![[Image: qtjAJzn.png]](http://i.imgur.com/qtjAJzn.png)
United Center
Chicago, Illinois
Tyson Fury
- vs -
Cory Scarecrow
Standard Match
Mastermind
- vs -
Shelby Cobra
- vs -
Ezekiel Carter-Williams V
Triple Threat, 1 Fall
Lucius Fyre
- vs -
JACK
Standard Match
Jill Lorder
- vs -
Ghost Tank
Standard Match
Loverboy Vinnie Lane
- vs -
Peter Gilmour & Morbid Angel
Handicap, 1 Fall
Guest ref: Mr. WGWF
Frodo Smackins
- vs -
Mr. WGWF
X-treme Rules
Loser gets fisted by Shane Anonistrator!!!
MAIN EVENT
Maverick
Venomous
The Horseman
- vs -
Evertrust
Gein
Hysteria
Trio Tag, 1 Fall
|
Tyson Fury
- vs -
Cory Scarecrow
Standard Match |
The bell rings and the match is underway. Scarecrow connects with the first move a flying elbow that sends Fury stumbling backwards into the ropes but he uses that and propels himself off like a freight train and decimates Fury with a flying clothesline. Fury immediately gets back up to his feet, lifts his opponent in the air and sends him crashing back down to the mat via a Gorilla Press Slam that rocks the ring.
Fury doesn't even bother with a pin instead he picks his opponent back up and then spins him around and plants him with a tilt a whirl powerslam. Again no pin but this time he nails Scarecrow right across the face with a leg drop. And this time hooks the leg for the pin.
1…
2…
Kick out!
Scarecrow kicks out and Fury looks, you guessed it, furious. Puns abound. Tyson gets back to his feet, pulls Scarecrow up with him and whips him into the corner with such force that Scarecrow almost splits in two mid section. Fury bull rushes Scarecrow and connects with another clothesline this one seemingly stunning his opponent. Fury them moves in, picks his dazed opponent up and places him on the top turnbuckle. He then reaches in and with both hands grips Scarecrow by the throat, he lifts him off the turnbuckle, spins around and chokeslams him to the mat.
Scarecrow’s body lays there in the middle of the ring almost devoid of life. Fury places one hand on his opponents chest and the ref begins the count.
1…
2…
3!!!
Winner: Tyson Fury
The red mist files out over the seats as Tyson Fury celebrates in the ring after defeating Cory Scarecrow handily. The theme song begins playing softly over the speakers.
The lights flash between red and black on the fog. Hysteria's back is shown as he ascends through the stage upwards. The music starts. Hysteria turns around and begins walking down to the ring. He gets to the ropes and slowly enters through them.
Hysteria stares straight ahead at Tyson Fury. The tension could be cut with a knife after all of the words Fury had spat in Hysteria's direction. After a minute more of just staring while the music plays, Hysteria rolls out of the ring. Fury looks confused as Hysteria just stares at him. Suddenly at the top of the ramp a light shines down to show Mickey 'The Martyr' Manson dragging Cory Scarecrow through the curtains under the X-Tron. Hysteria begins laughing and pointing at the face of Tyson Fury. His booming voice is heard over the speakers.
Another shall rise.
The scene cuts backstage to show one of XWF's newest members, Venomous, walking through the hallway, currently wearing Blue jeans, a pair of boots, a black short sleeve shirt. He seems to be very serious at the moment. He is heading to his locker room by the looks of it. Everything seems to be going just find until.....
WHAM
Venomous finds himself standing face to face with Gein, another new competitor in the fed, and one of his opponents in the main event tonight.
Venomous: Don't you know how to watch where you're going, or are you as blind as you seem?
Gein:Oh, fuck you.
Gein starts walking away.
Venomous: Well, next time, watch where your fucking going, before I shove my size 15 up your ass. Now if you know what's good for you, I suggest you get walking, before you get into some real trouble, and trust me, I am not someone you fuck with.
He pauses, turning around.
Gein: You don't scare me. You never will scare me. Your existence means nothing to me, so I highly suggest you should get away from me, calm down, then have a nice warm mug of go fuck yourself. That sound good?
The two stare each other down intensely, Venomous looks like he is going to snap, he begins to ball his fist up, squeezing them as hard as he can before they turn purple. Instead however, he finds himself slowly dropping his hands.
Venomous: See you in the ring, dumbass.
Gein: Don't make me laugh. It's not like you're a threat, is it? In the meantime, prepare for your loss, so it doesn't come as as much of a shock to you when you're lying on the ring canvas dazed and confused and our team is standing their with our hands raised high.
Venomous: Yeah whatever, if I were you, I would watch you fucking back, you may think I am of low talent, but I can, and will strike, at any opportune moment, and don't think that Maverick or Horseman won't do the same thing. Oh and if I were you, I would avoid confronting me like this again, I don't like your attitude, and I will shut you up. Should you go throwing it my way again. Do you understand me?
Gein just seems to laugh at him, although he more or less just glares at Venomous. The two turn, and go in opposite directions, they have avoided fighting this time, but you can't expect this to last. We'll wait and see what happens when these two confront each other in the ring later tonight, in the Main Event.
