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Theo Pryce · **11-06-2014, 06:51 PM**

Wow. Let's get right down to the nitty gritty and address the steroid infused elephant in the room.

Morbid Angel flat out admitting that our team is near unbeatable. First Morbid I want to thank you for the compliment. That was really nice of you. More than that though it was surprising to hear you say something that is even remotely true. Notice I said remotely and not completely. Because the complete truth is that our team is not near unbeatable. It is completely and totally without a doubt, 100% unbeatable. Your team if you want to even call it that has as much of a shot of winning this match as Frodo does of winning a slam dunk contest. And no, I’m not talking about a slam dunk contest with 4 year olds using a Little Tykes Play Like A Pro Basketball Hoop that you can buy at any Wal Mart for 70 bucks either. I’m talking real legit 6 foot 10 black dudes with basketball’s the size of Frodo’s dome slam dunk contest. The kind that Kobe Bryant and Lebron James are too chickenshit to participate in.

But back to you. As I said, it was nice, hell, even refreshing to hear you say something with a hint of truth to it considering your general modus operandi is to lie through your teeth about everything. Case in point…everything else you said in your promo that was directed towards me.

I will admit though, I did have to rewind you promo and watch it a few times because I was so astounded that you would actually allow something as pitiful as that piece of trash to ever make it past the cutting room floor. Seriously. Are you trying to blow it for your team? You gave me so much ammo I may as well just call you Viktor Bout. If you have no idea who that is as I suspect you don’t try using Google.

First lets dispense with the notion that cheating is a bad thing, because it isn’t. In fact you should probably try it more often. You might actually win a match once in a while. Have you actually won a match since the time you won the Universal Title 3 and a half fucking months ago? Outside of War Games because let’s be honest, you would have never won that farce if I had given enough of a shit to show up. And no Morbid you don’t lose because you are getting old, you lose because you suck. Because unlike 99% of the people that walk through the doors of the XWF you’ve managed to get worse over time instead of better. That’s why you never win. Oh but wait, you don’t care about winning, that’s what you just said right? I find that odd coming from someone who spends so much time lying about his record. Example. According to you, you’ve beaten me twice, yet I can’t for the life of me find any evidence that you have beaten me even once let alone twice. And to make matters worse you swear up and down that yours truly refused to admit to having lost to you. I find that not only laughable but completely insane.

Now I will freely admit that I’ve wrestled more than my fair share of matches while either high or drunk, hell sometimes both so my memory isn’t what it used to be. To that end I consulted the XWF history books and do you know what I discovered? That you are equal parts liar and loon. You and I have only ever been in a wrestling ring together once. Do you remember that match? I sure do. Theo Pryce as Enigma versus Morbid Angel with your X-treme Championship on the line. You walked in the champ and was carted out a loser. Something that overtime I think you’ve probably gotten rather used to. So that was the one time we faced each other, and you lost, when was the second time? Or even a third time?

I guess maybe you are considering your teams win at War Games as a victory over me. I mean, I guess in the strictest sense you could try and make that case. That Team Morbid beat Team Theo, ignoring of course the massive caveat that yours truly wasn’t even in the match but for the sake of argument let’s say that actually counts as a win? Where is the other win?

You mentioned a sleep chamber and that was where you officially lost me. Do you have one of those high altitude sleep chambers that the professional athletes like Lebron James and Michael Phelps use? Is that what you are talking about? I guess maybe you could be talking about that weird character swap shove it that happened I don’t even remember when. But you can’t possibly be talking about that because you faced Kinwrathi and Frodo at that event. And I faced Sid Feder and Mandii Rider. Though really it was just Sid. So how did you beat me at that show?

Where you hanging out in one of those online XWF chatrooms and arguing with the world’s biggest Theo mark again? Yeah that’s right Morbid. I’ve heard how you spend your free time. So disenchanted with the fact that no one in the XWF gives a flying fuck about you, you go and troll XWF chatrooms to see if anyone will talk about you there. I guess you think that you hit the jackpot when you saw a Theo mark talking about how awesome his most favorite wrestler is. Tell me Morbid, did you get schooled by the Theo mark as badly as you are getting schooled by the real Theo?

Seriously Morbid, class is in session. Take a seat and shut the fuck up because I’m just getting started. You know what I find most amazing about your aforementioned claims that you’ve beaten me twice when in fact you haven’t even beaten me once? It’s not the actual historical inaccuracy of the claim, no. What really makes me laugh is that according to you I deny the fact that you’ve beaten me twice. Which is true. Now. You see prior to this promo that I am doing right this minute I have never actually addressed on XWF television anywhere our having faced each other because until it was revealed at War Games that I am in fact Enigma, you had no idea that you and I had even ever squared off. So where exactly are these reported denials coming from? Certainly not from me. Must be that Theo mark you were arguing with. You see if you have ever paid attention to anything I’ve ever said you would know that unlike you I never deny when I lose a match. I admitted flat out that I lost to Tony Santos at Leap of Faith, or that I lost the Crown to John Samuels. Hell I’ve lost plenty of matches. I’ve also won a ton.

You claim that you have succeeded at more than I ever could have yet consulting the XWF history books that, like most everything else that comes out of your mouth is a lie. Let’s compare shall we.

Morbid Angel – 2 Time X-treme Champion. Total length of both title reigns: 23 days
Theo Pryce/Enigma – 1 Time X-treme Champion. Total length of time as champ: 30 days.

So in that instance I did in one reign what you couldn’t do in two combined and that’s hold the title for a month’s time.

Moving on.

Morbid Angel – 1 Time Universal Champion. Total reign: 34 days.

Impressive. Longer than Sebastian’s reign and both of Azraels.

Now me, I’ve only been the Universal Champion for a little over a week, so my story isn’t complete there. So I guess what I will have to do is talk about my reign as King of the XWF.

Morbid Angel – 0 time King of the XWF

Theo Pryce – 1 Time King of the XWF. Total reign: 128 days.

Wow.

Not as long as John Madison’s reign but certainly a hell of a lot longer than your reign as Universal Champion, by about 3 and a half months.

But do you know what is even better than that?

Unlike you, I actually defended my title successfully. More than once actually. And yet according to you I am one of the worst Crown holders. In addition to being the weakest X-title holder. So if that is true and I am indeed those things, according to you, than what does that make you? The guy who in two reigns couldn’t hold the X title for as long as I did in my one? Or you the guy who couldn’t defend his Universal Title successfully once while I defended the Crown successfully multiple times. If me having done all those things makes me the worst and the weakest then what does that make you?

Survey says: A joke.

Oh and while we are on the subject of other things I’ve accomplished that you haven’t.

How about winning the United States title. Or the trios titles. And no, your current reign as a Trios champ doesn’t count for shit because you haven’t actually earned that title. It was a gift, just like the time Peter Gilmour was given an AIDs ridden wife. That too was a gift.

How about the fact that I also won the Television Title. I beat the guy that ended Azrael’s nearly year long reign with the TV title. Or how about the fact that I am one of only three people to ever hold three titles simulatenously?

Tell me again about how you’ve accomplished more than me.

Go ahead.

I’ll wait…..

Still waiting...

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