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B.O.B. D · (10-02-2020)

I can't believe I lost to MeFisto.

The thought ran through my head for the proceeding 24 hours that followed Relentless Day 1; to the point where I was constantly repeating it aloud like when Jim Carrey "had better" in the movie Liar, Liar.

After my wife picked me up from the stadium.

"I can't believe I lost to MeFisto."

Every few miles on the way back home.

"I can't believe I lost to MeFisto."

The last thing I said before going to sleep that night.

"I can't believe I lost to MeFisto."

The first thing out of my mouth after waking up from a myriad of MeFisto nightmares the next morning.

"I can NOT believe I lost to MeFisto.........."

During my morning shit.

"I can't believe I lost to MeFisto."

While brushing my teeth.

"I can't believe I lost to MeFisto."

Hell, it was even on my mind as I jerked my dick off while Krystal was at work.

"I................. can't believe....................... I lost...................... to................................ MeFistoooooooooooooo."

I couldn't even watch Day 2 of Relentless, I was so down. Instead, I curled up on the couch and watched Titanic, all the while crying into my pint of chocolate chip cookie dough. It was a pitiful sight to behold but, sadly, only the second most pathetic thing I'd done that weekend. As I watched the movie through a waterfall of tears, I couldn't help but wonder what was worse: freezing to death despite the fact there was enough room for you on the door, as well, OR losing to MeFisto?(as if the answer wasn't obvious!)

I went to bed without even knowing the results of that night's show. I didn't care, not even as co-General Manager. Why should I? For all I knew, my wrestling days were officially over. Forced to trade in my boots for a fancy suit, permanently, destined to a life of working as Atticus White's EQUAL until the day his heart finally gives out from all the chicken he, very likely, enjoys on a daily basis.

This was a moment in my life where I had a difficult choice to make, one that could very well shape the person I would become 10 years down the road. I thought about one of my favorite episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation called Tapestry. In it, Captain Picard dies because his artificial heart couldn't take a blast he suffered down on a planet. Q gives him the opportunity to go back in time to the point he was stabbed, the reason for his having an artificial heart to begin with, in order to save his life in the present. When he does so, he's returned to his time only to find he's no longer the daring, strong willed Captain the fans would know Picard to be, but rather a mere junior officer, forgettable to the rest of the crew. This is when he decides he would rather die the man he was, than survive as the sorry excuse he would become by not ever taking any risks. I slowly drifted off to sleep replaying the episode inside my head, imagining what I would do in Picard's position.

I awoke the next morning to the exact same words leaving my mouth as the day before, only this time they felt ALOT different to say.

"I can't believe I lost to MeFisto!" I chuckled, shaking my head.

I took my morning shit and laughed so hard over it, I barely had to push.

"I can't believe I lost to MeFisto!!!!!"

As I brushed my teeth, I took a good, hard look at the man in the mirror, a fool who paid a million dollars just to lose his Internet Championship.

"Oh maaaaan, I lost to MeFisto," I mumbled with a mouthful of toothpaste.

I plopped on the couch and turned on the TV, hoping to find something where Leonardo DiCaprio doesn't die. While flipping through the channels, I noticed a familiar face on the screen, causing me to stop on it. It was none other than a Powerade commercial featuring the very man who beat me for the Internet Championship...............

"OOOOOOOOOO YEAH, BROTHER!!!!!" MeFisto shouted into the camera, a Powerade in each hand and the Internet Title draped over his muscular shoulder. "WE HEAR AT POWERADE WOULD LIKE THE CONGRATULATE THE WONDERFUL, MAGNIFICENT MEFISTOOOOOO FOR HIS HARD FOUGHT VICTORY OVER LITTLE D........."

MeFisto struck a few poses, before continuing the sorry excuse for an ad.

"OOOOO YEAH, AND TO CELEBRATE THE HISTORIC WIN, WE'RE GONNA GIVE YOU THE MEFISTO DISCOUNT, BROTHER!!!!!" the buffoon rambled on. "OOOOOOOOOO, BROTHER, I'M SURE YOU'RE ALL WONDERING WHAT EXACTLY IS THE MEFISTO DISCOUNT.....................WELL LET ME TELL YA! OOOOOOO YEAH!!!!!"

As MeFisto explains, a bunch of digital numbers pop up around him, explaining the math behind it.

