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X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » "WAR GAMES" PPV RP Board
New Zealand Is Getting Old.
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Gator Offline
The Walking Disaster



XWF FanBase:
Mixed

(loved by some; hated by some; dips between clean/dirty)


#1
10-17-2014, 08:40 PM


*Gator sits on the king size bed in Mastermind's guest room. He holds his smart phone in one hand and a lit cigarette in the other. The only light is the moon beaming through the window, as Gator lifts his head and speaks a half a word before cracking into laughter. His giggle dies down and he clears his throat, he takes a drag of the cigarette and looks at the camera*

"OH snap! What a fucking twist! Someone ring up M. Night Shyamalan and tell him we got the new Unbreakable because Frodo is some actor from Leeds! Well fuck a duck."

Frodo from fucking Leeds Said: Fucking sad. Guess I can drop the act, then. I'm not actually from Michigan, and I'm not Frodo. In fact, I'm not even from the United States. I'm from Leeds.

"So, you are admitting you are a fake, a fraud. Cool. So all of your accomplishments don't mean shit, you have done literally nothing here. Unless you're lying again, which I've just come to expect from you. And yet again, Frodo, whether real or fake, switches personalities, this time in a fucking day! So long thug Frodo, hello straight forward to the point Frodo, hello it's so nice to meet you, how long will you be staying with us? A few days maybe? Well, I shall enjoy our time while it lasts."

"Mother fucker I picked up on your pop culture references, everyone picked up on your pop culture references because there fucking pop culture. You don't need to explain them to me like your so smart like you're the only one who got the joke. Everything got the joke. And it's a bad fucking joke. Why does Frodo surround himself in this pop culture nonsense? Is it because he wants to be popular? He wants to be the name on everyone's lips and be a someone. Or is it because Frodo is just like pop culture, something that will stick around while he makes noise but when he's dead and gone no one will give a fuck. Hahaha you actually made me laugh with how your so naive to think Frodo made pop culture his own. Everybody does it in their day to day lives, it's nothing special, just like you. Oh, and I'm the real copycat, again, you trying to steal Luca's shit as well? About the mask even though I wore it years before this whole Lazarus stunt was known to the world. Bitch you can't go around calling the kettle black. You're the real thief, you stole someone's life and think you can actually call shit on someone else. Fuck you."


Frodo from fucking Leeds Said: Fuck, you even stole the Cinnamon bit.

"You not even think for a second I used that to make you jealous or angry? No, I guess you didn't. I like to use anything to my advantage. Frodo's love of Azrael, and Azrael not giving a single fuck about Frodo is good material. I use whatever I can use. But here we go again, I don't want to be anything like you or the real Frodo, I don't give a fuck about you. Rape, another thing you're claiming to be your own because you did it first?"

(01-09-2013, 08:07 PM)C Y R E N Said: might add some rape and torture to pin to-do list

"This was way before me and Frodo, and look at that. This fucker is threatening rape. Yeah, really your own thing isn't it Frodo. Oh, wait I forgot, because I never met cee y ar ee en, I can't bring him up, because there is no such thing as the internet or archived footage so how in the hell can I possibly watch past wrestlers and know about them. You're right Frodo, I never met Sid Feder, but I know he is a big deal and since I've been here I've been doing a lot of digging, I like to know what's underneath the soil of the place I'm in. But wait! You're the fake Frodo right? You never met Feder. So by using your logic, you can't bring him up. Fuck, you can't bring the real Frodo up because like you said."

Frodo from fucking Leeds Said:And I've never had a single day of training in my life. I just watched a lot of Frodo's old promos and matches.

"So, with what you said, you can't bring up the real Frodo because you never met him, you talked to him on the phone but you've never physically met him. So, fake Frodo, stop bringing up people you don't know. It doesn't make you look smart, it just makes you look like a try hard. So with that, what's next? You just going to forget about what you said and carry on pretending to be Frodo, or are you going to do the big reveal and you were the original Frodo all along? Maybe the real Frodo comes back from Belize and teaches me some half assed lesson. You won't surprise me, unless you turn into a dragon that shits rainbows and breathes shit filled condoms, but that's ruined now."

Frodo from fucking Leeds Said:Holy shit, Batman, did you see that coming? No, none of you did. It's been pretty clear to anyone paying attention, and not a one of you figured it out?

"Wrong. Everyone noticed a change in you, even Mastermind did. You're right, I didn't expect there was a fake Frodo, but that doesn't mean it impressed me. In that fucking awful movie The Village, spoilers by the way, I didn't think the village was in present day in some fucking wildlife preserve. I didn't expect it, it doesn't mean it's not . So, everyone noticed this change in you, but none of us cared when the big reveal was shown. Fuck, saying all this is pointless anyway. You're either going to talk back in the lame way that fake Frodo does or your going to say, nothing I say to you matters because you're not the real Frodo but if you say that, nothing you say matters anymore anyway, because you're not the real Frodo. You remember Shades? He came in and made everyone believe he was Angelus, he shocked the world cashing in on Eli James, no one expected that. That, was a good fucking twist. Then he took a blood test and was proved to be a fake, not Angelus. Remember what happened to him next? He got his title revoked and was fired. I hope Shane follows the rules and fires your fake ass too."

