Loverboy cannot see anyone, or anything

Loverboy sees only light

Strobing white light

Pulsing colored light



Loverboy: Why am I here? What’s going on? Who are you, dude? Is this some sort of bullshit trick from the Doc? Did you put something in my drink, man?

Ferja cgyra fanum

Loverboy: What? What the fuck language are you speaking? What the hell is going on, dude, this isn’t funny! You hear me Doctor? This isn’t fucking funny! You can’t just drug people when they’re about to drive! How did you even get to me when I was in Russia anyway, man?

Quo ulo meg ieal jesgel

Quo ulo cho emoc hlen ieal vyvroc

Quo ulo cho emoc iea sura tejc

Loverboy: What? Gods? Why can I understand you? I don’t know the words you’re saying, why do I know what they mean? This is really fucking weird, man, I’ve got to get back to the hotel, back to Sasha Grey’s sweet pussy, back to my awesome Trios belts, and back to America… you aren’t going to get me to forfeit my match, Doctor D’Ville…

Quo urlouji gerja iea fanum

Quo ulo meg ieal jesgel

Loverboy: Well who the hell are you then? Where am I? What are you doing to me? This is fucking stupid, this isn’t real life. You can’t just take people and float them out of their cars in a big beam of light, dude, not even in Russia, okay? What kind of magic trick is this shit, huh? Put me back and I won’t get pissed and turn you in to the XWF officials, man. We can go get a beer, or a vodka, or whatever the hell they have to drink in the middle of nowhere, Russia. If you keep this shit up though, dude, this is kidnapping. I’m an American citizen, and I have rights, even on the other side of the world! I’ll call the cops! I’ll call the FBI, the CIA, the IRS, the NAACP, I don’t give a damn, I’ll call everybody!

Loverboy’s mouth keeps running a mile a minute, but the sound no longer escapes his mouth. His voice has been removed from him. It takes him a few seconds to realize that no matter how hard he yells, there is no noise coming from his throat, but then he sees the silhouettes of his abductors in the pulsing lights.




Loverboy screams silently. The dark haze around him seems to permeate into his gaping mouth, plunging into him as if he were drinking the night sky. It is only then that his wild eyes discover the fact that he is completely naked, other than a sheen of moisture covering his entire body.

Iea jeh meg fubo geh useag fanum quo sum foul iea dacg chymp sroulri ieal nymja yc um omjroais csloun ieal beyso yc ammosoaisuli dacg chymp cgek ioraot umja chymp

You mean… like this?

ioc teeja

I can hear you in my head. It’s not like a real sound, though, it’s more like a memory. How?

Who are you? Why have you taken me? Why am I naked? What are you going to do?

jeh meg vo uhluyja chyc quyra meg gupo remt

Jesus… you’re going to take my sperm aren’t you? You’re going to make some sort of fucked up alien hybrid with me because I’m such a perfect specimen, right? This is rape, man! You better not probe me either, I’ve seen a lot of shit on TV and I know what you intergalactic space rapists are all about, man!

Loverboy is thrown against a surface unseen, his arms and legs spread akimbo. A force like horizontal gravity holds him still, barely allowing his lungs to fill with air or his eyes to blink. The pulsing colors around him turn his eyes into panes of stained glass.

Cyromso

Chug yc omeatf

Iea ulo u heeryus buym voot ieal foulg yc hara eh quoupmoais umja klyjo quoyseh iea jeh meg jocolbo

Iea fubo keycem ym ieal boymc

Quo ulo meg yumgolocgoja yum ieal ckoln

Quo ulo nupot iea voggol

Quo ulo nupot iea cglemtol

Please don’t hurt me… please… I don’t know what I did wrong… I just want to go home…

Quo fubo voom quugseot ieal quelrja hel cheacumjc eh ieal ioulc iea ulo eal seyrjlom

Quo ulo tyubot iea u tyhg

Quo quyra nupo yg kroucot geh iea

Pleasing to me? I… I… don’t understand… I haven’t earned anything… I haven’t done anything… I just want to go home…

Loverboy’s body is spun around in midair, facing a glowing form in the distance which seems to sense him and begin moving forward. A speck at first. A tiny dot impossibly far away.

Reep ug quoug quo fubo hel iea kag iealcorh ymgeh yg umja yg quyra hyra iea quych cho cglomtch eh u secnys tejfouja

The glowing image has grown much closer, looking like something swimming up from the depths of a black, endless ocean. It opens and closes itself to Loverboy, moving quickly and hungrily nearer to him.




I see… something… a ball? A sphere of some kind? Moving toward me. I’m afraid. I don’t know what I am supposed to do… please don’t let it eat me… I don’t want to die…

Reep utuym Rebolvei umja coo yg uc iea quumg geh coo yg

In an instant, the form has changed. It has become exactly what Loverboy’s celestial imprisoners have told him – something pleasing, something exactly like he wants. As Loverboy watches, he floats toward the beautiful woman. His face free to smile, and his member free to swell and stiffen.

Oh… well, this is something I recognize… this is something I can understand. So… you want me to fuck her?

Jeh quoug senoc mugalur geh iea Rebolvei umja iea quyra vo loquuljoja

Jeh quoug iea quumg geh jeh

And so Loverboy does exactly what he knows how to do.






((“Loverboy” Vinnie Lane is standing in the middle of an open road, somewhere in Russia, looking at the sky. He doesn’t know where he is, or how he got there. He doesn’t feel the icy rain on his skin. A car startles him into action as it blares its horn behind him, snapping him out of the daze he was in and sending him diving to the shoulder of the road in order to avoid the vehicle hurtling up to him.))

Вы глупые мать ублюдок выйти из дороги!

((Lying in the wet brush and mud, Loverboy slowly takes an inventory of himself. He feels his arms, legs and chest, touches his sodden, flaxen hair as it is further pasted to the skin of his forehead.))

Loverboy: What the fuck?

((Behind him, the headlights of his rental car glow to life slowly. Loverboy gathers himself from the ground and takes a step forward, toward the car, and the light from the lamps intensifies. Another step and the headlights are at their maximum output. The radio inside suddenly starts playing, but only loud static as if it is under severe interference. Loverboy carefully walks to the driver’s side door and slides behind the wheel, reaching for the dangling keys in the ignition. There is a spark.))

Loverboy: OW! Jesus!

((And the engine roars to life without Loverboy ever turning the key. In the rearview mirror, we see a look of trepidation morph subtly into a grin of understanding, as the eyes of the rock n’ roll megastar gleam with the light of far off stars.))

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