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X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » "WAR GAMES 2015" RP Board
Team Eli Eat Da Poo Poo
Author Message
Mr Killjoy Offline
Who wants their trap silenced?



XWF FanBase:
Some of everyone

(cheered; very rarely plays dirty; many likable qualities)


#1
09-10-2015, 03:09 AM



Pretty much describes Eli and his band of outcasts right?




Trax says as he smiles in his private jet which is currently soaring over the cloudless California skyline which has not long taken off to embark on a roughly 5 hour flight en route to New York.Where Trax set to have yet another check up with the scientist known as Joseph Hovah. Trax is leaning back in a pristine white leather chair, the rays from the sun shining through the jet window next to him and basking his face in an ambient glow, his Oakley Shades glistening majestically in the light. His girlfriend, Jackie, is in a similar chair opposite him, too busy messaging one of her modelling agents to be paying any significant attention to Mr Dominance as he continues.


Eli, the all but forgotten legend.


Elisha, his brain washed accomplish.


Lancelot, the time warping barbarian.


Mr K, the flamboyant ambidextrous veteran.


And their mystery partner.


All outcasts.


The way I view them, are they same way traditional Ugandans who follow their countries social norms view homosexuals, shit eating, anal fisting, outcasts. Especially Eli. You see Eli vomits out a lot of verbal shit and calls it a promo so I can only assume he's on a heavy fecal diet because what I gathered from that promo is he's totally and utterly full of the stuff.


Lets go over that shit shall we.


You claim your name was once feared by many, you claim your message was once the most talked about thing in XWF. The key word here, and the one I would like to put great emphasis on, is once. You was ONCE feared, you was ONCE talked about. Now? Not so much. People have all but forgotten you afraid to say. Your message falls on deaf ears, there is no fear to your name any more, I do not fear you, none of my team mates fears you, in fact they very much look forward to confronting you. Nobody fears you, well except Shane but that guy jumps at his own shadow my man. Your aura of fear is no more more, now when people walk past you in the hall ways, there is only looks of pity. Pity, because they know they are not looking at a man who was once a prideful owner of this company and a former Universal Champion, but instead, a man who hides in shadows and behind riddles and tin hat theories who has long overstayed his welcome and has nothing more to offer here, much less a challenge to me in a big fight match like this. You see your name is no longer the name that quips everyones attention, the name that is center of attention, and is quite literally in the center of the universe, is mine.



Trax holds up the Universal Championship on the arm rest next to him and drapes it over his shoulder.


Spare me your history lessons old man. You see here in the present... Its my name that rings through the halls. Everyone is glued on me because of the championship I now possess, and everyone feels a way about me, whether they adore me, detest me, fear or respect me, everyone feels a strong emotion towards yours truly. And its for that reason MY message is loud and clear, the message that I will continue to be center of the universe for a long time, long after the CCWF is dealt with, and long after I deal with you, you challenge people to tell you the truth if they claim you speak false. OK then fine, this is the harsh truth, the bitter reality.


Your words have indeed expired, your message which once flowed in the very essence of XWF like a glorious ravenous river has long since gone dry and is full of cracks, so if food and water is what you need to stop a "war" then well this "war" between our teams was over before it began, your words mean nothing and your voice will be silenced, Trap Silenced more specifically, and no matter what contrived explanations to you being here you will blurt out, it makes no difference because the truth is, you don't actually have a snowballs chance in Hell at War Games.



You claim I'm in it for myself, look around you, everyone here is in it for themselves in the long run, everyone here has a individualistic goal they wish to achieve, whether its to make as much money as they can, win as many championships as they can or flat out just brutalize as many people as they can everyone has their own goals, their own missions, yes sometimes teams, and stables will emerge but at the end of the day everybody just does what they can to benefit themselves. Its called Human Nature. We as a species are inherently selfish, we're one of the few species that kill for fun, and harm Mother Nature, tearing down entire forests to create and make way for shit we sometimes don't even need. Thats civilization for you in general, leave your swamp some more you'll realize that Eli. But bringing it back to XWF, can my team mates trust me? They can trust me unquestionably to do all within my power to make sure my team is the winning team, that much they know. Can I trust Sitre? Of course not. I can't completely trust her or ANYONE on my team, especially now that I'm the Universal Champion, that's a big target on my back that both members of the CCWF AND XWF are looking to hit, Austin Fernando has already alluded to wanting to try and earn his shot at me. I'm one half of the tag team champions, and I can't even really trust my partner Lux because one day he'll surely want to go for the big one, and if I still happen to be the Universal Champion when that happens, I have no doubt he won't hesitate to try his chances against me. So no Eli, I can't trust Sitre because the position I'm in now I can't really trust ANYONE. Its lonely at the top, as they say.


