Shove It Saturday Night
Saturday, Feb 23rd
Live from The Float at Marina Bay, Singapore
***anyone who gets tossed into the bay for ANY reason INSTANTLY loses their match and is FIRED from the X-treme Wrestling Federation, to be left behind in Singapore without being paid for their performance this evening***
Nightmare
- vs -
El Guernico
- vs -
Ym
- vs -
John Madison
Super Shithead Elimination Match
RULES: One dozen toilets will be brought out onto the float that are ALL clogged with shit. A participant is eliminated when their head is stuffed into one of the shit filled toilets, thus confirming their "shithead" status!
Gabriel Harding
- vs -
Tommy Carlos King
Standard Match
The Crimson Dong
& John Black
a.k.a. "Team Black Dong"
- vs -
Ronnie "The Deportation Man" Wilkins
"Don't Cross My Border" Match
Ronnie Wilkins will be armed with a collapsible baton and starts the match OUTSIDE of the ring while John Black & Crimson Dong both start the match INSIDE the ring. Match has a 5 minute time limit. If Black or Dong can get over the top rope and exit the ring, Team Black Dong wins. If Wilkins can keep Black & Dong from exiting the ring over the top rope for 5 minutes, Wilkins wins.
Agony
- vs -
'Electrified' Craig Davis
GUEST REF: Mr. XWF
X-treme Rules Match
Tyler Vegas
- vs -
Luca Arzegotti
Standard Match
Danny Devia
- vs -
Stagger Jones
- vs -
Neil Capra
- vs -
Unknown Soldier
X-treme Bloodbath Elimination Battle Royal
RULES: Opponent must be bleeding from TWO body parts and THEN thrown over the top rope to the floor
MAIN EVENT - Part 1
North Korean Championship
Lexi Sheckler
& Griffin MacAlister
- vs -
Cyren
& Sarah Saint James
"Unwilling Partners" X-tremely Greedy Tag Match, 1 Fall
The fall can be via Pinfall or Submission
The person who scores the winning fall WILL BE the North Korean Champion!
MAIN EVENT - Part 2
XWF Tag Team Championship
Peter Gilmour
& ???
- vs -
Sebastian Duke
& ???
X-treme Rules Mystery Partners Tag Match
|
Fireworks shoot off into the sky as we are at one of the most unique locations an XWF event has ever been held! We've seen past events held on an actual boat but tonight we come to The Float at Marina Bay!
Anyone who lands in the bay will out of a job and will be finding their own way home, wherever that may be!
Let's get right to the action with the first match of the evening... something that is sure to set the pace for a night of pure insanity and brutality!
Nightmare
- vs -
El Guernico
- vs -
Ym
- vs -
John Madison
Super Shithead Elimination Match
RULES: One dozen toilets will be brought out onto the float that are ALL clogged with shit. A participant is eliminated when their head is stuffed into one of the shit filled toilets, thus confirming their "shithead" status!
The reaction of the crowd is priceless tonight as one by one dozens of shit filled toilets are wheeled in. The question in everyone's mind is, who supplied all the feces? John Madison stares at YM, El Guernico and Nightmare with intent and purpose in his eyes. That intent fueled by the determination to submerge all of their heads into those toilets until they are covered and dripping in fecal matter. If that wasn't enough John Madison looks over and acknowledges the guillotine that was rolled into place with a simple nod. This means someone may receive a worse fate than having their head submerged in crap! The bell is rung and this match is soon underway.
John Madison instantly springs into action diving toward YM and smashes his head deep into one of the toilets right off the bat. John Madison then begins stomping on the back of YM's head pushing YM's head further down into the shit with each stomp. Shit overflows up all around YM's head and spills out of the toilet. What a fucking sick display!
Suddenly El Guernico comes flying towards John Madison with a Springboard Moonsault. John Madison simply moves away and El Guernico smashes into YM who is still head deep in the toilet. El Guernico gets up with a mess of feces smeared onto him and looks as though he may hurl as he turns around to receive a Missile Drop Kick from John Madison. El Guernico goes down and lands in the shit that spewed forth from the toilet. It's disgusting but he's still in the match! John Madison moves in to finish El Guernico off and is caught with a spear by Nightmare.
Nightmare begins kicking and stomping on John Madison while John Madison is down. John Madison doesn't seem fazed as he starts to laugh and grabs Nightmare by the leg, tossing him down. Climbing to his feet Madison still continues to laugh as he lifts Nightmare to his feet and pulls him over to another toilet. From there Madison hits Nightmare with a Piledriver that cause Nightmares head to smash right into the crap filled commode. Nightmares screams in horror and disgust as his head slips into the feces.
Now there was just one man left. One man besides John Madison who didn't get his head smashed deep into the treacherous confines of a shit filled toilet. El Guernico still lay in a pile of crap that over flowed from the toilet that YM's head was stuck into repeatedly. John Madison looks upon El Guernico with disgust and walks over to a toilet. John Madison then rips the toilet from the ground and begins to climb the ropes while holding onto the toilet. John Madison reaches the top turnbuckle and looks out into the ring. Just then El Guernico begins to stir. El Guernico's eyes pop open. El Guernico begins to slowly and groggily rise to his feet.
SMASH!
John Madison dives with the toilet and smashes it down onto El Guernico's head. Somehow John Madison did this in such a way the toilet actually went over El Guernico's head. With all three opponents getting their heads stuffed into crap filled toilets the winner is proclaimed.
Winner: John Madison
El Guernico falls back and the toilet remains stuck onto El Guernico's head. El Guernico begins to frantically hit at the toilet and attempts to climb to his feet. It appears the toilet landed on El Guernico's so forcefully it somehow got stuck. The toilet was lodged onto El Guernico's head! El Guernico staggers about the ring and finally stumbles and falls. He falls in a spot that couldn't have been better to fall even if it was planned. Right next to the guillotine. John Madison saunters over to the guillotine and yanks El Guernico into position. The guillotine also happens to be the bear guillotine so El Guernico's head fits perfectly in place even with the toilet still on it. Then there's just one quick pull of the rope and El Guernico's head and the toilet land in the bay.
Madison then reaches down next to the guillotine and lifts up two collars that he then walks over to YM and Nightmare slapping each collar onto their necks. John Madison looks from YM to Nightmare as a sick and sadistic grin spreads across his face.
John Madison: El Guernico got his head cut off. When I'm done with you two, you'll wish it had been you instead!
Why has Madison put collars on YM and Nightmare???
CRACK!!!
Somebody just came out of nowhere and cracked NIGHTMARE in the head with a steel chair!!!
IT'S JOHN BLACK!!!
John Black: I am Sorry for this...but you gotta to go man...Nice knowing you.
Madison takes a chair of his own and sets it up so he can take a seat and just enjoy this interesting turn of events. He watches intently as John Black then grabs Nightmare's body up...
John Black tosses Nightmare into the Bay!!!
John Black: May God help you get back to the States..My Friend.
