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The Pagoda Report: The Fifth Edition
Author Message
Phillip Pagoda Offline
Registered but either hasn't added self to a roster yet or doesn't RP



XWF FanBase:
Men, some teens

(booed by casual fans; opportunistic; often plays dirty)


#1
12-21-2014, 02:17 PM

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Welcome to the fifth edition of XWF's 'The Pagoda Report.' Wow! We're already at the FIFTH edition! I am your host, Phillip Pagoda. Today we are discussing everything from Madness to Warfare to The X-Treme 25 which will rank everyone according to their performances at the past four events and not counting Christmas Shove-It. Will you disagree with me? I'm sure you shall. Alas, this is according to my rubric. I also have an interview portion that will wrap up 'The Pagoda Report.' Now... let's get started shall we?

Universal Championship
Champion: Steve Davids

1. John Samuels
2. Theo Pryce
3. Justin Sane
4. Azrael Erebus
5. ‘Loverboy’ Vinnie Lane



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World Tag Team Championship
Champions: 'A Pest and His Mummy' - Pest/Mr. WG.WF & JACK

1. ‘The Kings’ – John Samuels & Theo Pryce
2. ‘The Mean Girls’ – Iris Oppenheimer & Jessie Diaz
3. ‘An Alien Force’ – Azrael Erebus & Jaws
4. ‘Frosty Silence’ – TJ Wallace & Jet Frost
5. ‘Two Man Mission’ – Scotty Anderson & Tommy Wish


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X-Treme Championship
Champion: Doctor Louis D'Ville

1. Peter Gilmour
2. Ghost Tank
3. TJ Wallace
4. Ethan Donovan
5. Ferrari Punk


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Television Championship
Champion: 'The Aerial Knight' Johnathan Heartsford

1. Justin Sane
2. Gator
3. Ghost Tank
4. Morbid Angel
5. TJ Wallace



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Trios Championship
Champion: 'The Three Kings' - Theo Pryce, John Samuels, & John Madison

1. ‘The Underground’ – TJ Wallace & Xavier Swann & Johnathan Heartsford
2. ‘The Asylum’ – Hysteria & Ghost Tank & Frodo Smackins
3. ‘Defiance’ – Justin Sane & Gator & CorVus
4. ‘The Corporation’ – Swagmire & Scully & Mr. WG.WF/Pest
5. ‘Maverick & Friends’ – Maverick & Dustin Cage & Leon Cage



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The Prophetic Belt of The Almighty Higher Power Championship
Champion: Hysteria

1. Xavier Swann
2. JACK
3. Jaws
4. Ruben A. Mitchell
5. TRHP


The X-Treme 25

1. 'The Aerial Knight' Johnathan Heartsford

2. Justin Sane

3. Steve Davids

4. Theo Pryce

5. Mr. WG.WF




6. Jack

7. Azrael Erebus

8. Hysteria

9. Frodo Smackins

10. Morbid Angel




11. Gator

12. Xavier Swann

13. John Samuels

14. ‘Loverboy’ Vinnie Lane

15. Peter Gilmour




16. TJ Wallace

17. Ghost Tank

18. Kendall Sawyer

19. ???

20. Ruben A. Mitchell



21. Jaws

22. Mastermind

23. Scully

24. Ethan Donovan

25. TRHP



Match of the Weeks

Theo Pryce vs. Eli James vs. Peter Gilmour


Wrestler of the Weeks

Steve Davids


Promo of the Weeks


"I BET YOU WOULD!" - Morbid Angel






Welcome one and all to the interview portion of The Pagoda Report. I am, as always, Phillip Pagoda and today I am joined by one of the most impactful rookies that we've seen in the last few months. Please help me in welcoming... Mr. Justin Sane!

Thanks for having me, Phillip.

Thank you for gracing my show with your presence, sir. Now my first question is the hardest I'll have... how are you doing today, Mr. Sane?

In all honesty? I've never been better. Two weeks ago, I beat Vincent Lane one on one and finally silenced my critics. Last week, I took down Ethan Donovan and the XWF Star of the Month, Mastermind, in a three way dance and just in case you missed it? Wednesday night, I finally put the Asylum back in there place. Things have never been better.

Excellent, Mr. Sane. Now as we saw on Warfare, it seems that you've joined forces with Gator and this newcomer, CorVus I believe? Now can you tell us something about this new... alliance of sorts?

Alliance? This is no alliance, Pagoda. This is Defiance. For too long now, the Asylum have run roughshod over the XWF. They've stuck their nose in my business. They've stuck their nose in Gator's business, and as for CorVus? Well, let's just say that he has more reason than most to paint a target on the back of the Asylum. Their days of strutting around like they own this place, are over. We are going to make sure of that.

Defiance... an interesting name for this new group. Is this defiance in authority as a whole or strictly defiance in The Asylum?

Let me put it to you like this, Phillip. Defiance stands against anybody and everybody who stands between us, and what we want. What we deserve, what is rightfully ours. Right now, the Asylum is making a habit of getting between us and our end game. They are like a nail sticking out of a board that stops you from running your hand across it. What do you do to said nail? You hit it on the head. Hard.