Trax looks outside the jet window, its now at its highest reachable altitude, ten thousands of feet above the ground. Trax takes a moment to take this in, the feel of him soaring through the skies in this expensive Jet he paid for with hard earned cash. Its a nice view. Trax grips a bit his title and continues.


By the way I was a bit confused about you bringing up the whole cash in thing, considering you said something incorrect, do I know what happened to those who cashed in their brief cases? Well the last person to do before me went on to become the longest reigning and most successful Universal Champion of all time and is still here, just wanted to correct you there.Just thought I'd point that out. So yeah if you was trying to make a point there its lost on me. But oh wait, you happened to point out something I said also... Elisha is a GUY? Wait, HE was that guy standing in the ring with me, Frodo, Davids, and Lux before I cashed in on Vinne right!? THATS Elisha? My bad, I thought that was just a random fan who had jumped into the ring to get a piece of the action and was wearing a mask to hide his identity. Fans jumping barriers trying to get their hands on wrestlers has been happening a lot in the wrestling world lately, especially in that OTHER wrestling company with the watered down PG Rating. I guess I should of done the research, I didn't dig out and watch his old promos before making my first promo much like I admittedly didn't care to dig out yours. I just heard the name and what he had accomplished and thought it was a woman due to the former, what kind of name is Elisha for a man? Thats a woman's name, typically a black woman's.I have a cousin called Elisha.


Jackie:: I can't stand that bitch.


Jackie looks up from her mobile scowling.


I can't stand her too, always a pain in the ass asking me for money at the family parties, like I don't provide her and the rest of my family with enough. Know what else I can't stand though? Hypocrites. Like Eli James. Eli, you call me selfish, and you claim I use people. Who was the one that sought out someone who wasn't even a official draft pick and was happily enjoying a somewhat normal life with their mother...daughter...whatever, until you creeped back into their life like a sexual abusive father creeps into his sons room at night to get him to join your team at WAR GAMES? Answer me that one, huh. Fucking hypocrite. Don't call me selfish and in it for my own gain when you take people that weren't even listed as a possible draft choice and brought them into this fight to suit your needs. Yeah lets completely disregard the blatant rule breaking, wasn't aware we was allowed to bring in whoever we wanted outside of the given picks for our team, sure you still haven't got a bit of the ol' CEO pull their James? Fuck it... wheres Thunder Bolt X? Pilot! Can you hear me! TURN THIS PLANE AROUND! I need to find Thunder Bolt X! Screw the team I've already got I'll trade them all in for that guy and still own your ass Eli, bring your pet to this War and don't come throwing a fit at me when I put him down like the rabid dog off the leash he seems to be, you're a bad owner Eli I've gotta say. But I already knew your ownership skills left little to be desired from how shit I heard you ran XWF when you was the owner of that.



Smirks.



Eli I'll get back to you in a second but for now lets forget about you and your gimp man slave and talk about the other fools on your team. I'm still not sure if Lancelot is aware he's in a match, I mean the last time we saw him he had only just got to this year and was running around kinda in the same fashion the late Robin Williams was running around in Jumanji when he finally gets released from the board game, crazed, with not one fucking inkling of an idea where he is. His entire promo confuses me to be honest. How was it he was booked for this match BEFORE he even got to this year? Is Jumping Jack Jupiter, the Director of Talent Relations, a psychic now or something? Did he know this time jumping wrestling caveman was going to appear before he actually did so he already booked him in the match ahead of time, and this Lancelot will somehow come to terms with 21st century dialectic and technology in time to cut a promo addressing the match and then turn up for it? It all seems kinda far fetched to me, the whole promo has more holes in it than the new Fantastic Four movie and Jesus have you SEEN the new Fantastic Four movie? As a huge Marvel fan I am NEVER going to get over that shit.


But whatever...I'll play along to Lancelot's promo again. I'm going to assume he'll see this and understand what I'm talking about and the situation at hand. Lancelot I hope you'e somehow miraculously already came to terms with life in 2015. 12th century from 21st century is a huge jump. I have no idea if you're capable of cutting a standard "talk shit about your opponent" promo really, I am fully aware that there was wrestling in the 12th century, but it was naked wrestling. I assure you we all have to wear attire for this match, nobody wants to see Eli James naked, yikes, not even Mr. K.

