"Welcome back to the show ladies and gentlemen. I am your host Graham Norton."





The audience cheers as the camera pans out to show the entire stage.



Graham Norton-"Today we have a special guest hailing from the deep dark dank lands of Russia. The one, the only...Morbid Angel!"



The crowd erupts into a thunderous roar as Morbid Angel makes his way out to the stage, the Universal title slung over his left shoulder. He takes a few steps out into the open and flexes for the screaming fans who love him. They obviously don't love Gator because that's the way it should be!

Morbid smirks as he makes his way to his seat next to the flamboyant host who is wearing a pink, purple and white silk plaid suit and burgundy shoes. Morbid eyeballs him for a second before taking a seat and the crowd falls to silence.



Graham Norton-"Lovely for you to join us today. I bet it is warmer here than in Russia this time of year. So tell me how you became the Universal champion in the XWF. I bet its a jolly good story."



Morbid sits quietly and looks around not really sure what to say being slightly taken back by Graham's odd appearance.



Graham Norton-"Come come now, speak up let us all feel what you feel! Being Morbid Angel must be frightening work! You even look scary in real life. What kind of make up do you use to make your face look like that? Is it Rimmel?"




Graham says as he makes a disgusted face towards the audience as they chuckle in unison. Morbid noticed the joke on his appearance and did no appreciate but acted civil.




Morbid Angel-"I don't use Make-up. This is just how my face looks. I was burned a few times and I'm almost 50 so age will get you in the end."



Graham Norton-"Well, i'm in my 50's and I don't look as bad as you do, moisturizer my good man. Saves the day!"



Morbid Angel-"Right...anyway, yeah."



Graham Norton-"They tell me you are from Russia. How was that growing up? All that hardcore communist action, must have been splendid!"



Morbid Angel-"My mother was a prostitute who was killed before my very eyes when I was 10."



Graham Norton-"...OK! I am sure you are just joking about that. It couldn't have been that bad?"



Morbid Angel-"After the men raped my mother they cut on one of her breasts and threw it at me. Before burning me and slashing my face. I woke up to see my mother hang herself in the living room. She was a whore."




Graham looked around at the prompters to see if there were anything else he could talk about that wouldn't be so depressing.




Graham Norton-"Anyway, you have a son, Zander I believe his name is? How is it being a father?"



Morbid Angel-"Xerces. His name is Xerces! And he's a !"



Graham lets out a nervous chuckle




Graham Norton-"I am sure you don't mean that in a negative way."



Morbid Angel-"I can't confirm if he is a . He sure as Hell acts like a !"



Graham Norton-"What about the boy's mother?"



Morbid Angel-"She died several years ago. I didn't even know I had a son until a year ago. The state took him after she died and Shane helped me find him, even though I wasn't even fucking looking! I got custody of Xerces for a few months and then they took him away from me because they said I was a bad father. I'll tell you what, I was just trying to raise a fucking man and this little girl just cried all the time. Make him sleep outside in the snow and all of a sudden I am a bad guy. It's bullshit! All that shit you see in the news about good fathering is just propaganda! I never had a father and look at me. I am perfect! I am successful! and I have the Universal championship in my possession! You know what weak children make other than ?"




Graham swallows hard not sure what will exit Morbid Angel's mouth next.




Graham Norton-"What would that be?"




Morbid pulls a cloth from his pocket and wipes away a finger print that he caught a glimpse of while talking and wipes it away.


Morbid Angel-"Gator!"




Graham looked shocked considering the defeat Gator has over Morbid Angel and now Morbid is putting Gator beneath the homosexuals? Graham is left wondering I there was a hidden compliment in there somewhere for gays that he didn't catch.




Graham Norton-"Gayta? But he is a national hero! The Queen even gave him his own day. Ever hear of "Great May GayGay Day"?"



Morbid Angel-"What the fuck? NO! That shit just sounds gay!"



Graham Norton-"Well it is a very gay day. A lot of parties and parades. I plan on going this year dressed up like a Gayta fan boi! Wearing me little knickas with his name across the bum and a little mask. It will be marvelous!"



Morbid Angel-" You do nothing to persuade my current feelings of the thing."



Graham Norton-"So you are having a match against our beloved Gayta, care to speak about him? It would be so exciting if you would! It would be like I was apart of the XWF!"



