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~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-03-2013, 11:08 AM**

I've been told I need to "earn" my XWF contract back after being tossed into the bay like a worthless piece of shit. I'm also told I need to have an official XWF contract again before I can cash my briefcase in on that frail lump of gelatin known as Mark Flynn.

Let's get it done with -- Who wants to be my stepping stone back into the XWF? Who wants me to press their convulsing body high into the heavens before I snap them down across my left knee and break their spine like a pencil?

I don't give a fuck who it is; first person to answer gets it. Come out big shot Flynn or barely breathing Madison. Come out rookie Crimson Dong, Cobra, and Deadly. Come out, come out, any of you slimy worms and let me squish your brains under my steel toe boot.

**03-03-2013, 12:20 PM**

Get on your knees and beg for it. You know you want to.

**03-03-2013, 12:34 PM**

Better yet, why don't you cash that briefcase in on me because you know I'm worth more to you than every belt in this place combined.

I'm at the top of your list and I don't plan on leaving it any time soon.

~~BigBadLeroy~~ · **03-03-2013, 01:35 PM**

The Earth shakes and Big Bad Leroy approaches Madison and Mister Mystery, while Jade and Vixen, his Iron Valkyries, sit upon either of his shoulders.

Leroy: Howsabout you get outta the way, John Madison and let this fool that's been eying my Iron Valkyries fight for the real title. Cowards been looking at my girls like a jackal trying to feast on the lion's leftovers and is too afraid to come up like a man and take what is his.

Actually, that analogy sucks cause there ain't nothing to compare me to, especially not a lazy-ass lion that has his women do all the work for him 99% of the time. You can't analogize me because the fact is I'm the pinnacle. I'm gonna smash you though, real good. Cause I can and cause I like it.

Valkyries, don't sit around here with these spineless swines, go get me some protein...somethin' raw.

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · (03-03-2013)

I don't know which one of you is more mentally deprived of reality but to think you should be answering my call shows me that you're both worth at least a small amount of my attention.

Incapable John Madison -- I've already almost killed you in the process of getting what I really wanted; the 24/7 briefcase that Sid Feder never cashed in. When it occurred to me that soft-in-the-head fuckbags like yourself might actually believe I was Sid, I knew I'd have no problem claiming that briefcase and manipulating it from Shane

was almost as easy as leaving you a bloody mess before I threw you away like one of my used, bloody condoms. I'll beg alright; if it means getting your water logged ass in a ring with me I'll drop to my knees and close my eyes so you can take the first shot. You and I both fucking know you'd need it -- but what's so sad about that? -- you'd still come out on the losing end and I'd spill even more of your blood before stuffing your barely breathing body down into the sewer systems from which you birthed.

Big Dumbfuck Leroy -- I'd take both of your whores and shove that weight you're lifting right up each of their assholes at the same time and make you watch me dine on Shit-Kabob all night long; and do you know what you'd do about it? Not a god-damned mother fucking thing or I'd snap your ass like a tornado snapping a redwood tree into pieces. You'll do nothing but sit there in the corner, watch me do my dirty work, and hand me the K-Y Jelly whenever I finally decide to fist-blast one of your dried up wenches for my own added amusement. I honestly don't know who is more hideous -- you or those nasty ass man-like beasts you travel around with. Let me guess; they're both so muscular that they're able to squeeze their ass cheeks together tight enough that your tiny dick actually feels something around it when you fuck them in the ass?

It makes no difference to me whether I'm snapping Madison over my knee or whether I'm hoisting Leroy over my head and casting him out into the fifth row -- I'm getting my contract back next Saturday and there's not a damn person on this planet ((or in space)) who stands a chance in stopping this living train wreck from demolishing his way right to the very top.

Oh and Madison? I'll gladly cash in my briefcase on you as soon as you finally win a scrap of gold in this federation. Just let me know whether I need to wait years, years, or years in order for that to finally take place and I'll mark it down on my-

-no I won't. You'll never win jack shit at the end of a rusted screwdriver let alone a legit piece of gold.

So which one of you fucks will it be on Saturday? Or do I need to wait for some other jackoff to stroll on in thinking they're big shit and finally say the words: I accept!

~~BigBadLeroy~~ · **03-03-2013, 02:40 PM**

Listen, coward, the question ain't whether I accept your challenge because you are no challenge. The question is whether or not you accept the task of finding out just how weak and helpless you really are. You can either slink away like a spineless, under-200 pound pencil-neck snake and spend the rest of y'pitiful life filling yerself up wit' lies that your on my level but the fact of the matter is that there's a reason I didn't tell the Valkyries to fetch enough protein for the both of us. I'm a dude that would do Hercules' labors in his sleep...I'd lift Thor's hammer an' crush in my teeth, y'dig? Anything you got I could take anytime I want and ain't nothin' stoppin' me but my own choices. You ain't got the physical strength t'stop me an' you ain't got the mental strength to deal wit' life after you see how crappy it is that there's someone like me around that can destroy all yer little dreams anytime I want.

