. You've got a speech to read that I took time out of my busy day to prepare. Oh good, you're already on your way out!

Maverick walks down to the ring carrying the bag of Xbux, the plastic bucket, and the envelope that contains his speech. Maverick gets everything set up in the ring while Lane sips on a victory beer in the corner.

Lane: I guess you represent your whole team of cowards, huh? Well, get to it! I wanna hear that speech!

Maverick flips the bucket over and stands on top of it as he pulls out his speech. The paper is covered in feces.

“My real name is Josh, better known by you XWF fans as Maverick. I want to formally and permanently clear the air about a few things. First… god damn it. Vinnie? Come on man…”

Maverick looks at the maniacally laughing Universal Champion as he stands outside of the ring, gesturing that Maverick has to keep reading.

“Fuck it, fine. First… I want to formally admit to shitting on all of those titles. I did it. I shitted all over the X-Treme Title, even though I only had it for like ten minutes before Loverboy took it from me. I shitted all over the Tag Team belts, both of them, especially Scully’s while he wasn’t looking, because one of my favorite fetishes besides all the scat, is torturing mentally challenged men. It makes me hard. So very, very hard.”

Maverick turns beet red and hangs his head while the crowd chants “Maverick is a belt shitter” and claps in rhythm over and over again. Maverick takes a deep breath and keeps reading.

“Then, I shat all over the HART title, once a day for as long as I had it. Even when the XWF was closed, I still took the belt out of my closet where I keep all my man gay porn magazines and my laxatives, and I’d shit all over it and spread it all over my body, especially if I had eaten peanuts that day. I shitted on that belt right before losing it to Peter Gilmour, because I knew that he, like me, becomes sexually aroused by the sight and smell of human feces. It’s why he married Maria Brink, and also why he died of pleasure when Guppy Parsh fed him Shane’s poop that one time.”

The crowd now starts chanting “Gilly Eats Shit!”

“I will never, ever, deny that I have shit on titles again. I will readily admit this in every promo I ever do for the rest of my career, because I am a dirty, naughty boy, and it makes my pecker pop when I think about pooping on title belts, even ones I never deserved to have in the first place, which is all of them.”

Maverick starts to scan the rest of the paper, then becomes extremely angry and drops the microphone to his side, screaming over the top rope to Loverboy which is barely picked up by the live mics at ringside.

“Are you serious, Vinnie? Fuck you, man, you really want to make me say this?”

Loverboy laughs again and makes the Johnny Manziel money fingers at Maverick, reminding him that this is the price he had to pay for losing the match while being a broke bitch.

Maverick is fuming and pissed, but he brings the mic back up to his lips and reads from the paper once more.

“But that’s not the real thing I wanted to do out here tonight. No… I needed to get something off of my little boy birdie chest. And I need someone very special to come out here and hear this. Frodo Smackins. Frodo… will you please come down to the ring?”

Frodo’s music is hits after a moment of the crowd chanting “Frodo! Frodo!” the crowd pops big as the dwarf king emerges from the backstage area dressed in his favorite pair of jorts that come almost all the way to his ankles.

Frodo looks sideways at Loverboy, who just shrugs and holds out a fist for Frodo. Frodo thinks, then acquiesces and meets the fist with one of his own for a bro-bump.

As the crowd continues to go nuts, Frodo gingerly climbs into the ring and stands in front of Maverick with his arms outstretched, questioning why he’s there.

“Frodo. Thank you for coming out here, tonight. I needed to say this to you face to face, man to man. Well, kind of a man, to kind of another man. But first… god damn it… first I need to do this right.”

Maverick gets down on one knee in front of Frodo, putting them basically at eye level. The crowd is shocked and hushed, as Frodo covers his face with his hands and blushes, with maybe a few tars of surprised anticipation wetting his eyes.

Maverick looks Frodo in the eye.

“Frodo Smackins… ever since the day we met, even before I met the real you and had your doppelganger shit all over me, which really, truly awakened my inner cravings and gave me the best orgasm of my entire life… ever since I first laid eyes on you, I knew… that I’m in love with you.