Morbid Angel-"Where should I start? The man lies about using steroids and even after I proved him wrong he continued to spew bullshit that he doesn't use. It's not that hard to see that he is an abuser of many different drugs. Were talking the use of steroids mixed with the obvious synthol that seems to be injected on the daily gives him those muscles that pop. There is nothing I hate more than liars when it comes to steroids! People in wrestling consider themselves above everyone and lie about using when it is a well known fact that steroids is in the XWF and through out wrestling and those who deny using are fooling themselves. Do you think for a minute that I am the only user of steroids in the XWF? Seriously? Considering that there are men here that are almost as big as I am who consider themselves stronger than me. They are liars! Gator is a liar!"



Graham Norton-"If I recall last time you and Gayta had a match you did bring up his steroid abuse and he told you that you were very wrong. What makes you think you are right?"



Morbid Angel-"Simply because of the fact that he denied it so hard without even looking at the facts. I am a good many things, most of them bad but I did go to medical school, I also wrote a book on the true effects of steroids back in 1997 called "LOOK AT MY FUCKING MUSCLES!". Sold over 5 million copies and it doesn't matter if I bought half of them they are still sales! I KNOW MY STEROIDS!"




Graham Norton-"I can see this, you are also very aggressive. I kinda like that in a man!"



Graham says as he gets more comfortable with Morbid Angel again which quickly faded away when Morbid gave him the look, the trademarked look that will end all looks! The look that is now known as "The Look of Looking!"






Morbid Angel-"I killed a man once, he is dead now."



Graham Norton-"OK, what does that mean? Like dead dead?"



Morbid Angel-"Just stating the facts. I, in fact, killed a man. Well, if you want to get technical I killed many people but nothing I would like to talk. Unless you want me to?"


Graham Norton-"No, I don't think we can talk about all that. The station might not like that idea."



Morbid Angel-"OK, I'll tell you a little story that was quite recent. Let me start at a good spot where all the action begins."



Graham Norton-"Please don't"



Morbid Angel-"It was a few weeks ago when I just came back to the XWF after leaving the CWF............................"



The scene wavers off into a dream like state taking Morbid Angel back in time to his town in Morbidonia right after putting two CWF wrestlers to sleep for a few hundred years. Everyone had left him alone and now Morbid stands alone, bleeding in the streets from multiple wounds that were not life threatening, just a lot of deep scratches and cuts that would kill normal men but not Morbid Angel! Being twice the size of any ordinary pussy man, he also has the strength of 9 horses and feels almost no pain. One time he stubbed his toe and walked away like it was nothing, who cares if it was just nerve damage! Morbid Angel is unstoppable! As the heavy snow fell covering the roads and nothing but the moon light in the sky, Morbid Angel makes his way through the darkness to find the ones he is looking for. The snow up to his knees in the street and trudging without a jacket in -10 degree weather. Morbid didn't care! His cold Russian blood made this feel like a warm summer day! In fact it was so warm to him Morbid removed his shirt to keep from over heating. The cold quickly clotted his wounds with ice and allowed him to continue. His nipples were erect pointing like daggers ready to impale any who attacks him.

Through the snow and ice he marches on! In the distance you could almost hear the sounds of triumphant music giving him power, giving him drive! Something good like a nice power ballad!

After a long walk in the snow Morbid Angel arrives at his house on the top of Peck Mountain, an old Victorian Mansion that was left long abandoned before he saved it from impending demolition by nature! The 10 room old funeral home dated back to the 1800's and that is what made Morbid want it that much more, the age and the everlasting death that is in it's history. Death is the answer to all life and those who refuse it will meet it anyway, everyone passes through once.

Morbid stands at the top of his driveway looking down at his house, the lights so bright that you could almost believe it was day time except for the eternal blackness surrounding the vast property making it look like the last place on earth. Morbid looks at the sky as the snow started to join with ice and pelt him, icicles form from his rock hard nipples, his hair frozen in a solid sheet, his goatee matted with ice but his face was determined! Determined to finish what he set out to do hours ago. To get Billy off his fucking land! And to be the best goddamn Universal Champion of all fucking time! Nothing will stop this champion! not even a little ice snow and rain! Fuck you God! I am your master! He mutters into the cloud of white as it pelts his face. He turns his attention to the his home knowing someone was inside, he knows the key to end all this was inside his house. Morbid walks towards the house and watches through the windows knowing that their ability to see out is at a disadvantage to his ability to see in. The darkness always wins! Morbid uses his superior Spetsnaz training to make his way into the house without being heard, he walks in through the back door leading into the embalming room. The heavy doors and insulated walls keep all the noise confined to this floor.