I'm gonna beat you down an' then the real test is gonna come, you feel me? Yer gonna figure out once an' for all if you can deal with existin' as a worm. But maybe my girls can scare up some nice drugs fer you so you can imagine yer kicking my ass while yer holed in the hospital.

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-03-2013, 02:54 PM**

Well you've certainly got me beat in one game -- the "who can talk more unclear and fail to make two fucks of a point" game; because I still have no Earthly idea if you just accepted my challenge or if you're just talking more shit to-

-oh wait; I'm no challenge. Is that one of the things you said between slurring and butchering your own words? I'll stop myself right here and agree on that subject because to imply that I'm only a challenge for you would suggest you may stand a shadow of a chance at actually overcoming said "challenge." You might as well consider me the immovable object and the unstoppable force in one because if you're the one I step in the ring with on Saturday I will simply be CONCLUSION on its most scathing level imaginable.

Thank you for correcting me when I momentarily thought that I could present you with a challenge rather than a death warrant. I'll take that as -- "No, Mister Mystery 17 31707 1, I am too damn scared to risk taking a loss in my first match to accept a predetermined defeat by your almighty, unmatched, invincible hand of judgement."

Go back to playing with that racist piece of shit Nazi you have been flirting with since you got here. You're a waste of my time if you won't voluntarily be my stepping stone to where I'm going. I'm not here to smell the roses; I'm here to get shit done you self-mutilated, masochistic freak. Now go fuck yourself while your two trash bag whores fantasize about what it would be like to be my human Shit-Kabob!

~~BigBadLeroy~~ · **03-03-2013, 03:10 PM**

I got you beat in every game, punk.

And you know just what I'm talking about. But you can't deal, can you? You look at me an' you realize how insignicant you really are. You're a worm, you're nothin'. And I can crush you any time I wanna.

You got a little bit of courage in you though, t' stand here tryin' dance around me, tryin' t'back down from me wit' out losin' face completely. You got a little bit of pride. Good for you.

It don't matter though. I'm gonna take you an' I'm gonna ruin your entire career, your entire life, just 'cause I can. Then I'm gonna walk away an' maybe I'll forget about it, like normal guys like you forget the little bugs they squash. Watcha gonna do after the match, when you realize that life ain't fair, that there ain't know way you can ever right the wrong I did to you...and that if I want, I can come back and do it again and again and again?

You gonna wish I killed you, punk. Actually, I just might, but right now, I'm thinkin' I won't.

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-03-2013, 04:50 PM**

Oh alright so you do accept. I still have no fucking clue to be honest but I'm going to just say you accept this loss by my hand.

Book it,

, or I'll snap your neck like a twig just as fast as I'll shove a pair of hedge clippers down Leroy's throat and start opening and closing them while the blade is down inside his fat neck.

Donathan · **03-03-2013, 06:02 PM**

It's a shame we never got to know each other, Leroy. As fate would have it, the hand you've been dealt is an unjust one▬timely eradication. May you live in interesting times and may you find what you are looking for, even if it devours you whole.

With a tip of my hat▬good night to you, sir.

**03-03-2013, 06:21 PM**

Quote:Incapable John Madison -- I've already almost killed you in the process of getting what I really wanted; the 24/7 briefcase that Sid Feder never cashed in. When it occurred to me that soft-in-the-head fuckbags like yourself might actually believe I was Sid, I knew I'd have no problem claiming that briefcase and manipulating it from Shane was almost as easy as leaving you a bloody mess before I threw you away like one of my used, bloody condoms. I'll beg alright; if it means getting your water logged ass in a ring with me I'll drop to my knees and close my eyes so you can take the first shot. You and I both fucking know you'd need it -- but what's so sad about that? -- you'd still come out on the losing end and I'd spill even more of your blood before stuffing your barely breathing body down into the sewer systems from which you birthed.

Almost killed someone? I killed a man's wife right in front of him while he was strapped down on a guillotine. You're all show and no-go, Mystery. You're Sid Feder with a mask.

Quote:Oh and Madison? I'll gladly cash in my briefcase on you as soon as you finally win a scrap of gold in this federation. Just let me know whether I need to wait years, years, or years in order for that to finally take place and I'll mark it down on my-

I don't need gold. I'm at the top of your list and everyone else's list without it.

People will line up to fight Johnny in his "sewer," before they line up to fight Sheckler for gold in a sold out stadium.

I am the "scrap of gold" that you and everyone else is after.

