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LH Harrison · (07-12-2015)

The camera clicks on to show the tired eyes of LH Harrison boring back into the camera. Raising his right hand, The Inspiration presses his thumb and index finger to his eyes and moves it. A sigh emits from his throat as the hand drops back to his lap. The bags under his eyes indicate that LH Harrison hasnâ€™t slept for a while. As Harrison takes a deep breath, Jason Kain comes into view and hands Harrison a glass of water. LH downs the glass and hands it back. Jason exits the frame and Harrisonâ€™s eyes close for a moment before darting back open with a renewed focus.

Well, Iâ€™m officially back. Thatâ€™s right Phantom, LH Harrison is here to take you behind the woodshed and beat you with that mask youâ€™re hiding behind. After all, I know a few things about wearing a mask. Albeit, youâ€™re going to be a forgotten man after this match. But Iâ€™ve been on a bit of a walkabout. Discovering myself and separating myself from The Asylum. Although we shall be meeting up again soon. Big things seem to be in the works in one way or another. However, letâ€™s focus on you for the moment.

The Phantom. Why does this seem all-too familiar? A masked man with an interest in cannibalism and wrestling. Somehow these things align?

Hmmâ€¦

What is wrong with management? You let a nutcase like The Phantom into this place? The guy just openly admitted to murder prior to his first match?! What is this place? Cannibalism and assassins? Everything about this place screams Twilight Zone now. But letâ€™s refocus.

What are you, Phantom? Youâ€™re an apparition that stalks your prey during the wee hours of the night before silencing their pleas with the steel caress of your blade? And no. I donâ€™t believe youâ€™re an actual apparition before you try to twist those words around. I mean that in a symbolic definition.

Back to point. You seem to be taking me lightly, Phantom. A price that you will certainly have to pay for. However, perhaps you have a point. After all, who am I? Since youâ€™re doing introductions, perhaps I should.

My name is LH Harrison and I am your kryptonite. I am your Achilles Heel. I am the chink in your armor. I will dissect you much like a frog upon the table of a ninth grade Biology lab. Speaking of ninth grade, perhaps I shouldnâ€™t talk of a grade you have no experience of. After all, your choice of words indicate your reading level to be on point with that of a ten year old. Just how is a smile displayed on your face when you wear a full-face mask? Plus your matted hair is covering your face?

That seems to indicate one of two thingsâ€¦

One, you werenâ€™t wearing your mask for that kill which is highly stupid. Even bank robbers know to cover their freaking face when doing a heist. But maybe thatâ€™s how much of an apparition you are. You scare them with your poor hygiene versus your mask and suit of armor.

Two, you canâ€™t remember details to save your life. Perhaps it was the rush of the blood and taste of flesh or weirder, disgusting things that blocked out your memory. Either way, youâ€™re a moron with no sense of which way is north or whether you defecate out of your ass or your mouth. After seeing your promo, it seems to spew from both orifices.

So what do you have to say Phantom? Are you going to comment on some losses that I have? Are you going to speak on the subject of wrestling when you probably donâ€™t even know how to apply a headlock? At least, I have tenure. Iâ€™ve been around the block a few times when you know how to use a shiv. Congratulations, this is a normal match. Stab me with that little thing, and Iâ€™ll win by DQ. So sure, go for it. Iâ€™ll turn that back around on you before stick so far up your ass that youâ€™ll be able to pick your teeth with the steel.

Now that Iâ€™ve dealt with your idiocy, Iâ€™d like to focus on bigger and better things. For instance, The Higher Power and his lack of opponents.

Doctor Louis Dâ€™Ville.

I have enjoyed everything that you have orchestrated from the very beginning of our relationship. You have been a mentor to me and have led me away from the futility of my career. I obtained a title and created an army to be at your disposal. We dominated this federation and the two of us dismantled the entire Defiance. Justin Sane has yet to be seen. Austin Fernando squandered after joining. Shane

has disappeared since handing the title to Sane. CorVus was brutalized and hasnâ€™t been seen since. Meanwhile the only remaining member is Gator. Wellâ€¦ evidently heâ€™s coming back at Relentless. Not only him, but the man who you sent into a coma is also returning.

That gets me thinking.

Itâ€™s been almost a year since we all showed up in the XWF. We were quite different back then. Doc was wandering the countryside with his client, the EX-Detective. Lane was busy riding around with his bandmates and training for his matches. Gator was still belittling his cameraman whom the audience was beginning to love. More than Gator himself to be quite honest. I was busy enjoying time with family in my off time before I came into connection with Doc who turned my life upside down.

All that being said, Iâ€™d like to suggest a match at the PPV be-

BLEEP!

LH Harrison pulls his phone out of his pocket and reads the screen.

Oh! It seems The Phantom has uploaded yet another promo. Letâ€™s watch this crock.

Harrison watches the promo on his phone while periodically yawning through it. Finally he finishes and Harrison chuckles before putting the phone back in his pantsâ€™ pocket.

Well that wasâ€¦ enlightening. You actually mentioned me! I feel honored. But of course itâ€™s Miranda Tigris who allows this moron into the federation. The most useless GM allows the most useless piece of garbage into the fed. Congratulations on finding the easy way in. Itâ€™s commendable. Also, what kind of assassin puts the word assassin in every other sentence? In fact, Iâ€™m not even sure you are an assassin. Youâ€™re a joke. No real assassin would just throw out his profession to anyone who is listening. Well they would, but theyâ€™d be taken care of shortly after it.

So who knows, you may not even MAKE the match or card. I may win by forfeit after some real assassin sends your body to the canvas in a bloody heap.

You want to call me H? Shut up. You donâ€™t have the right. You donâ€™t have the testicular fortitude. Youâ€™re just a shell of a womanâ€™s cunt. What you CAN call me is better. Better than the poor excuse of talent that you are. Oh look! He pulled the predictable card of talking about who Iâ€™ve faced when he hasnâ€™t beaten anything other than himself in his career.

I may have fallen from grace, but you know what the next step of that is? Clawing and crawling my way back to the top. Itâ€™ll start with the stepping stool that you are.

On Monday night, I will destroy the myth and legend of The Phantom and destroy your legacy before you even have a chance to begin the build. So fuck me? No. Screw you.

I am LH Harrison and you?

Youâ€™re just my bitch.

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