Madison begins clapping as he leans back in his chair, dangerously close to the edge of the bay but just not giving a fuck. John Black looks at YM who still has a collar on his neck and Black looks confused.
John Black: What's with the collar? You going to walk him and train him like a dog or something?
John Madison gets up from his chair and seems to be trying to decide whether he should answer Black or just toss him into the bay... or stuff a tampon in his mouth.
John Black's eyes suddenly get wide with shock! He points behind Madison!
John Black: Look out! Behind you!!!
CRACK! The very same steel chair Madison had been sitting in is literally wrapped around his own neck like a collar after being smashed down onto his head with such force that the middle of the chair blew out!
John Black runs from the scene as fast as he can as Madison is out on his feet. He slowly topples forward and lands face first with a thud, fully revealing the monstrous man standing behind him...
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1!
He steps forward and places his boot on the lower back of Madison and grabs the legs of the chair which still has its frame wrapped around John's throat. He begins pulling the chair upward with all his might while putting all his weight on the foot in John's back. He's got him locked in some kind of sick, torturous Boston crab! Blood gushes from Madison's head as his face begins to turn purple; the frame of that busted up chair pulling up into his throat so hard that it's cutting off all oxygen flow. Mister Mystery begins to yank harder and harder on the chair as if he's literally trying to pop Madison's head off with this sick maneuver. He continues this for what seems like several minutes until XWF security rushes onto the scene to stop him. He takes his foot off John's back and places it on the back of his head, smashing his face down into the ground when he let's go of the chair.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: Remember my promise? I've got to do what you've been begging Sid Feder to do all this time. You've been craving this -- I'm here to deliver, free of charge. Sid sends his regards, I'm sure; and so does his dead piece of shit WIFE!
What the- Is Flo Feder really dead? What's this madman talking about?
He reaches down into John's pocket and pulls out a can of mace.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: Predictable as always, Johnny. Thank you very much for the help.
He begins unloading the spray into the faces of all the XWF security members! He grabs one of them by the shirt and flings him out into the bay while the others scatter for their lives, coughing and rubbing their burning eyes as John Madison is left alone with this sick freak.
Mister Mystery points over to something very large that has had a black blanket over it this whole time. He walks over to it and yanks the blanket off, exposing a massive vice grip that's almost as big as he is!
It's built right into the ground and comes up to about chest level. He drags Madison's body toward the grip as a trail of blood is left on the ground from Madison's gushing skull. Mister Mystery takes Madison's head and locks it into the massive vice grip, tightening the handle just enough so his head is held in place.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: I said something earlier in the week about locking John Madison's head into one of these and twisting his body until his head was no longer one with him. Let me show you all how this works.
The fans scream in horror as he grabs the lower half of John's body and holds it horizontally while beginning to twist in one direction! John's head is facing the ground while locked in those grips, but Mister Mystery is attempting to face John's body toward the sky!
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: And who is rushing out to help this scum fuck? Just as I told Peter Gilmour -- NO ONE. Even his own Black Circle is backstage hoping that at any second his body falls limp to the ground and I'm sprayed with a massive blast of his blood from the detachment. I'll bet even that weak, frail little boy known as Unknown Soldier is back there somewhere watching and waiting for his chance to run out and drink all the blood that's about to flow; and I do mean
flow like a river. If anyone at all cares for this piece of shit's life, I suggest you get your mother fucking asses out here right now and try to stop me! Come try! Anyone!
He keeps trying to turn the body of Madison as fans turn away and can't bear to look.
"Stop right there!"
A voice! Somebody cares?
Out from the back comes SHANE
!
: Stop it right now! If you plan to even have a chance of working tonight's main event for the Tag Team Titles then you better release John Madison from that contraption this instant!
Mister Mystery laugh and drops Madison's limp body but his head remains clamped tightly in that massive vice.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: I was hoping it would be you. Tell me, Shane -- Do you believe that I'm Sid Feder? Johnny boy here believes.
: I don't care who you are but if you plan on having any kind of future here in my company you'll learn rule number one... and that's to DO AS I SAY!
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: I had a feeling you'd say something like that, but let's just assume for a moment that I'm the one calling the shots around here.
He picks Madison's body back up and begins to twist once again as Shane yells out.
: Stop! Alright, fine! If it matters so much to you then I'll go along with your little game for now. Sure... you're Sid Feder. Whatever you say.
Mister Mystery drops John's body again and brushes some blood off of his jacket.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: That's fantastic, Shane. Do you know what that means?
Shane doesn't bother answering this nut bag psychopath.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: It means you have something of mine and I want it returned to me. See, if you believe that I'm Sid Feder then
I believe it's time for you to return an item that belongs to me.
: And what might that be?
Mistery Mystery let's the anticipation build but some of the fans already are picking up on what he's doing here...
He raises his voice for all to hear.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1:
My 24/7 briefcase! My guaranteed, instant shot at any championship in the XWF at any time I decide to cash it in. I want that briefcase and I want it guaranteed to me that no matter what you see here tonight, or in the days to come, it can never be taken from me until I choose to cash it in. I don't care if the mouth of hell itself opens up here tonight and threatens to swallow you whole; I don't care if my mask flies off and you see that I'm not even human; I DON'T CARE IF I GO TO JAIL FOR MURDER -- that briefcase remains a possession of mine and nothing can ever change that fact. Now, confirm this and I'll release your errand boy here from the clutches of death and be on my way.
Shane doesn't seem pleased by this... While it's true that Sid Feder did have a 24/7 briefcase when we last saw him, there's no clear cut evidence that this psychopath is actually the rightful owner.
: You think you're smart, don't you? Even with that briefcase in your possession, I still run this company and I still make the rules that you'll need to follow in the future. If that briefcase is what will keep you from murdering my right hand man here tonight, then so be it! You've got your damned briefcase!
The fans let out a considerably mixed reaction as Mister Mystery immediately gets right down to business and loosens the massive vice grip, allowing Madison to fall completely to the ground.
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: I'm glad you made the right choice. It looks like John Madison gets to live after all. There's just one problem; he's incredibly filthy and soaked in blood after the friendly game we were just playing. I'm sure you won't mind if I help clean him off a little.
Before Shane can even react, Mister Mystery easily plucks Madison from the ground and lifts him high over his head in a military press!
: No!
Mister Mystery drives Madison back down and across his knee in one of the most sickening military press backbreakers ever displayed. He doesn't let Madison fall off of his knee though; instead he pulls him right back up and presses him high into the heavens once more!
AND LAUNCHES MADISON CLEAN OFF THE EDGE AND FAR INTO THE BAY!
The fans scream as Madison's body flies out and hits the water with a huge splash!
MISTER MYSTERY 17 31707 1: I've just given John Madison the release he's been needing for quite some time now; and you know what,
? You're NEXT.
Mistery Mystery immediately starts running around the ringside area and up the ramp as Shane drops his mic and quickly makes his escape through the back before Mystery can get his hands on him.
John Madison has been fired from the XWF!!!