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-03-2013, 06:34 PM**

(03-03-2013, 06:21 PM)John Madison Said: You're all show and no-go, Mystery. You're Sid Feder with a mask.

So says the used, bloody condom as it swirls down the toilet hole simply because I chose to throw it away instead of rip through it?

So says the man who stepped aside and let a rookie take over this conversation, only to return from the shadows once I demanded that he be the one to fall before me Saturday night?

Yeah; thought so -- the incapable, self contradictory lemming who worships a man he once sought out to destroy. You'd be better off talking your trash to your broken watch; at least it can't clamp you in a vice and extort precious valuables out of your lord and master and at least it doesn't know your time has long since passed.

You're not even a capable foe worth slaughtering -- you're hardly even alive -- as far as I'm concerned you're Flo Feder without the hefty set of balls.

**03-03-2013, 07:15 PM**

Quote:So says the used, bloody condom as it swirls down the toilet hole simply because I chose to throw it away instead of rip through it?

Sure. If it had been me, I would have ripped right through that bloody condom. But I suppose that you aren't equipped well enough to pull off such a move. Of course you're not, Feder #2. Just like Feder, you've got the gun but you're too big of a pussy to use it.

Quote:So says the man who stepped aside and let a rookie take over this conversation, only to return from the shadows once I demanded that he be the one to fall before me Saturday night?

Did he? I didn't even notice. Good for him. If Benjamin Crane can beat Feder #1, then this roided up monkey should be able to take version 2. I wouldn't have accepted your challenge anyway. Like I said earlier, I want you to cash in that briefcase and beg me. Try to listen more. Idiot.

Quote:Yeah; thought so -- the incapable, self contradictory lemming who worships a man he once sought out to destroy. You'd be better off talking your trash to your broken watch; at least it can't clamp you in a vice and extort precious valuables out of your lord and master and at least it doesn't know your time has long since passed.

I did destroy Shane

. I destroyed him and the era that kept this ship anchored. WGW(F) is gone. Slater is gone. Page is gone. Tax is gone. Scorpio is gone. Randall is gone. All of the XWF legends are gone. And the old potato-loving Shane

you all once loved is gone. I'm the reason your buddy Don is able to cause explosions and fly jets in on Saturday nights. I took Saturdays and turned them into Johnnydays. When will you and the rest of these morons realize that? This whole Shove It thing is just a joke, and I'm sitting here pissing myself while you guys go out of your way to kill each other over the North Korean Title.

Quote:You're not even a capable foe worth slaughtering -- you're hardly even alive -- as far as I'm concerned you're Flo Feder without the hefty set of balls.

Haha, "so says..."

So says the guy who's dropping my name on his hit list.

Ah, you sound so bitter about what I did to Flo. There's the Sid I know and love.

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-04-2013, 04:23 PM**

Did you just play back each part of the entire comment I made prior even though this feed keeps our related material linked together for the viewers?

If replaying my words and trying to collude their meaning is what you do with something you disagree with then it seems to me like you're trying hard to validate other things I've said in the past; things that you neglected to "replay" and so miserably attempt to shoot down -- for instance my comment about how I'd crush you even with you getting in a free first shot -- yet Big Bad Leroy is the monkey in your mind?

Keep failing to step up to the plate; keep failing to acquire true stature; keep trying to discredit all the things I can do with my eyes closed that you know God damn fucking well you couldn't even accomplish if you managed to get your cranium unwedged from your ass. You tell me to try and listen more? The sad thing here is you've been trying to listen and still can't come back with shit to discredit what I've already done in the short time I've been here. I told you -- tell me how many years I need to wait for you to earn something worth me cashing in on and I'll do it. Have you ever even been considered for a title shot, let alone received one? Keep talking like that's how you "like it" though; we're all buying it just like we all bought your little speech on Saturday.

I'm already more well known after a week of effort than you are after -- how long? -- that's right none of us know. Do you even know how long you've been wasting away here? Check that watch; that beautiful, water logged watch that no longer functions -- the one aspect about your persona that so rightfully signifies all you truly embody. Now sit back and watch this week as I destroy the so-called "monkey" you pretended not to notice in this conversation and your so-called friend in the N.A.Z.I. you are trying to hard to emulate just so he'll carry your saturated weight.

Nice job trying to float away to safety here. Oh, and nice try last week too. Both attempts are laughable at best but neither can even get a chuckle out of me so you failed in that regard too.

Sebastian Duke · **03-04-2013, 05:43 PM**

I'd check your rearview mirror...

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-04-2013, 06:02 PM**

Yeah I know you're way back there just like you were the entire week we were building up for our match you got crushed in. Your point? You need me to reverse real quick and put you out of your misery for good?