Mastermind
- vs -
Shelby Cobra
- vs -
Ezekiel Carter Williams V
Triple Threat - One Fall |
The three men circle around the ring as the bell rings. Mastermind charges forward and hits Cobra with a clothesline. Mastermind mounts her and begins delivering punch after punch to the face. Zeke just leans back against the ropes and lets Mastermind do his thing. Cobra then decks him in the face and rolls over on top of him. Cobra begins raining down forearms to the face of Mastermind. Zeke finally gets bored and locks in a headlock on Cobra and drags her off of Mastermind. Zeke locks it in tight as Cobra squirms to get away. Cobra drops down hitting a jawbreaker to Zeke who releases the hold to hold his mouth. Shelby Cobra climbs to the apron and hits a springboard twisting crossbody! Zeke hits the ground. Cobra taunts and picks him up. Zeke hits a thumb to her eye. Unbeknownst to them, Mastermind is climbing the turnbuckle. Zeke locks a headlock on and transitions it to an arm wrench into an arm drag. The two get close and eye to eye. They both turn and see Mastermind come flying and nails a DOUBLE FLYING CLOTHESLINE! Mastermind pumps his arms as he might have finally done some damage with THE MIND CHANGER!
Mastermind grabs Shelby Cobra and locks in THE MIND CONTROLLER! Shelby is crying out in agony and reaching for the ropes. Zeke is back up and he hits an elbow to the face of… SHELBY! Mastermind smiles, but looks concerned. Zeke walks over in front of Mastermind, spits into his hand, and slaps the hell out of Mastermind. Mastermind drops the hold and stands up toe-to-toe with Ezekiel. The two men are nose-to-nose spitting venom at each other. Mastermind looks at his hand and then SMACKS Zeke. Zeke turns back to look at him with a look of fury on his face. Zeke runs off the ropes and run towards Mastermind who catches him with a big clothesline! Mastermind covers him!
1…
2…
NO! Zeke rolls a shoulder up.
Mastermind picks him up and sets up for a DDT. Ezekiel flings Mastermind off and hits a running STO! Mastermind comes back up and Ezekiel catches him with a SWEET DREAMS! The fisherman faceplant demolishes Mastermind as Zeke covers him.
1…
2…
Th-NO! Shelby Cobra breaks it up.
Cobra bounces off the ropes and runs forward for the COBRA STRIKE! The running shining wizard knocks Zeke out cold so it seems. Cobra hooks a leg as the referee counts.
1….
2…
Th-NO! Mastermind broke it up!
Mastermind picks up Shelby Cobra and hits a DDT! Mastermind picks up Zeke, but Ezekiel punches him in the gut. Ezekiel stands up and hits ANOTHER WAY TO DIE! The Canadian Destroyer spikes the head of Mastermind into the ground. Cobra is up and takes a roundhouse to the face. Ezekiel lifts Shelby up and drives his knee into the jaw of Shelby with THE RIVER OF BLOOD! The GTS knocks Shelby for a loop. Zeke covers her!
1…
2…
Th-NO! Shelby rolls a shoulder up.
Zeke gets up and hits a devastating LAST BREATH SUPERKICK! Cobra crumples to the ground as Zeke covers her.
1…
2…
Th-No!
Mastermind breaks it up just barely. Zeke gets up and stomps away on Mastermind. Ezekiel stands up and motions for Mastermind to get up. Mastermind staggers to his feet and turns directly into ANOTHER LAST BREATH SUPERKICK! Mastermind collapses upon impact and isn’t moving. Zeke falls on top of him smirking as he does so. The referee gets into position.
1…
2…
Th-NO! Cobra breaks it up. Zeke looks like he’s about to blow a gasket!
Zeke is up and looking pissed off. He mounts the body of Cobra and pounds away at the head of Cobra. He punches and punches until blood starts squirting from the nose of Shelby Cobra. Zeke stands up. He walks over to Mastermind and picks him up. Mastermind comes to life and begins hitting tons of blows to the body of Zeke. Zeke is trying to fight him off, but Mastermind is pushing Zeke into the corner. Ezekiel tries to stop him, but Mastermind hits an uppercut and connects with a fisherman’s suplex. Mastermind holds the leg as he pins Zeke.
1…
2…
Th-NO! Zeke kicks out.
Both Zeke and Mastermind are quickly up to their feet but out of nowhere Cobra drills Zeke with a flying clothesline. He hits the mat and rolls out of the ring. Meanwhile Cobra gets back up to her feet and just then is hit with a clothesline of her own, this time courtesy of Mastermind. He then quickly moves into position and locks Cobra into The Mind Controller(Boston Crab).
Cobra tries to fight it but has nothing left and quickly submits.
Winner: Mastermind
Backstage, we see “Loverboy” Vinnie Lane sitting at a small table covered with water bottles. Several empties are strewn about on their sides, and Loverboy has one tilted back to his upturned face, chugging the water down in large gulps, as Big Daddy Cool Diesel walks up to him.
Diesel: Hey Shawn! I’m ready to help you out in your big match against Owen and Yoko tonight! What are you doing?
Loverboy finishes the water and tosses the empty bottle onto the pile, then wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and replies.
Loverboy: Big D, it’s good to see you, man? How’s the hammy?
Diesel: Probably real bad. But I’ll still help!
Loverboy: Diesel, man, I really appreciate all the help you’ve given me over the last few months, but tonight I need to do this on my own, comprende?
Diesel: But Shawn! Those guys outnumber you! What if you get hurt by a Banzai Drop? What if Sycho Sid comes to the ring to interfere?
Loverboy: I’m gonna be okay, big man. Just do this for me tonight, okay? Maybe you can come to ringside next Madness, dude.
Diesel: Well, you’re the boss, HBK. Even though I’m the WWF Champion, you’re my best friend in the whole world, and I’ll do whatever you want. Good luck, Heartbreak!
Diesel walks off, and Loverboy starts chugging another bottle of water.