Gabriel Harding
- vs -
Tommy Carlos King
Standard Match
“Show Me… How the Gods… Kill.”
After those lyrics were softly sung by Glenn Danzig, the guitar riff violently rips through the sound systems. It only took an instant for Gabriel to push through the black curtains and onto the stage. He nodded his head with the kick drum played in the background, his hair following the direction his head swung. He remained on the stage for the entire ‘heavy’ part of the song to which he came out to, but once it died down a bit, he began his descent down to the ring. He kept his eyes focused on the ring, never once removing them. As he approached, he picked up the pace and slid in underneath the bottom rope. Afterword, while still on the ground, he moved over to the nearest corner and that was where he remained. The song had now died down to a soft vocal melody again from Danzig, and ended with the last beat on the drum.
During this time, Tommy Carlos King has snuck into the ring and...
BAM! Harding saw him coming and got an elbow up just as King was closing in! King reels back and wobbles on his feet, giving up his back to Gabriel Harding...
Big mistake, King! He just opened himself up for PARADISE LOST! (i.e. Omega Driver)
The fans can't believe it! The referee is hurrying to signal for the bell to START this match and King has already just been annihilated by Harding's finishing move!
DING DING DING!
...1
...2
...Harding lifts him up!
Harding: It's not going to be THAT easy! I've got something much better!
Harding violently whips King over the ropes and he crashes to the outside with a sickening thud. Harding quickly follows and kicks King hard in the ribs and sends him toppling past some electrical equipment. Harding continues to land precise, calculated shots that are clearly intended to keep moving King closer and closer... TO THE EDGE!
My god! He's slowly but surely beating King toward the bay! The fans all start to rise in anticipation as the referee is counting both men out of the ring. The referee is up to a FIVE count now as Gabriel Harding has finally gotten King's semi-conscious body right to the edge of the bay!
Harding pulls King up, holding him in place as King can barely stand on his own accord. Harding turns King's body so that he's facing the bay!!!
Harding glares at the fans for a moment as the referee has now reached an EIGHT count!!!
All Harding has to do is gently push King and he'll fall face first into the bay...
BUT INSTEAD!!! PARADISE LOST!!!!
OH MY GOD!!!! KING'S SKULL BOUNCES OFF THE VERY EDGE AND SENDS KING DESCENDING DOWN INTO THE BAY AS A SPLATTER OF BLOOD IS LEFT WHERE HIS HEAD HIT THE HARD EDGE!!!!
The fans are in an uproar! Half of them LOVE it and the other half can't believe what they've just seen at the hands of Gabriel Harding! The referee freezes, realizing that this means Tommy Carlos King is instantly FIRED from the XWF!
Gabriel Harding looks down into the bay as blood trails off from the open wound on Tommy King's head, giving the water around him a nice red tint. The referee holds his ear piece to listen to some sort of instructions he must be getting from the back...
...That's it! He's calling for the bell! Shane
has instructed this referee to call for the bell!
The ref gives the official decision to the announcer.
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen! Not only has Tommy Carlos King lost this match but he has also lost his job! Therefore... your winner... GABRIEL HARDING!
"How The Gods Kill" begins to play once more as Harding brushes his hands off; a job well done and a debut for the record books here tonight.
Winner: Gabriel Harding
Several minutes later, Tommy King has somehow managed to climb back up out of the bay! Blood is pouring from his head but he's managed to stop himself from drowning! What great news...
...Tommy doesn't even have a chance to make his way to the back when Neil Capra ambushes him from behind!
What the hell?!?
The fans are looking around the arena wondering where this bastard came from. Neil throws a punch that strikes King right in the throat! King stumbles around, coughing multiple times, and dropping down to his knees. Capra follows up on this by kicking him repeatedly in the chest until King's chest turns a deep color of red. He smiles to himself as he drags the fallen King over to the edge of arena, near the bay. King springs to life however, and starts throwing a flurry of punches. None of the strikes come even close to connecting with their target. Neil begins to laugh uncontrollably and knees King in the temple. He picks King up, and with one punch he sends the beaten down man right onto the edge. King sways back an forth, dangerously close to falling into the bay as Neil grabs a steel chair from nearby and throws it at Tommy's face!
Tommy catches it... but Neil dropkicks the chair right into Tommy's face and send him FLYING off the edge and landing many feet out into the bay!
This is unheard of!!! Tommy King has somehow managed to get knocked into the bay TWICE!!!
WAIT A MINUTE!!! NEIL ISN'T DONE YET!!!
He just grabbed one of the large, heavy speakers that entrance themes get played through and he lifts the speaker high above his head! OH MY GOD! He's going to launch that speaker out into the bay, right into Tommy King who is trying to swim to safety!
Neil takes aim...
...but the speaker is yanked backward from behind him by someone! He loses his grip of the speaker and turns around to see...
KNIGHTMASK!!!!
KnightMask has come to save the day for Tommy King! He unloads on Neil Capra with a flurry of rights and then boots him in the stomach, following up with a quick DDT that neutralizes him. The fans aren't sure what to make of this. It seems NightMask was sitting in the crowd UNmasked all this time, but when he saw that King's life was literally in danger he threw his mask on and sprung into action! We're got a real life superhero on our hands!
Security comes to break this up before it goes any further and they escort both men to the back separately as some of the fans chant "Let them fight...let them fight..."
Will these two meet in the ring in the future to settle this score?!?
The Crimson Dong
& John Black
a.k.a. "Team Black Dong"
-
vs -
Ronnie "The Deportation Man" Wilkins
"Don't Cross My Border" Match
Ronnie Wilkins will be armed with a collapsible baton and starts the match OUTSIDE of the ring while John Black & Crimson Dong both start the match INSIDE the ring. Match has a 5 minute time limit. If Black or Dong can get over the top rope and exit the ring, Team Black Dong wins. If Wilkins can keep Black & Dong from exiting the ring over the top rope for 5 minutes, Wilkins wins.
The Crimson Dong and John Black are both in the ring awaiting the arrival of Ronnie "The Deportation Man" Wilkins.
Crimson Dong throws himself over the top rope to the outside!
He hits his head pretty hard as John Black looks on, confused...
Dong eventually gets up and raises his hands in the air.
Dong: I did it! Me win! Ring the bell! Dong dong dong!
The fans boo Crimson Dong as he does a cartwheel on the outside and slips in the process, hurting himself a little more. Clearly The Crimson Dong doesn't fully understand that he has to actually wait for the match to begin as John Black invites him back into the ring.
Wait a minute! Here comes Ronnie Wilkins out of the crowd with his baton!
CRACK! He just nailed Crimson Dong in the face with the baton and rolled him into the ring! John Black yells at Wilkins, who in turn points into the ring at Black and lifts his baton to signal that Black will be next!
The ref calls for the bell and this match is underway. If Crimson Dong or John Black can exit OVER the top rope and land on the floor at ringside, they win the match! The clock is set for the 5 minute time limit!