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*Gator stares out at the road as he sits with his cheek slumped against his fist, his arm rested on the car door. The engine gently rumbles as he drives through this small New Zealand town. Todd sits in the seat next to him reading a large book about New Zealand. Gator gently taps his fingers on the steering wheel as he listens to the music coming from the stereo. He looks through the window at small houses and stores laid out beside the broken grey road, the townsfolk taking advantage of the beaming sun sitting outside and enjoying the day. He steps on the brake coming to a red light as Todd scans the pages of his book. From out of nowhere a large bird grazes the windscreen and snatches the wipers. The pair jump in their seats and look around*

"The FUCK!"

T: "Cool! That was a Kea."

"Kea!?"

T: "They're known to pull off windscreen wipers and eat the rubber."

"I'm going to have to pay like 100 kiwi dollars to the rental place now. Fucking Keas!"

*Todd pulls out his phone and leans out the window to try and get a picture of the majestic creature. Gator double takes and pulls Todd back in and gives him a death stare*

T: "Okay. Maybe I won't take any picture of our vacation."

"THIS ... This isn't a vacation."

*The light turns green and Gator steps on the gas, continuing down the long stretch of road*

"This is preparation for War... Games."

T: "It feels like a vacation."

"Well, it's not. Just enjoy this beautiful country and the many creatures that ruin it."

T: "Come on, there's great wildlife in New Zealand."

*As Todd says that a large insect crawls onto the hood of the car. A very large insect*

"THE FUCK!!"

T: "Gross. That's a Giant Weta."

"That's a giant what the fuck! Look at that thing! It's almost as big as Frodo!"

T: "You scared of bugs?"

"What? No, I'm just a bit taken back that this fucking Starship Troopers abomination is currently taking residence on my car bonnet."

*The Giant Weta [Picture] starts to crawl onto the windshield and stops halfway up in the center of the glass*

T: "... Get rid of it."

*Gator hits the wiper button, but nothing*

"Oh, yeah. That fucking bird stole the wipers."

T: "Well, use the wiper fluid thing."

"The wiper fluid thing? You mean spray it with water?"

T: "Yeah."

"Hell no. I've seen Gremlins, if water hits that thing like twenty more will pop out."

T: "Well, just drive faster then."

"You're being so sassy today. If I drive faster than it will just press against the glass. I'm not paying for the damage cost after a goddamn kaiju breaks through it. Just ignore it."

*The two sit in silence for a little while, moving down the road exchanging glances with the colossal insect. They roll up the windows*

"Fucking New Zealand. This place is so backwards, then again, what else do you expect from a country were the air force's logo is a flightless bird and at one point in time had a fucking national wizard."

T: "National wizard?"

"I shit you not, the prime minister in nineteen ninety appointed a national wizard. Probably to keep orcs away and shit. You know, even though I'm here I'm starting to wonder whether New Zealand is actually a real place."

*The pair focus on the Giant Weta as it begins to move up the glass once more. Todd looks back at his book as Gator exchanges looks with the insect and the baron road*

T: "... There's a giant carnivorous snail that lives in the southern part of the island..."

"... We're getting the fuck out of this prehistoric country as soon as possible."

T: "Agreed."

"... I missed this."

T: "Missed what?"

"Just having a laugh. It's been too serious lately, I'm just happy to relax for a moment. Despite the attack of the monsters, it's been a chilled out day. Sun's shining, people smiling. It's been, nice."

T: "Yeah. It has."

*The pair drive in silence. The Giant Weta moves closer to Gator's side of the car. He stares at the insect as he tightly grips the steering wheel and speeds forward, hoping the speed will force the insect off the car. The men get forced back into their seats as Gator speed down the road, but the bug hangs on. Gator frustrated pushes all his weight onto the pedal until a chundering comes from the engine and the car dramatically reduces in speed. Black smoke raises from under the hood of the car and the wheels crawl to a stop. Gator lifts his hands off the wheel and looks in disbelief*

"Fuck. Well Todd, it looks like this is the end."

T: "Don't be so dramatic."

"I'm sorry when I eat you."

T: "I'm gonna go back to the town and ask for help."

*Todd reaches for the handle and opens the door slightly, the noise spooks the Giant Weta and it scurries away under the car; Todd slams the door shut*

T: "Nope!"

"Pussy."

T: "I don't see you doing anything."

"Fine! I'll get help you lazy asshole."

*Gator throws the door open and steps out*

T: "Close the door, close the door!!!"

*Gator groans and slams the door shut*

"Have fun in your fucking Saw situation."

*Gator lights up a cigarette and walks down the road as Todd curls into a ball, shifting his eyes, looking for the creepy crawly. The footage slowly fades to black in Gator walking and smoking*

[Image: 4H375RW.png?6]
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