Lucius Frye
- vs -
JACK
Standard Match |
The bell rings and the two men begin circling each other, each looking for an opening. Jack lunges forward for a tie up but is met with a knee to the stomach, sending him staggering back. Fyre quickly follows and begins unloading with punches to Jack’s face, backing him into the ropes where he unloads with an uppercut that sends Jack tumbling over the top rope and onto the ring apron. Fyre wraps Jack’s arm around his neck and lifts him up for a vertical suplex but Jack struggles mid-air and counters with arm drag that sends Fyre crashing to the mat. Fyre quickly gets to his feet and charges Jack, who hits a sunset flip and rolls through for a pin
1
2
Kick out!
Wasting no time, Jack holds on to Fyre’s legs and catapults him face-first into the turnbuckles. Jack charges and hits a running dropkick right into the back of Fyre’s head, dropping him to the mat. With one swift leap, Jack reaches the top turnbuckle with his back turned to Fyre. Jack leaps backwards….
Moonsault! Jack quickly hooks the leg for the pin.
1
2
Fyre gets his foot on the ropes. Jack slaps the mat in frustration and grabs Fyre’s head, lifting him to his feet. Jack delivers a couple quick punches to Fyre’s head and throws him against the ropes. As Fyre rebounds off the ropes, Jack ducks down for a backbody drop.
Fyre counters with a huge running uppercut! Jack staggers backwards for a moment and quickly staggers forward, right back into Fyre who kicks him in the stomach and hoists him up onto his shoulders. Jack struggles to free himself from the grasp by Fyre braces himself and hits a fireman’s carry powerbomb in the center of the ring! Fyre places a foot on top of Jack’s face and orders the referee to drop for the count
1
2
Jack throws the boot off his face, gasping for air. Fyre begins stomping away at Jack while screaming at him to quit. Jack attempts to pull himself up by grabbing a handful of Fyre’s jeans but Fyre steps over his arm and drops his shin right down onto Jack’s throat, Fyre pulls on the back of Jack’s head to complete the mounted gogoplata. Jack swings wildly at Fyre’s face, coming up just short over-and-over again. As Jack begins to fade, Fyre drives his shin harder into the throat of Jack. Jack reaches up once more for Fyre’s face and this time manages to push Fyre’s head backwards right into a kick from Jack to the back of the head, loosening the grip. Fyre falls to the side of Jack who continues peppering him with short kicks to the side of the head from his back. The two slowly make it to their feet, trading punches. Fyre manages to stagger Jack back a few feet with a couple stiff uppercuts, and then charges forward.
Scoop slam!
The momentum of the slam by Jack shakes the entire ring as Fyre bounces off the canvas and immediately grabs for his back. Jack struggles to shake the cobwebs off and rolls underneath the bottom rope and uses the ropes to climb to his feet. Fyre attempts to make it to his feet, still clutching his back. Jack measures the reeling Fyre and springboards off the top rope, hurling his body towards Fyre
He connects with the springboard rana!
Fyre goes flipping through the air as Jack crashes down right next to him. Jack crawls over to him and lays across the downed Fyre for the pin.
1
2
Shoulder up!
Jack simply rolls of Fyre and lays on the canvas for a moment. Jack grabs Fyre’s arm and slowly lifts him to his feet. Jack wrenches the arm overhead and whips him forward, but he holds onto the arm and pulls Fyre back towards him.
Bloody Blade out of nowhere!
Fyre’s counter sends both men slamming down to the canvas, neither man stirring. The ref steps in and begins to make the count.
1
2
3
4
5
Fyre begins to make the climb to his feet.
6
Fyre manages to make it to his feet and quickly shoves the ref out of the way as he charges over to the still downed Jack. With an evil smirk, Fyre drops a knee across the back of Jack’s head. Fyre lifts Jack to his knees and backs him into the corner with a vicious elbow to the face. Jack crumples in the corner for just a moment before Fyre lifts him by his legs and perches him on the top turnbuckle.
Frye ascends the turnbuckle and locks Jack's head but Jack fights back with a few well placed kidney shot, the last of which sends Frye falling backwards to the mat. Frye slowly gets back up as Jack stands on the top turnbuckle, he looks down at his opponent and leaps off catching Frye with a perfectly placed corkscrew senton.
Both men come crashing down to the ring but Jack manages to crawl over for the pin.
1...
2...
3!!
Winner: JACK
Fyre and JACK are standing off. Both men are dripping with sweat as they stare off. Suddenly, the LIGHTS SHUT OFF! A red mist blows into the arena as JACK turns looking through the smoke. Fyre is standing straight up in the ring and smiling largely at JACK, knowingly.
JACK! The Asylummmmm is hereeeeeee!
JACK turns around and is blindsided by a shadowy figure...
IT'S HYSTERIA!
Hysteria has a baseball bat in his hand and begins smashing it on the back of JACK!
Another shadowy figure has shown up.
IT'S GEIN!
Gein has something in his hand... it's a large bucket. Gein smiles as he leans down and pours the contents of the bucket on top of JACK. The liquid seems to be burning JACK! Hysteria snaps his fingers and points at Fyre. Fyre rolls under the ropes and grabs something from under the ring. He rolls back in with another bucket and pours the contents out. It's feathers!!!
Hysteria begins laughing wildly as the lights go out.
They shine back on to reveal JACK alone in the ring having been tarred and feathered by The Asylum. A booming voice comes over the speakers.
Jill Lorder
- vs -
Ghost Tank
Standard Match |
The bell rings and the corners of Tank’s mouth curl up as he grins at Jill Lorter. Jill motions for Tank to bring it. Tank charges forward surprising Jill as he nails her with a spear! Her body crashes to the mat! Tank covers!
1…
2-NO!