Are you not afraid of the sheer numbers of The Asylum? There are only three of you and... an exorbitant amount of Asylum members after all.

Afraid? No. Aware? Yes. Don't get it twisted, Pagoda. We are under no illusions about what we are up against. Can the Asylum say the same thing? I seriously doubt it. They have no idea who they are dealing with and what we are capable of. You saw yourself on Wednesday night, CorVus single handedly took out all five members. There may be strength in numbers, but Defiance knows no limitations.

A very confident Mr. Sane. Very interesting. Now let's digress for a moment. Who has been your favorite opponent? And who has been your most challenging?

They are one and the same. Vinnie Lane was by far the toughest, as I expected him to be. By the same token, defeating him on Madness two weeks ago and shutting him up was easily the most satisfying moment I have had in the ring thus far.

Well it's good you finally got a match to pull you to the limits. But in order to completely assess you we have to discuss the low points as well. King of the Ring, what happened?

If only I knew. Truth is, I have no idea what happened. Maybe I was complacent. Maybe I got a bit ahead of myself after riding the high of my debut at War Games. Whatever the reason, you can rest assured that it won't be happening again. That week was one momentary lapse in a career that will be littered with success. Of that, you can rest assured.

I take with that answer we need not get into the title match. But speaking of titles, which title are you next going to target? Television again or Trios? Or maybe another?

The million dollar question. I'm glad you asked. Here's the thing, Phil... I'm not here to waste my own time. I know how good I am. I know what I want, and I know how to get it. Defeating Vinnie Lane wasn't confirmation for me that I belong at the top end of the food chain, it was confirmation for the world. You know, I noticed that on Wednesday night, a guy by the name of Steve Davids caused quite a stir by cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase. I hope he enjoys his reign at the top while it lasts, because it won't be forever. You can call it arrogance. You can call it false hope. I call it a spoiler. Sooner rather than later, you will see my name up in lights. If anybody disagrees, then by all means... come and prove me wrong.

Is this you throwing your hat into the Universal Title picture?! That's phenomenal! That being said, do you wait until after John Samuels fights Steve Davids or do you challenge Davids?

I'm not just throwing my hat in it, you're seeing the entire wardrobe fly through the air. It makes no difference to me who I have to face to get my shot. Be it Samuels, Gilmour, Azrael… it's irrelevant. You reporters like scoops in these interviews, right? You like exclusives? I'm telling you that before long, Justin Sane WILL be the XWF Universal Champion. It's like two plus two, Pagoda, it's just that damn simple. Now I know the XWF locker room will be out in chorus, slinging their jaws about how one victory doesn't put me in the title picture. What, they think I don't know that? I'm not asking for a title shot next week. I'll earn it, don't worry. But the result at the end of it all is a foregone conclusion.

Indeed that is a fantastic announcement, but who's your next opponent? Who do you most want to take care of next?

Well before I sink my teeth into that Universal Title picture, I have one last piece of business to take care of. That jakked up, neon green hair freak, Ghost Tank, has been ducking me since day one. He's got more excuses than a fucking lawyer, seriously. He keeps bringing up the fact that he was the MVP for Team Eli at War Games, when we all know that is bullshit. I plan on showing him once and for all who the real MVP truly was.

Justin Sane vs. Ghost Tank. Winner proves that he is the MVP of Team Eli. That sounds like a fantastic match! Plus it also goes with your agenda deconstructing The Asylum. Now here's an off topic question... where's Evertrust? It seemed like you two were buddy-buddying, but he's been nowhere to be seen.

You tell me, Pagoda. The honest truth is, I am as clueless as everyone else. While we are on the topic though, let's get something straight once and for all. I was never riding Evertrust's coat tails. He hand-picked me. He asked for my help. Seems everyone has got this whole thing twisted... I never needed Evertrust, he needed Justin Sane. So to answer your question, I don't know... And frankly? I don't really care.


You made quite the splash in that first match. Are you surprised that Eli never enacted revenge on you?

Am I surprised? Not really. Truth is, I'm actually impressed. What it tells me is that Eli is smarter than most people in the XWF locker room. He understands a lost cause when he sees one. Coming after yours truly would have been a fatal error, so I commend Eli for making the right decision. He understands that it wasn't personal. Strictly business.

A bold statement by my guest this week. Well I think that about wraps things up. Thank you for joining me today, Mr. Sane. Do you have any parting words?

If you thought my statements in this interview were bold, wait until you see what happens next. This script is about to be flipped inside out. The landscape has changed, and Defiance is the new benchmark. Don't say we didn't warn you.

Once again, I would like to thank my young and hungry guest, Mr. Justin Sane. That will end the interview portion of The Pagoda Report.


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Well that about sums up 'The Pagoda Report' for this period. Be sure to join us in two weeks as we have the next edition of 'The Pagoda Report.'

Thank you for joining me and step up your work. For everyone shall be assessed and assimilated.


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