“So you don’t care the slightest bit that Davids is six feet under?” This stunning girl asked me. She had dazzling blond locks and perky symmetrical breasts. Unfortunately I could not remember her name. That made things rather… awkward? I suppose.

“How do you even know about him?” I asked, readjusting my tie whilst taking another swig of Jack Daniels whisky.

I had set up this staff party because the people who work here had made me filthy rich after all.

“Do not change the subject,” she said whilst grasping my glass of whisky and refilling it before taking a swig herself and passing it back, “answer the question.”

“No, I don’t care,” I said, squinting slightly.

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why don’t you care about the man that you backed!? You said the guy lived with you!” She shouted, standing up. Luckily there was not a scene caused as we were in my office with the blinds and curtains drawn. Complete privacy, but the music from the party could still be heard. Even alcoholic Micky had a drink, and ended up in the closet with Margaret, the sixty year old receptionist. Jesus.

“Caring…Caring…” I pondered, “it only leads to one thing.”

I took another swig of whisky, my words begun to become more slurred. Gemma, her name was Gemma, I think?!

“Well, are you going to tell me what?” She asked, softly.

“It makes you vulnerable. If people know what you care about, or what you love, they won’t target you, they’ll target whatever it is you hold closest to you,” I said, straightening my tie again.

“I cared once before, and well, it left me a mess. It took me what seemed like forever to move on and regain any charisma I once had back. This is the end result.” Of course I referred to the love of my life. Whom I clearly did not want to describe. Saying her name was the most tortuous pain of all, and I would be damned if Gemma is going to worm it out of me. I am not that man anymore. I do not care about people, because caring, makes you weak.

“You never lost that charm of yours Ricky. You would be a fool if you believed otherwise. I understand you went through some painful times, but how can you remain so emotionally bleak now? You truly think that not letting anyone in is the answer to all of your problems? How will you ever experience love again?” Gemma said, wait a second, was her name Gemma? Fuck. I’m starting to think it was Jenna. Surely she’s too hot to be a Gemma? But she seems far too smart to be a Jenna. This cannot be good.

I took another swig of the whisky. Probably getting too drunk for all of this unnecessary deep conversation.

“She’s the only person I ever loved!” I bellowed, smashing the glass into a thousand pieces by launching it at the wall after pushing myself back from the desk.

Gemma, Jenna, or whatever her fucking name was looked terrified.

“I’m sorry… But there is a reason why I do not open up. It makes me feel like this. My veins are bulging out of my body and it feels as though my blood is boiling. The rage for what happened. It does not matter anymore. These things are in the past. This world though, it is not fair. If you begin to care, begin to love. Well, the cruelest things will happen to what you care about because that’s exactly what the world does.”

“It is the harshest of places,” she said sweetly whilst trying to smile but a tear trickled down her face.

I sat back down, and wiped away the tear with my thumb before handing her a handkerchief from my pocket square.

“Why are you crying, Jenna?” I took a punt.

“It’s just sad to see someone who is clearly torn apart by the world. Yet they never show this side of them,” maybe she was not as thick as most Jenna’s, either that or she misheard me when I said her name before.

“My mother always told me that things happen for a reason, and I never bought into any of that. It does though. There’s a reason that happened. It happened so I could become a better person. A stronger person. To do that, I do not need to care, or to love. It is merely a distraction. Letting people grasp onto what you love? Well now, that’s not okay. Now, this is getting rather depressing, what do you say we go and dance?” I smirked, and grabbed her by the hand and took her into the conference room.

It was 3am, and we started drinking at about 8pm. It seemed as though the party had basically died down, but I put on “Another Love by Tom Odell”. Jess, the sexy assistant, was dancing with the second best looking guy in the office (after myself, of course). I think his name was Gary but that’s a shit name and he was only a temp so who gives a fuck?

He winked at me though, which was odd, and they left. Everyone had left. Except alcoholic Micky and the boss, Christopher. Micky was chundering into the washing up bowl, Christopher was merely sighing whilst trying to get him to leave.