Jill powers out. Tank pulls her to her feet by her hair and lifts her up with ease into a gorilla press position. Tank bellows out as he drops Jill across his knee in a gutbuster. Jill rolls away holding her abdomen as Tank stalks after her. He grabs her by the hair again and she decks him hard. She hits a snapmare and locks in a butterfly lock! Tank is thrashing back and forth, but can’t seem to shake her off. Tank begins standing up as Jill begins hitting striking knees to the ribs. Tank begins grimacing as he grabs the legs of Jill and flings her over his shoulder, falling back on Jill as he does. Jill releases the hold as she tries to catch her breath. Tank stomps away on the chest and abdomen region of Jill. He lifts her up and hits a German suplex… wait he didn’t release it! Tank rolls up and hits a second one! Followed by his trademark third! Tank looks pissed as he picks up Jill. Tank grabs her and squeezes her tight in a bear hug! Jill bears her teeth as she begins dissecting how to break out of the hold. With her arms exposed, Jill begins hitting three, four… almost fifteen strikes before Tank releases the hold. Tank charges forward and Jill gets low enough to use his momentum to hit a sick Samoan Drop! Tank is down holding his back.
Jill climbs the turnbuckle but staggers for a minute. Ghost Tank is up! He runs up the ropes and goes for the hurricanrana! BUT NO! Jill keeps him sitting upright and hits a SUPER POWERBOMB! Jill is exhausted from that move and just barely slumps her body over his. The referee gets into position.
1…
2….
Th-NO!
Jill doesn’t allow him to get up as she locks in a Fujiwara armbar. She’s wrenching it back so that his arm almost makes a 90 angle with his shoulders. Tank begins getting up, but Jill rolls herself on top of Tank as she uses her elbow to hold Tank’s arm in place. Tank flashes his teeth showing his frustration. Ghost Tank finally gets his feet under him and flings Jill off. Jill doesn’t stop as she punches Tank in the face making him bounce off the nearby ropes. Jill grabs his wrist and whips him across the ring, but doesn’t let go as Tank comes back. Jill nails him with a knee to the gut. She whips him again and repeats the process for a second time! After Tank is weakened and staggering, Jill Lorder hits a Russian Legsweep taking Ghost Tank to the floor as she floats over into a pin!
1…
2…
3-NO! So close! Tank just narrowly got a shoulder up.
Tank pushes her off as she flings back into the referee knocking him down. Jill looks down at the referee in distress then back to Tank who is down still.
Frodo, or Simon, we're not sure at this point, runs down to the ring and delivers a massive right hook right to Jill Lorder's anus. His fist barely keeps from going in. He looks at the fist, sniffs it, then punches her in the jaw before running off to the back.
Jill stands back up and has an intense look of hatred in her eyes as she stares back up towards the entryway. She turns around and SPEAR!
Tank just plowed right through Jill! He head hit the mat with a nasty bump! Tank goes for the pin!
1...
2…
Th-NO! Oh my God that was so close! Jill just barely got a shoulder up.
Tank picks up Jill and begins punching her hard in the face! Green and blonde hair is flinging everywhere as it seems like an 80’s Hair Metal concert! Tank then kicks her in the abdomen and connects with TANK TRACKS! The Triple Powerbomb ended with a sitdown powerbomb leaves Ghost Tank pinning Jill Lorder.
1…
2…
3!
Winner: Ghost Tank
After the match was over, the lights dim to black and the red mist shows up again! The eerie theme song for The Asylum begins playing through the arena.
JIll begins searching the arena for the intruders. She turns around and is shocked to see three shadowy forms coming through the smoke. Hysteria, flanked by Gein and Lucius Fyre, stands there with his gloved hands in his jacket pockets. The three men begin slowly stepping forward. Jill takes a step back and bumps into Ghost Tank. Tank pushes her into the arms of Hysteria who slaps her. Gein punches her across the bridge of her nose. Jill falls to the mat and Fyre hands an object to Hysteria.
Hysteria shows the object to the audience and it's a pair of scissors!
Ghost Tank and Gein hold the arms of Jill as Hysteria begins laughing maniacally! He steps forward and grabs the long hairs of Jill. He slowly snips several of her hairs making her hair seem a little uneven and ragged looking on the right side. Hysteria begins laughing again as he hands the scissors to Lucius. Hysteria leans over Jill as he screams in a manic tone.
Ghost Tankkkkk! He's the newest member of THE ASYLUM! And Jill? THE Higher Power told me that you are not suitable for the XWF! You've been targeted. So go cryyyy all the way home little BITCH.
Hysteria backs up and hits The Ramification laying Jill out.
Hysteria begins laughing cryptically as the lights go black. They come back up to reveal Jill laid out in the ring with The Asylum gone.
Pest is lurking in the locker room after everyone else has left the room. He finds Lane's locker, and breaks the lock off. Pest begins to rifle through the man's belongings before he comes across a pair of silver tights, that he immediately begins to cut up with scissors, especially in the ass region. Leaving Vinnie's underpants to be exposed to the world when he fights. Then he finds the "Faster Pussycat" shirt, and removes a can of spray paint from his pocket and paints over the faster and cat part of the shirts, leaving it to say, "Pussy". He chuckles, and leaves the locker room
Loverboy Vinnie Lane
- vs -
Peter Gilmour & Morbid Angel
Handicap - One Fall
Guest ref: Mr. W.G.W.F |
Pest is standing the middle of the ring looking pleased. Morbid and Peter are in one corner, and Vinnie is in the opposite corner. He's about to call for the bell when he pauses before pulling something out of his pocket. It's Industrial Strength Bear Mace. He walks over to Vinnie and sprays him in the face with the bear mace, emptying the entire container on the MegaStar's face. Then he turns and walks over to Peter and Morbid and pretends to mace them before removing a taser from his pocket and tasing Peter in the balls. Peter goes down, holding his family jewels, allowing Pest the chance to grab the man's pants and start ripping them off. Peter tries to fight it, but he can't hold himself and protect his pants. Off they come! Exposing Peter's tighty whities to the world. Pest is not done, he reaches over to Peter's manhood and gives it a good tickle.