"EVERY POWERADE IS SIX CENTS OFF, BROTHER!!!!! WE'RE GIVING YOU ONE, TWO, THREE FOR THE FIRST TIME I PINNED DOUBLE D, AND THEN ANOTHER THREE FOR THE SECOND TIME!!!!! THAT'S 2x3, WHICH THE FINE PEOPLE AT POWERADE ARE TELLING ME IS SIX; AND SINCE THEY PAY MY BILLS, I'M NOT GONNA ARGUE WITH THEM, OOOOOOOOO YEA.........."

CLICK

I turned off my television and stared at the blank screen for a bit, taking in what I just saw. Had that advertisement come on yesterday, I'd most likely have my face buried in a tub of ice cream, blubbering about how I lost to THAT guy. But, today was a new day and I wasn't gonna let the fact a man who thinks Gatorade's red headed stepchild was THE ultimate thirst quencher ruin my career. It was one match, for a Championship that only him, myself, and Graves seem to care about. As humiliating as losing to MeFisto was, it's nowhere near as embarrassing as never stepping foot inside a ring again because of said loss; ESPECIALLY when I have a guaranteed opportunity to make things right and win back what's mine.

I was finished with the sulking, I'd done enough of it over the past 24 hours to last a lifetime. It was time to move on with my life and take care of business, all of which would start with a phone call to my co-General Manager.

"Big D!" Atticus answered, sounding suspiciously happy to hear from me. "Are you gonna make it to the show tonight, we certainly could use all the help we can get!"

"Nahhhhhhh, I need another day away to recharge," I responded, hearing a drawn out sigh from the other end. "But I'm sure you and Theoooooooo can handle it!"

"You know you're a terrible GM, right?" White asked after a brief moment of silence.

I chuckled, thinking about all the shit he put me through prior to my becoming his equal. "That may be so, but I'm still a million times better than you are!"

He didn't seem too amused by my comment. "....................what do you want?"

"Could you tell Vinnie I wanna invoke my rematch cause against MeFisto for the next edition of Anarchy?" I requested.

There was an even longer pause than the first time. "Did you really need to call ME for that?!" he asked, his level of annoyance growing.

"Well, noooooo," I replied. "But I figured I'd ask while I got you on the line."

"I'll let him know," Atticus responded in an overly polite, yet sarcastic, way. "Anything else?"

"Yes," I confirmed. "I'd like to be booked for the upcoming Savage, as well."

Once again, I was met with silence, this pause even longer than the previous two. "Are you sure that's a good idea?" he finally spoke with concern. "I don't want to anyone questioning the integrity of our office by having a GM competing on the show he works for."

"Integrity?!?" I blurted out. "You mean like having a security guard interfere in a match because you don't like one of the wrestlers in it?"

I was met with an even longer silence that went on so long, I wasn't even sure if Atticus was still on the other end. Eventually, though, the frustrated GM gave in to my request. "Well, you're in luck, I was in the process of putting the card together and needed an opponent for Isabella Ravenwolf............."

"Oh for crying out loud!" I whined. "I lose to MeFisto and now you wanna put me in the women's division!"

"Oh, don't worry, you weren't good enough to compete for the Shooting Star Championship BEFORE you lost to MeFisto," Atticus snarked with glee.

His trash talk caught me off guard, but I was more impressed than mad. "Okay, I'll give you props for that one," I admitted, proud he actually knew how to loosen up a bit. "But furreal, who the hell is that? Did James Raven marry one of those feminist bitches who insists on hyphenating their name?"

"What?! No, of course not!"

"Riiiiiiight, 'cause he's gay!"

"Jesus Christ, I don't have time for this!" Atticus exclaimed, causing me to momentarily pull my phone away from my ear. "She competed in the Relentless Battle Royal last year, you know, the one where Thunder Knuckles kicked your ass in his debut match! How the hell do I know this and you don't?!?! I wasn't even HERE for it!"

All of a sudden, I heard another voice speak to Atticus on the other end. "Uuuuh, Mr. White, we've got a problem! Barney Green's here, and there isn't enough food on the buffet to feed him AND the rest of the talent!"

"God dammit!" Atticus grumped with a long exhale. "If only I had a co-General Manager to take care of shit like this.........."

"I love you, too; tell Theo I said his name in the Bill Cosby voice, bye!" I said in one breath before hanging up.

Isabella Ravenwolf.