In the dark he makes his way to the large sliding door that opens up to the lower staircase which leads to the main floor and the grand staircase. Slowly opening it just enough to creep his large frame through he makes his way up the stairs without so much as a creak in the wood and looks around, his ability to smell where the intruders were at kicks in! His training also gives him the ability to smell out fear! As different hormones are released into the body which come from fear, the body gives off a smell that can only be caught by gods and well trained Spetsnaz operatives. You decide which you are dealing with.

Morbid jogs up the master staircase and peeks over the banister and sees those filthy bastards that thought there was safety in his house!

He makes his way into an adjoining room as his two invaders search room to room looking for the noise. It would seem the hunters are now the hunted! As the two walked back into the hallway Morbid Angel steps out into the light and is seen in all his tattooed and frozen glory! Screams are heard as Morbid flicks an icicle from his right nipple and Morbid attacks like a lion who had just cornered his prey! No one survives! The laws of the land and who said Morbidonia would be any different. Victory Forever, mother fucker!


Things go fuzzy again as Morbid finishes the story and is chuckles to himself and looks proud of his story! Graham Norton looks on in awe mixed with mild disgust. The story dripping with raunchy lies made it so hard to swallow that not even Austin Fernando could deep throat that cock of a fiction!



Graham Norton-"Mate, I think you need help. Find Jesus, what ever it is that you need please do it."



Morbid Angel-"I have another story for you. It's a time when I was embalming someone and they moved and Vinnie Lane shit his pants! It's good stuff!"


Graham Norton-"Well, that's all the time we have today! I'll be back tomorrow with someone else that's not a tosser!"



Morbid Angel-"Why you dirty mother fucking cunt! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"




Graham Norton gets up and runs from the stage with Morbid Angel swinging the Universal title over his head like a helicopter blade trying to hit him with the gold plated steel that makes victory so sweet! Morbid then cracks it like a towel in a high school locker room and a loud SMACK is heard followed by Graham Nortons' cries.






The scene cuts in to Graham Norton sitting alone on the stage, a bag of ice under his ass and a uncomfortable look on his face.



Graham Norton-"As you all know, Morbid Angel was here today and things didn't go as planned, he insulted our country's GayGay day in horour of Gayta. Then he told a complete fabricated story about protecting his town in Morbidonia like he was Brian Williams. I had the misfortune of listening to his fraudulent story only to get my director to confirm the true accounts of his tales. As you could guess it it wasn't exactly what had happened. During the last Pay Per View in the XWF called "Turning Point". Here is the account that was officially recorded during the Turning Point time frame. Starting at the moment that Morbid Angel was alone."



Everything fizzles off into almost a dream as now once again you have an overactive imagination that is capable of seeing shit like it is actually happening.

Morbid Angel is seen laying in the snow curled in a ball trying to stay warm. His jacket is missing and he was bleeding badly from a few stab wounds he suffered from Rigor Mortis, another disgruntled CWF employee. Morbid Angel with his known medical background took off his shirt in the below freezing weather in an attempt to stop the bleeding. The freezing wind was cold enough to make your nostrils stick together and would freeze his wounds so they would stop bleeding. Almost unable to move Morbid crawls through the snow like a human groundhog, tunneling through the tall snowbanks.

After hours of tunneling he pops his head up from the snow, his head is white with a pile of snow packed onto his head, his face is covered in snow with only his dark eyes piercing through as he dusts himself off he starts to shake from the cold. As he looks down at his own house he lets out a sigh of relief as he begins to run for the front door and barrels in, landing in the foyer laying on his back as he kick slams the door shut!

He starts to laugh as he slowly gets to his feet and sees Billy's two sons staring at him from half way up the stairs, Morbid abruptly stops laughing and stairs at them. One of the boys found Morbid Angel's taser laying around the house somewhere, the boy holds it out in front with evil in his eyes as he presses the button sending the crackling sounds to Morbid Angel's ears, a warning of things coming! The two boys lunge at Morbid Angel and fight like wild dogs against the behemoth. Biting and kicking him, Morbid grabs one of the boys and rips him off and throws him into the wall rendering him unconscious. Morbid laughs as the other boy brings the taser up to his throat and presses the button sending volts of electricity coursing through Morbid's body and giving that he was wet it also shocked the boy dropping them both to the floor!

Some time passes and Morbid sits up and looks around, both boys are still out cold, he feels his neck and touches the taser burn before raising his fists in victory...against a 10 and 12 year old boys. VIctory For Someone!