Thank John Madison for that.
He calls for the bell, and Morbid rushes over to Vinnie and delivers a massive big boot to the face of TMOYD, who is unable to see it coming. Peter is struggling to get to his feet, when Pest throws Peter's pants to the crowd right before kicking Peter in the face. Vinnie is busy trying to punch at Morbid, but is struggling to see him. A one punch manages to connect to Morbid's jaw. Morbid uses his giant monster hands to grab Lane by the throat and lift him to the sky. As Vinnie goes up he throws a powerful high knee to Morbid's jaw. The Beast stumbles back, and Lane manages to get free, and on the way down he wraps his arms around and uses his momentum to deliver a powerful DDT.
Peter gets up and drops Pest with a Gilmour CUTTER, sending him to the mat. Then he walks over to where Lane is laying boots to Morbid, and delivers another Gilmour Cutter that sends Vinnie on top of Morbid. Peter goes for the pin on both of them. He's hooked the leg and is waiting for the count. Waiting. No count. Vinnie uses the hooked leg to kick Peter in the face. Peter stumbles back, and Vinnie gets to his feet. He walks over to Peter, grabs him and sets up for a Black Label Driver. NO! Pest tases him right in the spine. Vinnie goes down, and Peter wriggles free, before getting up to be greeted with another taser to the balls. He goes down hard. Pest throws Peter's arm over Lane, and Lane's arm over Peter. He drops down and begins to count both men pinning each other!
1...
2...
3!!!
Wait, Pest now is claiming that pin didn't count because Peter and Vinnie both had feet on the ropes. Morbid is up and makes his way to Peter and Lane. He lifts both Lane and Peter up high in the air before slamming them together. Then separating them, and smushing their faces together as if trying to make them kiss. Vinnie manages to get one of his hands on Morbid's face and claws it. Morbid drops both people and Lane delivers a beautiful pumphandle driver on Peter. He springboards up and gets on the second rope before launching for a spectacular Leg Drop on Morbid, who tripped over Peter. It does not connect, Morbid managed to catch him mid air, and literally hold him in the air while the Giant gets to his feet. Still holding on, he throws the still slightly blinded rockstar into the barricade.
Morbid helps Peter up to his feet, before taking a taser to the neck from Pest. He does not go down, he turns around slowly. Pest throws the taser out of the ring, and points towards Vinnie who is slowly climbing back into the ring. Morbid punches Pest in the face, sending him to the mat, and leaving a few teeth in Morbid's knuckle. Vinnie came charging full speed at Morbidgod, but Peter intercepts with a Powerslam. But no! Vinnie reverse it and drops Peter with a spinning spine buster. Vinnie then gets up and rushes Morbid, only to be caught with a WG.WF Cutter from Pest.
He goes down, and Morbid goes for the cover.
1...
And a Gilmour Cutter to Pest stops the count. Morbid is trying to get Peter to count the pin and signal the bell, but Peter breaks it up and begins to kick Morbid in the ribs. He's screaming something about betraying him the last time they teamed up. Pest and Vinnie are both up, and lock eyes. Vinnie throws a haymaker to Pest's mouth, before delivering a gorgeous Snap Powerslam. Pest is down, and Vinnie goes for the pin. Demanding Peter or Morbid go for the pin.
Morbid decides instead to kick Vinnie in the face, sending him off of the ref. Pest starts getting to his feet, but GILMOUR CUTTER! Pest goes back down, and Vinnie gets Peter with a high knee to the back, sending him back down to the mat. Vinnie goes to attack Morbid, who runs and hits a Running Bulldog sending Vinnie to the ground. Morbid then lifts Vinnie up by the throat and drops him with a massive Choke Slam. Then he lifts Peter up by the head and sets him on the floor, before patting Peter on the head.
Suddenly out from the back emerges Shane Anonistrator with a mic in hand!
Shane doesn't look happy, or at least we assume that under his Charlie Sheen mask.
Shane: You idiots! All of you! I could even call you SHITTIOTS! This was supposed to be a serious match. I expected Morbid and Peter to actually come into this match with intentions of winning it, and I expected to see Mr. some shitty fed shove a dildo up Vinnie's asshole! What do I get instead? Peter and Vinnie pinning each other while they have a giggle mate? Morbid molesting Peter's head? Pest wasting all of his bear mace on one person when surely there was enough to go around?
Shane shakes his damn fucking head.
Shane: Morbid, I saw you claim victory at War Games as a strong team captain, only to move on to this week and barely be able to even motivate Peter Gilmour to put in real effort for this match! You should have been up his ass 12/7 like an anal wart, urging him on and beating the hell out of him each day that went by without him even preparing for the match! YOU are the only COMPETITOR in this match right now, Morbid, who was a captain at War Games and you failed to do what a captainly captain should do. You idiots had a two on one advantage and instead this match has turned into a clusterfuck instead of a one sided raping!
While Shane is talking to Morbid, Vinnie has time to recover and he surprises Morbid with a Black Label Driver! OH MY GOD! AND NOW VINNIE DELIVERS THE SAME MOVE TO PETER, LANDING IT RIGHT ONTO MORBID'S HEAD!