Sebastian Duke · **03-04-2013, 06:15 PM**

I'm not so sure I was referring to you. You see, Mister Mystery, Sid Feder, whoever the hell really is behind that mask... I have no problem with you... Not yet... The Black Circle and I have a little history...

I haven't forgotten...

THEY... I do have a problem with...

Sooner or later, they'll get theirs too...

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-04-2013, 06:23 PM**

Well then get to it already -- get the fuck out of everybody's rear view and get in the monster truck that's crushing their short bus! Take them out of the equation and then try your hand with Gilmour and myself again. See if Madison will accept a match with you since he'll sure as fuck never step through the ropes when I'm in the ring ready to compete. Start with him -- the bottom of the Circle -- and work your way up to slitting

's throat so my manager Donathan can take control of the entire federation. Help accelerate the inevitable.

~~C Y R E N~~ · **03-04-2013, 08:15 PM**

I will mix my own piss with mountain dew and once chilled, splash it across this d-bag's face.

**03-04-2013, 09:10 PM**

(03-04-2013, 04:23 PM)Mister Mystery 17 31707 1 Said: Did you just play back each part of the entire comment I made prior even though this feed keeps our related material linked together for the viewers?

Yeah. I did.

Quote:If replaying my words and trying to collude their meaning is what you do with something you disagree with then it seems to me like you're trying hard to validate other things I've said in the past; things that you neglected to "replay" and so miserably attempt to shoot down -- for instance my comment about how I'd crush you even with you getting in a free first shot -- yet Big Bad Leroy is the monkey in your mind?

I've already pointed out how empty your threats are in the promo I did at sea. Incapable Feder. You can't pull the trigger on Johnny, and you certainly cannot crush him. You had your chance, and you chose to let me go for a swim. You picked a briefcase which is as meaningless as your threats. Mystery Feder is just waving his empty gun around like last time. You're harmless.

Quote:Keep failing to step up to the plate; keep failing to acquire true stature; keep trying to discredit all the things I can do with my eyes closed that you know God damn fucking well you couldn't even accomplish if you managed to get your cranium unwedged from your ass. You tell me to try and listen more? The sad thing here is you've been trying to listen and still can't come back with shit to discredit what I've already done in the short time I've been here. I told you -- tell me how many years I need to wait for you to earn something worth me cashing in on and I'll do it. Have you ever even been considered for a title shot, let alone received one? Keep talking like that's how you "like it" though; we're all buying it just like we all bought your little speech on Saturday.

Titles are beneath me.

Do you people not listen?

I've said since the day I stepped in that I want nothing to do with your meaningless awards. I am the title. I'm worth more than every title in this federation put together. I've got you and Unknown Soldier putting me at the top of your lists over Mark Flynn and Lexi Sheckler. I've got turds like you going out of your way to shove me off the Bay and bargaining with

over some briefcase I took a dump in. I've got you and Donathan forming groups just to take down little old me. Go ahead though. I love it.

You think winning a title will earn you respect? Nope. Look at the show you're on,

.

Quote:I'm already more well known after a week of effort than you are after -- how long? -- that's right none of us know. Do you even know how long you've been wasting away here? Check that watch; that beautiful, water logged watch that no longer functions -- the one aspect about your persona that so rightfully signifies all you truly embody. Now sit back and watch this week as I destroy the so-called "monkey" you pretended not to notice in this conversation and your so-called friend in the N.A.Z.I. you are trying to hard to emulate just so he'll carry your saturated weight.

[/color]
So says the bitter guy who went out of his way to put Johnny at the top of his list. So says the guy who went out of his way to attack Johnny in Singapore. Oh wait, are you going to try to convince me it was all for the briefcase? Sure, Mystery. You stick to that story. Eventually we might believe it. Those little briefcases mean nothing. Jim Hickbilly and Cyren are getting title shots this week after doing a whole lot of nothing for the past two months.

Of course, it doesn't surprise me that Sid Feder Jr. would settle for Shane's handout over actually crushing someone. You can't crush me, Mysery. You might have come back with a bang, but you're still firing blanks. Nice mask though, it's neato.

Quote:See if Madison will accept a match with you since he'll sure as fuck never step through the ropes when I'm in the ring ready to compete.

I'll step through the ropes as soon as you cash in that little briefcase on me that you hold onto so tightly. Must be to fill the void that Flo left behind.

~~Mister Mystery 17 31707 1~~ · **03-08-2013, 06:22 PM**

Oh shit I forgot you were here. You ready to watch your boy get his ass curb stomped like a little negro kid tomorrow night? And yes; I'm talking about Nathaniel. You can sit back the whole time thinking about how smart you are for not making the mistake of signing a contract to face me.

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode Let's get this over with. Open challenge to anyone in this shit filled federation!
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