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X-treme Wrestling Federation » Warfare Boards » Warfare RP Board
A Bastard and A Fucking Chair!
Author Message
Joey Hawkins Offline
Back and better than ever!



XWF FanBase:
Mixed reactions

(cheered heavily at home; hated by some; dips between clean/dirty)


#1
11-16-2014, 01:50 PM

OOC: Scene opens up to Joey Hawkins skateboarding at a Las Vegas skate park while a cameraman records him

Skateboarding. A favorite hobby of mine.

-Hawkins performs an Ollie-

You could say I'm an old pro at this.

-Hawkins goes to the top of a ramp and performs a kick flip before heading back down-

I've been riding boards ever since the seventh grade. Growing up in Vegas, almost every kid skateboarded.

-Hawkins grinds a pipe but doesn't land properly and falls off the board-

Son of a bitch!

-A gash is then seen on Hawkins' left elbow. Blood slowly pours from it-

Well, that's skateboarding for you. You get injured and then you're done. Kind of like wrestling except there's less pussies. See for yourself

-Hawkins points to some twelve year old trying to go up a ramp-

That kid is gonna eat it

-Almost after a second Hawkins says this, the kids falls off his board and starts bawling.

See, that kid is a pussy. When I was twelve, I didn't burst into tears when my mommy wasn't there to hold me.

-Hawkins gets lost in thought-

Come to think of it, I don't think my mom was ever there for me. Anyway, let's not get off topic. Time to focus on my two opponents; Mastermind and his chair

First off, let's talk about that bitch Mastermind. The destroyer of minds or whatever. I faced this loser before my retirement, and I lost. It was a very balanced match,but somebody had to come out a winner, and unfortunately,that person wasn't me. Now, he's bragging on how he forced me into my retirement. I'll tell you one thing, that certainly did not influence my retirement in the slightest. A lot of things were on my mind at the time, and I just had to leave for a while. Now, I'm back and I'm ready to kick that dirty bastard's ass.

Then, my second opponent. A chair. Really, a fucking chair? Is that seriously what I'm going up against? First of all, how the fuck can a chair be able to talk? I'm puzzled as fuck right now. Second of all, what makes that fucking piece of shit think he's going to beat two humans? It just doesn't add up. That chair is gonna be sorry though because I'm going to break it in mini tiny pieces. Or light it on fire. Either way, I'm going to make sure that chair can never walk, I mean scoot ever again.

-Hawkins walks away from the camera-

-mutters- Fucking bullshit. A fucking chair. Are they kidding me?

-Camera fades to black-

[Image: OuzNj8Z.png]

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