Shane: Hahahaha! These three waggle baggas want to be YOUR trio champions, everybody!
Shane looks at the crowd and laughs.
Shane: Imagine what a circus act a Trio match would be with these three morons on the same team trying to retain championships! It's actually quite hilarious! Wait, what's this?
Shane sees Vinnie pinning Morbid Angel and Peter Gilmour at the same time! Pest is still down, but starting to move a little. Shane runs down to the ring and slides in! He pulls Pest up to his feet... GILMOUR CUTTER!
Shane: some shitty fed can suck my dick!
Shane looks like he wants to hit Vinnie in the face to break up the pin but he stops himself and thinks about it... and then he just drops down and makes the count instead!
1...
2...
3!!!
Shane springs back up and pulls a potato out of his pocket, shoving it into Vinnie's mouth and then doing the same to Morbid Angel and Peter Gilmour! How many potatoes does Shane usually carry around with him? Looks like three at minimum.
Shane: Here is your winner! Vinnie Lane! And as far as I'm concerned these three DESERVE EACH OTHER! This right here in front of you all, XWF universe, is your team of XWF Trio Champions! A cross dressing hermaphrodite, a back ally crackhead who thinks he's a god, and Mr. Chicken à la King himself... Peter Fucking Gilmour! All hail the king! All hail your champions!
Shane runs past Pest and kicks him in the head just for the heck of it on his way out of the ring and up the ramp as the Trio Champs try to pull the potatoes out of their mouths but they're wedged in their pretty tightly.
A few seconds later, Frodo runs to the ring! He ignores Pest and Peter. He runs straight up to Vinnie and sends him to the ground with a Shayouken! Before pulling his penis out and pissing on Vinnie's head! He then puts himself away, and turns around to hit Morbid with a Superkick. The giant catches the Hobbit's foot, and uses his other hand to destroy Frodo's testicles. Frodo screams in agony, no, it's Simon! Morbid Angel just destroyed Simon's testicles! He then lifts the Hobbit up and throws him into the crowd, and he did it with Shane's potato still in his mouth! What a match!
Purple, Red, Yellow and Blue by Portugal. The Man begins playing as the crowd looks around not sure who is about to step out from the back. About 30 seconds pass and the crowd erupts as Theo Pryce makes his way out from behind the curtain like the Wizard of Oz, the Universal Title draped over his left shoulder and a microphone in his right hand. Theo remains standing on the stage looking out at the crowd soaking it all in before raising the microphone up to his face.
"Allow me to reintroduce myself."
The crowd again erupts in cheers, Theo returns their affection with a smile and a nod.
"My name is Theo Pryce and once again I am the King of the Castle, the man at the top of the mountain. I am the Universal Champion. And as absolutely thrilled as I am that I was able to take from Eli what he holds most dear it is not why I am here tonight gracing you all with my presence. No no...no. You see the reason I am here tonight is to offer you three a challenge. It seems that the Trios Championship has fallen out of favor around these parts. Hell I think the Goddamn things have only been defended twice in the last year. Not counting when they were won via tournament or handed off. Twice....in a fucking year. You'd think Peter Gilmour held the title for that entire time but he didn't. It's not a coincidence that during my short lived time with the belts as part of the trio team made up of my brother Sebastian, Azrael and myself that we defended them only a few shorts weeks after winning them. And what happened? We lost the titles and again, they went into the fucking tank never to be seen from again. Well that's not going to happen again, not on my watch.
So here it is, Lane, Morbid and Peter the three of you will meet me and my two guys in two weeks right here on Wednesday Night Warfare. Peter you want to lay claim to being a two time Trios champ, you'll have to successfully defend those titles in two weeks. Lane, you want to legitimize your title reign, two weeks. And as for your Morbid, last week you never got a chance to face me but now you will, in two weeks. Oh and don't you dare think of ducking this challenge. It's happening. And as an added bonus because I like you three so much I promise I will not be using The Black Circle as my partners. They had their moment but it's past now. It's a new day gentlemen. I hope you are ready for it."
Theo's theme music begins to play again as the Universal Champion turns around and heads back to the back.
Frodo Smackins
- vs -
Mr. W.G.W.F
X-treme Rules
Loser gets fisted by Shane Anonistrator!!! |
Bombshock by Hadouken! plays as Frodo makes his way to the lazily dragging a payphone behind him. He makes it down to the ring and tries to lift the Payphone into the ring, but needs Shane and the announcers to help him get it into the ring. Once inside he starts cheering like he did it all by himself.
William Control's Prologue plays as Pest and Barbie walk down to the ring. He's wearing a black cloak that says WG WF on the front. Once in the ring Barbie raises his hand in the air and he removes his cloak, which she holds and exits the ring.
Shane calls for the bell, and Pest and Frodo charge at each other. But something stops them! APM by Spamtec blasts over the PA and the sound of a dirt bike is heard coming from the back. Everyone looks up to the ramp to see Frodo and Crack coming storming out of the back on dirt bikes. Shane looks at the Hobbit in the ring, and it's Simon! Simon is everywhere! Frodo gets down to the ring with Crack in tow. Crack parks his bike by the announcer's table, while Frodo drives his bike into the ring. While still on the bike he charges at Simon, who manages to pull a Butterfilled Sock out of his pants and throws it at Frodo, knocking Frodo off the bike.