“Frodo… I'm looking for my wife. Wait. Okay...okay...okay. If this is where it has to happen, then this is where it has to happen. I'm not letting you get rid of me. How about that?”

The crowd erupts in cheers as Maverick keeps reading from the paper, taking Frodo’s hand in his.

“This used to be my specialty. You know, I was good in a ring. They'd send me in there, and I'd do it alone. And now I just... but tonight, our little project, our company had a very big night -- a very, very big night. But it wasn't complete, wasn't nearly close to being in the same vicinity as complete, because I couldn't share it with you. I couldn't hear your voice or laugh about it with you. I miss my -- I miss my wife.”

Maverick’s voice cracks as the crowd cheers him on, chanting “Maverick Loves Frodo!” repeatedly. They probably will not be letting this go anytime soon.

“We live in a cynical world, a cynical world, and we work in a business of tough competitors. I love you. Frodo Smackins… will you marry me?”

Frodo: "Sorry, shitboy, but I'm already a married man. Go hit up Dim."

Frodo laughs, shaking his head, and leaves the ring. Loverboy high fives him as he walks to the back. Maverick stands in the center of the ring completely humiliated and possibly engaged to Frodo.

Lane: Ahahahahaha! Hey, Mav, there's more in there, isn't there?

Maverick sighs as he moves on to the next paper.

"Dear XWF,

I am Maverick and I wear panty hose when I go bowling. Fuck, man, I'm not reading this shit!"

Lane: Okay, okay. I won't torture you anymore. You can stop. Let's move on to the main event now.

Lane finally stands up and calls for another beer.

Lane: It's time for you to kneel down and give me my money, Iceman. And I want you to smile while you do it and refer to me as King Vinnie.

Maverick rolls his eyes and does as he's instructed. He kneels in front of Lane with the money and hands it to Lane. Lane reaches down to take it but Maverick doesn't let go of the bag. Lane tugs on it again but Maverick refuses to let go of the money sack!

Lane: Give it to me!

Maverick pops up pulls Lane in and drops him with a belly to belly suplex causing the X-Bux to go flying! Maverick isn't gonna take it anymore!

Maverick grabs Lane and puts him into an ankle lock submission! Lane taps out! He's tapping to Maverick!

Gaylord Cockchafer: "I can't believe it, Maverick has finally snapped! He's trying to break Vinnie's ankle! We're out of time, folks. We'll see you March 6th!"

Pest: What a disappointment you are, Maverick. The Pest shall speak to you soon.

The camera cuts in with Mav at his mansion, and he is currently going berserk. He's in an office, and he's wrecking it to bits, tossing up papers, emptying drawers, etc. When he notices the camera, he shouts at the top of his lungs, he shouts--

"FUCKING FUCK THIS MOTHERFUCKING SHITHOLE!"

All of a sudden, Mav's butler, Gerald, peeks in from a nearby corner.

"Are you alright, Master Solomon?"

Mav shoots a dirty look at Gerald, before shouting--

"NO I'M NOT ALRIGHT GODDAMMIT! I WAS HUMILIATED AGAIN, AND I WAS FORCED TO READ THAT HUMILIATING POEM! GODDAMN IT!"

Gerald took in all of Mav's yelling, before calmly saying, "Master Solomon, you must calm down. You reading that poem is not the end of the world, not to mention I'm sure Mister Lane would like some sort of payback for the broken ankle he must no doubt have now."

At the mention of his attack on Lane, Maverick calms down. He takes a deep breath before speaking again.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm calm now. I'm relaxed. I'm ready to go. Lane? It's time we settle this you motherfucker."

The scene fades to black.

Well...those order of eliminations sure were WWE Storyline level predictable, and equally disappointing.