5:00
John Black exchanges some words with Ronnie, who urges Black to try and escape the ring over the rope. Black goes to one corner as Wilkins heads toward the same area so he can strike Black as soon as he starts trying to climb over. Black thinks about it and heads to the opposite corner and Wilkins is very quick to stay on top of things and waits right outside where Black would have to try and drop to. Black looks over at Crimson Dong who is out cold on the canvas. He gets an idea!
4:20
John Black pulls Crimson Dong's body up and drags it over toward the ropes...
He flings Dong's arm over the top rope and starts trying to push Dong over the rope! If he can shove Dong out over the rope, and Dong lands at ringside, THEY WIN!!!
Ronnie Wilkins looks at the fans in disbelief, motioning at Black and mouthing the words "is this guy for real?" as he basically let's Black try what he's doing uninterrupted. Black finally gets Dong over the top rope!
Ronnie is right there to shove the falling Crimson Dong so that he rolls back in under the bottom rope after landing on the edge of the ring canvas instead of out to the floor. Ronnie instantly leaps up after doing that and cracks John Black in the head with the baton as he was still leaning somewhat over the ropes after shoving Dong's body over!
Black stumbles backward and goes down to one knee in the center of the ring as Dong starts to wake up. Ronnie reaches under the bottom rope and pulls Crimson Dong a little closer, hanging his head over the apron now so he can back up and kick Dong right in the head! Ronnie then blasts Dong right in the head with another baton shot and shoves him back in violently! The fans are loving every second of it!
3:50
John Black gets back up and decides to just charge and baseball slide right into Ronnie under the ropes! He catches Ronnie in the face with both of his feet and then continues to the outside of the ring! The match goes on as Black exited under the bottom rope instead of going over the ropes, and Black follows up with a spear. Ronnie's baton goes rolling away and John Black quickly goes after it. He grabs the baton and then hurries back into the ring with it as Ronnie starts to get back to his feet.
3:00
John Black waves the baton in the air and laughs at Ronnie, who instantly sprints toward the ring and slides in under the bottom rope! Black swings the baton but Ronnie dodges the first swing and catches Black's arm on the second swing, quickly delivering an arm breaker and following up with a Sambo suplex! The fans cheer as Ronnie sees Crimson Dong starting to move again and he lifts him to his feet... but Dong drops down and hits a low blow!!! Dong follows up by bouncing off the ropes and coming back at Ronnie with a flying dong thrust but Ronnie catches Dong's entire body and delivers a fallaway slam.
2:00
John Black now takes his turn charging and catches Ronnie with a stiff clothesline. He follows up with several stomps and then grabs the baton to strike, but Ronnie easily escapes under the bottom rope to avoid being nailed with his own weapon. John Black throws the baton down at Ronnie and then just figures "screw it" and Black backs up!!! He runs forward and just dives over the top rope!
CRACK!!! Ronnie leaped up onto the canvas just in time and while holding his baton at each end with both of his hands, used it to catch Black across the throat and send him tumbling back into the ring!!! The fans pop as the referee holds his own throat in pain just from seeing such a nasty looking turn of events!
1:00
We're down to one minute and counting as Black holds his throat and is gagging and choking. Crimson Dong is starting to get back up now and Ronnie runs around ringside to get closer and grabs his ankles, yanking Dong clean outside the ring from under the rope. Ronnie pulls Dong up and quickly hits "Judge, Jury, Removal Officer!" (i.e. Secures opponent in a brainbuster type maneuver but upon lofting him in the air, he sits straight down and drops him on the top of his head)
Dong is out cold! Ronnie hoists him back up and rolls his limp body back into the ring and then enters it himself as well. Ronnie stalks John Black who is starting to get back up now. John has no idea where Ronnie is and just as Black stands back to his feet he's caught with a flying knee off the ropes!
20 SECONDS REMAIN!!!
Ronnie looks at the timer and sees Crimson Dong still out cold in the ring. He turns his attention back to John Black and Irish whips Black into the ropes... THE EXPEDITED REMOVAL! (i.e. Wilkins' whips his opponent into the ropes, as he returns, Wilkins executes a flying armbar and secures the submission move)
He's got that armbar locked in tight! John Black isn't going anywhere!!!
The timer runs down as Dong continues to lay motionless in the ring. John Black tries fighting the pain of the submission but he can't take it! HE'S TAPPING!!!
BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER! This isn't a submission match!
The timer continues running down...
...9
...8
John Black is tapping furiously! He's screaming in agony!
...7
...6
...5
...4
...3
...2
...1
...BUZZZZZZ!!!!!!
The timer goes off and the ref calls for the bell! Ronnie Wilkins has successfully kept both men from exiting the ring over the top rope for a total of FIVE minutes! The fans roar their approval as Ronnie finally releases the submission and stands to his feet, allowing the ref to raise his hand in victory here tonight. What a debut for "The Deportation Man!"
Winner: Ronnie Wilkins
Agony
- vs -
'Electrified' Craig Davis
GUEST REF: Mr. XWF
X-treme Rules Match
Mr. XWF stands awaiting to make important ref calls as Agony and Craig Davis lock up as this match begins. Both Agony and Craig Davis are meeting each other blow for blow. Neither one seems to be getting the upper hand when suddenly.
CRACK!
Craig Davis is hit with a steel baseball bat from Mr. XWF. Craig Davis turns and Mr. XWF holds his hands in the air letting the bat drop.
Mr. XWF: I WAS JUST GIVING YOUR ASS A WEAPON!! IT LOOKED LIKE YOUR BIZZZICTH ASS NEEDED IT!
CRACK!
Craig Davis gets hit with the steel basball bat again. This time the swing came from Agony, who picked up the bat immediately after it hit the ground. Craig Davis drops to one knee from the blow and shakes his head as Agony prepares to strike again.
SMASH!
Agony gets knocked down by a flying chair that was tossed by Mr. XWF.
Mr XWF: THOUGHT YOU COULD USE A CHAIR UP IN HERE!!!
Craig Davis climbs to his feet and takes the oppertunity while Agony is distracted to hit Agony with a Spinning Back Fist followed by a Strong Overhead Punch. Agony goes down and Craig Davis covers for the pin.
BAM!
Steel steps come crashing down onto Craig Davis before the count could even begin. Mr XWF tossed them into the ring and thwarted Craig Davis' pin attempt. Craig Davis rises to his feet and glares at Mr. XWF.
Mr. XWF: OH YOU WANT TO GET UPSET ABOUT ADMIRAL APENDAGE'S HELP! YOU UNGRATFULL MUUTTHHAAARFUUUKKKKAAAA!
Craig Davis focusing on Mr. XWF fails to notice Agony rise to his feet. Agony flies with a Shining Wizard that takes Craig Davis down. Craig Davis tumbles from the ring and lands right in front of Mr. XWF. Craig Davis slowly rises to his feet to receive an immediate ROCK BOTTOM! Mr. XWF picks Craig Davis up and tosses him into the ring. Agony walks over to the broken and crumpled body of Craig Davis and covers for the pin.
...1
...2
BOOM!