Also apart from the fact the wrestling you was involved in was likely devoid of clothes, and had more exposed cocks swinging around then Vinnie Lane can lick his lips at another huge difference from wrestling back then to wrestling now is the variety of styles, wrestling was all about grappling and power back then right? Well don't get me wrong that's still a huge factor in these times, but athleticism in the sense of being able to perform dives off a top rope and such is also a thing now and wrestling styles are more diverse. Do you even know what a top rope is? Have you ever performed even a diving elbow drop or cross body? I'd be extremely surprised if, judging from the time you're from, you wrestled the way people from this time now wrestle, you're not used to wrestling the way us guys wrestle now, and that puts you at a huge disadvantage, well, more of an disadvantage than you already was at being on Eli's team.


My only advice for you is try and get as well versed as you can before the match on the different styles me and my team like to use. I'm a brawler and a powerhouse, Davids is pure power, Fern and Roman those two are technical guys, Sully is technical mixed with high flyer which is ironic considering his fear of ladders. Analyse those styles, and do your best to adapt to facing people that use those styles, why am I telling you this, why am I HELPING you? Because Eli sure as hell wouldn't tell you any of this, Eli sure as hell wouldn't and can't help you.


I feel sorry for you, stuck in time, stuck with an impossible task, coming out of this on the winning end. In all honesty you shouldn't be in this match, you should of started off nice and easy in a one an one match against someone manageable like say...Mr. K...I mean that guy loses to dicks so how easy can it get.


Sorry for bringing up about the dick loss again Mr. K, dick loss, ha, Peter lost it and you lost TO it. Thats funny you got to admit, that pesky dick.


I've noticed you have yet to say a word for this match, why is that? Just late coming out the gate like you was late coming out the closet or is it because you actually unlike the rest of the team realize you have no chance in hell so have decided to invoke your right to shut the fuck up and remain silent and have resigned to your inevitable fate and have chosen to take your ass kicking in kind? Wise decision, the LAST thing you want to do is cut a promo and say something to tick me off and give me even the slightest of reason to pay attention to you at any point in this match up, trust me. I won't even bother poking fun at you anymore, as long as you remain quiet while the big men do their talking, well done, that's a good under carder.

Another person who has yet to speak up is the mysterious partner on Elis team. In fact..he has yet to be seen... or heard...wait.



Trax scratches his chin stubble as if deep in thought.


Could it be?


Could the mystery partner really be who I THINK it could be?


The man who currently holds the Television Title, US title, Identity Title, Trio Titles...and the man who has held championships in pretty much every wrestling company across the GLOBE!?



Trax starts to look worried now, even Jackie is looking back up from her phone in a curious manner wondering what the fuck her boyfriend is going on about.


Eli...please.... don't tell me....your mystery partner is....VACANT!?


Who?


Vacant! The number one championship title holder in history!


Jackie rolls her eyes and goes back to what she was doing.


I can't do anything to beat Vacant...or wait....me and Lux Lyden already beat Vacant for the World Tag Team titles, fuck you Vacant!



Trax laughs boisterously for a few moments before wiping a tear from his eye.


Sorry...I know I said I was going to take you and your team seriously in the last promo but...I lied, face it, you're fucked. You're pathetic assembling of bottom barrel feeders are going to get steam rolled Sunday regardless who the mystery partner is and everybody but you knows the truth Eli.The real truth. Past, present, I'm on another level and nobody on your team can hang with me, not even you. You said to compare what I've accomplished next to you and pointed out the fact that I'm not in the top 50 like that means anything, well lets see, I've only been here for 5 months so there goes the whole top 50 argument out the window. I know I've accomplished more than some people who have been here for five years have already but I haven't even been here long enough to be considered for the top 50. Don't worry though Eli, I'm working on it, this time next year, I'll not only be in the top 50, I'll be above you, and that's a promise. I've been on a meteoric rise, and it shows no signs of slowing down soon, and it certainly won't slow down at War Games, with me the captain at the helm of the Tank that is Team Dominance, your team isn't matching our firepower one bit, your team is no rival tank that will destroy us, or a blockade, you're not even a bump in the road, nothing but a band of outcasts who think they're walking into a war, but really they're crawling on the knees straight into a slaughter. Forget XWF and CCWF for a minute, YOU want to talk shit to ME, while looking like a fat neck beard that talks smack behind a computer in his moms basement? Then be prepared to get that shit shoved back thrown your throat Eli. Eat shit and die.


Fade.


















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XWF Career accomplishments/Highlights:

One Time XWF Universal Champion
Two Time X-Treme Champion
One Time Intercontinental Champion
One Time World Tag Team Champion
XWF All Time Top 50 inductee
One Time 24/7 Briefcase Holder
Intercontinental Royal Rumble Winner
Captained the winning team "Team Dominance" at War Games '15
Lethal Lottery IV Finalist
July 2015 Superstar Of The Month
March 2017 Superstar Of The Month
October 2016 Promo Of The Month "Changes"



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