Banner created by Gabe "The Radical" Reno

XWF Career accomplishments/Highlights:

One Time XWF Universal Champion
Two Time X-Treme Champion
One Time Intercontinental Champion
One Time World Tag Team Champion
XWF All Time Top 50 inductee
One Time 24/7 Briefcase Holder
Intercontinental Royal Rumble Winner
Captained the winning team "Team Dominance" at War Games '15
Lethal Lottery IV Finalist
July 2015 Superstar Of The Month
March 2017 Superstar Of The Month
October 2016 Promo Of The Month "Changes"

Man, Trax, that's dead on.

Man, I really suck.

Oh well, guess I'll be positive and fight some more!

Pest: I cannot believe LeStrange beat Maverick. LeStrange, enjoy your win, son.

great show guys..

glad to see bourbon get beat by Luca :P

thats what u get for hitting Maddy!

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion

Quote:“This used to be my specialty. You know, I was good in a ring. They'd send me in there, and I'd do it alone. And now I just... but tonight, our little project, our company had a very big night -- a very, very big night. But it wasn't complete, wasn't nearly close to being in the same vicinity as complete, because I couldn't share it with you. I couldn't hear your voice or laugh about it with you. I miss my -- I miss my wife.”

Jerry Maguire! ???

What kind of person gain assistance from the ropes to pin me? Maverick, you underestimated me for the last time. Before you get Vinnie, I get you.

Where my money at?

"Maddy, you fucking gave me a $100 bill. After I broke Lane's ankle, I went to my locker room to find it had been stolen. Give it to me. Now."

Maverick... if you think for one solitary second that your little statement mattered to anyone, you're wrong, dude.

Fact one, my ankle is fine.

Fact two, you're a cheap-shotting bitch who can't ever get it done.

Fact three, this was... what? The tenth time you've been across the ring from me? And every single time has ended up the same?

You think you aren't finished with me, dude?

Well guess what...


.
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.
.
.
.
.
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.
.
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..
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you are.

Hashtag, still the champ. Hashtag, still the best.

Oh, and Rebel? No hard feeling baby girl. Call me.

(02-22-2016, 06:48 PM)LoverboyVinnieLane Said: Maverick... if you think for one solitary second that your little statement mattered to anyone, you're wrong, dude.

Fact one, my ankle is fine.

Fact two, you're a cheap-shotting bitch who can't ever get it done.

Fact three, this was... what? The tenth time you've been across the ring from me? And every single time has ended up the same?

You think you aren't finished with me, dude?

Well guess what...


.
.
.
you are.

Hashtag, still the champ. Hashtag, still the best.

Oh, and Rebel? No hard feeling baby girl. Call me.

"Well now. You signed your own death warrant. Just to let you know, no matter what happens now, you did this to yourself."

Tell me another one, loser.

I think he's going to rabbit poop in your shoes now.

<3 Gator <3

The one thing that love about the xwf that it has that no other Feds have is that the judging, the writing, the shows that it has are fair, and has a staff that are active to where they will literally write our all of the shows from start to finish. For example the most current show that was posted, I like it a lot.

NOW BE MY BITCH ASS HOLE!!!!!!!!!!

(02-22-2016, 07:20 PM)Ginger Snaps Said: I think he's going to rabbit poop in your shoes now.

"Go back to being drunk, Ginger. You're sweet and all, but I'm not in the mood to deal with incompetence."

Hey, don't poop on me. I don't wanna smell like failure for my next match.

<3 Gator <3

(02-22-2016, 08:18 PM)Ginger Snaps Said: Hey, don't poop on me. I don't wanna smell like failure for my next match.

"Oh for fuck's sa-"

Maverick closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.

"Okay. Ginger. Listen. I'm not a shitter. That load of horsecrap is from Lane's 'poem,' if you can even call it that. I'm trying to make sure he pays the price for humiliating me like that, and I don't need you claiming I'm going to shit in Lane's shoes."

I take a chug from one of my vodka bottles. Maverick's boring me, and he smells like rancid poop. Does this dude own a toothbrush, and some soap? I should help him out with them.

If you say so, Poopsie. Do you need a new nappy?

<3 Gator <3