Boom? What the fuck? Mr. XWF tossed a bowling ball into the air and it landed onto Agony as he was pinning Craig Davis. Why did it make a boom sound when it landed? More importantly, where the hell did Mr. XWF pull a bowling ball from? He was just making the count too so he wasn't near the outside of the ring anymore, meaning he didn't pull it from under the ring. Where did that thing come from? Agony glares at Mr. XWF burning invisible holes into Mr. XWF with his eyes. Instead of attacking Mr. XWF though Agony covers for the pin again.
...1
...2
...THREE!!!
Winner: Agony
Agony jumps to his feet and immediately hits Mr. XWF with a Pendulum Chokeslam. Agony then begins stomping on Mr. XWF's head and chest while Mr. XWF is down. Mr. XWF grabs Agony's leg and tosses him down. Both Mr. XWF and Agony climb to their feet and Mr. XWF collides with Agony delivering a Diving Headbutt. Agony stumbles back and shakes his head to regain focus. Agony then charges at Mr. XWF hitting Mr. XWF with a Running Enzuigiri.
Mr. XWF is down!
Agony is going for the FTW UFO E1999 TITLE that Mr. XWF currently possesses!!!
Agony covers Mr. XWF for the pin as another referee rushes to the scene!!!
...1
...2
...THREE!!! He's done it! He managed to win his match even with Mr. XWF as the referee AND he has taken Mr. XWF's title from him in the process! Unbelievable!
New FTW UFO E1999 Champ: Agony
Tyler Vegas
- vs -
Luca Arzegotti
Standard Match
Tyler Vegas is in the ring and awaiting the arrival of his opponent for tonight. Tyler seems to be in a bad mood and is yelling at some of the fans for some reason.
As the opening chords of Rise Against's "Give It All" play, Luca Arzegotti stands at the top of the entryway, slightly smiling at the crowd. As the first verse starts, he walks down to the ring, lip synching the lyrics and paying no attention to the crowd. He gets on the apron, smirks at the crowd, and does a backflip over the ropes, to the applause of his manager, Victoria Serapin.
Tyler and Luca face one another as the ref calls for the bell and the match begins! They lock up and Luca wrenches the arm of Tyler, then clubs the arm with his own forearm before whipping Tyler into the corner and following up immediately with a clothesline into the turnbuckle which sends Tyler down onto his ass in the corner. Luca backs up a few steps and runs foward, blasting Tyler in the face with a low dropkick and smashing his head back into the turnbuckle behind him!
Luca grabs Tyler's leg and pulls him toward the center of the ring. He kicks the leg and releases it, jumping forward with a double foot stomp right onto Tyler's chest!
Suddenly... the fans rise to their feet as a man walks out from the back!
IT'S SHANE
!!!
Luca turns his attention to
and seems unsure of what the XWF owner could want.
: Pardon the interruption, Luca, but I wanted to let you know that if you happen to throw that piece of trash into the bay it will be a much more impressive way to win IN MY EYES... and by all means, I am the guy you would want to impress around here.
The fans give a mixed reaction as Shane is basically asking Luca to rid the XWF of Tyler Vegas once and for all!
: You've already got him down and out. Why not completely dispose of him so none of us ever need to look at him again? There might even be a bonus in store for you. I've had my eye on you for a while now and this could very well be the defining moment in your XWF career... Think about it...
Shane drops the mic and turns around, disappearing to the back and allowing Luca to think over what he's said.
Luca looks down at Tyler who is still in pain and then Luca looks off into the distance, into the bay...
Standing 450 splash to Tyler out of nowhere!
Luca pulls Tyler toward the ropes and then pulls him out under the bottom rope to the outside! He's going for it! He delivers a few hard stomps to Tyler along the way and eventually drags him all the way to the edge!!!
No! Not another man into the bay!
Luca pulls Tyler up and right into THE MEDIA OCCUPATION! (i.e. Omega Driver)
Tyler bounces off the edge and into the water with a huge splash!!! It's almost the exact same thing we all saw Gabriel Harding do earlier tonight, and with the same move variation! (omega driver)
The ref calls for the bell as Luca Arzegotti is announced the winner and he looks into the camera.
Luca: That's the right way to pull off that maneuver. You watching, Harding?
Ooooh! A direct message to the man who shares basically the same finishing move as Luca Arzegotti! Will these two cross paths in the near future?
Winner: Luca Arzegotti
Danny Devia
- vs -
Stagger Jones
- vs -
Neil Capra
- vs -
Unknown Soldier
X-treme Bloodbath Elimination Battle Royal
RULES: Opponent must be bleeding from TWO body parts and THEN thrown over the top rope to the floor
The fans are getting restless as we await our sixth match of the evening between Unknown Soldier, Neil Capra, Stagger Jones, and Danny Devia. Closing in on the main event, we are brought here to witness return of XWF veteran Unknown Soldier as he squares off against three XWF rookies here tonight. The match... is an Xtreme Bloodbath Battle royal match, meaning that you must first make your opponent bleed from two body parts before elevating them over the top ropes for elimination. If the opponent is not bleeding, or only from one body part, they can not be eliminated.
Tonight we want Bloodshed on Shove It Saturday Night! If theirs not blood dripping off the edge of the arena by the end of the night... Then we haven't done our job.
The four wrestlers stand at the turnbuckles awaiting the starting bell.
It appears that Unknown Soldier has in fact, bit his own arm, causing it to bleed. That was a very foolish mistake as he will now face a handicap of being down one bleeding body part. It doesn't seem to phase him, however, as he continues gnawing at the dripping blood. The referee stares at him awkwardly before sounding the bell and the Bloodbath Begins!
Soldier immediately charges Neil Capra, but is met with a reversal and a german suplex that sends him down to the mat.
Soldier is going to have to rely heavily on his hardcore and high flying if he stands a chance against the rookies who are more wrestling focused stars. Soldier slides under the bottom rope to avoid further beatings from Neil Capra, who has now turned his attention on the fight between Stagger Jones and Danny Devia. Capra smashes Devia in the face with few right hands before catching a series of fists of his own from Stagger Jones.
Apparently Capra thought that Jones would team up with him to attack Devia. He was wrong.
Soldier is now on the outside of the ring, and he's found a basket of goodies to toss in the ring for himself and the rest of the competitors. Two steel chairs, a mallet, and a table that he slides under the ring.
Jones wastes no time, nods to Soldier, and then picks up a chair and proceeds to pummel both Capra and Danny Devia. The first thrashing against Devia's side has caused his left hand to bleed. Now we have both Soldier and Devia bleeding from one body part, the others none. Jones is continuing his assault on Capra and Devia and doesn't realize that Soldier has managed to sneak behind him with the mallet.
BING!
Soldier clocks Jones over the top of his head and he drops like a sack full of potatoes. But unfortunately for him, Danny Devia is behind him and lands a wicked reverse DDT that immediately sends Soldier to the mat.