The bike goes out of the ring and hits a random fan in the face. Best day ever. Frodo and Simon lock up in the middle of the ring and begin to trade blows with each other. Frodo is thumping Simon in the socket where his eye was, and Simon is kicking Frodo in the shins. Pest and Shane look at each other, and shrug. Shane pulls a potato out of his pocket and begins to eat it raw. Frodo has Simon in a headlock and giving him a noogie. Simon is throwing fists to Frodo's ribs. One of them connects and sets Simon free. Pest runs in and hits them both with a double chokeslam. Both hobbits are down, and it's up to Crack to save the day. He grabs his cane and limps his way into the ring where he begins to assault Pest with the cane. Pest just laughs and kicks Crack in the knee, sending him down. Pest begins to stomp on Crack's bad knee, laughing as he does so. Simon is up, and delivers a Superkick to the back of Pest, sending him to the ground. He locks Pest's leg in perfect leglock, Simon has just delivered a perfect Demi Lovato Looks good in jeans! Frodo is pissed, but he goes to help Crack up and out of the ring. With Crack on the outside, Frodo hits a Cher Lloyd is a fuck ugly Gypsy Bitch.
Pest is trapped in the armbar, but manages to throw his free leg into Simon's face, freeing him of the hold. Pest stands up, pulling Frodo into the air with him. He slams the hobbit down on his back, releasing the arm bar. With both hobbits down, he begins to kick Simon in the face. Frodo sneaks out of the ring and searches around for something while Simon is getting abused. Pest lifts Simon up into the air and, SITOUT POWERSLAM! Simon is down. KEYBOARD TO THE HEAD! Frodo found his keyboard and introduced it to the back of Pest's head. Both Simon and Pest are down. Frodo positions it so Pest is covering Simon, and he lays on top for the pin.
1...
2...
3!!!
Shane shoves Frodo off and raises Pest's hand in victory.
Winner: Mr. WG.WF?
Frodo gets up and begins arguing about how he made the pin. Shane points out that Frodo wasn't a legal contender in the match. Simon and Pest were, thus Simon took the pin and lost. Pest gets to his feet groggily and lifts Simon into the air. Shane pulls Simon's pants down, spits on his hand, balls up his fist and shoves it straight into Simon's rectal canal. Simon begins to cry, but Shane goes further and turns Simon into a puppet. He pulls his hand back, along with Simon. Using Simon's hands Shane digs into his pocket and pulls out a potato, then jams it into Pest's mouth, and repeats for another potato which he shoves into Frodo's mouth. Laughing like a madman he turns and walks away.
Wait, out of the back… it’s “Loverboy” Vinnie Lane! He’s charging out of the locker room like a house afire!
Loverboy sprints to the ring and slides in underneath the bottom rope, springing to his feet and clobbering Frodo from behind with a huge forearm shot that sends the fake dwarf crumbling to the mat like a ton of bricks. Loverboy drops a knee across the back of Frodo’s skull, then stands up and turns to Pest.
What the heck? Is Loverboy on board with Pest here tonight? I thought they hated each other?
Loverboy gesticulates toward Pest, motioning for him to hold Frodo up so he can hit him with a superkick. Pest seems cautious and distrusting at first, but then nods his head and grabs the Big Dick Playa from the mat and holds him in a standing position in a full Nelson! Frodo is out cold, he can’t fight back!
Loverboy takes a step back, lines up the shot, and… SUPERKICK! Loverboy drilled Frodo right in the chin with that scintillating kick!
Frodo flops to the mat like a dead fish and Pest stands over him, smiling. Pest looks over and Loverboy with a big grin and holds his hand out to shake with Lane… and Lane shakes his hand! “Loverboy” Vinnie Lane sold his soul to Mr. WG WF? I don’t even have the words to… LOOK OUT!!
Loverboy suddenly spins Pest back towards him as he was trying to turn back to the match, then sends a swift kick to his midsection. In one fluid motion, Loverboy lifts Pest off of the mat, turns him upside down and drops him headfirst into the Black Label Driver! Pest’s head caroms off of the canvas and he lands unconscious in a heap next to Frodo.
Loverboy stands over the wreckage and screams at the top of his lungs.
Loverboy: Hey, you motherfuckers! You all can’t get enough of my dick… so I thought I’d come out and give it to you! Good thing I downed a few gallons of Gatorade earlier.
Loverboy then turns to the two bodies on the mat, right next to each other, and starts unfastening his tight vinyl pants. He pulls himself out of the fly and wrangles the thing with both hands, bracing himself by spreading his feet wider. Then, he starts shooting a hard line of piss all over the faces of the two knocked out competitors! His piss rockets out of him and he looks like a fireman trying to maintain control of a hose as he sprays them both with what look like half a gallon of urine.
After a few seconds, both Frodo and Pest are completely drenched in Loverboy’s piss, and he shakes off the last few droplets and zips himself back up. Grinning from ear to ear, the rock n’ roll megastar exits the ring and walks backstage. While Shane stands in the corner giggling like a school girl at what he just saw.
As Maverick makes his way to the ring, suddenly from out of nowhere he gets hit by a chair, The camera shows Mastermind holding the chair. He looks down at Maverick lying on the floor.
Mastermind looks up at the ring, and sees Maverick's team mates looking down. The lights go out, and when they come back on, Mastermind is now where to be seen.
MAIN EVENT
Maverick
Venomous
The Horseman
- vs -
Evertrust
Gein
Hysteria
Trio Tag, 1 Fall |
Maverick still slightly wounded from the attack he just sustained, Venomous, The Horseman, Evertrust, Mickey "Gein" Manson and Hysteria are all in the ring and The Horseman and Hysteria are going to start things off for their teams. Both men moving to the center of the ring as the crowd loses their shit, it's clear from the excitement and the battle stances of all these men that it's gonna be one helluva a fight here tonight! The ref signals for the bell and with that epic earth shattering chime... this match is on!