So it was just us. Well us and the camera men, but how the fuck would anyone see this without camera men?

I held her hips and we slowly moved from side to side, she lent into my shoulder and I smiled whilst looking out of the window into the most beautiful city in the world, London.

There was a billboard, advertising the XWF with a picture of John Samuels and Steve Davids on it from Turning Point. Obviously they hadn’t changed the billboard yet.

I squinted, and smiled.

Jenna looked up at me.

“What are you smirking about?”

“There is no reason to care, really. However, there is always a reason to achieve.”

We stopped for a moment, and looked into each other’s eyes.

She went in for the kiss, and at first, I was reluctant. I knew it was a mistake but I kissed back anyway.

The track ended, as did the kiss. I grabbed the keys and took Jenna by the hand as we left. The office was a mess, perhaps I wouldn’t bother coming in tomorrow.

I whistled down a cab after locking the office.

It turns out alcoholic Micky was still in the building, he fell down the stairs just as we were leaving. He fell asleep there and was found still out cold when Sara opened up in the morning.

As I was about to whistle for a cab, Jenna stopped me.

“It’s just a few blocks away, let’s walk,” she said with a smile, putting her hand inside my jacket pocket and linking arms with me.

We didn’t say anything for a while, merely looked up at the starlit sky.

Stopping outside of her house, I smiled and she smiled back.

“Do you want to come in for coffee?” She asked, basically asking if I wanted to fuck her brains out.

As much as I did want to fuck her, and as much as I did genuinely fancy a coffee, I knew it was a bad idea.

I think I actually liked her.

“That’s not a good idea,” I said, surprising myself.

“Right answer,” she nodded.

As Jenna begun to stroll away, with her beautiful ass moving from side to side, I said one word.

“Isabella.”

She turned and looked at me to reveal dazzling white teeth. Probably the only English person on the planet with seemingly perfect teeth.

Perfectly, she pecked me on the lips, before whispering into my ear.

“Maybe you will care again.”

I doubted it.

Smiling, I strutted home, I was working purely on adrenaline, despite being fucking shattered.

I was out like a light as soon as I got home, and I dreamed of absolutely nothing other than extreme chaos.

Zzzzzzz

Zzzzzzz

Zzzzzzz

I awoke, to an interviewer sat in my living room. If it’s fucking Steve Sayors I will rip his head off.

“Have you done your research on Maverick?”

I was barely fucking awake. I was still wearing the same fucking suit as the night before. AND IT WAS FUCKING STEVE SAYORS IN FUCKING LONDON! THIS GUY IS EVERYWHERE!

“Sorry, who the fuck is Maverick, and what the fuck are you doing in my house?” I knew who Maverick was, but I didn't want him or the fans to know that.

“Your door and gate were wide open...”

“Just like your sister’s legs,” still funny, even if I am hanging out of my ass.

“Yeah, I don’t have a sister.”

“I haven’t done any research on Maverick, and I haven’t done any research on you. I really do not give a fuck about him. All I DO know is that I need to put that worthless lump of cunt through a burning table.”

“Our editing team are going to have their work cut out for them…”

“Oh please Steve, get on with the questions, your sister is waiting upstairs.”

“I don’t have a sister.”

“Yeah but come on.”

I don’t even know what I was saying.

“Why are you back?”

“Steve, I made a mistake when I backed someone else. I made a mistake in thinking I should or could rely on other people to take my place at the top. I always thought that there was no way I would be taking a place on top of the throne. I thought I was destined to help someone else climb to the top of the mountain. Well I am done with helping other people out. Ricky Desmond is ALL about Ricky Desmond.”

“Now if you don’t mind, I am going back to bed, to fuck your sister.”

I headed up stairs. Jenna was at her house, and she switched off the television and looked down at the ground, a single tear trickled down her face. She bit her lip and begun to regret thinking that maybe she had changed me.

I could not allow myself to care, otherwise I would become weak.