Neil Capra and Jones have now started a major battle on the outside of the ring. Both managed to flee the scene of all the carnage inside the ring as Devia continued laying into Unknown Soldier with a fury of kicks and elbow drops inside the ring.
Capra connects with a butterfly suplex that causes Jones to fall unconscious to ground on Devthe outside of the arena. Devia appears to be losing his grip on Soldier, who has managed to reverse his irish whip. Duck under a clothes line and connect with a flying clothesline. Devia is out as Capra continues dominating Jones on the outside of the ring. Capra hits Jones with the pile driver and proceeds to wrench in a standing arm bar hold from behind. Choking Jones and sending him nearly to sleep until...
OFF THE TOP ROPE INSIDE THE RING
SOLDIER flies...
landing on top of the duo without notice.
All three men have now collapsed on the outside of the ring... It appears that the moonsault has opened up a wound from underneath Capra's eyebrow. Now everyone expect for Jones has only one body part bleeding. Devia is the first one stirring of the four inside the ring. He reaches his feet and begins setting up the table in the middle of the ring. Soldier is second to his feet and it looks as if he's enthralled by Devia setting up the Table. Devia isn't expecting him entering the ring so quickly... Soldier climbs the turnbuckle again as Devia turns around....
THE DARK STAR!!! (Shooting Star DDT)
Unknown Soldier has hit his finisher on Devia and now his head has started to bleed.
This puts Danny Devia in a serious predicament as he's stuck in the ring. If he falls over the ropes he's out of the match...
The table is shattered in half in the middle of the ring as both wrestlers are laid out and are unable to move. Capra now crawls inside the ring as Jones still staggers on the outside. Capra picks up Devia, seeing he has no become the weakest link in the fight he intends to eliminate him. Devia ducks a clothesline from Capra, he's still alive! Flings Capra off the ropes and he comes back..
POWERSLAM!
Devia has come back to life here until...
Jones comes running from the other side of the ring with a steel chair. He's connected on Devia's face near the edge of the ring that causes him to fly over the top ropes and out of the match.
Danny Devia has been eliminated.
Now Jones has taken the upper hand here as he proceeds to take turns pummeling both Soldier and capra with the chair.
Soldier gets to his knees and is pummeled back down.
Jones goes back to Capra who is getting to his feet.
Another chair shot to his back... This one's struck blood by cuasing a scrape across the edge of his back and now Neil Capra has two body parts bleeding. The ring is now a scene of splattered blood and a pool in the middle where Devia's head was cracked open.
Just what the Shove It and XWF fans would expect from an Xtreme bloodbath match.
Jones has a massive upper hand now as stands on top of the turnbuckles taunting the crowd. The fans primarily booing as he basks in moment.
Soldier and Capra are climbing to their feet...
Jones wastes no time, tosses the steel chair to the side and helps Capra rise to his feet.
He should have went after Soldier, due to the fact that he was quicker, and it's going to make him pay as Soldier rushes at Jones and spears him into the turnbuckle.
Capra is now completely on his feet as he glances down at Soldier while both him and Jones lay down at the mat.
Capra looks away and goes back after the target whom was pummeling with a chair earlier. He picks up Jones and hits him with a Dragon suplex as Soldier climbs to his feet.
Capra turns to Soldier as they both stare looking back at one another. They both stare as Soldier stands next to Jones and brings him to his feet.
Soldier whips Jones towards Capra
Capra sets up...
OH MY GOD!
Jones has just went over the top rope as Capra elevated him over his shoulder over the ropes! Jones lands on his side where his hip starts to bleed.
and now Capra and Soldier have hooked up in the middle of the ring.
Tilt a WHIRL DDT by Capra and Soldier is down again. Jones is storming back in the ring and Capra is unaware of it. Massive dropkick and now Capra has gone down. Jones helps him to his feet and Soldier is right behind them.
Jones sees Soldier charging and the maniac prepares to hit another flying clothesline. Jones is prepared to take the fall as he pulls Capra towards the edge of the ropes...
Soldier clotheslines both and they both go toppling over the ring!
Neil Capra is eliminated!
Because Jones still needs to get another body part bleeding to get eliminated he still remains in the match. Soldier is climbing the turnbuckle again. Here comes another high flying maneuver but...
NO!
Jones has caught Soldier as he tries a suicide dive on top of him. Jones catches him in both his arms and
Wham...
Super body slam on the cement ground!
This battle royal has come down to two men. Who will have the most blood still flowing in their veins to stay in this match. Both men have lost substantial amounts of blood, which doesn't appear to have affected Soldier as he's been licking his hand throughout the entire match. Refueling perhaps?
Both men now stirring to their feet and Soldier is up first, he tosses Jones back into the ring, reaches under the ring apron and finds
A medieval spear!
It appears that Unknown Soldier intends to get the blood flowing here.
Jones now getting to his feet inside the ring as Soldier slides underneath the low ropes again with the spear. Both men are standing and facing one another.
Soldier chucks the spear in Jones direction.
Jones attempts to grab the spear in mid air!
He's successful, but unfortunately his grip was right on top of the end of the pointy end of the spear!
He's cut open a slice in his hand and now has 2 body parts bleeding!
Jones immediately gets frustrated and throws the spear back at Soldier!
Soldier, being the deranged buffoon that he is, decides that he's going to catch it in his mouth, but instead it goes right through his tongue and opens up a wound.
Both men now bleeding from 2 body parts, all we need now is for an elimination over the top ropes.
The ring is full of blood as Soldier yanks the spear from his tongue, licks his lips and smiles.
Let's do this..
Both men charge at each other...
Dropkick by Jones sends Soldier flying backwards as he nearly topples over the top ropes, but manages to pull his weight back over and avoid being eliminated. Jones charges and Soldier who ducks a clothesline.
Jones is quick to return fire by hitting Soldier with a DDT. Jones has the upper hand once again in this bout, although Soldier is rising to his feet much faster this time and they both lock up in the middle of the ring..
Soldier's got him set up for something big here...
NO!
Reversed into a scoop slam by Jones. Jones has a serious plan of action now as he lifts Soldier back to his feet again. Sets him up...
Yes!
STAGGERSAULT! (Lionsault into double knee drop)
The fans are now cheering as the blood is so thick on the canvas of the mat that it causes Jones to slip and fall...
Providing Soldier with ample opportunity to recover.. But it appears that he'd rather lick the blood off the mat then continue in this match.
His eyes gleam up at the audience as he licks the blood off the ground profusely, not seeming to care about the fact that he's in a match or Stagger Jones about to pummel him within the next minute or so.
Jones lifts Soldier to his feet and they are right up against the ropes. Jones is trying to force him over but Soldier isn't giving in.. Fighting, scratching, and clawing to try and stay in the ring.
Jones surrenders his attempt and attempts to whip Soldier in the ropes on the other side, reversal by Soldier who is now trying an irish whip of his own...
Reversed again by Jones as the two are now spinning each other around like dance partners... Gaining momentum until...
Soldier takes the upper hand, he's gained enough momentum to..