The Horseman coming at Hysteria with a Knife Edge Chop that connects with Hysteria with devastating effects as Hysteria flies back into ropes! Hysteria's body slams into those ropes and Horseman is full steam ahead right after him! Catching Hysteria with a few left and rights before Hysteria comes to life with Low Blow! Ouch! That's gotta fuckin' hurt! Horseman goes down to his knees and Hysteria nearly takes his head off with a Roundhouse Kick.
Horseman topples backwards and crashes to the mat as Hysteria joins him there. Slapping Horseman in the ass repeatedly like he's playing a set of bongo drums before yanking the man into an Ankle Lock!
The Horseman lets out a yelp that soon turns into a scream as Hysteria tightens that hold. Yanking that shit tight as fuck as Horseman squirms and wiggles about. Flailing around and really causing a ruckus as he tries with all his might to shake Hysteria but failing at every turn.
Hysteria's got a grip like a vice on that ankle! And no amount of hollering, thrashing or even kicks from Horseman's free leg can get that man off!
Hysteria's team is watching on and are cheering from their corner wildly. Their teammate is really getting the job done here and it actually looks like Horseman might be calling it quits. This might be the end cause Horseman seems to be in a lot of pain from that submission. Will this match be ending this early on?!?!
NO!
Horseman's rolling around like a fish outta water paid off and he's managed to wriggle himself close enough to the ropes to actually grab onto that bottom rope! With one quick reach and a white knuckled grip onto that rope, Horseman broke the hold! Hysteria punches the canvas in anger and screams in frustration as Horseman gingerly gets to his feet. With Hysteria's focus on the canvas though Horseman decides to test his luck and ambles quickly towards Hysteria.
It's shocking how fast that man can move right after almost having his ankle ripped off by Hysteria's Ankle Lock but that shit is happening and Hysteria isn't noticing. He must think like everyone else would and wrote off that Horseman's ability to be able to rush over like a maniac after what happened but like everyone else, Hysteria's wrong. And Horseman's racing at him like madman!
But just seconds before Horseman crashes into Hysteria, Hysteria shoots his head up and gets The Horseman with an Uppercut!
The Horseman flies up into the air a good ten feet and then crashes back onto the canvas so hard the whole damn ring shakes! Hysteria must be on some hardcore fuckin' steroids or some shit! Hysteria's also on the move and is now charging towards the fallen Horseman.
Hysteria's set to tear it up and really bring it but Horseman landed near his corner and is quickly relieved from duty with a slap on the shoulder from Maverick!
Yeah!
The fuckin' Iceman is in the mix now fuckers and he enters the ring by diving off the top rope! Soaring straight at Hysteria like a human torpedo Maverick is in full Diving Senton mode! Making one damn fine entrance here tonight! But like before Hysteria is able to know what's about to happen without actually seeing it himself and narrowly ducks outta the way of that Senton! Dodging to the side literally right before contact!
Maverick collides with that mat and Hysteria is right after with a Leaping Mulestomp! He crashes into Maverick and The Iceman surges in pain on the mat! After that Hysteria just starts sending a series of stomps and kicks down into Maverick who attempts to block the onslaught off the best he can.
Finally latching hold onto Hysteria's leg before yanking him down, Maverick swiftly takes this moment to his advantage and climbs onto Hysteria. Sending a swarm of Mounted Punches to a fallen Hysteria.
After this goes on for some time Maverick stops and climbs to his feet. Grabbing Hysteria by the scruff off his neck and pulling Hysteria up with him as he rises. From there it's a Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker followed by a Leg Drop and a then an abrupt Belly-to-Belly Suplex! That's right! After the Leg Drop Maverick just jumped to his feet and tore Hysteria back up only to send him back down with a Belly-to-Belly Suplex! And that combo of moves really put Hysteria out of commission!
As Hysteria lays there and groans in agony, Maverick goes for the pin!
1...
2...
Broken up by Mickey Manson!
Gein has broken up the pin with a Lionsault but that's not all! No! The ref gets in Gein's face screaming for him to get out of the ring. Maverick turns around and slaps hands with Venomous while Hysteria crawls to his corner reaches out and slaps Evertrust on the top of the hand, taking Hysteria's place as the legal man!
As that happens Venomous charges from across the ring at Evertrust. Hysteria sees this and without saying a word passes on this knowledge to his teammate who manages to duck at just the right moment. Venomous' face smacks off the turnbuckle and as it does Evertrust grabs it from behind and with a thunderous roar from the crowd takes his opponent down with a reverse DDT.
Gein and Hysteria both crawl down from the ring apron and make their way over to Horseman and Maverick.
Evertrust has taken full control of this match and is handing out massive beating on Venomous. Evertrust whips Venomous to the ropes and on the rebound takes him down with a forearm smash to the face. Evertrust then looks over at his two teammates who each have a hold of an opponent. Evertrust and his teammates lock eyes for a second and with a slight nod by Evertrust all three members of the team get into position. Each grabbing one of their opponents and...........................BOOM!!!
Maverick, The Horseman and Venomous all go down from a double arm DDT. Evertrust hooks the leg as the ref makes the count.
1...
2...
3!!!
Winner: Evertrust, Gein and Hysteria
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he forgets that he's supposed to be ignoring me. I have never been ignored so hard in my life before. This is the best ignore ever. Oh, and Lambchops, did you think pissing on me was going to insult me or anything? You have no idea who I am, you cumstain. None."![[Image: ZXX7HJw.png?1]](http://i.imgur.com/ZXX7HJw.png?1)
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