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Crimson Cobra · (04-08-2013)

Crimson Cobra finds himself in a crudely lit room that is filled with all of the usual contents of the under-ring weaponry. The chair Cobra is sitting it is bumpy and dented from previous uses but it doesn’t bother him. He scans the room in an attempt to find useful objects that he will be able to pummel his opponent in less than 24 hours. In this room Crimson Cobra finds himself in a focused train of thought.

“This Senator guy really thinks he’s going to beat me doesn’t he?”

Cobra thinks back to the last time the two met, Cobra was under a vending machine something that should have been crushing him. The only thing that was odd about this was that it wasn’t the vending machine that felt heavy but when John Samuels laid upon it. The machine seemed to have gained one thousand pounds with the tub o’ lard on top. Crimson shakes his head and smiles at the thought, there was nothing else he could do but laugh.

“Let me explain it in only a few words so that they simple minded angry Texas boy might understand what I have to say.”

Crimson Cobra grabs a knife that he finds laying in the corner of the room. He looks at it front and back moving it around in his hand then looks into the shadows as if he were in the ring with Samuels right there in front of him. He acts as though he is stabbing someone but then his hand gets stuck and the fat begins to suck in all that it can only to get fatter. Cobra finds himself laughing again, the train of thought had taken another stop before heading for the final station.

“Finished, Complete, Skilled, all synonyms for the word accomplished, but what does that have to do with anything? Well I have accomplished pissing The Senator off, I have completed the main task, get him to over think, get him angry, get him to make a mistake. The angry Texan isn’t the kind of skilled I’m talking about either, being able to down two 12 ounce steaks in under 10 minutes is impressive and all but that and the immense amount of beers you put down along with it would explain the man tits and stomach that looks like you in your third trimester of pregnancy! This skilled is the skill of acrobatics, being able to soar through the air and land on the precise mark that you want to. But one word is left, finished. I have finished this match in my head over a million times already, not one single time out of the numerous times has The Senator even been standing at the end of the match. He is luck if he is able to walk out of this match, it’s a damn miracle he can walk at all being almost over three hundred pounds. But believe me when I say there is not a chance that The Senator will be taking me out in my own type of match, the cobra adapts and will earn the victory just as he always does!”

Cobra is now in a much more serious tone then before no more messing around and no more fat jokes. Cobra’s eyes lock onto a ladder and he is stuck in the much more serious mood. His evil smile doesn’t cross his face, his eyes don’t even leave the ladder as he begins to talk again.

“The 24/7 FTW UFO championship is what The Senator has around his waist, or well his shoulder I don’t think it fits his waist… staying on subject that title is his pride and joy. How some dumb, redneck, hillbilly, hick Texan is able to outsmart half of the XWF roster and retain that title is a mystery to me. John you are holding that title to near and dear to you, I simply wanted to add the stipulation of having a title match to improve ratings because I can guarantee that when people see you or your name they start flipping channels waiting for the disgusting disgrace of a human being to get off of their television set, and this is all just at the sight of you if they were to actually watch your wrestling skill they would be smashing their tvs with sledgehammers imagining you head in their places. Here I go again rambling with how terrible of a person you are… Well my point here is simple, you stick to your 24/7 STD championship because when I am in the ring with a worthy opponent, someone who owns a real belt, someone who has real talent I will look back an laugh at my own idiotic attempt at capturing that title. When I win my European Championship you will look down as I stand atop the ladder of greatness and you will ask yourself where you went wrong. Well my friend that one is simple….”

Crimson Cobra now has the ladder in hand and has his eyes closed engulfing himself in the anger, the hate, the evil, and the blackness coming from his opponent, he lets a small smile approach his face and finishes his sentence.

“You crossed the Cobra!”

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