FLING JONES OVER THE TOP ROPE!!
This one is over!!!
Winner: Unknown Soldier
The Soldier makes his mark again here in XWF as he makes a very big statement to the rest of the XWF roster here tonight. He's back... and it looks like he hasn't lost a step.
Unknown Soldier now begins making a snow angel out of all the blood on the canvas...
He's won...
and he's achieved his ultimate prize...
Blood everywhere!
MAIN EVENT - Part 1
North Korean Championship
Lexi Sheckler
& Griffin MacAlister
- vs -
Cyren
& Sarah Saint James
"Unwilling Partners" X-tremely Greedy Tag Match, 1 Fall
The fall can be via Pinfall or Submission
The person who scores the winning fall WILL BE the North Korean Champion!
We return to The Float where the fans have become antsy. These ruthless fans want to see someone shoved into the Bay! The Singapore fans have even gone out of their way to learn a chant in English:
“INTO… THE… BAY! INTO… THE… BAY! INTO… THE… BAY!” …
Let’s get on with it so we can make their dreams come true!
Sky Cams pan across the audience as they restlessly move in their seats. The lights slowly dim as a purple and pink haze illuminate the arena as Sail by Awolnation begins playing over the PA system throughout the arena. The fans let out a wave of boo's and negative chants as Sarah Saint James appears from behind the X-Tron curtain and stops at the top of the stage ramp. As the music continues to play she slowly lifts her hands above her head seductively swinging her hips as her hands slowly drop running across her bare cleavage down to her hips as a sprinkle of golden arcs fall from the ceiling.
Sarah then continue her way down the stage ramp ignoring the stretching hands of fans making sure to give them a disgusted look as she passes. She stops in front of the ring and lifts one leg onto the edge of ring and runs her hands down it, the grabs the bottom rope and lifts herself one to the edge of the ring doing the splits, her thong teasing the male and female audience as she bounces up and down momentarily. She then ducks under the bottom rope pushing her body forward and onto her hands and knees as she slowly and sexually crawls to the center of the ring finally standing to her feet as pyrotechnics shoot out from all four turnbuckles
“From Seattle Washington: Sarah Saint JAMES!”
“And her partner…”
Cyren floats down to the ring as “Run” by Gossamer plays.
“Her partner from Dublin Ireland is an XWF legend: CYREN!”
“And their opponents… Making his way to the ring first…”
“These Two Boots of Mine” by The Bruisers plays as Griffin MacAlister marches down to the ring.
“From Madison, Wisconsin, he is ‘The Mechanic,’ and a former North Korean Champion: Griffin MACALISTER!”
“And his partner…”
The instrumentals to "Broken Hands" by Lamb of God blares out into the arena. As always, it is welcomed with loud jeers. "Motherfucker of the Year" herself, Lexi Sheckler, appears at the top of the ramp as she extends her arms out into the crucifix position. With confidence, Sheckler starts walking down to the ring, stopping at the left side of the guardrails. She steps up onto the steel, spitting into the fans faces with a proud smirk. Before jumping off, she mouths off to them, giving them the finger to all who dare chant profanities at her. Wandering to the right side now, she repeats the same grotesque actions. Pushing the fans, spitting on them, swearing at them, brings them to their feet, as Lexi Sheckler has never had a problem doing. She slides into the ring on her knees, jumping to her feet without the added assistance of her hands. She climbs up onto the turnbuckle, extending her arms out once again into the crucifix. Letting the hate of the crowd flow through her, she jumps down into her corner, and slings her arms over each side of the ropes, crossing one ankle over the other, sarcastically waiting for her opponent.
“From San Clemente, California, and representing The Black Circle. She is the reigning North Korean Champion: Lexi SHECKLER!
Remember, this match is one fall. Sheckler and Griffin must work as a team against Cyren and James. The North Korean Title can change hands based on who scores the winning pin or submission.
Lexi and James are starting things off here as the opening bell sounds.
Both ladies lock their hands as they engage in a test of strength in the center of the ring. James is able to push Lexi down to one knee. But Lexi bursts up to her feet and pushes James all the way down. She sits on top of James and lays into her with some rights and lefts. The North Korean Champion is looking strong in this match so far.
James turns onto her belly in order to avoid Lexi’s punches. That ends up being a costly mistake though as Lexi is now able to put her into a rear naked choke with ease. James can’t breathe; she’s being choked out right here in front of us. The referee goes to check James’ arms.
...1
...2
Griffin runs in with an elbow drop to his partner! What the hell. He drags Sheckler to his team’s corner, steps out onto the apron, and then tags himself in by smacking her on the tit! Is Griffin high? Of course he is.
Griffin walks into the ring now as Lexi looks on like ‘what the fuck?’
Griffin kicks James into her back. He gives her a running leg drop as well before turning her over and pinning her.
...1
...2
Lexi interrupts the count.
This is the strangest tag team match we’ve ever seen. The tag partners refuse to let each other get the pinfall. It has to do with that damn North Korean Title change stipulation that Shane DICK
tagged onto the match. What a DICK.
Griffin and Lexi get into an argument in their corner. Lexi spits in Duke face! Duke grabs Lexi by her blonde hair, but Lexi slaps him! And that’s a tag. It counts as a tag, folks. Lexi is back in as the referee instructs Griffin to go back into his team’s corner. Griffin is PISSED.
But at that moment, Cyren has just been tagged in. He runs into Lexi with a big clothesline. Cyren pounds Lexi into the mat with a series of stomps. He then throws her into the rope. He tries to catch her on her way back, but Lexi catches him in the face with a Busaiku knee. Lexi is too much for Cyren, it seems. She covers Cyren
...1
...2
This time James interrupts the count. That seems to please Griffin as he watches on from his corner.
Lexi sits up and goes to work on James with some forearms. She kicks James in her midsection, throws her up onto her shoulders, and drops her with a Psycho Driver! James is finished after that move.
But at that moment, the legal man Cyren jumps Lexi from behind with some punches to her head. With Lexi leaned up against the corner, Cyren runs in for a corner drop kick, but Lexi moves out of the way. Cyren hits the corner viciously as Lexi stands back up. She takes Cyren by his foot, and smashes the side of his knee into the steel ring post. The attack is effective enough to keep Cyren down as Lexi drags him to the center of the ring. She runs off the ropes, and delivers a double stomp onto the chest of Cyren. She goes for a cover.
...1
...2
Griffin tries to interrupt with an elbow drop, but Lexi sees it and moves out of the way. Griffin ends up landing on top of Cyren instead! Griffin sits up, and looks up at Lexi. Lexi then knocks him out of the park with a Buzzsaw kick into the side of his head.
James runs in for an attack, but Lexi gives her a spinning heel kick.
Lexi throws James over the top rope.
Griffin catches Lexi as she turns around with a kick though. He gives her a DDT, and then drags her to their corner. With Lexi down and out, Griffin is able to tag himself back in.
Griffin goes to work on Cyren with some more punches.
Griffin throws Cyren into the ropes, and whips him around with a powerslam. He pins Cyren.
