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X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » "Anarchy Special" RP Board
Fucking Finally
Author Message
AerialKnight Offline
The Knight that Fights with Honor



XWF FanBase:
Some men, some teens, few women

(the villain you love to hate; has cult following)


#1
12-26-2014, 12:15 AM

"So Gator finally takes himself seriously for a change. Too bad many of the insults he threw at me end up falling flat on their face, but hey, it's something. Now that he actually has a serious side to show, I might as well tear out a page from a Deadpool comic that I own and show it to you, just so I can compare him to his costume."

The sounds of paper being torn out of a book can be heard as Johnathan pulls out a page from the only Deadpool comic he owns. Tears shed from comic book nerds everywhere as he does this. When finished, he shows the specific part of the comic where Wade is being serious.

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"Hmm...no, I don't see it. Maybe it's because I don't imagine that dipshit or his cameramen being in my nightmares. Better luck next time."


We fade in on the Aerial Knight, Johnathan Heartsford, taking a drag from a cigarette outside of his hotel room on Christmas night. It's cold as hell outside and he's not wearing a jacket to protect himself from the harsh winter winds. Even though his hair is flying against his face and blocking his vision from any incoming flying projectiles, he still stands there while blowing smoke rings out into the night sky. The hairs on his arms are raised and goosebumps form on his exposed skin the longer he stays outside. He then takes a few seconds to unwrap his cigarette, which wasn't even lit at all, and eat it's contents.

Turns out, the cigarette is nothing more than a chocolate cigarette that kids would use to fool their parents. After fooling the audience and his parents back in Baltimore, Johnathan puts the trash in his pocket and walks back inside, closing the door once both feet are inside the room. He shivers and exhales deeply, trying, and failing, to warm himself up after being in the cold for what looks like a good while. He pops some stiff bones before even acknowledging the Cambot. When he does, he doesn't smile, he doesn't laugh, and he doesn't even try to crack a joke.


"So, Jacob, you finally decided to stop dicking around and actually take this shit seriously for a change. Actually wait, no you didn't, you opened up with a Chutes and Ladders history lesson that somehow ended up about a comparison that we were the mice and you're an actual fucking Gator. Yes, we get it, you and I have said that you are an excellent fighter and have the skills necessary to prove that. There's no fucking need to repeat what we already know, man. It's like telling us our names after college, that information is useless to people with a brain. You want to know something else? Something new and refreshing? Something that will probably blow your mind once you hear it because it's so true? Until you grow the fuck up and become the wrestler that your dad wanted you to be, there's no denying that I'll be able to beat you in that ring with the move that everyone can avoid to take the belt that you still call yours."

"Yes, even I'm calling my move easy to avoid, because I'm not the fucking dolt that you think I am. I know that anyone in their right mind can avoid a Shooting Star Press because everyone fucking knows how to avoid a move made famous by both Jushin Lyger and Billy Kidman. It's like any other dive to a grounded opponent, you can either move the fuck out of the way or put your knees up. It's common knowledge at this point. But why am I so confident that I can knock you out with this move, the one move everyone can say that they avoided?"

"An easy question with an easier answer. I want you to listen to yourself for a brief moment, see if you can find the error for yourself. Cambot."


BEEP BEEP.

"Replay footage: 'Let the Games Begin'."

The Cambot switches from filming Johnathan Heartsford to replaying some footage from Gator's recent promo.

Gator the Amazingly Stupid Douchebag Said:"OOH, you get a bit of an attitude here. What's up Knight? Getting a little tense? Knowing that belt you don't deserve is going to be gone very, very soon. Haha, you know what, I don't give a fuck what you think about me. You honestly don't mean shit to me. We're not friends, I'm just a nice dude when I want to be. I can be a real mother fucker when I want to be too by the way. Yeah, I can be the worst fucking person you've ever met in your goddamn life when I want to be, I'm usually pretty laid back and fun loving. But, if you really want to see the side of me that would rip your legs off and beat you and your entire fucking family to death with those skinny little legs, then just go ahead and keep being a fucking . Makes no goddamn difference to me."

We cut back to Johnathan Heartsford looking way too serious for his own good.

"If that in it's entirety doesn't spew arrogance, it certainly spews bullshit. I don't need to put on a stupid helmet and pull out a 'Tard Card like your current cameramen do in those games you're having them play. I can bring out your serious side by simply not cracking a smile and by calling you girlfriend a whore. Oh, I'm sorry, you only think I do that to white women? It's just joke after joke with you. Here, I have some pictures of women of different nationalities, who just so happen to be friends of my sister's. Just watch what I do."

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"She's a whore because she decided to let her husband photograph her feeding her baby. See what she's doing? She's showing a breast. If that doesn't scream out whore, you clearly have no culture."

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"She's a whore because she tried to hit on me, my dad, and everyone else in the neighborhood because 'we'd all look good half naked.' While a compliment, she has managed to lure some of those men she used the very same pickup line on to her bed. And just in case you're wondering, she's now the mother of quintuplets."

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"You know the pattern by now. This woman is notorious for posting pictures of mostly her breasts and posting them to Facebook. Fucking attention whore."

He proceeds to toss away all three pictures and looks straight back at the flying camera.

"As you can see, I'm not a racist, I'm a misogynist. I only need the evidence necessary to call them out on it, much like your Scarlet, for example. She had slept with seven other men before you came along and became smitten. Hell, what makes you think that you'll be able to keep her interested long enough before she leaves you for someone that doesn't have this crazy of a life? True love? I haven't seen her return your emotions once since you two got together. If anything, she treats you like some guy at a party she met that won't leave her the fuck alone."

He proceeds to walk over to the mini fridge and pull out a can of generic brand soda. He opens the can and takes a quick swig before continuing.

"In your opinion, I'm not the number one contender? Management and archives would like to think otherwise. You saw the undeniable squash match against me and Dickie, it was for the chance to win your title because for whatever reason, we were the only two men in the locker room ballsy enough to think that we can take you down. Sane? He didn't even bother to talk about you, me, or anyone else in that match because he either had plans or was too distracted by the pretty colors of the stadium. And he might be next in line after I take you out. I say might, because he still has to fight the young and green Adrian Storms and the veteran Tony Santos. In my opinion, those two have a much better chance to get to me than Sane does. And my opinion is all I need to make it true."

Johnathan proceeds to take another swig out of his soda.

"You see, Gator, I wanted to treat you like Socrates did, I wanted to be friendly towards you in that match until the very end, where we can duke it out like the wrestlers we were born to be. However, I can see now that I have to become Ralphie and beat the shit out of you, Scut Farkus. Yeah, I made a Christmas Story reference, I can play that game as well as anyone else."

He takes one more swig.

"Where you're going with your career, the Gator might as well be sliding down the slides of failure before you think you can beat me. Unless you shed your skin and face me like a man, your rant might as well be the equivalent of a fanboy bitching that they took out his favorite character, pointless and laughable. If you really want this belt back, you have to hurry the fuck up and beat me in those fifteen minutes allotted, otherwise, move on."

He wipes some sand out of his eyes before finishing off the video.

"By the way, I asked MacClay, and he said he did call you about the situation with your belt, but he said it went straight to voicemail. Get your phone out of silent and pick it up, he's not paying you to fuck up. Cambot."

BEEP BEEP.

"Turn the fuck off."

The scene cuts to black.

Singles Win/Lose/Draw
10-13-1

Tag Win/Lose/Draw
3-6-0

“Knighthood lies above eternity; it does not live off fame, but rather deeds.” - Dejan Stojanovic

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