The name WAS familiar, but in a Boston Bruiser sort of way. There's been so many people who've come and gone, it's impossible to keep track of the ones who actually wrestled a match or two, let alone made an impression. That Relentless Battle Royal was such a shit show, how the hell WOULD I remember one of the peons that fell to TK and I?! And if she's wrestled a match since, it obviously didn't get her anywhere or else we'd be seeing her face plastered all over the place.

To avoid another MeFisto fiasco, I pulled up XWF's website and did a little search on my opponent, only to find that there wasn't a damn thing I didn't already know. Her name was Isabella Ravenwolf(or maybe there's an 'e' at the end? when you're irrelevant, people can't even spell your fuckin' name correctly) and she finished 3rd in the Relentless Battle Royal last year, behind me and ole 'Knucks. You'd think that means something, but considering the lack of talent in that match(it was the whole reason I entered last minute, and I would've won, too, had I not underestimated TK like I did MeFisto), it really wasn't. She beat Jim Jimson, whoopdi freaking doo! Who hasn't?!? I'm pretty sure even JIM's found away to defeat himself a time or two!

This was a sticky situation, and one I was gonna have to handle with care. If I underestimate Isabella like I did TK and MeFisto, I could end up on the receiving end of yet ANOTHER humiliating loss.................only this time, it would be SOOOOOO bad, I'd likely never be able to recover from it. And considering I still have alot more to accomplish before hanging up the boots permanently, I absolutely CANNOT allow that to happen.............

"Isabella Ravenwolf............... what is there to say about you that hasn't already been said? Nothing. You're the same woman you were when Thunder Knuckles eliminated you last year, and you'll CONTINUE to be a prime example of mediocrity once I'm through with you."

"While I know a woman like Sarah Lacklan could handle a full on Big D beatdown, something tells me a girl like you cannot. You could barely keep up in the Battle Royal, what's gonna happen when you go one on one with someone who doesn't have to worry about six other competitors attacking them from behind? What could YOU possibly do when you're up against a former TV, Xtreme, AND Internet Champion?............. I'll tell you what: lose. It's a shame you AREN'T James Raven's wife, because then you'd ACTUALLY know what true talent is.............. but don't worry, because I'm gonna show you at Savage!"

"Sure, I just lost to MeFisto, a fact I fully expect you to try and pick me apart with, but the thing is: even MEFISTO has accomplished more in XWF than you have, and ever will! NOTHING you can possibly say will make you look better than me! Big D got eliminated at War Games. AT LEAST I WAS THERE!!!!! Big D doesn't have a Title, anymore. NOT LIKE YOU EVER DID!!!! Sure, I've suffered some embarassing losses throughout my career, but I've ALWAYS bounced back from them............ which is alot more than anyone can say about YOU!!!! Isabella Ravenwolf loses a fuckin' Battle Royal and doesn't show her face for an entire year. What an embarrassment. If I ACTUALLY had some pull as General Manager, I'd make sure people like you were never allowed to compete here, but unfortunately we're an equal opportunity employer and alas, we won't turn away ANYONE, no matter how much they suck! Just ask Gilly.............."

I paused for a moment, thinking about the irony of how I said there WASN'T much to say about my opponent, only for me to go off on her like a Vietnamese prostitute. It had been a minute since I'd been in full blown promo mode, and DAMN did it feel good! I could only imagine how much better it'd feel if my opponent ACTUALLY mattered.

"If you're smart, you won't show up next Saturday. Instead, you'll continue your hiding and tell your children that you once competed in an XWF match. While it might not be the most glorious thing to brag about, it's really all you've got. And that ain't no story, it's the Cold, Big D Truth!!!!!"

Literally the moment I finished my rambling, the front door opened up and Krystal walked in.

"You look alot better than yesterday," she gleefully pointed out.

"I feel alot better!"" I replied, walking over to her and planting a big ole smooch on her lips. "I think I'd like to watch Day 3 of Relentless."

My words caught Krystal by surprise. "Really?!"

"Yeah," I said with a smile. "They ARE my employees, afterall. Not to mention, I'm VERY curious about that Universal Title match...................... seeing as how I plan on challenging for it someday."

Krystal called my smile and raised me a grin. "Well, I'm glad you could bounce back." she replied before disappearing into the kitchen.

I turned on the TV just in time for the Anarchy Championship match. As I watched, I couldn't help but think about the Anarchy belt I held just 48 hours ago. It was a bad loss, but there was no reason I COULDN'T bounce back. If I could win my Title back from MeFisto next Anarchy, I'd be walking into Savage, once again, as the Internet Champion. And if that happens, I'll be right back where I left off.

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