...1
...2
Lexi pulls Griffin off of James. The referee gets onto Lexi; he’s clearly fed up with the antics of Team Griffin-Lexi.
That distraction allows Cyren and James to double team Griffin. This isn’t good because if one of them pins Griffin then Lexi loses her title!
Cyren and James give Griffin a double irish whip into the ropes. They have some kind of move planned, but Griffin counters with a diving double clothesline!
Breaking away from the match: The audience is starting to become restless as they notice a twister in the water. What the hell is a water twister doing in this area?
Griffin and Lexi look over at the water twister. They are amazed by the sight, but they quickly focus their attention back on the task at hand. Griffin drops Cyren on his head with a piledriver, and pins him.
...1
...2
Lexi interrupts the count. She isn’t read to lose her title just yet. The referee gets into it with her again. Griffin comes out of nowhere with a clothesline to the side of Lexi’s head!
Griffin pushes Lexi out of the ring with his feet, and then goes back to Cyren. He gives Cyren the P.O.A. (Code breaker into a Hell’s Gate).
Breaking away from the match: The water twister has just devoured a small Asian man from the audience! Holy shit, can we get a damn rescue team out here? This water twister is now on land as it moves through the float, pushing through the Asian fans. The fans don’t know what to do in this situation. The twister appears to be harmless as long as people move out of its path.
Asian man in front row: “HERRP US!!”
Lexi turns around and she’s met by the twister which is only three feet away. The small Asian man that got sucked into it earlier is seen being whipped around in the center of it.
The little Asian man who just had his clothes ripped off of his body from being inside the twister is gently placed in front of Lexi. Suddenly, the twister vanishes. Lexi looks as the nude Asian man, confused.
Suddenly, all of the lights go out! The entire float is in darkness. What’s going on?!
Ten seconds later…
The Asian man is gone, and in his place…
YOUR ANGEL!
What the fuck?!
Angel catches Lexi across her throat with an uppercut!
The lights go out again!
Ten seconds later…
They’re back on, and Your Angel is in the ring holding up Griffin MacAlister by his throat! Griffin had the P.O.A. applied just seconds ago until this enigma showed up in the form of a tornado, and took away our light source.
Griffin kicks his feet as he has nowhere to go.
Lexi runs in to attack Your Angel but the lights go out again! Fuck, again with the lights?
Five seconds later, they come back on, and Lexi has replaced Your Angel! Lexi is now holding up Griffin by his throat after some crazy switcheroo. Lexi doesn’t even understand what just happened.
Lexi release Griffin as she notices Cyren stirring up to his feet. She knocks Cyren out with a shining wizard! Lexi goes back to her corner.
At that moment, Griffin suddenly has an idea. He “tags” Lexi in by punching her across her jaw. What the hell?
Griffin then turns his attention to Cyren. He drags Cyren out of the ring and towards the first row of fans. He picks up Cyren, and places him into the hands of the fans. Cyren is now being crowd surfed through the Singapore fans… TOWARDS THE EDGE OF THE FLOAT! Oh my fucking God. Along the way, fans punch Cyren in his ribs as Griffin MacAlister follows behind. Cyren is kicking and struggling; he wants to get away from these rabid fans. The referee isn’t sure what to do at this point.
The crowd drops Griffin on the edge of the float, only about twelve feet from the drop off point where the Bay is waiting.
Griffin punches Cyren in the face some more. Griffin even lets some of the nearby fans punch Cyren in the face.
Griffin then proceeds to punch Cyren towards the ledge. Cyren is on both of his knees, begging Griffin not to go through with his plan.
Cyren: “Let’s talk about this.”
Griffin pulls a blunt out of his pocket and lights it.
Cyren: “Please…”
Griffin takes a drag from the blunt, places it into Cyren’s mouth, and then kicks Cyren
INTO
THE
BAY!!!!!!!
Holy shit, Cyren has just fallen blunt-first into the Bay! Griffin is laughing. Damn you Griffin, he’s a human being just like the rest of us!!!
Cyren tries to climb up the side of the float, but an octopus drags him down into the water!!!
Say goodbye to Cyren!
The referee just looks on in disbelief. Did Griffin really just let a blunt go to waste?
Anyway, the referee’s ruling is that Sarah Saint James and Lexi Sheckler are the two legal participants in the match. This isn’t good for Griffin. He’s gotta make his trek through all of those crazy fans, all the way back to the ring from the edge of the float.
But wait, SEBASTIAN DUKE runs into Griffin with an ASMODEUS CANE shot to his chest! Holy fuck, he had to of bent that cane over the chest of Griffin. What the hell is Duke doing here? Griffin is now on the ground gasping for air. That son of a bitch Duke and his fucking cane!
Back in the ring: Lexi just hit James with an enzuigiri. She then gives James the King Me (Barry White Driver), and covers her.
...1
...2
...THREE!!!
Sheckler retains the title after Duke took Griffin out with his cane.
In other news, an octopus had Cyren for dinner.
WINNERS: Lexi Sheckler (Still champion) and Griffin MacAllister
A few minutes after the others have made their way to the back, Griffin MacAlister remains at ringside still recovering from all he's been through in this match. He makes his way back into the ring and seems to be in a lot of pain as he begins to address the crowd.
Griffin MacAlister: Well that was a hell of a match wasn't it? I've had a lot of emotions run through me tonight but I'll tell you what one of them was not... "Fear." Fear is being pushed onto this roster by the threat of being tossed, shoved or hell even tripping into the bay. It's tragic really. Tragic to think someone falling into the bay will lose everything and have to suffer not only begging for their job back but also surviving getting back to the states first. Plus doing it all with their bank accounts wiped clean. It's shocking really. Scary and frightening shit right there...that concept.
Griffin smirks as he exits the ring, walks slowly over to the edge of The Float, and peers down into the cold depths of the water.
Griffin MacAlister: Some people see this as an unthinkable fate. A grueling test no person should ever have fallen upon them. However I look at things a bit differently. I say, I think I'll accept the challenge willingly! I say, I think it's time to take a swim in the bay!
Griffin tosses the mic and suddenly Shane
emerges from the back. Shane looks on and for a second both Griffin's and Shane's eyes lock. Griffin brandishes 2 middle fingers towards Shane
as he lets himself drop backwards. Backwards off The Float and into the water. Griffin just sacrificed himself to the bay! An attempt at defying Shane
and the Shove It In The Bay stipulations. Griffin MacAlister just quit the XWF! Cameras zoom in on the cold waters as quickly as possible and find no sign of Griffin MacAlister.
The list of names that have already been tossed into the bay (or jumped in willingly) is astonishing! We've already seen the likes of HUGE NAMES like John Madison, Cyren, and Griffin MacAlister among others... what can possibly happen next???
Stay tuned for the second of our DOUBLE MAIN EVENT. You will want to tune in and see how this show ends as it will involve several twists and turns that could even effect people NOT on the Saturday roster!!! This will be a must see ending!
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